“I’ll bring the gyoza right away.”
“Thank you.”
The server left with a “enjoy your meal” and disappeared. Eorin handed me a spoon shaped like a pipe from a foreign movie.
Ramen was nothing like ramyeon. There were noodles, but they weren’t curly and the broth wasn’t red. And on top were meat that looked like sliced pork and some vegetables I didn’t recognize.
“I’ll eat well.”
I tried the broth first, and as expected, it didn’t taste like ramyeon. But it was incredibly delicious. When my eyes widened, Eorin giggled.
“Is it that good? I guess you like it, thank goodness.”
“It’s totally delicious. What is it? It’s completely different from ramyeon. What’s this?”
“It’s bamboo shoots.”
“So bamboo shoots are delicious.”
I ate the ramen, ate something called chashu rice bowl, and soon the gyoza came out too. The gyoza weren’t just ordinary dumplings either. They looked like dumplings but juices flowed out from inside.
“What is this…? It’s so delicious.”
“Eat a lot.”
Eorin pushed the gyoza toward me, but I don’t eat that much to begin with, so in the end it was Eorin who finished everything.
“The chashu rice bowl was really delicious too. I never thought I liked bean sprouts, but they were good.”
“It must have been really good.”
Something must have been on the corner of my mouth, because Eorin pulled out a tissue and wiped the corner of my mouth. The area around my eyes immediately flushed red.
“Should we go?”
“Yeah.”
When I stood up shouldering my bag that only had a few sheets of paper in it and jingled emptily, Eorin was already at the counter paying. Eorin, who received and pocketed the change, gestured to me.
“Do you know the way here?”
“Um, I always just come to eat ramen so I don’t really know. But if we walk, won’t we come across a cafe or something?”
Saying that, Eorin opened the door and started walking with me in tow.
When we entered the cafe, Eorin said he was full and tried not to order anything, so I forcibly bought cake. Eorin doesn’t like sweets that much, so the cake I brought was cheesecake. Seeing the cake in my hand, Eorin burst out laughing and talked about the cheese bread I’d given him once before.
“I really… wasn’t thinking about decreased stamina or anything like that.”
“I know. Junsu was teasing you.”
Eorin giggled. He kept laughing and it somehow felt like he was teasing me, so I furrowed my brows. It was a bit annoying.
“But you… did you really stay up all night watching porn that day?”
“No!”
His face turned a bit red when I said “porn,” but Eorin, busy denying it with a thoroughly flustered face, didn’t seem to notice. This was my first time making such a joke, and indeed people shouldn’t do things they don’t normally do. Still, it was fun watching Eorin get flustered. When I burst out laughing, Eorin laughed along. And at the end he added one more thing. I really didn’t watch it.
After chatting for a while over cake and coffee, I suddenly looked at the clock and it was already five o’clock. Even if I went back now, dinner time would be tight. Because it was summer and the days were long, I hadn’t realized so much time had passed. When I hurriedly stood up, Eorin stopped me.
“I’ll call the driver now so let’s go together. I’ll take you home.”
“No, there’s no need! It’s okay! I’ve already been such a burden.”
“You don’t know the way here, and you don’t know where to catch which bus. Taxis are expensive. Since I dragged you out here, I’ll take you home. Okay?”
Geez. I muttered that to myself. Eorin had definitely learned how to coax me. Whatever expression I was looking at Eorin with, he looked at my face and burst out laughing.
In the end, I had to sit obediently and wait for the driver to come. When I bowed repeatedly in apology when the driver returned, the driver waved his hand saying it was fine.
When I got out of the car that stopped near the orphanage, Eorin rolled down the window and waved.
“Get in safely. Thanks for today.”
“No. Thank you.”
“Supplementary classes are in 3 days, right? See you then.”
“Yeah. Get home safely. Thank you, driver.”
The car was heavily tinted so I couldn’t see inside, but thinking the driver must be watching me, I bowed in greeting. And when I waved at Eorin, he grinned and rolled up the window while still waving. After watching the car depart, I ran into the orphanage.
But when I actually entered, the atmosphere at the orphanage was unsettled. Wondering what was going on, I heard crying as I headed inside. I hurriedly walked and opened the door to the room where the crying was coming from, and saw the younger siblings and teachers gathered together. And in the middle of them were seven-year-old Chaeyoung and nine-year-old Jumin. It was Chaeyoung who was crying loudly.
“Chaeyoung-ah, why are you crying?”
“Waaaaaah.”
Chaeyoung ran to me and hugged me. I patted her heaving back and looked at Jumin, and Jumin, who had been looking back and forth between me and Chaeyoung, also started tearing up.
“……”
“What’s wrong, Jumin-ah? What happened?”
“Come on, kids. Let’s go to the cafeteria.”
Several teachers took the siblings in the room and left. Since I’d grown up, mediating when siblings fought was my role. Because they were at such a sensitive age, it took all day to reconcile two of them, and the teachers couldn’t put the day of the remaining fourteen on the back burner.
