Whatever the reason was, I liked everything Kkotmoa said. Everything was cute. Especially when he shrugged his shoulders and giggled—that was really cute. I know, it’s extremely subjective. That’s why I hoped it only looked that way to me. If others also found him lovable, I’d be somewhat annoyed and anxious.
Kang Junwoo yelled like a drunk person, asking what good scene he came all the way here to see. Kkotmoa and I were so embarrassed and ashamed that we quickened our steps as if we’d made a promise. We were scared someone might see us as part of Kang Junwoo’s party.
“But when did you guys make up? During lecture time, you didn’t say a single word, or when that bastard talked to you, you kept going ‘Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim,’ so who knew you’d stick together like that after it ended? And that too, leaving only me out. Ah, fuck, I feel so betrayed.”
There were already five empty soju bottles. I hadn’t drunk a single glass. I was drinking cider and moderately matching the atmosphere with the guys drinking soju. Once was enough for getting drunk and making a spectacle in front of Kkotmoa. Even if I took care of drunk Kkotmoa, I never wanted to show him my drunk state again.
I was curious what Kkotmoa would be like when drunk, but the two guys were fine even while drinking their sixth bottle. They were truly monstrous heavy drinkers. Watching that neat, white face swallow soju easily as if drinking water was something I couldn’t get used to even while watching continuously.
“Junwoo-ya, you should speak correctly. You didn’t hang out with me because you were too busy playing around with girls.”
“How funny. When I said I’d buy you food on Monday, you bailed saying you had to go to your part-time job.”
“That was just that one day. You said when I entered school, you’d hang out with me every day, give me the full course treatment or whatever, but I’m an afterthought while you’re only surrounded by girls.”
“Hey, that’s……!”
“It’s okay, I understand. I already knew anyway. Girls are more of a priority to you than friends. Everyone has different values and different priorities, so I understand. I’m just a little disappointed in you. Because I realized how shallow our friendship is.”
Kang Junwoo had an aggrieved expression but couldn’t retort. Come to think of it, even before, Kkotmoa said everything he had to say with a smiling face. Now it seemed to have upgraded a bit. How could he speak so gently like this, blocking a noisy mouth with a bright smile without raising his voice even once? However, I didn’t know that arrow would come to me, who was quietly watching Kkotmoa.
“You crazy bastard, you’re going to bore a hole through your flower at this rate! Stop staring!”
“Don’t you know it’s human psychology that your gaze keeps going to something pretty? Whatever I look at with my own eyes is my own business, so mind your own business and just drink your damn liquor.”
“……Wow, since when did you become this shameless? I really thought Do Hyeondo, who pretended not to care, pretended to be chic, pretended to be indifferent, was fucking annoying, but no. Being shameless is more fucking annoying, fuck.”
“Yeah, thanks. I just need to be a lucky guy to one person, so feel free to find me unlucky.”
“Ugh, fuck! What riches and glory am I trying to enjoy by doing this here on a golden weekend, leaving behind so many sweeties? Right, I’m the crazy one, I’m the crazy one.”
I thought it would take 40 years, but surprisingly, after 24 years, Kang Junwoo, who admitted he was crazy, tried to drink a shot glass of soju by himself in one shot. Kkotmoa quickly picked up his glass to toast, but Kang Junwoo ignored him with the word ‘fuck off’ and drank it alone in one shot. So I raised my soju glass filled with cider and clinked it against Kkotmoa’s glass.
“Yeah, Hana-ya. Oppa-ya.”
While Kkotmoa and I drank the liquid in our soju glasses, Kang Junwoo called someone. No, playing around with girls is fine and all good, but I really wish he’d stop with that ‘oppa’ sound. Every time I heard it, I got goosebumps and fierce chills as if bugs were crawling all over my body.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes. I’m surprisingly really good at drinking, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim.”
‘I’m surprisingly really capable.’
It sounded overlapped with what he’d said when we were first getting close. Since Kkotmoa had shown in various ways that he was indeed really capable, his being really good at drinking was probably also true.
What a shame, I wanted to see him drunk.
“Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim, when I was twenty, I drank soju for the first time with Daddy, you know? Because they said drinking etiquette should be learned from adults. I got scolded so much by Dad then? It was my first time drinking, but Daddy and I drank 9 bottles of soju together. We both threw up and it was chaos. The next day too, we couldn’t come to our senses and almost died. So I really got scolded a lot. But you know, sunbae-nim, Daddy said I have a soju constitution.”
Even though informal and formal speech were mixed up chaotically, the words he calmly brought out were tinged with longing and affection. I thought I wished I could drink well like Kang Junwoo. Then we could tilt our glasses together and I could listen to more of this and that.
“Eat well and live well, you weed and anchovy bastards who don’t match even as friends.”
Kang Junwoo, who finished his call, left without looking back. Unlike Kkotmoa who was dumbfounded, I wasn’t surprised since I’d been abandoned by that bastard in this way so many times. This is why home education is important. A guy who grew up being coddled with the world under his feet didn’t know how to give an apologetic greeting for leaving first and didn’t even know how to properly call his friends’ names. Kang Junwoo shouldn’t attend university for 9 semesters but should receive basic character education again from the start.
