“It, it hurts…….”
He dragged Dohui to the sofa and shoved him down however he pleased. Dohui’s face was crushed into the cushion. His eyelids were swallowed in perfect darkness. How many days had passed? The window wasn’t even covered, yet Dohui felt that his sense of time had been cut away in strange, uneven pieces.
Tears fell silently and soaked into the sofa.
What did I even do wrong. Where did it all go off course. Was it taking money from a friend? Or stepping outside? Or accepting a bag with no idea where it came from?
Dohui’s front teeth chattered in small, fine trembles. They knocked together soundlessly. If he had to name one mistake — it was letting something into his home without knowing it belonged to this man.
However much time had passed, by now the people around him would know he was gone. Please, please let someone have called the police…… please, someone find me.
It was while Dohui was clinging to that dim, fragile hope. The man shattered even that.
“Ugh.“
Dohui’s head was lifted. Gong Haejin studied him with half-lidded, languid eyes, taking in the yellowing bruise across his cheekbone and his split lips.
“Filthy. Your body.”
“…….”
“Did you learn well?”
He asked it as though they had given him some great education. The reality had been utterly brutal. The man who had thrown him into a cage of beasts seemed to find the resulting sight amusing.
“You cried so much your nose is red again.”
“……I w-won’t.”
“Won’t what. What do you think I’m about to do.”
After swallowing the water and pills they gave him, his mind let go after a set amount of time. Chunks of memory had been stripped away, and within what remained, it was hazy — what he’d said, what he’d done.
Should he be grateful for that? If he’d remembered everything, he might have lost his sanity long before this. He would have been buried alive under the weight of a horrible misery.
But Dohui had no intention of enduring everything like a fool. His other memories were uselessly vivid. He had been raped. Repeatedly. The wetness splitting down his cheek dropped off his chin.
“Ah, fuck.”
Gong Haejin let out an irritated curse. Something wasn’t going the way he wanted.
Dohui inched slowly away from him. He barely managed to put a hand’s width of distance between them, but a single reach of the man’s hand pulled him right back. His already-blurred vision had even less focus than before.
A brief rustling sound. Then a hand with dark intentions gripped his chin, and something soft touched his lips.
“Mm…….”
Water filled Dohui’s mouth — water he had no need for. Gong Haejin had passed what he’d been holding in his mouth to Dohui’s lips. Something foreign came with it and he tried to spit it out, but the man’s tongue blocked him. It tangled with his inside his mouth as if intent on breaking whatever it was apart and sharing it between them.
“Ugh…….”
He swallowed it in the end, and the man pulled back.
The man, who had come in wrapped in the night, carried the faint smell of alcohol. From the fingertips of his leather-gloved hands, several different scents were all tangled together. Dohui wrinkled his nose. It smelled like a mix of cosmetics.
Gong Haejin lifted Dohui up onto his lap. He looked Dohui’s body over slowly — sitting astride his thighs, legs spread wide open.
Whether it was the alcohol or something else, the filthy body wasn’t unpleasant. He reeked of semen, the raw smell drifting off him. As though advertising that someone had been enthusiastically fucking him until just moments ago.
“Do you know what you look like right now?”
A dazed gaze followed shortly after.
“You’re sitting on top of me with other men’s semen smeared across your collarbone, chest, navel, and thighs. Someone looking at you might think you were wearing clothes made of cum. The smell is something else.”
Gong Haejin’s palm came to rest against the swollen cheek. The rough hand quickly moved to close around his slender throat, and Dohui held his breath. He tensed sharply, thinking he was going to be strangled again — but the hand released cleanly.
Every time Gong Haejin made contact with him, that part of him trembled. The man seemed to notice, and let out a quiet smirk.
The hand passed over his ribs along the side of his waist and settled on the jut of his hip. Then it gripped the wide-spread inner thigh.
“Ngh…….”
The flesh pressed under those fingers ached with a dull, electric throb like a muscle bruise.
“You’ve lost weight.”
He said it as though he’d discovered something new. Who was it that had stripped the clothes off him himself.
That thought brought another wave of grief — but it faded quickly. This had been happening often since he’d been brought here. The sticky, fearful emotions vanished as fast as a momentary nightmare. And in their place, an unfamiliar pleasure took up residence.
A pleasure that resembled pain spread rapidly from the thigh Gong Haejin had gripped out to every corner of his body.
“Hff…… again…….”
“Yeah, again.”
The man patted Dohui’s backside in light, not-quite-painful taps. Yet the stimulation was sharp. In place of pain — arousal; in place of sorrow — pleasure, soaking Dohui’s mind all over again.
