“When the mortal becomes immortal, when an existence that lived eternally through natural order mutates into agelessness and deathlessness. You know how they were destroyed. You and I both. Even if they enter our domain, those beings are ‘life.’ They must not become existences of ‘fate.’ In the end, they won’t understand this world to the very end, and they’ll fail to adapt and self-destruct.”
I don’t remember many humans. It can’t be helped. Humans at a level that can communicate with me have achieved so-called ‘transcendence.’ Those who surpassed their limits and lost their natural order. They’re that kind of thing.
“Phellos self-immolated for the sake of a new hero. Lamga felt disillusioned with his own kind and left for Eternity. Rust… ultimately crumbled to ennui and threw himself into hell.”
Even those few humans all had poor endings without exception.
Even beings like us go mad if they grow old enough. You can tell just by looking at this garden. The gardener left, the first was driven out. The second had his legs severed. The third lost his heart. The first tree I loved withered and died.
“I think what you saw wasn’t so different. You said so before. Think about what happened to your old friend who was happy becoming an ageless and deathless vampire.”
“Todo… crawled into the Pantheon on his own and set himself on fire. It took too long to annihilate, so he had to burn for three months.”
“I don’t want to see Raha self-destruct in such a state.”
Perhaps we’re not so different from humans either. I suddenly thought that. But humans are overwhelmingly more fragile than us. They’ll meet their end much sooner.
“Raha is a pretty child. He shouldn’t become like that.”
Havi said nothing more. I’ve already made my decision and have no intention of reversing it. No matter how much Havi tries to persuade me, it won’t change.
“If only he’d been just a little, just a little less pretty, I wouldn’t have had this dilemma.”
To put it bluntly, what do I care about the suffering and destruction experienced when the mortal mutates into the immortal? Isn’t that also fate in the end? Though there exist some pitiful things that couldn’t choose for themselves, Raha wants it himself. I can simply grant that wish.
If I do that, I’ll live cherishing Raha for a time close to eternity, until this damned garden’s destruction. Maybe he’ll self-destruct on his own, but that’s all. It would be simple if I just left it alone.
But regrettably, I don’t want to do that now. I sincerely wish for this child’s happiness. No, even if happiness is too much, I hope he makes a choice that isn’t painful.
“Havi, take those fruits on your way back.”
“…I prefer honey. Fruit has to be eaten right away.”
“You’ve eaten too much honey. Those things need something to eat too.”
Havi grumbled, but still obediently gathered the fruit and went back.
***
Winter came. I held the sleeping Raha and descended all the way to the bottom of that deep abyss. I went down endlessly, recklessly. It’s been a long time since I came down in person.
Raha endured well. Well, anyway he received my power, and since I’m protecting him, it’s natural.
Like that, I met the ‘Nightmare-Eating Whale.’
It seems to have grown even larger in the meantime. Now I can’t even gauge how big it is. It looked at me with eyes larger than my true form. It asked why I came, so I answered obediently.
—This child, turn back his memory’s spring.
—…Now you’re making me do all sorts of things.
—I’ll cut off my horn for you.
—…You’ll give me a horn just for turning back a spring a little?
My choice probably can’t be considered excellent. But I couldn’t think of any other method right now.
Anyway, Raha holds my power and is on the verge of exceeding human specifications. I couldn’t even erase Miros’s memory that was only brushed by traces of my power, so naturally I can’t touch Raha’s case. I could just pretend not to know, wipe it all clean and withdraw the power, but then Raha would die.
Then, let’s just turn back the memory’s spring a little. Then he won’t even remember me, and there’ll be no need to take away the power. And new memories will continue.
Raha will have never loved me. Will have never gone mad. The pain will be gone too. Everything will become as if it never happened. At least for Raha himself. Literally pulling it back and turning it, you see. Time continues to flow, so different memories will form while pulled back. The split memories will connect like that.
At my words, its eyes rolled around. The huge pupils seemed about to overflow with light, they were so full.
—I’ve seen all the crazy things in the world, but I didn’t think you’d go crazy too.
—Maybe so. This probably isn’t something I’m doing in my right mind.
—I don’t need the horn. It’s too much to receive for just turning back a human’s memory spring.
Its eyes creaked and moved. The gaze dropped down slightly.
—But this is clearly a ‘miracle’ too. You’ll have to cut off at least one arm. Is that okay?
—That’s a smaller request than I expected.
—You’re not doing this because you lack power. You’re doing it because you’re afraid this will break.
Accurate. This is what’s good about old things. There’s no need to chatter on and on. I briefly set Raha down on the spot and grabbed and tore off my left arm. With a creepy cracking sound, fragments scattered wildly. It and I just watched. Then it received and devoured my arm.
