“Ugh, what are you on about. Get yourself together first.”
“…Say you won’t date anyone. Okay?”
When Doyun refused to give him the answer he wanted, Eunho’s expression hardened and he went limp, collapsing face-down on top of Doyun. The sudden weight knocked the breath out of him. Doyun thumped his hands against Eunho’s back.
“Seriously! Hey, you know I’m a beta, right? Did you forget that too in your drunken state?”
“Being a beta doesn’t mean you can’t do it with a guy. It’s not like I only like omegas. Doing it from behind…. There are plenty of male betas who are crazy about it. Guys can feel it that way too.”
Doyun had absolutely no immunity to this kind of dirty talk or teasing. His mind went completely blank as he tried to figure out how to respond to these casual words from Eunho, who seemed like he could spout filth as naturally as breathing if he put his mind to it. On top of that, Eunho’s hand, which had been sliding down along Doyun’s thigh, casually grazed the area near his backside.
“Hey, that — ha, seriously. Are you really going to keep saying stuff like that between friends. Cut it out.”
Doyun spoke to Eunho in a fairly firm tone, letting out a flustered breath.
“…I don’t want to just be your friend.”
A heavily suppressed voice spilled out of Eunho, who had buried his face in the crook of Doyun’s neck. The level of what drunk Eunho was saying was slowly creeping past what Doyun could handle.
“Hey, you’re crossing a line. Dial it back a little, would you?”
Doyun shoved Eunho, who had been leaning on top of him, away with force. Whether it was because Eunho had gone completely limp, he pushed him off more easily than expected, then climbed down to sit on the floor with his back against the sofa. Eunho’s eyes were starting to droop closed. Each time those long lashes fluttered as his eyes slowly blinked open and shut, they trembled faintly.
“Don’t get attached to babies either. Kids…. They just cry and don’t know how to do anything, they’re just annoying.”
“Ha, what are you even saying…. Just go to sleep.”
Fed up with Eunho’s continued nonsense, Doyun finally shook his own head in exasperation. He’d spent so much energy hauling Eunho from Suhyeok’s place all the way here, and then on top of that had been roughhousing and fooling around with Eunho after they arrived, so he’d worked up a bit of a sweat. As Doyun flapped his t-shirt to cool himself down, Eunho’s pinky finger appeared in front of his face.
“Doyun, promise me.”
“Promise what.”
Eunho brought his pinky finger even closer to Doyun’s face. At this rate, he was going to poke him in the nostril.
“That you won’t date any guys. Alpha, beta, omega. Regardless of secondary gender, all of them.”
“Ugh, why do I have to promise something like that. I’m a beta!”
He’d leaned in expecting something grand and important — only to hear don’t date any guys. Doyun was certain it was just Eunho’s drunken rambling, and pushed away the pinky finger hovering in front of his face. Eunho’s expression darkened in an instant.
“…Why can’t you just do it? It’s such a simple thing.”
Eunho brought his pinky back to his chest and pulled at Doyun’s hand. There was a subtle strength in the gesture. As if drawn in by something, Doyun hooked his finger with Eunho’s and made the promise.
“…….”
“…….”
Just as the silence that settled between them was starting to feel suffocating, Eunho stretched both arms out wide. This time it wasn’t a serious voice. It was Eunho’s warm, affectionate tone — the one with a touch of playfulness that only came out when they were alone together.
“…Hold me.”
Doyun tucked himself snugly into the space Eunho had made with his outstretched arms. Being held that close, a pleasant scent drifted from Eunho’s neck — especially near his ear. It was faint but sweet, the kind that made your body feel pleasantly languid. Breathing it in, drowsiness washed over Doyun all over again.
“Am I still on death row?”
Doyun tossed out the question he’d been quietly keeping to himself since earlier. At his words, Eunho laughed. The gentle vibration of Eunho’s chest reverberated through Doyun’s entire body.
“…No. You’re too precious to kill off.”
“Unbelievable…. Then why did you so rashly sentence me to death in the first place.”
Doyun’s words were growing more drawn out by the second. Eunho’s soft voice drifted into his ear. A sweet proposition.
“Want me to reduce your sentence?”