Like a matchstick with nowhere to go burning what it shouldn’t, the pain Dohui had felt was dissolving away.
“Swollen.”
There was a smile in Gong Haejin’s voice. Dohui didn’t know how long, or how many men, had been inside him.
Even at small contact he groaned and rubbed his forehead against the man’s shoulder. When he tensed his stomach even slightly, something seeped out from the narrow entrance. What little trickled out slid down the inside of his thigh. The ticklish sensation made his hips shift.
“Those bastards didn’t even pull out?”
“…….”
“Or was there no time to?”
Saying that, fingers felt between his cheeks. The movement of those hands was unmistakable in what they were searching for.
No, no. Dohui twisted his hips, but the man was far too practiced. He found the swollen entrance in one motion and pushed inside — leather gloves still on.
Dohui’s spine went rigid and straight. The sensation of leather forcing its way rudely into his ragged, worn-out insides was vivid and sharp. It hurt, and it was wrong. When the man scissored his fingers to spread the entrance open, what had pooled inside came spilling out in drops.
He learned then that the bloated, uncomfortable fullness in his stomach had been from the semen. Because of this man, knowledge he never should have needed kept accumulating.
Where a cock entered. Where, when rubbed, he would come. How deep was too deep before his stomach ached. What it felt like when semen came in. How absolutely wretched it was to have his insides flooded as though being filled to capacity. The curses slipped out of him before he even had time to be surprised by them.
“Hff…… s-stop…….”
“Shh. When I’m being kind, behave a little.”
Dohui panted and rolled his hips. It was almost like using the man’s hand to touch himself. The man seemed to feel it too — he pushed his fingers deeper.
One corner of Gong Haejin’s mouth lifted slowly.
“I think I’m being quite gentle at this point.”
“Haa…… mm…….”
“Giving you your medication on time. Offering a way to pay off the debt. And on top of that, teaching you.”
“Mm-haa…… no more’s…… coming out. Mmm.”
From deep inside the opening that had been spread without his consent, something clumped together and slid out in a long trail. Dohui shuddered at the sensation that lingered along every path it traveled, every place it passed. Still, the man didn’t stop. He seemed to be doing it purely to toy with Dohui.
“Ngh……!”
Inside the swollen inner walls, made tender from friction — he pressed steadily against that spot he’d found with practiced ease.
Against his will, the front of him responded. No. I said no. Dohui slurred his protest. Ten powerless fingers splayed wide and tangled into the man’s hair.
The hair — meticulously styled, as though he’d come from somewhere that required it — fell apart between Dohui’s thin fingers. Still, as though unwilling to give up this amusement, he kept applying pressure.
“Hah…… hah…….”
A texture unlike skin wrapped around the cock that had stiffened upright.
Dohui, mouth hanging open, was completely caught. Fingers working inside him from behind, adequate pressure in front. The tip of the cock, violated by so many men, was faintly red. When steady pressure was applied to that spot, pre-cum welled up in soft beads.
“Being this wet is a blessing.”
Slick, slick. Every time the ring of the man’s hand moved, obscene sounds followed.
He wanted to cover his ears — but Dohui couldn’t bring himself to let go of the grip he had on the man’s hair. If he let go, he felt like he’d topple backward. His body felt like it was teetering at the very edge of a cliff. He was gripped by the terror that the moment the man let go, he would plunge headlong down into the void below.
“Hff……!”
A pale, milky fluid spilled weakly from the tip of his cock. He’d been made to come so many times that his balls must have been empty — the amount was small. Yet the climax felt impossibly distant. When he closed his eyes, bursts of light cracked and scattered like fireworks, rattling his mind in all directions.
Gong Haejin’s hand withdrew, and Dohui crumpled without strength. Unbearable self-loathing washed over him. Sensations he never wanted to revisit came crawling back with just a few of the man’s gestures, and they tormented him.
“Tired out already?”
Even with his eyes closed, his vision swam. Soon his back met the surface beneath him. The sofa he’d been lying on this whole time.
“…….”
“Nothing to say?”
“What would I even…….”
“Anything.”
“I…… I…… I don’t know.”
“Right. I figured.”
After that, he was swallowed by a licentious smell that, no matter how many times it filled his lungs, he could never get used to.
***
Gong Haejin woke in the morning in poor condition. It was a recurring ailment he suffered every time he returned from those disorderly gatherings that passed themselves off as meetings. A head this relentlessly pounding wasn’t something that could be fixed by just anything. Even so, today was a little better than usual.
