“Not paying attention?”
Cheon Jaerim frowned looking at me thinking other thoughts. As if to signal his mood was twisting, he pounded in very tightly and forcefully. Every time he pounded hard at once, I felt the area around my lower abdomen becoming uncomfortable. So I fumbled that area and made nasal sounds.
“Ah, fuck. Can you feel it there? It going back and forth? Huh? Ah, where, this kind of…”
“Ah! Nngh, ahh! Sl-slowly!”
“My thing being big feels good, right? Huh? Put your hands down.”
“Hahh! Ngh! Ah!”
Cheon Jaerim, watching me cradle my lower abdomen with both hands, grabbed one ankle and spread it widely to the side. The cock that had been between my narrowed buttocks came in spreading its wings. He pushed his thing in to the root deep enough that I could feel Cheon Jaerim’s pubic hair passing smoothly over my groin.
My legs spread embarrassingly wide. Cheon Jaerim’s hands each held my ankles in place. What filled me rubbed here and there, moving skillfully. Cheon Jaerim smoothly rotated his pelvis in circles. When the thick pillar of his cock rotated inside the sensitive hole, my waist that had been stuck to the floor lifted up. My buttocks left the floor and rose slightly onto Cheon Jaerim’s knees. Every time Cheon Jaerim moved, the inside of the hole heated up hotly as if red pepper powder had been sprinkled.
“I can tell you like it when I rub it like this.”
“Nngh, ah! You’re cra-ah! What do I do!”
“Look at you rolling your eyes back again.”
I grabbed Cheon Jaerim’s arm that was deliberately rubbing other places and raised my head. The pillar of fire pulling out making squishy sounds was glimpsed between my legs. As much as the cock that disappeared from view and pulled out, I could feel the hole gaping open. Hueuk, I inhaled and tilted my head back. Hot breath touched my nape and fell away. Before I could straighten my head, Cheon Jaerim picked up speed and started pounding in madly. ‘Bang!’ my body was pushed up. Every time a ‘Bang! Thud!’ sound of raw flesh colliding came, it rang thrillingly like a long-awaited iron skewer finding a water vein.
“Ngh! Ahng! Ah! Nngh! Ah! Ah, ahh!”
Cheon Jaerim poked with his finger near my lower abdomen that bulged out every time his cock rapidly thrust in and pulled out. Ahh! The deeper it went in, it felt like even the fine hairs stood up in a line.
“What’s this? Are you pregnant? Did you already get pregnant with my baby?”
“Ugh! Ngh! Hahng, nngh, ah, no! Don’t poke, ngh!”
“I guess you have a body that gets pregnant easily.”
The hand trapping my ankles came down behind my knees. The hand grabbing the back of my knees pushed up straight. I heard the sound mocking me again but couldn’t point it out. I felt like I’d go crazy. My thighs touched my chest and my lower body folded like a flip phone. In that state when it went ‘Bang!’ my body froze. Stiffening from my toes to the crown of my head, I even heard the hallucination of a crackling sound. I breathed intermittently.
The ominous cock dug in before my eyes, going swoosh, in and out, stretching my hole. I made a thin crying sound and grabbed onto Cheon Jaerim’s shoulders coming down as if covering my body. Cheon Jaerim, who came down keeping his head as it was, brought his nose to my nostril. Then he whispered affectionately as if treating a beloved lover.
“It’s lonely alone, so won’t you give birth to twins?”
“Hngh, ngh, don’t, I hate it, hngh, hate it! Ahng!”
My body was split in two with my knees touching my ears. Successive sounds came out like dipping feet in and pulling out of squishy tidal flats. If my appearance were featured in Animal Kingdom, I’d be a small animal impaled on sharp fangs and spurting blood.
***
I showered and put on a robe. Water dripped from my roughly dried hair. I approached the source that had been glaring at me since earlier. I pulled the handle. It was locked. It was locked because there was something to hide. There were too many places to hide lenses. The model assemblies that were almost achromatic showed off their sleek appearance for toys.
