Thinking about various things while walking, it did seem to become somewhat organized after all.
The night wind felt even colder, but it didn’t matter at all.
With a feeling much better than before, Taeon was walking along a main road with few people when he looked up at the night sky. Even though he knew you couldn’t see stars well in the city.
It was strange how just knowing that stars existed even though they weren’t visible was comforting.
As the texture of his complicated thoughts became somewhat organized, his mood improved too.
When he started to pick up the pace of his steps walking toward home, Taeon’s phone rang.
On the phone’s LCD screen was the name of someone he’d been in contact with far more frequently than even Sunjeong lately. Kim Yuwon noona.
“Hello.”
—Oh, Taeon. What are you doing?
Behind Yuwon’s always moderately calm voice, noisy music echoed.
“I met a friend briefly and I’m heading home.”
—Hey, you said you’re preparing for the college entrance exam, you can’t skip out and play like that.
“It was an important appointment.”
—Important? Not a friend but a boyfriend or girlfriend? Noona knows you don’t have any.
For a moment, Taeon’s brow furrowed.
From the day he was introduced to Yuwon through a volunteer he occasionally exchanged greetings with until a few days ago when he last received tutoring, Yuwon had always been calm. She didn’t sparkle her eyes while looking at Taeon’s face, nor did she show any particular interest.
After taking lessons nearly ten times, they’d become close enough that the older Yuwon had been speaking informally for several weeks now, yet they hardly talked about personal matters.
And yet calling from a noisy place at this hour to ask such questions.
“You don’t need to know.”
Taeon deliberately spoke in a voice colder than his current mood. It couldn’t be helped if she thought he was rude.
—Why don’t I need to know? I’m your tutor.
“You just need to teach English well.”
—You’re funny. Teaching for that money, not just anyone can do it.
Yuwon received 30,000 won per hour. The volunteer who introduced her had said that for a Yeonhui University student tutor—the prestigious university second only to Hanguk University—it was the absolute lowest hourly rate.
Thinking of Sunjeong earlier confidently mentioning an hourly rate of “10,000 won” made him chuckle.
“Your English score on the practice exam you took this time went up from your practice exam scores when you were a student.”
—So what.
“Just, think about noona a bit.”
—Why should I? Why are you calling so late at night?
Taeon’s tone was becoming increasingly rough.
Originally, Taeon always spoke curtly like this unless he was meeting someone during a heat cycle or rut. Even at the café, he only maintained minimal courtesy as a service worker and was rather cold to people trying to get his number.
He’d been fairly kind to Yuwon since he was receiving considerable help from her and she was in the position of teacher—had that been a mistake?
—You’re scary and cute when you’re angry. Noona will buy you drinks, so come out. Let’s talk about life and stuff.
If she’d been interested, it would have shown earlier. A person’s pupils can’t hide many things.
Probably Yuwon calling Taeon at this hour and approaching him this way was because her heart was just as light as her current behavior. Even if he was an omega, it wasn’t at all a situation requiring suppressants.
“I won’t be taking tutoring anymore. I’m hanging up.”
After Taeon spoke firmly and hung up, the phone bell immediately started ringing noisily.
Taeon pressed the reject button and then blocked Yuwon’s number as well.
A sigh came out automatically. Taeon was really weak in English, and Yuwon had been a good tutor anyway. It had been so nice that she explained the grammatical parts Taeon was weak in so they were easy to understand.
It would be difficult to find such affordable tutoring again, so should he listen to online lectures or something?
His mood plummeted to rock bottom in an instant.
In the neighborhood, at least everyone had known each other since childhood, and life was hard enough that they didn’t approach each other this way. If they wanted something, they demanded it very clearly. For example, even taking off pants to resolve pheromones.
When he left the outskirts neighborhood where poor trait-bearers lived gathered like in a detention center, people’s attitudes changed. They were refined, and at the same time, cowardly.
Those who got his number just because his face looked decent at first glance were at least honest, so Taeon could react indifferently.
But Taeon had experienced many since his school days who approached him as if offering something to him—who lacked so many elements of life—out of simple goodwill, only to ultimately covet things related to Taeon’s shell.
Familiar bitterness and disillusionment slowly rose from deep within his body.
