The practice room had become familiar now.
Today, practice for Battle Crown’s final competition was in full swing.
Because it was the last competition, the broadcasting station, the agency, and the members were all pouring their hearts into it. The theme of the final competition was each group’s new song.
In that grave atmosphere, Sehyun stood in front of the whiteboard and picked up a board marker.
Initial resolve.
Two characters were written in black on the white board.
“Find our initial resolve?”
Yunbeom, who was sprawled out roughly in the practice room, grumbled.
“Our song talks about youth right now. What we need to equip ourselves with right now is our initial resolve.”
We’ve only been active for three years—too soon to lose our initial resolve, man.
“When have we ever gotten lax?”
“Well, I wrote it down like this for now, but we’ll do what we’ve always done. Just like back then when we bet our entire lives on our debut.”
“Until now, the concept has been really clear, but doesn’t this one lack something? Isn’t it a bit weak to just push youth alone?”
“We have to match the song’s atmosphere. What’s important to us now isn’t winning Battle Crown, but OnX’s success, right?”
The program’s finale—his will to properly promote the new song rather than winning was evident.
“Everyone will come with their knives sharpened, so I’m still a bit worried about something refreshing.”
Eden also chimed in.
“Anyway, this time whoever has the good song wins. Until now, we’ve shown existing songs, so we had to add different direction to stand out.”
Sehyun was unwavering. He just seemed like someone who had everything prepared.
“The background is a beach concept. Five members who were wandering gather and become one team.”
“How do we express the sand on the floor?”
“We have to lay it down.”
“That won’t be as easy as we think.”
Opinions were divided. But Sehyun had already aligned his opinions sufficiently with the company’s performance director, so he was confident. Even if they couldn’t win, they would definitely imprint this album’s concept.
“But as the hyungs say, performance is of course important too, so we’ll add a few more devices. You absolutely can’t think it’s easy because of the sand and water. There’s also the safety issue.”
Certainly, dancing on sand would feel like being tortured.
“But we’ll look really cool.”
Sehyun looked at the members warmly, as if he’d already seen the stage. He became curious about the picture that existed beyond his gaze.
To resolve that curiosity, he had to accept what Lim Sehyun was proposing.
“I’m for it.”
“I like it too.”
“I think it’ll be fresh because it’s so different from the stages we’ve done so far.”
As the atmosphere flowed toward everyone agreeing, Sehyun nodded proudly.
“Alright, then shall we look at the choreography draft?”
And so again, the endless cycle of practice unfolded.
* * *
How nice would it be if there was only one worry in the world?
Doha had many worries. Battle Crown, withdrawal, grandfather, Seo Yungyeom’s proposal, and so on.
What is life?
“So, Doha. Have you thought about it?”
Cheolhwan asked as he handed Doha a water bottle.
“About what?”
“The featuring.”
“Ah…… As I thought, wouldn’t it be right to refuse?”
Doha opened his mouth with difficulty while fiddling with the water bottle cap. Cheolhwan’s eyebrows twitched.
“Refuse? Why? Is the song not good?”
“No. The song was good. Sunbae-nim played it for me directly, and the song was really, really good.”
“Then what’s the problem? Is Seo Yungyeom going to eat you or something?”
“No, it’s not that……”
Doha let out a deep sigh.
“Hyung, you know too. That I’m not that good at singing. I only have a few lines of parts in the team, but featuring in a great sunbae-nim’s song? What if I just ruin the song after joining in for no reason?”
That was sincere. He didn’t know what Baek Doha’s original skill level was, but the current Doha was just at a level of imitation.
No matter how much he was covering it with practice, putting his voice on a 15-year veteran singer’s album was a different dimension of problem. Moreover, he was already overwhelmed with preparing for the final competition.
Right, that’s the problem. He was too overwhelmed with just the homework laid out in front of him.
“Still, if it’s Seo Yungyeom, there’ll be a lot to learn. He’s famous for being quite the perfectionist.”
Then all the more reason to decline. One perfectionist in Lim Sehyun was enough.
“When this album comes out, the buzz will be no joke. It’s not just you—it’s a huge boon for promoting our OnX’s name too. The PR team is already counting their chickens.”
“But……”
“Don’t worry about your skills. Is Seo Yungyeom tone-deaf? He asked you because your voice is needed for the song. Would that picky guy have just randomly picked anyone? He proposed it because your voice tone matches the song.”
“Let me think about it a bit more.”
Let’s avoid it for now.
“Think about it positively.”
“Yes.”
He planned to think positively about how to refuse well.
As he was having a conversation with Cheolhwan, the members trudged over one by one.
“Ah, I’m dying from exhaustion. Have you memorized it?”
At Yunbeom’s question, Doha shook his head. As always. It’s damn hard to memorize.