I need to unlock the display case first. Listening to the sound of water hitting the bathroom floor, I rummaged through drawers here and there. Every time a drawer opened, an old wood smell came out. Inside, items were neatly organized. Scratching my lips swollen from water, I sped up my movements. When I opened the very last drawer, I could see key bundles gathered in a round cylindrical container. Things like car keys and small diary keys were also mixed in. I inserted my finger to the bottom of the container and pulled up a very small key ring. Like the locker padlock at the back of the classroom when I was young, it was very small. I fitted it into the keyhole outside the glass display case. It fit perfectly like a needle and thread. The key that went in smoothly opened with a cheerful click sound. It turned smoothly.
First priority was the robot. Next was the airplane. After that was the helicopter. The exterior with multiple windows didn’t look ordinary. If it was attached to something like this, it was definitely a small camera the size of a pinky fingernail. To grasp the whole picture, I looked closely at even the small nano blocks fallen in the corner. In doing so, I didn’t hear the sound of the bathroom entrance opening, spewing thick steam. It was when I was about to reach for the nano block smiling with thick red lips. A hot body just out of the shower overlapped. The white robe couldn’t block that energy. I froze like a rock, and my mouth opened like the drawers open beside me.
“Don’t tell me you’re looking for a camera? I don’t have that hobby.”
“……”
“I’m hurt. Making such a fuss over a little joke.”
“……”
“At least it wouldn’t be unfair if I really did that.”
Then, I noticed an old car model in the very front corner. The old-looking car had headlights smaller than its body. I noticed that part looked especially black. When I moved, I witnessed very slight but persistent movement that you could notice if you stared tenaciously. I quickly reached out to grab that car. But a bizarre phenomenon occurred. Far from getting closer, the distance from the car widened. Cheon Jaerim was gently backing up with his arm around my upper body. The glass door closed roughly. And it locked with a cheerful sound. Cheon Jaerim, who’d lightly obtained the key, turned my body.
“That’s it, the camera.”
“Who knows.”
“What are you going to do filming things like that? I don’t have anything. So even if you threaten me, I can’t give you anything.”
“Hyung.”
“……”
“I still have a lot of things I want to do with hyung. Don’t worry.”
***
Six digits of ‘0’ filled the blank in my bankbook every month. Every time I looked at the dense numbers, fierce waves surged in my chest. I wondered if the incoming money was proportional to my labor. The scholarship I should receive next semester was no longer a carrot before my eyes. The amount grew larger than expected. I could only surmise that this was what Cheon Jaerim meant when he first said he’d let me live comfortably. Besides the basic tutoring fee that came in, there was something additional. When I mingled bodies with Cheon Jaerim, the amount doubled like gold coins under a spell.
My body decayed but mental stability came. Mentally I was in pain but outwardly I became abundant. The method that brought leisure to my life was a method I’d never thought of at all. Like a deer caught in a trap, I couldn’t escape this life. I was scared, afraid, and sometimes comfortable. The key that guy held as my weakness came to mind from time to time. That was shackles to me. Every time I felt myself settling into this life, I thought of that. Simply, the reason I didn’t escape was… just because that was caught. That existence also presented me with defensive emotions.
Cheon Jaerim was satisfied watching me move according to his words. I sometimes sprawled in front of the glass case and glared at the keyhole as small as a pinky fingernail. Then I stroked the innocent glass with my hand like a teapot. If a genie suddenly popped out and gave me the right to choose a superpower, I would choose without hesitation a laser that could burn things just with my gaze. However, even if I possessed a laser shooting from my eyes, could I purely split that gap? I would be placed at a crossroads of whether I could return to my former festering life instead of choosing freedom.
When I wrestled in front of the glass case, Cheon Jaerim quietly approached from behind. It was a signal to give up. Cheon Jaerim was quiet and nimble. I got caught before I even noticed.
When having relations in that room where history was made, I sometimes felt anguished. My whole body stung. It felt like numerous camera lenses were raising their antennae toward me. I turned my head to the side to avoid the silent audience. Each time, Cheon Jaerim provoked me. He acted like someone deliberately trying to capture a better angle. Then I could only take one action. I had no choice but to cling to Cheon Jaerim’s body and hide my face and body. When I clung, the momentum of the cock digging below became even more vigorous. It grew like a plant that sprouts when given affection and found moist places.
