Should I just lie and say we’re getting married after giving birth?
…That won’t work. Then they’ll ask when the wedding invitation is coming even after the baby is born.
Even if they don’t ask directly, it’s obvious they’ll gossip behind my back. I should just vaguely brush past the marriage talk.
Putting my worries aside, I took out the glasses from under the monitor, put them on, and started work.
After eating lunch, I was fighting off drowsiness and tapping on the keyboard when my phone screen flashed. When I checked, there was a message from Haemin.
[Myeong Haemin: Meet me on the 1st floor after work]
It was already afternoon and she was probably checking in because she was getting tired of working. I replied that I understood and turned my gaze back to the monitor.
I’m so sleepy…
Morning sickness is hard, but honestly this was also a problem at the company.
I’m so sleepy. So, so sleepy. Especially after meals, I was so drowsy I couldn’t even focus.
I don’t know how many cans of mint-flavored candy I’ve been eating lately. The deputy manager sitting next to me has shaken me awake more than once or twice. I heard this gets better once I enter the stable period, but I don’t know.
My typing gradually slowed down. I was clearly looking at the screen, but none of the content was entering my head.
To refresh my mind, I repeatedly recited today’s schedule in my head.
First, after work today, I’ll eat dinner with Haemin, tell her what happened with Kim Minwoo, and that Kim Minwoo is Won Dogyeong—maybe a bit later…
Ah… I’m sleepy.
“Deputy Manager Yeo! Wake up. You can’t sleep at the company.”
I opened my eyes with a start because of the hand shaking my shoulder and the section chief’s firm voice. I hurriedly bowed my head and apologized.
The section chief was standing next to my seat with a worried face. I could feel the team members perking up their ears while pretending not to.
“Is something going on with you lately?”
“No… I’m fine. I’m sorry.”
“Alright, take care of yourself, and if you’re too sleepy, go upstairs and get some air.”
“…Yes.”
Seeing him ask if something was going on lately, it seemed the section chief had also been holding back before saying something. Since continuing to work at the company was my decision, I need to do well. I put my glasses down on the desk and was lifting my head while dry-washing my face when I locked eyes with Deputy Manager Han, who was standing there awkwardly.
It seemed he’d come down briefly to deliver documents. He hesitated, then mouthed “Are you okay?” I nodded and smiled sheepishly.
Ah, this is embarrassing. What kind of day is this?
After getting scolded once, perhaps because my mind snapped awake, there was no further incident of dozing off until quitting time. As expected, what’s above hormones is the sense of urgency toward making a living.
When it was time to leave work, I quickly gathered my things and got up from my seat. The deputy manager next to me said goodbye, saying see you tomorrow. It might be my imagination, but he seemed a bit nicer today. He probably felt bad that I got scolded by the section chief.
I took the crowded elevator down to the first floor, and Haemin was waiting in the lobby. I came down right away too, but I have no idea how she got down faster than me.
“Oh, you’re here?”
“You’re really fast.”
“I’m a leaving-work expert. What do you want to eat?”
Fortunately, today the morning sickness wasn’t severe enough to kill me. I was even prepared to postpone our plans if it got too hard, but it seemed like it would be okay.
“Something that doesn’t smell.”
“Smell? Oh, don’t tell me…”
When I nodded at Haemin, who asked with a surprised expression, she muttered as if amazed.
“It’s really true…”
“Would it be fake?”
“All I know around here are meat restaurants. What else is there? Porridge? Want to eat porridge?”
“I’m okay with it, but will that be enough for you?”
“Hmm, or want to come to my place?”
I was tempted. I’d been to Haemin’s place a few times, and it was close—about two subway stops from the company. It wouldn’t be noisy, and if we ordered delivery, Haemin could eat something else, so it seemed okay.
“Is that okay?”
“Yeah, it’s clean right now.”
“Then let’s do that, and let’s take a taxi. I’ll pay.”
I really don’t want to take public transportation. There are too many people during rush hour anyway.
We took a taxi to Haemin’s place. On the way, we packaged porridge from a porridge shop near the company, and Haemin pondered for a long time about what food doesn’t smell, then said she’d toast a bagel at home, so I apologized saying I’d definitely buy her something delicious once the morning sickness passed.
Haemin said it was fine, but I felt sorry that she couldn’t eat a proper meal because of me. She really loves alcohol too, but today she can’t even drink.
“Is it edible?”
Haemin asked while spreading cream cheese on her bagel. I cooled down the thin vegetable porridge I’d packaged and put it in my mouth, chewing while nodding.
“It’s delicious.”
“That’s a relief. Now tell me. What happened with Kim Minwoo?”
“We decided to… meet?”