Instinctively knowing he shouldn’t be consumed by this feeling, Taeon administered emergency treatment to shake off the depression.
It was the humming of a familiar tune that Sunjeong, who had been on Taeon’s back earlier, had sung. A self-composed humming that Sunjeong often sang but probably had no background song for.
Humming that melody seemed to improve his mood.
Right, it was studying done late after growing up anyway.
If he didn’t have it, he’d do without. The very act of looking for new tutoring or whatever might mean his current life was too abundant for Taeon.
Besides, didn’t Taeon have a reliable new tutor who attended Hanguk University?
Thinking of that teacher’s face—that pale, white, soft face—Taeon started walking again with light steps toward the neighborhood where he lived.
***
“Boss, one iced latte please. Change the milk to oat.”
“Yes, iced café latte with oat milk substitution. That’s 4,800 won.”
The regular customer who came every day always ordered as if it were the first time. Taeon also took the order as if it were the first time.
Even a miracle that appeared in daily life inevitably became daily life itself when continually encountered.
Now the “super handsome part-timer” of Café Sentence had also become close to daily life for some Hanguk University students. The number of people bulldozing to get his number like at first gradually decreased. However, according to the café’s rules, the number of students studying at the café while ordering one drink every three hours noticeably increased.
At the tables full of students that had become natural at some point, Sunjeong was rarely sitting.
Glancing around the café interior for no reason, which was completely quiet except for the very slight noise made by studying people, Taeon briefly picked up his phone.
The time was 2 PM. An awkward time to be moving.
Thinking this, he sent a message to Sunjeong and the reply came right back.
[Finished moving?]
The subject of “moving” was Jinhyeok and Yoonwoo. As Taeon felt dismayed before the message missing its subject, a reply came from Sunjeong.
[They left this morning packed all night]
[OK]
After confirming through simple conversation that Jinhyeok and Yoonwoo had left the apartment for themselves, Taeon fell into thought.
[You at school?]
[Came to school after seeing them off]
[Want to drop by Sentence? I’ll buy you a meal]
To Taeon’s words said with courage, Sunjeong didn’t reply for quite a while.
The reason he suggested eating together was because the friends who’d lived together—especially with Jinhyeok and Yoonwoo gone from the apartment—Sunjeong would probably be at least a little lonely tonight.
Taeon knew Sunjeong, who always felt a bit of loneliness in living alone even while pretending to be used to it.
[I will. I’ll go at 6]
Only after a reply finally came from Sunjeong did Taeon feel relieved.
After 5 PM passed, the footsteps of customers that had come sporadically stopped completely.
Waiting for Sunjeong who would arrive at the café around the same time as Taeon’s quitting time, Taeon searched for good restaurants near Hanguk University. He’d eaten various menus at different restaurants, but most were cheap and cost-effective places he’d eaten at with Juseong.
Since it wasn’t a date, it didn’t need to be too fancy, but it would be nice if it was a place with a moderate atmosphere.
For Taeon, unable to really tell where would be decent, he put down his phone for now.
He decided to think slowly while drinking his share of a warm café latte.
The sound of steaming was clearly audible. Taeon liked this sound. Now he could steam with his eyes closed. He wanted to try cool latte art like Juseong, but it seemed like a skill that needed proper learning, so he couldn’t bring himself to try.
Still, Taeon’s mood improved as he drank the warm latte that tasted supreme because they used good milk and good beans. If only he could live without any worries while drinking a latte like this every day.
He’d entered the new path of studying after being stimulated by watching Sunjeong study while preparing to transfer departments, but honestly there were more times when he felt overwhelmed.
If he’d entered college from twenty years old, he would have at least definitely received a scholarship.
Now even that was difficult, so he had to do everything himself.
He still had Hanguk University as his goal—the university he’d resolved to definitely attend if he could go to college during his school days—but actually Hanguk University was too much. He’d probably end up going to the place that gave the most scholarships among universities not too far from the neighborhood.
In the past, he would have said in a cynical voice, “If I’m going to such a place, I’d rather learn a skill,” but now Taeon had come to realize it undeniably.
In truth, he wanted so badly to study even if it meant going to “such a place.”
Once you realized it, there were truths that couldn’t be undone.
Like his feelings for Sunjeong.
Things that couldn’t be undone even if he tried.
