The process of learning to fish for the first time at the lakeside was enjoyable. The voice that meticulously explained each unfamiliar tool one by one and taught him how to use them was careful, and it was fascinating how much he knew about various things.
Everything went smoothly until they gathered the items and sat on folding chairs to start fishing. Threading bait onto the fishhook was a bit gross and didn’t smell great, but wearing work gloves and trying new things one by one in order was fun. It was even more so because he hadn’t experienced these things outside of acting.
Even if nothing was caught, the time spent sitting by the water, blankly staring at the fragments of light reflecting on the calm lake surface while concentrating was comfortable. Dowon didn’t disturb Muyoung in such moments and didn’t grow anxious either.
But at some point, a blind fish got caught on Muyoung’s fishing rod. When he watched the crucian carp being pulled up on the fishing line while Dowon helped the flustered Muyoung from behind, it felt like he was doing the most fun thing in the world. It didn’t seem like he had worked hard at anything, but when a fish was actually caught on the fishing rod that suddenly became heavy, he got excited. So he unnecessarily asked Dowon more questions and tried changing the float… Anyway, getting excited like never before was a mistake.
‘Be careful. It’s easy to slip by the water.’
‘I’m fine. I’ll be careful.’
Being too excited, he smiled and replied casually while listening. Dowon also praised him tremendously while watching him like that. Saying it wasn’t easy to catch fish like that on a first visit. He might have gotten more excited because it had been so long since he’d been this thrilled.
After bustling about like that for a while, moving around to release the caught fish was the problem. He should have just listened to Dowon who said to release them all together when going back. Going close to the water and tipping over the container with the fish, he misstepped and lost his balance. If he had known he’d get all wet, he would have sat still. No, if he had been told in advance they were coming to a place like this, he would have refrained from wearing bright-colored clothes. Though it wasn’t really Dowon’s fault, the resentment with nowhere to go started finding fault in this way.
Sitting in the folding chair, scanning the items in front of him one by one, Muyoung buried his face deeply between his damp knees. The wet clothes bothered him, but fortunately since it was summer, it wasn’t cold enough to chill his body. He thought he had been careful enough, but he didn’t know how he had caused such an accident.
Even while fiddling with the towel he’d used to wipe off the moisture, he glanced at Dowon moving busily. All the unfamiliar tools seemed to be prepared to torment him. Of course, Dowon, the very person who brought him here, surely didn’t have such intentions.
‘I don’t go often, but there’s a good place to spend time leisurely.’
‘Did you used to go to places like this alone?’
‘It’s a place I originally went to alone, but I’m telling you about it because it’s you, Muyoung-ssi.’
He should have anticipated it from the conversation they exchanged intermittently while traveling by car. He had been uneasy about the way Dowon smiled and replied to his casual questions. He should have just said not to go far back then. He didn’t know why he came all the way here.
“Are you okay?”
“…Yes.”
Actually, Dowon hadn’t done anything wrong. The truth was, the lake he visited for the first time was too beautiful, and throughout their walk around the area, he felt elated with a sense of liberation. Since they’d come this far, when asked if he’d like to try fishing, thinking how hard could it be, he boldly agreed—that was the mistake. Right, the accident was mine.
“I’m sorry…”
“I’m just glad you didn’t get hurt. It’s quite dangerous, so if you had fallen wrong, it would have been serious. I wouldn’t have the face to see you either.”
“What did you do, CEO-nim…”
“I’m the one who brought you here, aren’t I.”
He knew that if they started assigning blame like that, there would be no end to it. The fact that falling in the water and Dowon bringing him here weren’t really problems—he understood that much. His head did, at least. But Dowon’s words weren’t very comforting. Though his mistake wasn’t intentional, he felt like he had ruined this time on his own.
Whether his expression showed his attempt not to be gloomy, after finishing organizing the items and sitting across from him, Dowon firmly grasped his hand.
“There’s a villa nearby. Actually, today I was planning to take a leisurely walk and have something delicious for dinner before taking you home. But it’s hard to move like this and it’ll be tough, so how about we go there, wash up, and rest comfortably before leaving?”
“…That’s too much.”
“Your expression isn’t good right now, Muyoung-ssi, and it’ll get colder when the sun sets, so it’s hard for me to watch. It’s sort of our first date, so I’d be really grateful if you’d follow along so we don’t ruin it like this.”
“Ruin it… I’m the one who misstepped and fell in the water.”
“Just because there was a bit of an accident while having fun doesn’t mean the enjoyment disappears, and right now I’m worried about you too.”
