With his hands in his hoodie pockets, Hui-myeong passed the shopping arcade and walked down the street. The appearance that had looked mature in the dressy clothes from Mad Hat now looked as young as a youth just over twenty.
People who saw Jung Hui-myeong for the first time all agreed that his first impression was like a young master who hadn’t suffered hardship. Looking back on his life after age twenty, it wasn’t wrong either. He hadn’t gotten a drop of water on his hands—though he’d gotten plenty of dick juice—and had never earned a single thousand-won bill. But if asked whether it was a comfortable life, it wasn’t particularly so.
If I’d been with hyung, it might have been a better life.
At the face of a man that unconsciously came to mind, Hui-myeong momentarily stopped walking.
Why did that face suddenly come to mind? There was only one reason. Because he appeared and saved Hui-myeong every time he wanted to run away. But finding him now was harder than finding a buoy floating in the vast ocean.
I have to solve it on my own now.
Hui-myeong shook his head to erase the thought and hurried his steps.
After walking down for a while, he bought a pack of cigarettes and a lighter at a convenience store next to a secluded park. Sitting in the dark park, lighting the cigarette and exhaling the smoke, it felt like the miscellaneous thoughts inside were being pulled out with it.
I should quit.
After getting beaten by Do-ha a few times for drinking and causing a scene, Hui-myeong didn’t drink alcohol even when alone. Living with Do-ha, who liked control, in Korea where there were already many restrictions, this cigarette he occasionally snuck out to smoke was the only deviation allowed to him.
Is hyung doing well?
Whether it was the autumn night air, the old connection came to mind again. The person Hui-myeong had loved uniquely, the one who revived him when he was trampled.
He’d been cutting it off for a while, so he didn’t know why he suddenly thought of him particularly today. Was it because his desire to run away right now had swelled?
Just be by my side.
The firmness that had dwelled in that indifferent tone. If it were him, he wouldn’t have made Hui-myeong want to run away. Unless he had held him there to stay by his side.
If it hadn’t been Do-ha, couldn’t he be with him right now? The longer the fleeting imagination went on, the more he kept attaching absurd suppositions.
If it were hyung, he wouldn’t have married and left me. If it were hyung, he wouldn’t have oppressed me like this. If it were hyung, if it were hyung. Futile thoughts chased each other’s tails, making Hui-myeong more miserable.
Only after a cigarette had completely burned down did Hui-myeong stub out the butt.
“Terrible.”
Hui-myeong muttered quietly to himself.
He thought that perhaps his situation was even worse than a pet dog’s. Rather than secretly running away, it would be right to take this marriage as an opportunity to truly leave him. Instead of sneaking away and getting beaten again, he should somehow pay back the money and reclaim his rights. And then live a new life.
As his thoughts continued, the pawn shop he’d passed on the way home came to mind.
It should be okay just to ask.
A proper bank wouldn’t give a fifty million won loan to a twenty-nine-year-old with nothing but his body, so he at least wanted to try getting his watch appraised.
Hui-myeong took out the crumpled fifty-thousand-won bill he’d kept in his phone case and had it loaded at the convenience store. Not only his phone’s location but all card transactions were tracked by Do-ha. He didn’t allow even a single ten-won coin of cash whose use couldn’t be accounted for. Even this had come from accidentally receiving cash back for a mistaken payment at a small shop before.
Standing on the street, he caught a taxi and gave the destination while recalling the place he’d passed earlier. His heart pounded at this deviation after so long. Though moving his thoughts into action was impulsive, the process flowed naturally like water.
He won’t come back quickly.
With the wedding right around the corner, Do-ha went out at night once or twice a week and didn’t come home until past midnight. It was to perform official couple duties with his fiancée, Seol Jay.
He’d be back soon, so it should be okay. Hui-myeong comforted himself while looking out the window.
“Please let me out here.”
When he saw a familiar sign, Hui-myeong stopped the taxi. Though he paid with a single fifty-thousand-won bill, seven bills and five coins poured out as change. Since it was cash obtained with difficulty, he couldn’t handle it carelessly. Hui-myeong tightly wrapped the coins in the bills, carefully put them in his pocket, and went up to the pawn shop.
