Would he really be that thoughtless? he wondered, but then he also thought the kid was more than capable of doing just that. Hadn’t he been grinding his teeth saying he wouldn’t let Wi Seokwoo off, burning with murderous intent?
This kid, really, what’s he trying to do alone!
Yeojin ran outside, irritated inside. He needed to wake people up.
He was running down the corridor with that thought. From somewhere came a caw—a crow’s cry along with the sound of flapping wings. It was a sound coming from the balcony side at the end of the corridor. When he approached that way and opened the balcony door to go out, Haeju was leaning against the railing.
Kkamang, sitting on the railing, recognized Yeojin and cawed. While feeling relieved, irritation also welled up.
“What are you doing here at this hour?”
He asked while approaching beside the kid.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
“Do you know how startled I was thinking you went to catch Wi Seokwoo alone?”
“No way. I’m not that thoughtless.”
Saying that, Haeju chuckled. The kid took a deep breath and inhaled the clear dawn air fully. All that could be seen from here was a wide open garden, but the garden was so well-landscaped it was worth looking at.
“It’s nice. When I was at the Center, even if I woke up at dawn, I was locked in my room with nothing to do, but here I can walk around anywhere. At the Center, I could never sleep.”
Come to think of it, compared to when he was at the Center, this place would be heaven.
“But the other quarantine subjects all slept well.”
Even if they suffered from anxiety and depression, there were no quarantine subjects who complained of insomnia.
“The staff feed sleeping pills to the quarantine subjects.”
“What?”
Yeojin’s voice came out sharp without him realizing it. This was the first he’d heard of it. Yeojin was the Center’s attending physician. They administered medicine to the quarantine subjects on their own without a doctor’s prescription?
“Center staff walk around the quarantine wing at night and make sure we take it, saying it’s medicine to control abilities. Even with the control chip implanted, they said it’s medicine that regulates and stabilizes the body’s hormone system. But it was sleeping pills. They forcibly put us to sleep with drugs and made us docile.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
Yeojin muttered, dumbfounded.
“Do you think I’m lying?”
“No, it’s not that—I’m just so shocked. What kind of insane thing have they been doing without even getting permission from me, the doctor?”
“If they’d told you, Doctor, you would have definitely opposed it, so they did it secretly.”
Even so, isn’t this too much? The more he thought about it, the more dumbfounded he felt. This was a fact he had never known despite working at the Center for years. The outdated facilities of the quarantine wing, the terrible meals and heating—those weren’t the only problems. It seemed Center staff had been committing all sorts of atrocities beyond common sense against the quarantine subjects.
“The staff would only leave after confirming we took the medicine. When we took the medicine, drowsiness would pour in immediately and everyone would fall asleep as if knocked out.”
Huff. Yeojin let out a deep sigh. He never imagined the Center staff would do such things. Still, he’d felt relieved thinking fortunately everyone was sleeping well—how foolish of him. But even if he’d known beforehand, what would have changed? No matter how much he opposed and protested alone, there were limits to what an individual could change.
“Even when you took the sleeping pills, you couldn’t sleep?”
“I pretended to swallow and went back to my room and spit it out. There are many people who, like me, knew the medicine the staff gave was sleeping pills and secretly threw it away.”
“I see. You did well.”
That was all he could say. But the more he thought about it, the more irritated and absurd it felt, so he eventually spat out a curse.
“But seriously, that’s so fucked up.”
Haeju chuckled.
“You’re really sexy when you curse, Doctor. It’s the first time I’ve seen a doctor curse so well.”
“Doctors all curse when there are no patients around. Doctors are human too.”
Haeju kept giggling, finding something so amusing. His laughing face just looked youthful. Though he was of legal adult age, to Yeojin he still seemed like a child. His abundant hair fluttering in the wind looked like it would be soft, so he reached out his hand and stroked the kid’s hair. Haeju looked at Yeojin and smiled contentedly.
“How’s your head injury?”
He’d said he’d at least give first aid since they couldn’t go to the hospital, but Haeju said it was just slightly scratched and wouldn’t even let him look.
“It’s fine. How’s your condition, Doctor? You were sleeping well last night. I touched you and kissed you all over but you didn’t wake up.”
Yeojin narrowed his brow. Somehow it didn’t sound like a joke.
“That’s sexual harassment, you bastard.”
Haeju just laughed. It was a laugh that made even the observer feel good. His eyes looking at Yeojin overflowed with affection. You could tell just by looking at his eyes. How much this kid liked him. What could be so good about him? He hadn’t even done that much for him.