I was starting to become accustomed to Cheon Jaerim’s unrestrained words. If you take medicine, you build resistance, but if you listen to words, you build resistance too. Later, I clenched my fist and tore at the flesh of my palm while looking at my cock twitching as I heard such words.
Tutoring was no longer the main thing. Contact became frequent. I acted without complaint. As I said, until I grasped the fire in the furnace gripping my ankle, I was no different from a hostage subordinate to him.
Very occasionally, I suffered nightmares of my video being distributed and circulating. Waking up in cold sweat at dawn was an unpleasant thing. After waking like that, I watched the reddening dawn and fell asleep again. After having that dream, when I stood in front of the glass case, my insides rotted. Like the double-sided colored paper used in art class. I need black, but it’s a waste to throw away the bright color on the other side. Like that, I wavered one sheet of colored paper and agonized for dozens of minutes. Then when my eyes met the stiff robot, I felt disgusted with my duplicitous self. And I wanted to smash the hard mouth of that lump of iron and stick it in Cheon Jaerim’s face. Just endure a little and run away. Before I leave, I’ll smash that glass case.
But the destination is the starting point. Since things have come to this anyway, what’s wrong with seeing it through to the end? As others say, how much blood and tears did this orphan bastard with nothing shed to endure and come this far? On my thighs, there were still marks from stabbing myself with a mechanical pencil while studying.
I learned why rich people have a relaxed mind. When relaxation comes, your perspective broadens. The first step is grades. I no longer stake everything on grades. I’ve saved up enough for next semester’s tuition. And there’s still plenty left. I’m not afraid of the monthly rent for the room that fills with water every rainy season. Instead of cup noodles, I opened the doors of franchise restaurants more frequently. I didn’t have an emaciated face. I participated more actively in department events. Because participating in events allowed me to postpone appointments with Cheon Jaerim.
“We meet everywhere.”
When I avoided Cheon Jaerim’s contact repeatedly, he crossed into my enclosure. Looking up, Cheon Jaerim was approaching me with coffee. I was working on an assignment with juniors near school. We’d decided to have chicken and beer after finishing the assignment. The juniors beside me hurriedly put away their major textbooks. Cheon Jaerim naturally sat down, putting coffee on the emptied desk. The kid next to me, seeing him for the first time, said brazenly “You’re incredibly handsome.”
Cheon Jaerim naturally mingled with the group I was sitting with. Excluding me, they were all the friendliest people. Cheon Jaerim, who’d crossed into my enclosure, was only meeting me for the first time. I kept my place blankly like a person seeing Cheon Jaerim for the first time. Instead, all my nerves focused across from me. My juniors showed smiles rarely seen at school.
I’ve never seen such bright expressions. Thinking this, I examined Cheon Jaerim’s outfit. I was checking if he’d brought the perverted video of me in his jacket pocket. If his mood was hurt because I ignored his contact, he was definitely a guy who could threaten me. I was in a state where I flinched just seeing someone else’s USB or avoided places just seeing a round camera lens, so it was all the more so. Even when Cheon Jaerim just put his hand in his pocket to put in his wallet, my pupils shook. I trembled as if a small earthquake was occurring.
“Sunbae, are you cold?”
“Oppa, you must have caught a cold.”
“You should’ve eaten something warm with me!”
“Did you drink something iced?”
“……”
“We’re all drinking warm things, but Sunjo oppa always drinks only cold drinks. Says he hates waiting for it to cool.”
I wished they would stop talking about me. But others seemed to think a bit differently. They wanted to exchange even one more word with Cheon Jaerim, so they wanted to continue the conversation using me as a medium.
How did you get to know Sunjo oppa? What’s your relationship? Have you been to the military? I’m going in soon, and I’m going to get delicious food from Sunjo hyung then. See you then. Sunjo oppa and… Sunjo, Sunjo, Sunjo!
