“Ah, back off a little! I can’t breathe!”
Ian jerked his head back, grimacing at the body odor wafting from the two men crowding in on him. Faces that would normally be clean were now a mess with beards and dark circles, thrust right up to him—he was happy to see them, but it was overwhelming.
“Ian, are you really okay? Nothing hurts? Can you recognize hyung?”
“Ian-nim, can you hear my voice? Can you move your fingers?”
Just as Choi Jaeheon and Vermouth each grabbed one of Ian’s arms from either side, making a fuss, the doctor and nurses came rushing into the hospital room at the sound of the urgent call bell.
A flurry of examinations swept through—pulse, blood pressure, pupil response. After checking the test results, the doctor looked back and forth between the chart and Ian in disbelief and adjusted his glasses.
“It’s nothing short of a miracle. Considering your condition when you were brought in a few days ago, the fact that you’ve opened your eyes now is extraordinary. All your vital signs are normal. However.”
As the doctor trailed off, the two men on either side emitted a murderous aura like wild beasts.
“However what? Speak clearly.”
“Is there some problem with Ian’s body?”
“N-no! It’s not a major problem, but….”
The doctor continued, wiping away cold sweat.
“The core inside your body that serves as the source of your abilities is completely empty. It appears to be a temporary symptom, but you won’t be able to use your abilities for the time being. Right now, you’re physically weaker than an ordinary person, so you absolutely must get complete rest for a while.”
At that moment, a strange silence fell over the hospital room. Despite the bolt-from-the-blue declaration that he couldn’t use his holy power, Choi Jaeheon and Vermouth’s faces showed relief—no, even a peculiar satisfaction.
‘What’s with those reactions?’
While Ian was bewildered, the doctor left the room. And from that day on, the two men’s suffocating “Complete Rest Project” for Ian began.
***
“Come on, say ‘ah.'”
“…Hyung. My hands are fine. All the feeling’s come back.”
“Ian. What did the doctor say? Complete rest! He said your core is completely empty so you’re weaker than an ordinary person right now, didn’t he? The spoon is heavy, so quit complaining and just open your mouth.”
Ian blinked incredulously. No matter how low his stamina was, there was no way a spoon could be heavy.
But he had no way to win against his hyung, who had deep dark circles under his eyes and looked like he was about to cry as he blew on the porridge. When Ian reluctantly opened his mouth, Choi Jaeheon smiled with satisfaction as if he’d gained the whole world and carefully pushed in the perfectly temperature-controlled porridge.
The problem wasn’t just Choi Jaeheon.
“Ian-nim, is the porridge to your taste? If even chewing puts too much strain on your jaw joints, I could chew it finely for you first and pass it to you….”
“No! I swallowed it fine! Don’t say such horrifying things!”
When Vermouth, standing like a statue on the opposite side of the bed, made that insane suggestion with a serious face, Ian waved his hands frantically in horror. Normally he would have taken it as a joke, but right now those eyes were completely sincere. If Ian just gave permission, he looked ready to immediately pass him food he’d chewed himself.
When he tried to go to the bathroom, Vermouth would approach and lift him up in a princess carry as naturally as breathing, and when he tried to drink water, Choi Jaeheon would quickly put a straw to his lips. With this extreme overprotection that didn’t even allow him to cross the hospital room threshold, Ian wanted to just close his eyes again.
“Ah, I’m seriously dying of boredom! Give me my phone. I haven’t been able to look at anything for days.”
At Ian’s demand, Choi Jaeheon firmly shook his head.
“No. The blue light from the screen can stimulate the optic nerves and cause brain fatigue.”
“Hyung, please. I’m seriously going to lose my mind from boredom. Just 10 minutes!”
When Ian whined with a pitiful expression, Choi Jaeheon’s iron wall finally crumbled. He reluctantly took Ian’s smartphone out of the drawer and gave it to him with a warning.
“Exactly 10 minutes. If it’s tiring, you have to put it down right away.”
“Okay, okay.”
Ian pressed the power button, moved by this tool of civilization he was touching for the first time in a while. Backed-up message notifications poured down like a waterfall. Most were check-in messages from Yoon Taegyeom and Hong Seoyoon.
Ian roughly left replies and opened an internet portal site app. He was curious how the outside world had been turning while he’d been confined to the hospital room.
However, as soon as the screen loaded, he saw real-time search rankings that made him doubt his eyes.
[ Real-time Trends ]
- #National_Deception
- #Vermouth_Choi_Ian
- #S-rank_Gate_Meeting_the_Parents
- #Choi_Jaeheon_Back_of_Neck
- #You_Called_It_Business_You_Liars
“…Huh?”