“He’s originally like that often.”
“He was never like that when he was with me though?”
“That’s…, because it’s you.”
“What’s that……”
Kkotmoa, who shook his head, gulped down soju. He really drinks well. I attempted what I couldn’t do when Kang Junwoo was here. There was samgyeopsal and additionally ordered kkeopdaegi, doenjang-jjigae, and yukhoe. I quickly picked up yukhoe and shoved it in front of Kkotmoa’s mouth. However, the guy who didn’t refuse what others gave him and opened his mouth without awkwardness to receive it well was just staring at me. Embarrassingly.
“……My arm hurts.”
“You never did this sort of thing to me originally, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim.”
“It’s not that I didn’t do it, I wanted to but couldn’t, Kkotmoa hubae-nim.”
“……”
“Why, when you readily receive what other kids give you. Hubae-nim, my arm really hurts a lot.”
“……Even so, if you do this, it’s kind of……”
Kkotmoa, who was about to say something more, hesitated for a moment then awkwardly opened his mouth. It looked like he easily fed others, but my hand surprisingly trembled. It seems I developed hand tremors that didn’t exist before.
We repeated that action without conversation. Kkotmoa poured and drank the remaining half bottle of soju, and I shoved snacks in front of his mouth as if I’d been waiting. I felt somehow proud. It looked good seeing him open his mouth as I gave him food and nibble and chew little by little. I wondered if Kang Junwoo would try to stab me with a fork if I did this when he was here, then came to the conclusion that I should just meet without Kang Junwoo from now on.
When paying, I glanced from the side and saw it came to 78,000 won. It wasn’t a lot for three guys who ate and drank, but still, it upset me that Kkotmoa was pulling out his card. On one hand, I thought Kang Junwoo must have paid when he left first, but he just left. But I seemed to know why Kang Junwoo just left. I too was standing blankly next to Kkotmoa paying for the same reason.
“I ate well.”
“Just for this? You bought dinner for our family all this week, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim.”
“……I’ll take you home.”
Changing the subject, I draped the leather jacket I brought out over Kkotmoa’s shoulders. He just glanced at me once but didn’t say anything particular. Today I was thoroughly prepared and wore a knit over my shirt, so I wasn’t very cold either.
We moved our steps together following the moonlight. Kkotmoa’s house wasn’t very far from here. It was a distance sufficient in 10 minutes on foot. It was because the flower shop, samgyeopsal restaurant, and Kang Junwoo’s villa where Kkotmoa lived were all near the school. I wondered if I should have gone a bit farther if I’d known it would be like this.
“We’re here. Here, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim.”
Kkotmoa held out the leather jacket. I want to be together a little longer, but I’m getting anxious because of Kkotmoa’s attitude of wanting to go in quickly. Is there any way? The head I’ve been racking since earlier had only one answer. Then it can’t be helped. I started acting even more awkwardly than Kang Junwoo.
“Ah, the bus stopped running.”
“You can just take a taxi, when you bragged to our Jae-a that you have a lot of money.”
“I’m usually frugal so I only use public transportation.”
Kkotmoa laughed as if it was absurd. Even I thought it was absurd. I did have a car I received as a college entrance gift, but I didn’t use it often. Especially when attending school, I didn’t want to stand out much among the kids. After meeting Kkotmoa, I never once brought out the car. In case he felt distant. And taking a taxi was more comfortable than driving in this place with a small parking lot. Also, it didn’t matter since I had a driver on 24-hour standby who would come right away when called. However, now I had to consider it a situation where it didn’t matter but it mattered.
“It’s also kind of dangerous to take a taxi alone at night.”
“I don’t think anyone would kidnap you, Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim. And you’re good at fighting too.”
“What use is all that when the opponent might have a weapon?”
I don’t know what I’m saying right now. If I’m talking this much nonsense while completely sober without a drop of alcohol, I can be considered drunk. Anyway, I seemed to have made some excuses or justifications, so now it was time to bring up the main point.
“I’m really scared to take a taxi alone so……”
“……”
“Let me sleep over.”
Today was the day Kkotmoa’s house was empty. It was certain since Samyukshippal said he was sleeping at his aunt’s house. Kkotmoa narrowed his eyes and looked at me with suspicious eyes.
“……Do Hyeondo sunbae-nim, you said you have interest, ulterior motives, and what else was it……”
“Dark intentions.”
“Right, dark intentions toward me.”
“That’s why I’m asking you to let me sleep over.”
“Are you stupid? Why would I trust and let such a guy sleep over?”
“……Trust my sincerity.”
Even I thought it was a shameless answer. Then and now, I was still pulling tricks on Kkotmoa.
Kkotmoa didn’t particularly answer and first turned his back and entered the villa. Without time to hesitate, I quickly followed behind him. Watching him calmly press the entrance password, I knew it was permission.
However, I had absolutely no intention of doing anything to Kkotmoa. No, my heart wanted to hold at least his hand by making that ridiculous God of Study excuse like before, but now there was no excuse to make. Also, I hadn’t even confessed yet, and I didn’t want to hurt him or ruin the relationship by acting hastily. Since I decided to properly win Kkotmoa’s heart, I vowed never to do anything like a punk.