“Ugh, I have to go to additional recording at night too.”
Poor thing.
When he looked at Yunbeom with pitying eyes, he said,
“You have to go too. Who are you looking at pitifully?”
“Ah.”
Annoying. Lim Sehyun.
* * *
At night, he was really dragged to the recording studio. As he dozed off on the studio sofa, Yunbeom’s work had finished.
“I’m going to go home and sleep first. I can’t hold out anymore.”
When Yunbeom announced his departure first, Doha shook with a sense of betrayal.
Someone waited while napping on the sofa!
After Yunbeom left abruptly, Doha entered the recording booth. He skimmed over the lyrics of the new song he’d memorized perfectly.
[Ripped jeans, muddy sneakers We don’t care,
We just run (Zoom) Delete yesterday when we were cowards With you here, I’m not afraid anymore.
No way Under the hot sun, burning Chemistry This isn’t a dream, unfolding Fantasy
Trapped in this season, my heart about to burst says, we’re alive right now Shake off those scraped knees (Hey!)]
He carefully opened his mouth to match the rhythm coming through the headphones.
.
.
.
“Again. Your breathing is too short.”
It was already the umpteenth “again.” His throat stung and his legs were shaky. But beyond the glass, Lim Sehyun was staring at the mixing console without a single sign of exhaustion.
“Hyung, I told you not to let your falsetto scatter like that there. Hold it more firmly.”
“Hey, is that as easy as it sounds……”
“It’s not easy, so that’s why we’re continuing until this hour. I’m going again.”
The music started flowing again. Doha swallowed dry saliva and opened his mouth. But his breathing fell short, so his voice kept wavering.
“Stop.”
The music cut off sharply.
“Ah, seriously.”
He could see Sehyun irritably throwing off his headset. Doha hunched his shoulders. He was preparing himself mentally, thinking he’d get another earful, when Sehyun, who had stood up abruptly, strode toward the booth.
Click.
The thick soundproof door opened, and Sehyun stepped inside. When two grown men entered the narrow booth, the space instantly filled up.
“Hyung.”
Sehyun approached right up to Doha’s nose.
“Why does your voice keep floating up? I told you to put strength in your stomach.”
“I am putting strength in it. I’m doing my best too.”
“You’re just pretending to.”
Sehyun reached toward Doha’s waist as if frustrated.
“Excuse me for a moment.”
“……Hey, you what, urk!”
Sehyun’s large palm pressed firmly on Doha’s lower abdomen, near his dantian. Hot body heat was felt intensely with only a thin t-shirt between them.
Doha tried to pull his body back in surprise, but Sehyun’s strength was stronger.
“Don’t run away. Here. Put strength right here.”
Sehyun didn’t care and pressed harder with his hand. His firm, long fingers moved as if feeling around the abdominal muscles.
“Try breathing in. Deeply.”
“……Hup.”
“More. With the feeling of pushing my hand away.”
Doha breathed in as Sehyun instructed. His stomach swelled and pushed Sehyun’s palm away.
It was strange. The situation where someone else’s hand, and Lim Sehyun’s hand at that, was groping his stomach like this.
“Right, there. Don’t let it out in that state—hold it and make the sound.”
Sehyun’s gaze slowly rose from Doha’s stomach. Past his chest, past his Adam’s apple, it reached Doha’s eyes.
A narrow space. Close enough to hear each other’s breathing. Sehyun’s eyes looked particularly dark and deep.
“……”
“……”
For a moment, silence flowed. The peculiarly stuffy air of the recording studio enveloped the two. Doha stopped breathing.
Is this place originally this lacking in oxygen?
Breathing felt awkward. It was one of those moments when something natural suddenly becomes unfamiliar.
Sehyun didn’t remove the hand pressing on his stomach. Rather, with his thumb, he gently rubbed near Doha’s solar plexus. Each of those minute movements set his nerves on edge.
“……Hyung. But you know.”
Sehyun called Doha in a low voice. It wasn’t his usual playful voice. A damp, low voice, as if soaked with moisture.
“What?”
Doha replied pretending to be calm, but the end of his voice trembled slightly. Sehyun stared intently at Doha without avoiding his eyes.
“Why did you try to quit being an idol?”
“Why are you asking that here?”
In this close state, at a distance where you could reach just by extending your hand, if you ask it’s scary! It feels like you might grab me by the collar at any moment.
You let it slide when I was singing about withdrawal, so why now?
“Don’t deflect, answer me.”
“You’re right.”
He readily admitted it. Because that was the truth.
“Why?”
“Because it’s hard. It doesn’t suit me.”
“That’s all?”
Could there be a greater reason than this? How big a reason is it that it doesn’t suit your constitution!
Sehyun’s eyebrows twitched. He seemed to want a more convincing reason.