A stupid sound leaked from Ian’s mouth. The state of the search terms was ominous. When he clicked on the #1 search term “#National_Deception” with trembling fingers, countless articles and SNS posts burst out.
Among them, one analysis post with the highest views and retweets caught his eye.
Armchair S-rank Reader
Remember that morning news from before? The newly S-rank rated blonde hottie Vermouth. When the reporter asked why he naturalized, he suddenly hit them with “Because the person I love is here.”
Everyone went crazy asking who that person who saved the universe in a past life was, but now all the breadcrumbs have been collected. This is insane.
Evidence 1. Vivid eyewitness accounts from field personnel
My acquaintance is a Management Bureau control agent, and they said when the S-rank Gate broke out, Choi Ian-nim came to that scene. But then Vermouth suddenly came crashing down from the sky, and in that tense atmosphere, he wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled him close.
When the agents tried to stop him saying it was dangerous, he looked at them like they were bugs, then held Choi Ian-nim tight and just jumped into the S-rank Gate vortex. Is this filming some fantasy romance movie???
Evidence 2. Past eyewitness accounts being reevaluated
Remember when they were spotted on the street eating popcorn on their way to see a movie, and both guilds put out official statements saying “They are business partners for treatment purposes and close brothers^^”?
You change nationality to find a business partner? You dive no-hesitation into an S-rank Gate to save a close dongsaeng?
Conclusion: The ‘person I love’ Vermouth mentioned on the morning news = Saint Choi Ian
Close brothers? Business? Even a passing slime would laugh at you liars!!!
Explain this national deception!! No, don’t explain, just book the wedding venue!!!
The thousands of responses below the post were absolutely explosive.
National Treasure #1 Vermouth
Holy shit, chills. So he confessed his love on the news and then met up for dates after? I thought Vermouth was public property forever, when did he snatch up Choi Ian? ㅠㅠㅠ
Michelin 3-Star Nom Nom
Wait, but isn’t their face combo insane? Gentle Saint X Blonde Straight-Charging Guard Dog Holy Knight. The setting is chef’s kiss. The nation should encourage their relationship.
Anti-Reverse
ㄴㄴ Blonde Straight-Charging Guard Dog Holy Knight X Gentle Saint. It’s the opposite.
Guild Master’s Blood Pressure Meds
I’m most curious about Guild Master Choi Jaeheon’s real-time status ㅋㅋㅋ He’s famous for being crazy about his little brother, but his brother’s about to be stolen by some guy who rolled in from overseas ㅋㅋㅋㅋ Didn’t he grab the back of his neck and collapse?
“Cra-crazy….”
Ian flushed bright red from his face to his neck. His heart was pounding so intensely it felt like it would leap out of his throat.
He’d vaguely known that Vermouth had done news interviews before. But he never dreamed he’d drop a nuclear-bomb-level confession like that on a nationwide live broadcast. And what’s with the public’s insane information-gathering and deduction skills? Some of it contained absurd content, but it was generally accurate.
Now all of South Korea had decided the two of them were dating.
“Vermouth, you bastard!”
Ian covered his burning face and screamed at Vermouth. His voice had no authority at all due to his weakness, but for Ian, it was the maximum anger he could muster.
“…Yes? Ah.”
Vermouth, who had sneakily glanced at Ian’s phone screen, seemed to understand the situation.
A normal person would be flustered or apologetic that their relationship had been exposed nationwide. But Vermouth was different. Instead, the most satisfied and shameless smile in the world bloomed across his handsome, refined face. It was an arrogant expression as if he was delighted to show off to everyone in the world the spoils of war he’d so desired.
“What’s the problem, Ian-nim? I didn’t mix in a single falsehood.”
“How is this not a problem?! Everyone knows now!”
“Wasn’t it something they’d find out eventually anyway? If anything, this is good. Now none of those impious bastards on this land will dare harbor improper feelings toward you, Ian-nim. Not as long as I’m alive.”
Vermouth answered brazenly and held up a fork with a pretty rabbit-shaped apple he’d just painstakingly carved to Ian’s lips.
“Now, have some sweet fruit and calm down. Are you really sure you don’t want me to chew it for you?”
“I’m not eating it! Get that away!”
Ian grabbed a pillow with his reddened face and swung it at Vermouth, but due to his weak strength, his attack couldn’t make a single scratch on Vermouth’s solid muscles. Rather, Vermouth just pleasantly accepted the zero-impact blows and smiled languidly.
There was a man blankly watching that maddening catastrophe from a corner of the hospital room.
“…My little brother.”
The thermos Choi Jaeheon had been holding fell to the floor with a thud and rolled away.
“My one and only little brother has been branded as taken on a nationwide live broadcast?”
The netizens’ predictions were spot on. With all the color drained from his face, Choi Jaeheon firmly grabbed the back of his neck.