One of the teachers following at the back stopped and came to me to whisper.
“You know that outfit with the rabbit drawing that Jumin liked, it got too small and doesn’t fit Jumin anymore. But Chaeyoung spilled water on her clothes, so the outfit Chanhyeong took out to change her into happened to be that outfit. Jumin must not have wanted to give her outfit to Chaeyoung. So when Jumin got angry, Chaeyoung also got mad or something and shouted that it was tacky and she wouldn’t wear it. Then the fight gradually got bigger and they even got into a physical fight.”
Ah… I nodded. Most of the kids who came to the orphanage went through this. Coming to the orphanage inevitably meant learning to concede. Regardless of the degree of attachment. When I sat down, Chaeyoung, who had been clinging to me, also sat down. I gestured for Jumin to come too and held her hand. A moment later, when I thought Chaeyoung’s crying had subsided a bit, I quietly spoke.
“Jumin-ah, were you upset about giving your rabbit outfit to Chaeyoung?”
Jumin, who had been keeping her mouth firmly shut, nodded. I squeezed Jumin’s small hand gently.
“Oppa had that happen too.”
At my words, Chaeyoung’s head shot up. She seemed to firmly believe I would take her side. At that face filled with betrayal, I smiled. Listen, Chaeyoung-ah.
“For oppa, it wasn’t clothes but a doll, and actually I didn’t own it. Some dolls just came to the orphanage, but there weren’t enough to divide among everyone. But oppa was the oldest, so… in the end I gave them to the younger siblings. I told the teachers it was okay, but actually oppa wanted to have one too.”
“Then why did you give them away?”
“Um…”
I stroked Chaeyoung’s head. Then looking at Chaeyoung’s face, I took out a handkerchief from my pocket and wiped Chaeyoung’s face.
“I think I knew it wasn’t something oppa needed.”
Jumin blinked. Now that she’d calmed down, her anger seemed to have melted a bit.
“I don’t know if you can understand this, but that’s how it was. That doll wasn’t something oppa needed. There were younger siblings who were more scared of the night than me. If they hugged even that to sleep, now the younger siblings would sleep well at night, be less lonely, I thought.”
I picked up the clothes that had been sprawled on the floor. They were a bit wrinkled in the chaos but they were fine.
“I understand not wanting to give it. You don’t like always conceding just because you’re an older sister, right? I keep growing but my younger sibling stays a younger sibling, so it feels like my things keep getting taken, and in the end the younger sibling gets everything.”
“…Yeah.”
“But for me, rather than keeping things I don’t need, I preferred seeing my younger sibling smile when receiving it. For the younger sibling, it’s one new thing to give their heart to. And younger siblings don’t stay younger siblings forever either.”
I folded the rabbit outfit neatly and placed it in Jumin’s arms.
“Chaeyoung is also an older sister and a noona. You have lots of younger siblings. Right?”
“Yeah. I have… five.”
“Chaeyoung, you’ve given clothes and things to your younger siblings a lot too, right?”
“Yeah. Last time too, you know, I gave my purple skirt to Suyeon.”
“You liked that. But it was okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because it got too small for me so I can’t wear it anymore… And you know, Suyeon saw it before and said it was pretty… So I wanted to give it to her.”
“Chaeyoung-ah, what about the rabbit outfit?”
“It’s pretty…”
“You said this was tacky.”
“That’s a lie.”
Remembering that I’d told her several times that lying is bad, Chaeyoung kept glancing at me.
“Actually, I like it, but I got angry because unnie said she didn’t want to give it to me…”
“That’s what she said, Jumin-ah. You were also angry because she called the outfit you actually liked tacky, right?”
“Yeah…”
Jumin, who had been nodding, pondered deeply, then soon let out a small sigh. Then she held out the rabbit outfit she’d been holding to Chaeyoung.
“It’s too small for me anyway so I can’t wear it, so you wear it…”
“Really?”
“Yeah. …Do you think this is pretty too?”
“Yeah. It’s pretty. I always said it was pretty every time you wore it.”
“…Yeah.”
Jumin came to Chaeyoung and changed her clothes herself. Then she rubbed the arm that had turned red from her hitting it and apologized.
“Sorry for hitting you.”
“I’m sorry too, unnie.”
Chaeyoung hugged Jumin tightly.
“Chaeyoung-ah, do you want to go to the cafeteria first? Jumin unnie and oppa will talk a little more and then go.”
“Yeah.”
Chaeyoung, who had been rubbing the rabbit drawing a few times while smiling, left the room just like that and ran to the cafeteria. Tap-tap-tap-tap, even just hearing it, the sound of excited footsteps.
“Jumin is becoming an older sister too.”
“I was already an older sister though?”
“That’s true, but… still.”
With so many siblings, even if you grew attached to something as yours, there were many times you had to give it to a younger sibling right away. Conceding by holding back your own greed and giving your things to younger siblings was quite a mature concept, but the younger siblings had to learn and grow up with that early on. Any child with siblings would be like that, but especially so.
