“Ah, the panties bought for ‘baby’ are too small so they’re squeezing there incredibly tight. It hurts like hell, fucking much. Since ‘baby’ is a ‘baby,’ it seems like there is also small like a ‘baby.'”
“…….”
Though it was a soliloquy, it was so loud it stuck right into my ears. ‘Baby,’ ‘panties,’ ‘there.’ Let’s ignore it, ignore…… Maha Prajnaparamita Sutra…….
I tried to calm my boiling insides by recalling a Buddhist sutra I had heard somewhere. But since I was neither a Buddhist nor a monk, the sutra quickly cut off. And I shouted vigorously inside. I! My height! My hands! My feet! And there! Are objectively not on the small side! You’re the one who’s ridiculously big! With that much difference in thigh circumference, would my underwear be comfortable for you, you fucking bastard!
Big D
The system, particularly annoying today, floated Joel’s nickname in the air that I really didn’t want to see again, and I quickly waved my hand to erase those letters. But instead of disappearing, [Big D] was projected onto my palm as if tattooed.
* * *
I wanted to ride my bicycle to school as usual. I didn’t want to ride in Joel’s car or anything. But from Mom to Dad to hyung, they all came out and waved their hands to see us off, so I had no choice but to ride in Joel’s car. When I asked when the hell they were going to work, they said it didn’t matter if they went late. Dad even pressed allowance money into my hand and said,
‘Dat…… No, if you need more while hanging out with your friend, use it!’
‘It’s not! Like that!’
I shouted while sticking my head out the window, but vroom! Joel’s car started on its own, so my voice was drowned out by the engine sound. My family clearly already considered Joel a son-in-law or male daughter-in-law!
Even if I were dating Joel (though of course I’m not!), it’s just a first high school romance, these thoughts were too excessive. But maybe because Mom, Dad, and hyung all met their partners in high school, at this rate they’d be looking for wedding venues starting next week.
“Next time, absolutely don’t come to our house.”
“Why should I listen to you?”
“If you come again, you and I will end up having a wedding side by side!”
When I shouted loudly with a frowning face, Joel scoffed.
“What marriage. Even if you grab my pant leg and beg, would I marry an idiot like you? My ideal type is a woman with big breasts and sexy. Wake up from your dream. You virgin gay.”
“That’s why! I don’t want to marry you either!”
“……Fuck, why don’t you want to! Where else is there a man as big down there, sexy, and handsome as me!”
But Joel, who had suddenly stopped the car, yelled at me angrily. What an absurd bastard! I didn’t back down either and shouted.
“You said you wouldn’t marry me anyway, what does it matter!”
“Can’t I do it? I just won’t!”
“So why would you and I get married!”
“Are you kidding! You’re the one who brought up marriage first!”
“That’s why I’m saying don’t come to our house from now on!”
Fighting with Joel like that for a while, I only realized much later that the current conversation was quite strange. Doesn’t it seem just like…… a couple in a slump fighting about marriage? Just imagining that made the back of my head throb, so I sank deeply into the passenger seat.
“……Anyway, whether it’s dawn, day, or night, don’t come to our house. My family is misunderstanding.”
I crossed my arms and turned my body to the side, meaning I wouldn’t talk anymore. I heard a “hmph” scoff, but Joel didn’t say anything more.
We arrived at school quietly like that, and even though I had just arrived at school, I was so exhausted I wanted to collapse. Too many things had happened since dawn. It was all because of that bastard Joel Gomez.
For some reason Joel was sulking alone again and—thud, thud, thud!—unbuckled his seatbelt, grabbed his bag, and got out of the car, making loud noises. And with his arms crossed, shaking his legs, he shouted.
“Get out quickly!”
Bam! He even punched the hood with his fist. Even if you do that, it’s your car that’s getting ruined, is this mine? I scoffed inwardly while slowly gathering my bag and trying to open the passenger door. Then—bang!—I looked at Joel, who pushed the passenger door shut again just as it had opened slightly, with an incredulous gaze.
“You told me to get out quickly!”
“Say it properly.”
“What?”
“I said say it properly. It’s not that I ‘can’t’ marry you, but that I ‘won’t.’ And, fuck! I’m at a loss. Marriage with a bastard like you, it’s not that I can’t do it, I just won’t.”
“……What.”
I thought, why is he bringing up something that already ended a while ago? And in this school parking lot at that. Finding it absurd, I was frowning when Joel—slam!—forcefully opened the passenger door, grabbed me by the collar, and pulled me out.
“Ugh!”
“Let’s see if I go to such a place next time!”