Contrary to his momentum, as soon as he entered and saw the menacing bulky figures inside, Hui-myeong momentarily froze. They were smoking and playing poker enough to remind one of a raccoon den.
“Hey, let’s take a customer!”
When one of the large ones shouted, the other men put down their cards and stood up. As multiple bulky figures approached at once, Hui-myeong became frightened.
“How can we help you?”
They approached with giggles as if they’d found delicious prey.
“I-I-I c-came for a consultation.”
“Come on in. We’ll treat you well.”
One of the men put his arm around Hui-myeong’s shoulders and forcibly dragged him inside.
“Oh my, so pretty. Our little brother, can we comfortably call you little brother? Wow, look at how white each finger joint is.”
The man with his arm around him touched Hui-myeong’s finger joints admiringly. Contact with a man other than Do-ha was rare for him, so he naturally tensed up.
“He looks like he doesn’t even have hair on his dick.”
“Our little brother, does your beard grow?”
As soon as the door closed, they surrounded Hui-myeong and examined various parts of his body.
Strictly speaking, Hui-myeong was probably older or similar in age, but the thug group treated him like a child.
“I-I think I came to the wrong place.”
When Hui-myeong backed away trying to escape, another bulk blocked his retreat.
“Why? Looks like you came to the right place. How much do you need?”
“We treat people like little brother really well. It’s okay without collateral. Our little brother, with a face like that, taking you anywhere and paying back even the interest would be nothing.”
“Sit down. Coffee? Green tea? Want a beer?”
The man forcibly grabbed Hui-myeong’s wrist and made him sit on the sofa. He’d come to the wrong place. He should have just stayed home. The outside world was dangerous after all. He’d only planned to ask, but it seemed like something bad might happen. An uneasy feeling bloomed as his whole body sounded alarm bells. That’s when it happened.
“You fucking bastards aren’t doing your work and messing around.”
Spewing profanity, a man entered the office. With just his presence, order was instantly established inside. The men jumped up from their seats and politely clasped both hands in front of their stomachs.
“Ah, haha. Kang-i hyungnim, when did you arrive?”
At the name “Kang,” Hui-myeong also turned around. The moment he confirmed the man’s face, Hui-myeong froze in place. In an unimaginable location, he’d encountered an unimaginable person. How could this man appear before his eyes?
“Kang-i hyung…”
Calling his name made his throat feel hot. He couldn’t believe it even seeing him. He’d thought he’d never see him again, but he appeared suddenly before Hui-myeong’s eyes as if he’d fallen from the sky. Even 10 years ago, he appeared like a ghost whenever Hui-myeong was in trouble, so how could he still be the same?
Unlike Hui-myeong, the man looked down indifferently. There was no emotion, no change in expression. If it were the gaze of seeing someone for the first time, he could understand, but he couldn’t read anything inside from that unfamiliar face.
“Did you come to borrow money?”
Does he not recognize me? Flustered by his cold reaction, Hui-myeong forgot to answer.
“I asked if you came to borrow money.”
“Ah, y-yes.”
Overwhelmed by his raw presence, formal speech popped out of Hui-myeong’s mouth.
“Collateral?”
He asked while flopping down on the sofa. In a black suit with no tie, he looked as comfortable as if wearing a tracksuit.
“Hyungnim, for a kid like that even without collateral…”
“Shut up, you fucking bastards.”
The man threw a tissue box at the head of a subordinate who tried to chime in pleasantly. Hui-myeong’s body instinctively shrank at his action in surprise.
“So, what?”
“Excuse me?”
“I said what’s the collateral, you want me to fucking say it twice?”
The man inserted profanity between words like punctuation. Even the giggling gangsters held back their bodies in case they caught stray fire.
“Ah, th-this.”
So the man wouldn’t get agitated, Hui-myeong hurriedly took off his watch and handed it over.
I don’t think he was this big before.