He felt a little relieved to know he wasn’t the only one being mindful of the ruined time and this situation. At the same time, he didn’t want to make Dowon worry about things like this unnecessarily, and he regretted that just moments ago they were both leisurely enjoying their time. Muyoung glanced and observed Dowon’s complexion.
“Actually, it’s an excuse.”
“…Pardon?”
“I just don’t want to send you back right away.”
A face with a gentle smile waited for Muyoung’s answer.
“…Understood. Let’s go there for now.”
“Thank you. Then sit for a moment. Even if it’s hot, keep this on.”
As if he looked quite cold, Dowon wrapped a thin blanket around Muyoung’s back. Muyoung silently nodded and crouched down again, looking at the ground. Listening to the sound of footsteps moving away while sitting still, he became troubled again. If he got in the car like this, he’d wet the seats and floor. Even knowing it was a needless worry, he worried again.
#04
Afterimage
He knew his tiresome personality of dwelling on a mistake for quite a long time once he made one. But it wasn’t something easily fixed. It would be nice if doing so reduced his mistakes, but he shouldn’t make situations where he’d make mistakes in the first place. The feeling that he should be the one to change in the end didn’t diminish.
Constantly reviewing even small mistakes was a bad habit. Occasionally when criticized, he’d think he should fix it, but that too was only for a moment. Once it actually happened, he’d become dejected like this and keep ruminating… Muyoung deeply sighed while pressing the soaked ground firmly with the tip of his shoe.
“Now, let’s hurry to the car.”
“…Yes.”
After neatly returning the rented items, he walked after the man who came to find him toward the parked car. The stride walking ahead in big steps was resolute and wide.
He thought that whatever Han Dowon did, it would probably resemble that gait exactly. Unhesitating in decisions and never making mistakes. Even if he rarely made a mistake, he was someone with sufficient countermeasures to respond. He was the kind of person who occasionally showed Muyoung a kind face but was probably a different person at the company.
In the car, a blanket of a different color was spread on the passenger seat—when had he laid it out. It was clear that Dowon had been thoughtful so they could get to the villa he said was close without discomfort.
“The caretaker says he’ll have things ready, so wash up first when we arrive. If you soak in hot water for a while and come out, you should be fine.”
“I’m sorry for being troublesome.”
“I should hear those words after truly troublesome things, but this is nothing, so don’t feel burdened.”
To Dowon who spoke resolutely with a smiling face, he nodded and slowly closed and opened his eyes in the departing car. Though he was bothered by the wet and dirty clothes, the road bathed in the red light of sunset blended well with the green forest and was good to watch through the window. Thanks to the setting sun all the way to the villa, he captured the changing colors of the scenery entirely with his eyes.
The villa was really well-decorated. Contrary to what he’d said about it not being big or luxurious, it was a place with quite a spacious living room and kitchen. While Muyoung was just looking around at the unfamiliar space, Dowon, who had him wait for a moment, brought out clothes to change into from somewhere and handed them over.
“Soak thoroughly and stay warm. Let’s have dinner together after that.”
“Th-these clothes…”
“They’re comfortable clothes, so wash up, change, and come out. If you leave your clothes, they can probably be laundered by tomorrow.”
“Thank you…”
He obediently took the clothes and entered the bathroom. Because he hurried, he didn’t see rooms other than the bathroom, but he could tell the villa was thoroughly well-decorated. The bathroom with high ceilings and appropriate size was even equipped with a clean bathtub, leaving nothing to be desired. After taking off the dirty clothes and dipping his feet in the warm water already drawn in the bathtub, only after submerging up to his neck did the tension clinging to his body relax comfortably.
Then Dowon knocked on the bathroom door and called for Muyoung.
“Muyoung-ssi, are you okay?”
“Ah, yes. I’m fine. I’ll be out soon.”
“If there’s anything uncomfortable, let me know. I’ll go wash up somewhere else too.”
It seemed he was giving notice in case Muyoung would be startled if he came out and no one was there. He could feel that Dowon was paying attention to many aspects of him who kept floundering. Patting his wet cheeks with his hands, he awakened his dazed mind. The outing had changed a lot from what he’d thought, but he couldn’t keep spacing out.
Still, after soaking his body for a while and coming out, the chill that had settled in his body dissipated and his tense muscles relaxed, so his mood had improved somewhat. The prepared clothes were training pants good for moving around the house and a white short-sleeved t-shirt. Whether they were Dowon’s clothes, they were generous in fit.
After looking around briefly, he approached the kitchen. The closer he got, the more delicious smells wafted over. Had he been cooking directly? Then Dowon, sensing a presence, turned around.