Thud—staggering from the hand pushing me, barely planting my feet and standing, I glared at Joel’s back as he walked away roughly with loud footsteps—stomp, stomp, stomp! ‘Such a place’? Don’t tell me he’s talking about our house?
“That ungrateful bastard!”
Our Mom and Dad fed you, even lent you the bathroom, lent you clothes! What? ‘Such a place’? The food you devoured was enough for our family for two meals, you glutton! And who asked you to come? You came on your own and this is the bullshit.
“Joel Gomez, fucking bastard…….”
I patted—pat, pat—my crumpled top that had been wrinkled by that son of a bitch, smoothing out the wrinkles as much as possible. Hyung, what did you say? That he likes me? Who acts like this to someone they like? Don’t tell me hyung is like this? Then break up!
I pointlessly doubted the relationship between hyung and his girlfriend, who were deep enough to have marriage discussions, then startled by the fact that I was about to be late, hurriedly ran into the school. And in the end, I was 2 minutes late to my first class. Anyway, nothing ever went right when I got tangled up with Joel Gomez!
* * *
Fortunately, today I didn’t have a single class overlapping with Joel. Not a single one! It was a very joyful and happy fact. Seeing that bastard’s face just in the morning was enough. No, it was already overflowing.
“Hi.”
“Hi, July.”
I greeted the kids with a smiling face and read their affection levels again. 21, 12, 16, 9……. As expected, there weren’t many significantly high numbers. I had been too busy and forgot for a moment, but I had to complete the quest too. Although there was no time limit, I wasn’t the type to put off assignments, so I felt needlessly anxious. As I was looking around with narrowed eyes for a while like that,
“Huh.”
I smiled brightly at the number 43 and checked the owner of that affection level, then quickly crumpled my expression.
“…….”
“……What.”
It was Joel Gomez. Why, among the many students in this hallway, is your affection level the highest? Why? How? The fact that that bastard was the most likely target to pursue was truly annoying.
I hadn’t forgotten how he’d exhausted me since morning, so I pushed the quest aside for now. Since there’s no time limit anyway, I can slowly build up other kids’ affection levels.
“Why did you look at me like that?”
“Because you’re sooo handsome. Yeah, because you’re sooo handsome and sexy, I was blinded for a moment.”
When I openly mocked him, Joel slightly furrowed his eyebrows. Still, it didn’t seem like something unpleasant to hear as he curled up one corner of his mouth. And he likes it in the midst of this. Finding it absurd, I scoffed inwardly when Joel suddenly approached me with an expression wiped of his smile.
“But I still won’t marry you, idiot.”
“…….”
Ridiculous. I glanced at Joel’s broad back as he passed by me and sighed. Why is he so obsessed with marriage? Does he have excessive self-consciousness that everyone in the world should find him attractive? ……Well, he is on the handsome side…… but his temperament was far too unattractive.
“Hi, July.”
30♥
The person with the second highest affection level after that barking dog bastard stood in front of me and smiled brightly. But this one wasn’t very welcome either.
“……Yeah, hi.”
It was David Evans. This bastard just didn’t curse openly, but he was a bad guy who played with people behind their backs. The fact that the person with the second highest chance of quest success after Joel was this guy, it was truly strange and complicated. Raise his affection level? Or find another target? As I pondered for a moment, Dave tilted his head.
“July. It looked like you came in Joel’s car this morning, did something happen between you two?”
“……No, nothing happened.”
“But why did you come in Joel’s car?”
I didn’t particularly want to talk about it and trailed off vaguely. But whether he was clueless or not, Dave persistently questioned me.
“Something like that happened.”
Since I still wasn’t convinced I should raise Dave’s affection level, I very roughly wrapped up the conversation topic. It meant don’t ask anymore. Dave raised his left eyebrow.
“Are you close with Joel?”
“No.”
“I’m not close either.”
“……Right.”
You don’t have to say that while smiling so brightly. Everyone in school already knows you two don’t get along. You got knocked out cold by his punch. And there’s no one who doesn’t know you were even hospitalized.
“My head still seems to hurt. Joel is too violent. Don’t you think?”
“He is violent……. But at least he’s not different in front and behind.”
Finding Dave’s whining annoying, I found myself defending Joel without realizing it. If I had to put it precisely, it was closer to stating facts rather than ‘defending.’ Joel was very consistent both in front and behind. Meaning his temper was consistently terrible.
“July, what I said last time was really sincere. I’m sorry.”
“Okay.”
“Don’t worry, it’s not because I want to ‘kiss’ you again. Ah, I don’t mean I don’t want to.”
Dave, who had been watching his surroundings, leaned toward me and whispered in my ear.