I don’t even know where or what part is its mouth. What has become excessively huge has now reached the point where nothing can be gauged. What is this thing thinking as it swims in this terrible darkness? It’s too big now to even come up. Well, that doesn’t matter anyway.
The crunching sound soon subsided. Its eyes still glitter. And with a single creak, everything was finished. The Nightmare-Eating Whale looked down at Raha and said indifferently,
—Send him as far away as possible. If you keep him in your nest and he resonates and the spring unwinds, that’ll be troublesome.
—Thank you.
—Don’t forget. Paradise has fallen, Eternity has been isolated. We’re the same.
—I know.
—No, you still don’t know. Hurry up and acknowledge it. If you don’t realize it, it’ll be catastrophe.
Really. It grumbled at me while blinking its eyes, then just closed them. I stared blankly at its endlessly continuing line, then climbed back up toward my nest.
***
Raha is still asleep. Because winter hasn’t ended yet, and because I haven’t woken him. So, it had to be now. It’s time to return Raha to the human world.
—The stench of burning is everywhere.
—Let’s hurry back.
—You’re not going back. You have to protect Raha.
The Dryads who followed me urged to quickly return to the nest.
—What? We have to protect that pretty thing?
—Humans can’t be trusted. Seeing this state makes it even more so.
—It’s too stuffy here, do we have to stay?
—Take turns being here every winter. Raha is fragile, you know.
—…Really, what a helpless human. We have to protect him, I guess.
The Dryads grumbled, but fortunately agreed.
To that extent, the human world was a mess. Somehow it seems they still haven’t stopped fighting. They kept fighting each other continuously. Why? Recently it was fine. It couldn’t have been short on resources like before, like when I sent Miros, so I don’t know why they’re still fighting.
Even fighting this fiercely, they didn’t come near the forest at all, so they’re impressive in many ways. To the extent that I didn’t know about the commotion, they were fighting very thoroughly only in their own territory. Before, when fights broke out between them, the forest was always the first to get noisy.
Since Hadika, that largest human group, disappeared, I didn’t know where to go. After wandering for a while, I went to find a human group that seemed relatively quiet.
I came wearing human form in case there’d be another mass death if I came over as my true form. At first they didn’t recognize me, but fortunately they recognized the Dryads who came with me. My goodness, really. Humans are troublesome.
“Raha is a pretty child.”
The humans didn’t seem to easily understand my words. Communing is simple, but humans can’t commune. They can’t even hear it. They really take a lot of work.
“I’m honestly worried. I’m afraid you might harm Raha because he’s too pretty. I have no faith at all. I’d like to think you wouldn’t do anything since he’s your own kind, but seeing what you’ve done so far, I just can’t leave it alone.”
The leader of the human group didn’t know what to do at my words. He really doesn’t seem to know what this situation even is. I kindly explained. That I want to entrust our Raha here. The human leader looked troubled, but said he understood.
Regrettably, I can’t trust humans, so I needed a slight safety measure.
“It’s hard to call it an exchange, but I’ll also provide some conveniences.”
“Wh-what kind of… conveniences, do you mean?”
“You know, those things. Like needing water, or the land seems a bit weak so help us. The things you mainly wanted from me. I’ll grant them directly without you having to bother praying and setting up pretty altars to offer them one by one.”
At my words, the humans brightened. Their attitude completely changed as if they’d never shown a troubled expression. They held Raha as if cradling a newborn lamb.
“Th-then you’ll protect us?”
“I can’t stop you from fighting among yourselves one by one. But if you’re about to die, that… I can at least give some help so you don’t go extinct. Mainly I’ll be resolving minor inconveniences to your survival… I’ll grant pretty much anything. As long as I can grant it, and as long as it doesn’t encroach on other causality.”
Actually, well, it’s what I’ve been doing occasionally all along. I haven’t helped humans recently since they haven’t been doing acts of supplication to me lately, but over that long time, I never particularly refused requests either. In other words, once someone spoke, I did listen.
But the reason I bothered to say this out loud is, as expected, because I can’t trust humans.
If I just leave him, he’ll surely end up like Miros. Due to recent events, my trust in humans has hit rock bottom. Even that precious one who received a Star and was granted favor was treated so terribly, so how can I know what wicked things they’ll do to the fragile Raha?
These things will run wild at their own whim someday even though I spoke so mercifully now. But that doesn’t matter for the moment. If they try to cross the line, I’ll just punish them. If it’s ambiguous, I can end it at the level of giving a warning.
Most of all, I don’t even know if Raha will be alive by then. He’ll live far longer than ordinary humans, but his essence is ultimately human. Death cannot be avoided in any form.