“…Go ahead.”
“Then — life in prison.”
It wasn’t exactly a sentence he was thrilled about — but with the vague thought that it was still better than death, Doyun drifted off to sleep. With his vision cut off, Eunho’s scent grew stronger.
03.
What floor was their place again. If I fell from here, could I die….
No, wait — before thinking about that, shouldn’t I have died of shame on my own if I had any sense at all. Doyun bit down on his lower lip and held his breath as carefully as he could. He peeled away Eunho’s arms — which had been wrapped around his waist and shoulder — as gently as possible.
Slipping quietly out of place, Doyun picked up the jacket that had fallen to the floor. Right next to it was what appeared to be Eunho’s t-shirt. Looking at Eunho’s snow-white t-shirt, Doyun felt a strange guilt wash over him, as if he’d made some kind of one-night mistake. He looked down at the bed and found Eunho lying face-down, his upper body completely bare.
Bright sunlight filtered in through the window, filling the room with light. The defined muscles of Eunho’s back rippled as he shifted in his sleep. Unable to bring himself to keep looking, Doyun squeezed his eyes shut.
Just then, both Doyun’s and Eunho’s phones vibrated at the same time. Startled, Doyun swallowed a gasp and quickly snatched his phone from the bedside.
“Mmm….”
Eunho let out a soft groan and adjusted his position from lying face-down to lying flat on his back. The smooth curves of Eunho’s muscular chest came into view all at once. Doyun bolted straight out of Eunho’s room.
The “Never Fight Again” party was a great time. Thanks to your little lovers’ quarrel, I even got free whiskey. Appreciated.
Minjun’s courteous text, followed by,
Did you make up with Eunho?
Suhyeok’s concerned message — both had come in one after the other. He must have sent something similar to Eunho as well, because around the same time, the sound of vibration could be heard from nearby. Doyun passed through the living room and headed for the entryway. The shoes he’d kicked off in a hurry when they came in were scattered haphazardly. With each step he took, his damp underwear clung to the inside of his backside and he grimaced.
He’d had another wet dream.
This time, the dream had been vivid and specific.
The main character was Eunho.
***
As he hailed a taxi and headed back to his studio apartment, he wondered whether he should have left a note. No — if he’d had the composure for that, he wouldn’t have bolted so blindly from Eunho’s place in the first place. The moment he got home, Doyun stripped off his clothes and threw them aside. When his underwear fell at his feet, he muttered “Jesus….” under his breath, then picked them up roughly and headed for the bathroom.
Figuring he needed to clear his head, he showered under water so cold it felt like it was chilling him to the bone. In the corner of the shower, the crumpled grey boxer briefs he’d thrown there slowly darkened as they soaked through with water. He felt like his own heart was being scorched just as dark — just like those filthy underwear. Doyun let his head fall forward against the shower wall.
Thud. Thud. The sound that could have cracked the wall rang out as many times as the number of wet dreams he’d had so far.
He washed the underwear out roughly. Seeing them hanging in the corner of his room to dry made him flush with equal parts embarrassment and self-loathing. Even after banging his head against the wall twice, the dream was still vivid.
Since he wasn’t exactly well-versed in the specifics of sex between men, the dream hadn’t been overly detailed. That, at least, was a silver lining. In the dream, Eunho had been completely naked, rolling his hips. His skin glistening with sweat that had soaked through his entire body….
Sasilverho!
“Ah, god. Jesus, what the—”
Eunho’s name — saved in Minjun’s characteristically tacky contact style — flashed across the screen. Doyun recoiled as if he’d seen a ghost and flung the phone into the corner of the bed. In the quiet of the room, the relentless buzzing kept going.
The vibrating would stop for a moment — and just as Doyun crept carefully toward the phone, it would start again, as if to say “gotcha.” Is he actually watching me somehow? That’s how relentlessly Eunho kept calling.
Sasilverho!
Sasilverho!
Sasilverho!
Sasilverho!
The intervals between calls were growing shorter, as if he planned to keep going until Doyun picked up. Doyun breathed slowly and steadily, and when he felt his heart had settled just enough, he answered Eunho’s call.
