While rubbing his easily reddening earlobe incidentally, he continued the conversation.
“…But I think that’s a different story from that.”
“…”
“You’re a good person, hyung. That’s how it’s been from what I’ve experienced so far.”
That’s why I keep liking you more… Even with the volume decreasing like an ant, a hesitant look was fully evident. At the sight of him losing his seriousness in an instant and rolling his eyes around, his breath opened up as if air was escaping along with it.
Eunha, who let out a lifeless chuckle, shot back like a joke. Keep liking me more…
“That’s unfortunate.”
“…It’s going to keep getting more unfortunate from now on.”
“That’s really regrettable news…”
When he played along, Yeonjun laughed with a snicker. In the deflated atmosphere, Eunha quietly mulled it over. A good person. He suddenly became a little worried about just how far the balloon of fantasy that must be growing inside Yeonjun would inflate. Because the impact of the moment it bursts would also be enormous in proportion to how much it grows.
He gradually continued the meal that had been pushed to the back for a while due to conversation. Accurately, he put on an act of eating appropriately to acknowledge the other person’s sincerity, then put down his chopsticks. The feeling of fullness had been rising for quite a while.
“I’m full.”
At the calm declaration, Yeonjun whipped his head around with an absurd face. It was the most dramatic expression change he’d seen today. This time it was Eunha who rolled his eyes.
“What are you talking about…?”
“That’s what I told you not to order so much.”
Despite Eunha’s dissuasion, he had ordered two plates of 12-piece sushi plus shrimp tempura, chicken tempura, salmon salad, and even cold soba noodles. How was he supposed to eat all that much? He was really full. The fact that his stomach had shrunk from habitually skipping meals must have played a part.
“You can’t call this much a lot, hyung. We’re two adult men.”
“There are adult men who eat small portions too.”
“No, but still. I deliberately ordered little in the first place because I didn’t think you’d eat much, hyung. Haven’t you only eaten like five pieces of sushi now?”
“I ate one shrimp tempura too.”
“I see… That’s impressive.”
While Eunha chuckled at the soulless obedient answer, Yeonjun reached out his hand with a dissatisfied complexion as if it bothered him. He grabbed Eunha’s arm, then began to slowly feel his entire forearm. It was immediately conveyed that regret was mixed in that touch that seemed to be measuring thickness. It seemed like he had a lot he wanted to say related to it, but he didn’t add words. As if keeping the line. He was always a kid who never prolonged words more than necessary.
The conversation naturally moved on to idle chat. Sharing everyday stories, then briefly talking about entertainers on TV, then briefly talking about some famous male celebrity who came out in a commercial who had come out.
It was around the time they were about to leave the house after clearing away the meal. When Eunha was about to exit the entrance, turning down Yeonjun who was displaying the strange consideration of taking him down to the lower floor.
“Hyung.”
“Yeah.”
“Sleep well.”
“…”
It was a common greeting. However, it was a greeting that sounded strangely unfamiliar. Eunha met eyes with the gaze that was quietly looking at him.
“I’m worried. I’m concerned.”
It was a tone containing only sincerity, and so it became awkward.
“…Why are you like that? You worry about yourself.”
“Why? Again, I’m young so I can’t even worry?”
It was a sharp tone but didn’t contain malice. It was closer to an attitude of lightly whining to the end. When he snorted as if answering, Yeonjun also let out a bland laugh. His hand pulled over one of Eunha’s wrists.
“If you can’t sleep again, hyung.”
“…”
“Tell me then.”
Without a series of measures, sleep almost always didn’t come. So the expression ‘again’ wasn’t right. To Eunha, it sounded no different from requesting him to say those words to him in about two days. Instead of answering, he asked back.
“If I tell you?”
“Well.”
He, who answered vaguely first, belatedly added the main point.
“However you want, hyung.”
I said I don’t mind. Those words followed like a phantom. What is he thinking saying something like this? Eunha stood there with a look that said he didn’t know, then left that house’s entrance.
**Chapter 3**
Was it thanks to receiving IV fluids? Or was it for some other reason? Eunha slept deeply for about two days. And then he entered sleepless nights again. There was nothing particularly problematic. He planned to rely on medication for the time being. He came to the conclusion that it was better than alcohol. Drinking alone at home… because it reminded him of the emotions and sensations of a time that felt like a process of slowly dying.
**Kim Taeyoung**
I’m coming back to Korea soon lol
What should I buy as a gift
It was during a drive after work, aimlessly and thoughtlessly without a destination. While receiving the wind with the convertible car roof pulled back, he stopped on a roadside where tree shade was cast. He casually checked his phone and discovered a message from Kim Taeyoung. After roaming every corner of Europe for two months, it seemed he was finally returning home.
Where are you now, hyung?
**Kim Taeyoung**
I’m in England
(Photo)
(Photo)
Is there anything you want?
Along with a few selfies with a spectacular landscape as the background—spectacular only in the landscape—a reply came right away. England. An item on a wish list he’d been eyeing recently came to Eunha’s mind, and he immediately typed it out clearly and sent it.
I want an Aston Martin Vantage new model
**Kim Taeyoung**
?
Along with an immediate read receipt, a new answer appeared. Leaving behind what seemed like a sufficient response, he checked the group chat with friends where tag notifications had come. Because hundreds of messages piled up even if left alone for just a day, he couldn’t read them every day and was in a state of pressing through them once every few days like doing homework.
Reading only the main points quickly, it seemed they were exchanging stories about travel. That they should all match their vacation periods during summer and go on a trip, whether to a domestic villa or abroad.
Especially Lee Eunha, let’s definitely go together. Records of repeatedly tagging and making an uproar remained quite long. That there’s no reason for the building owner who’s the most free among them not to participate, that they’ll answer before they sit in that damn cafe and hold a group protest… The violently protesting content kept coming endlessly.
Because he knew well that that exaggerated reproach was the maximum disappointment they could show, it was only bitter.
**Park Hyeonji**
Oh
It’s Lee Eunha lol
Answer
Let’s go on a trip
@Lee Eunha
During July
Messages appeared in real time. It seemed she was looking into the chat room at the same time. Park Hyeonji, who caught red-handed that the last read receipt had disappeared, began pouring out threats ceaselessly. How scary… Eunha sent one message before other friends appeared and hurriedly left the chat room.
I’ll go if I have time
If he were Park Hyeonji, if he were the friends in that room, he thought swear words would have spontaneously burst out the moment they read it. They would have been sick of him calling him a terrible bastard, been disappointed, hated him, and wanted to rather cut ties. That they’d tried hard enough. So they wouldn’t even look anymore…
Eunha returned that guess to himself as if it were his friends’ actual inner thoughts. He swallowed it as if he’d heard it directly. It was shallow and cowardly self-abuse that couldn’t even become self-pity.
