While the call continued, my mouth suddenly felt bored. Come to think of it, hyung-nim said he’d bought snacks for the car.
While I was at it, I immediately opened the glove box in front of the passenger seat.
“……Oh!”
Then welcome snacks came into view. There were even the jellies I’d eaten before when I was curious about kissing.
Of course, hyung-nim doesn’t know that reason. It seemed he just thought I liked them after seeing me holding these jellies back then.
– But lately, I keep getting logged out sometimes. Was I hacked? Does that happen to you?
“Huh? Why is that? That’s never happened to me.”
Should I try the jelly again? Honestly, even the memory of kissing is fading now…….
I had snacked at the cafe until just moments ago, but I couldn’t contain my curiosity. I immediately opened a jelly and put it in my mouth.
The jelly that still tasted like strawberries was sweet, and the plump texture of the jelly seemed similar to actual kissing but was also completely different.
What the. As I kept rolling it around in my mouth, it wasn’t similar at all. It couldn’t even compare to kissing with hyung-nim. Kissing with hyung-nim was much softer and felt better. Not to mention the sweetness.
– Come to think of it, is it okay living with my hyung? If it were me, I wouldn’t even want to imagine it. Ugh. I feel like he’d nag and control everything.
“There are times like that, but I think it’s oka……”
It was the moment hyung-nim was mentioned. The driver’s side door opened and hyung-nim got in the car.
Huh! Both the fact that I had jelly in my mouth while thinking about kissing hyung-nim, and the flustered feeling like I’d been caught badmouthing him made my body jolt involuntarily.
I felt hyung-nim’s gaze, and I still had the kiss jelly in one cheek.
As a result, my shifty eyes naturally turned toward hyung-nim’s lips.
But why was that? Hyung-nim’s gaze was also directed at my lips exactly the same way.
At the prolonged eye contact, I unconsciously gulped and chewed the jelly in my mouth. Hyung-nim took in every movement of my lips without missing a thing.
At the strangely ticklish feeling inside, I awkwardly averted my gaze.
Despite the unnatural movement, hyung-nim didn’t say anything in particular, and after noticing I was on a call with Jeongyeon, he instead gestured lightly for me to talk comfortably.
– Come home early, only drink alcohol until you can control your body, anyone who can’t do that is an ignorant fool who doesn’t deserve to put alcohol in their mouth. He’ll probably say stuff like that all the time. Because he actually said that to me?
Jeongyeon’s words scattered. All my attention was focused on hyung-nim. After getting in the car, hyung-nim quickly looked over my outfit and moved his lips.
‘Aren’t you cold?’
In my thin jacket, the inside of the car that had been parked the whole time did feel a bit cold.
‘I’m okay.’
I shook my head while answering in the same way, only with lip movements. A smile spread across my lips without me knowing.
Even though I said I was okay, hyung-nim turned on the engine and operated the heater first. After that, the car smoothly exited the parking lot and drove on the road.
Jeongyeon poured out his grievances one after another about the nagging he’d heard, and seemed to get increasingly heated, continuing to spill words like a waterfall with no room to interrupt.
– If you don’t have a part-time job but have the brains to get below a B+ in your major, you’re not qualified to attend university paying millions of won in tuition. If that happens, I’ll cut off your allowance immediately. I’d have to hear such old-fashioned talk every single day, if it were me, I absolutely couldn’t live together.
I pressed the call volume button once more, which I’d already turned down as much as possible.
Then hyung-nim’s gaze while driving turned to my hand holding the jelly bag. I reflexively held out the bag to hyung-nim.
But instead of moving his hand, hyung-nim opened his mouth, going “Ah.”
Huh……?
I opened my eyes wide. My lips, which had been chewing the jelly, also stopped moving.
Even though I stared at hyung-nim frozen like ice, there was no change in hyung-nim’s expression. It was a natural face as if making a perfectly reasonable request.
Jeongwoo hyung-nim is asking me to feed him jelly.
– When I asked if he was nagging me in advance because he thought I’d become that kind of fool, he said it was meaningless talk. He said not to feel guilty if it doesn’t apply. Have you ever seen our hyung say or do things without any intention?
“Ah, no……”
When I stammered, hyung-nim silently moved his lips again. Toward hyung-nim asking ‘Why?’, I quickly shook my head.