With the hand that had been stroking Haeju’s hair, he tapped Haeju’s smooth cheek and withdrew his hand. The kid slowly blinked as if regretful.
“Doctor, I’m so happy right now.”
“What are you so happy about?”
When there was nothing to be happy about. Haeju continued with a smiling face.
“When I was at the Center, I prayed every day that I could be with you all day, Doctor. But now I can be with you all day like this. My dream came true.”
“Your dream is quite modest.”
Yeojin said that and chuckled. Haeju also grinned. Haeju’s hair scattered wildly in the blowing wind. His face reflected in the dawn light looked particularly beautiful.
“Until I met you, Doctor, my world was a world of darkness. It was like being trapped in a tunnel blocked front and back. I just lived because I couldn’t die. Even wanting to die, I couldn’t. I tried to die but they saved me.”
Even talking about his difficult past, the kid’s face was endlessly bright.
“Doctor, the day of the car accident. That accident was actually…”
“That’s enough.”
Yeojin opened his mouth to stop Haeju’s words. He didn’t want to hear it. Whatever the truth of the accident was, he didn’t want to know the detailed circumstances. He wasn’t even curious.
“What’s important is that you’re alive like this.”
That Seo Haeju is alive. That’s what’s important—what does the past matter so much? Yeojin glanced at Haeju’s hand on the balcony railing. The wrist wearing the broken wristwatch. The self-harm scars hidden under the watch. It was all past.
“Whatever the past, let’s live in the present. Let’s look only forward without looking back, ruminating and regretting.”
This was something Yeojin was saying to himself too. The smile spreading across Haeju’s face deepened further. Pretty smile wrinkles folded around his eyes too.
“I really like you, Doctor. I want to continue being together with you like this.”
Though it wasn’t new since he’d heard it so much, was it because of the dawn sentimentality? This confession sounded incredibly romantic. His heart pounded. The dawn light beautifully descended upon Haeju’s face.
It was a picturesque scene. A place where the light of early dawn just breaking shone. Clear and refreshing air. A cool breeze tickling the skin. A beautiful young man who seemed to have popped out of a painting. Everything was so beautiful. Enough to pierce the chest. Enough to make the eyes sting.
How long had it been since he’d purely admired something beautiful like this?
Yeojin also felt happiness like Haeju. Even though there was absolutely nothing to be happy about, a full sense of happiness surged up from deep in his stomach.
Haeju was so suddenly dear and cute and lovely that he had to struggle to suppress the impulse to embrace the kid. If he couldn’t resist the impulse and acted on it, it might lead to embarrassing skinship.
“My wish is, even though I’m with you now, Doctor, to live with you tomorrow, the day after, a week later—for life.”
“Is that all your wish is?”
“Yes. I don’t wish for anything else. I just need you, Doctor. Ah, there is one more thing though.”
“What?”
“Eating tteokbokki.”
Yeojin burst into loud laughter. It was both cute and pitiful. Your wish is only that? But if someone asked Yeojin what his wish was too, he felt like he’d give a similar answer to Haeju’s.
Escaping this shitty situation and living a comfortable life with Haeju.
Before this happened, he had no wish to speak of. He just lived as things went. Waking up in the morning to the alarm sound, eating breakfast roughly, washing up, commuting to the Center, working, leaving work. Coming into the empty house with no one there, turning on the TV first because he disliked the quiet, preparing dinner. While eating, blankly watching dramas or entertainment programs, exercising a bit, washing up and falling asleep.
Like any office worker, he lived a life that seemed to go round like a hamster wheel. It was always the same daily routine. He sincerely treated the Center’s quarantine subjects, tried his best to stand on their side and lessen their suffering as much as possible, but that was all.
Until Haeju entered the Center, he just lived as things went like that. With no dreams, no hopes, no future plans, just going with the flow.
After witnessing Haeju’s car accident and meeting the kid, Yeojin’s tedious life also changed. After Haeju came to the Center, Yeojin always commuted to the Center early in the morning. Because he was worried about Haeju’s condition. As soon as he arrived at work, he’d run to the hospital room to check on Haeju’s condition before entering work. Even during work, he kept visiting Haeju. Every time Yeojin visited, Haeju would call “Doctor” and welcome him with a face smiling as innocently as a child.
The fact that there was someone eagerly waiting for him. That became a great vitality in life.
He also remembered his younger brother who used to wait for Yeojin to come home. His younger brother would come out in front of the house and wait, timing it to when Yeojin would return home. When his younger brother spotted Yeojin coming, he’d smile saying “Hyuuuung!” and wave his hand.