“Oh, are you dating? He says he likes you, right?”
Haemin chewed her bagel and sparkled her eyes with interest. It’s evening and she even managed to drink coffee. Does she even get sleepy like that?
“…He says so. But we’re not dating… or are we?”
“What kind of talk is this again?”
“We decided to think about it, about dating. But to say we’re not dating now is a bit different from before… I don’t know.”
Haemin, who scrunched up her face as if frustrated, put down her bagel and shrugged her shoulders.
“Just date him. What’s the problem? You even have a baby.”
“Hey, I’ve known him since he was 7 years old.”
“What does that matter, you’re twenty-nine now. You wouldn’t have said you’d think about it if you didn’t like him either.”
“Who said I didn’t like him? I just need a bit of time.”
Haemin crunched on the slightly overtoasted bagel. At that level, isn’t it just a bagel chip?
I just silently slurped my porridge.
We haven’t talked about dating or not since then, but actually, to say we’re not dating, Won Dogyeong keeps grabbing my hand using pheromones as an excuse all the time, and small touches have noticeably increased.
If this is friendship, I have no friends except Won Dogyeong.
She seemed to think about something for a moment, then turned around and said.
“Kim Minwoo was neat-looking.”
She was talking about the day he came to pick me up and entered the lobby. Also, it was the day Won Dogyeong and I fought because of the text Haemin sent.
What did I say? Did I say it was too much? Back then, I didn’t even know it was about him.
I recall his red face contorted as if he was about to cry. It was really bewildering.
“What could you even see? He was all covered up.”
“You can tell just by looking. He’s definitely handsome.”
“…He is handsome.”
With his sharply extended eyes, straight nose bridge, and stubborn lips, even if he’s a bit pretty, he’s more than qualified to be called handsome.
And actually, you know him too. It’s Won Dogyeong, that actor who lives with some omega.
I swallowed the confession that rose to my throat. This is something I need to discuss with Won Dogyeong before saying it.
“Someone else might snatch him up at this rate.”
“What, Kim Minwoo?”
“Yeah. You even have a baby together, but if you keep being this lukewarm, Kim Minwoo might get hurt too.”
Won Dogyeong going to someone else?
But he said he likes me.
No, I don’t know. Even when watching the drama yesterday, didn’t he keep his mouth shut even though his ex was on TV? There must have been tons of people he dated in the dramas and movies we’ve watched together. Without knowing, I might have praised Won Dogyeong’s ex-lovers saying they acted well.
There was also a high possibility that someone would approach him in the future. While doing the same work, he might run into Han Hoyeon again someday. Moreover, he’s surrounded by nothing but pretty and handsome people.
…Am I really being too complacent?
Thinking about it, it’s always Won Dogyeong who asks to hold hands, and it’s all Won Dogyeong who comes next to me and clings. I’ve just been staying still and letting Won Dogyeong do as he pleases because it was awkward.
I didn’t mean to, but from the beginning until now, I’ve basically just been pushing him away.
We decided to try dating, but should I put in more effort too? My head suddenly became confused.
“How’s your body? Are you okay besides the morning sickness?”
“Uh, yeah… I’m really sleepy. I dozed off today and got scolded.”
“Wow, what are you going to do?”
“They say it gets better after a while.”
We cleared the dinner table once and brought snacks from the kitchen, spread them on the table, ate them, and chatted. Haemin laughed heartily at the fact that the baby’s prenatal name was Yongyong, saying she’d definitely find and gift me underwear with a dragon pattern on it.
She said she’s going on a blind date next week. How long has it been since she broke up, she’s so fast. Haemin said she gets bored if she’s not dating. As someone who dates when it happens and doesn’t when it doesn’t, it’s a feeling I can’t understand.
She asked if I knew anyone decent for her, and while I was holding my phone and browsing through my contacts, the phone rang. It was Won Dogyeong. Looking at the time, it was already past 10 PM. He kept saying he’d come pick me up, so I promised to contact him if I was running late, but oops.
“Let me take this call for a second.”
“Mm.”
Haemin waved her hand as if to say hurry up and answer while sucking down the rest of her coffee. Perhaps she’d figured out who it was, she was looking at me with an intrigued gaze, which was a bit burdensome.
“Hello.”
– Yeah. Where are you?
“At Haemin’s place.”
– …Place?
There was a moment of silence beyond the receiver, then Won Dogyeong asked back in a low voice.
“Uh, yeah…”
I answered a bit bewildered by the unexpected reaction, but the answer that soon came back was calm as usual.
– Okay. Call me before you leave, I’ll come pick you up.
“Mm. Okay.”
I hung up and just rolled my eyes in confusion. His voice had sunken. Is he angry because I contacted him late?