Why? Well, because he’s driving, that’s why. This is something that could totally happen. It’s not a big deal at all. Since he’s driving, it’s naturally an action with no other intention.
– Right, if it’s our hyung, he probably said it thinking I’d be like that. But can’t I live a little thoughtlessly? Does everyone have to be smart like him and live under thorough calculations all the time?
I swallowed my dry saliva to regain my composure and picked up a jelly with trembling hands. Beyond the phone, Jeongyeon’s complaints continued.
When I carefully offered the jelly, hyung-nim gazed at my hand with lowered eyes, and soon his lips touched my fingertips.
It felt like an intense electric current ran through my hand. The moment my hand trembled and pulled away, hyung-nim’s eyebrow twitched.
Oops.
I came to my senses again. Shortly after, the plump red jelly, as if made to target the tongue, entered hyung-nim’s mouth.
I swallowed my dry saliva again without realizing it.
Although I agreed with Jeongyeon, just because it’s hyung-nim doesn’t mean he only acts in calculated ways. I know that. I like hyung-nim’s kindness and maturity more than anyone, and the intimacy he shows once in a while like now. There were times when the seemingly cold hyung-nim at first glance showed a human side.
– That’s what I actually heard the day before I first left for the dorm. Does that make sense? Is that something to say to a kid who’s excited about just starting college? Doesn’t he do that to you?
“Ah, no, not to me at all……”
I cautiously glanced at hyung-nim. And my eyes widened once more.
‘It’s delicious.’
This time too, only his mouth moved without sound. From earlier, the fact that hyung-nim kept talking to me soundlessly felt strange.
It felt like I was playing a secret game with hyung-nim without Jeongyeon knowing.
– He’ll probably make my curfew 9 o’clock immediately if I get a lover! It was originally 10 o’clock. Well, he probably won’t do that much to you. You’re originally an angel to our hyung anyway.
Still, perhaps because I wasn’t really chiming in much, fortunately Jeongyeon didn’t bring up hyung-nim’s story anymore after that.
I withdrew my hand and deliberately stared straight ahead, taking my eyes off hyung-nim. I focused on Jeongyeon’s voice to calm my pounding heart.
– Hey, come visit our school once before finals or during vacation. I’ll introduce you to my friends. They all saw the video so they’ll be really happy to see you? Actually, I already bragged about you.
“Uh, okay, got it. I’ll come visit.”
My awkwardly clenched hand was on my knee. The sensation remaining on my fingertips where his lips touched still felt unfamiliar.
– Hey, instead of that, want to go on a group blind date? Our department does a ton of group dates these days. You already have a lot of people wanting to go on blind dates with you, right?
“Group date? Uh, that’s true, but I’m not really……”
“Yoo Jeongyeon.”
And that was when it happened. Hyung-nim’s voice cut in without warning.
“Who are you telling to come visit right now? You should be thinking about coming here yourself. You only contact me when your allowance runs out, you—”
Click. The call ended immediately. Of course, it was cut off from Jeongyeon’s side, not mine.
“Too much talking. It’s noisy when I’m eating jelly.”
“Uh…… Did you do that on purpose? So he’d hang up?”
Surprised, I burst out laughing belatedly. Hyung-nim must have known Jeongyeon would hang up right away.
“The jelly is too sweet.”
Hyung-nim is really shameless too. Instead of answering, he takes issue with the jelly.
“Are there kids at school asking you to go on group dates too? After going to the MT, Hajin’s gotten way too popular.”
“Ah, that’s true, but I’m going to refuse them all.”
“Why? That’s something you can only do then.”
As if interested, hyung-nim’s eyebrow raised.
“Well, I told you I went on stage for the talent show. Maybe because I stood out too much at the MT, there seem to be people at school who think badly of me too. I’m not certain but……. So I’m just going to study quietly for a while.”
After the MT, throughout the midterm period, the atmosphere of the friends and seniors around me had changed somehow.
“It’s nothing big……. My friends say this kind of thing happens when you stand out. I didn’t know.”
As Choi Jihwan had said before, ‘standing out’ seemed to come with various things. It was still a subtle difference that only I felt, though.
Then hyung-nim said decisively.
“Sue them.”
“What?”
“Let’s prepare together and file a lawsuit.”
I turned to the side blankly with jelly in my mouth.
