“Our beloved Young Master, it’s time to wake from your dream. Next time, I’d like you to taste the real thing…… not in a dream, but in reality.”
“Wai — wait — you——!”
“Sleep well, Young Master. Regrettable as it is, that’s all for today.”
Leonard willed strength back into his body at Ivan’s parting words. This time, his hands and feet responded. If he could just push a little harder, he felt sure he could move his arm and grab Ivan.
But Ivan was faster. The lips that had been pressed to his cheek shifted to meet Leonard’s own, and Ivan’s hand came to rest at the back of Leonard’s neck.
In that same instant, Leonard moved his arm and tried to seize Ivan where he lay on top of him. But his eyes had already fallen shut — and when he snapped them open again and pushed himself upright, Ivan was already gone.
“……Haa. What on earth.”
Leonard sat there piecing things together, blank for a few seconds, then let out a short, humorless laugh and pressed his fingers to his brow. Unlike the world inside the dream, the room he’d woken into was filled with the pale light of early morning. His front, which had been undeniably exposed in the dream, was now neatly covered, his trousers in place exactly as they had been when he’d first lain down to sleep.
What was different, however, was that his front was damp — and his cock was still swollen and hard. The sensations from the dream still seemed to cling to him.
“Haa…… I think I’ve finally lost my mind.”
He had finished piecing it together. Leonard didn’t want to reach this conclusion, but he had no choice. He had had a wet dream. And of all people — Ivan, that worthless, vulgar male prostitute. The absurdity of it, the sheer humiliation — Leonard remained motionless on the bed for a long while, unable to bring himself to get up.
Having spent a moonlit night tormented by that unpleasant dream, Leonard was now in the middle of handling state affairs in place of the Duke, who had briefly left the estate on business. But because of Ivan’s obscene image, which refused to leave his mind, Leonard could not concentrate at all.
His brow was furrowed in evident displeasure, and he did nothing but tap his pen idly against the desk — the sound echoing over and over through the room. Before long, a sigh escaped Leonard’s lips.
Why on earth had he dreamed something like that?
There was no reason he should have felt desire just from seeing Ivan in that state at the dining room yesterday. He didn’t normally have wet dreams, and his sexual appetite was never particularly strong to begin with — yet he was supposed to have felt lust from watching the pitiful display of some male prostitute? It was truly absurd. But then why had Ivan appeared in his dream?
Leonard gripped his pen tightly, making no effort to conceal his irritation. With Ivan crowding his every thought, he couldn’t get any work done.
“Ha, this is going to drive me mad. Truly.”
Perhaps it was the result of neglecting his desires for so long — but even so, for them to surge forward so suddenly like this. Thinking it might help to calm himself with a cup of tea, Leonard called through the door for a manservant and asked for some to be brought. It wasn’t long before the sound of a cart being wheeled down the hall reached him. Several plates rattled together — it seemed tea and snacks were both being brought. The speed suggested someone had already been preparing in advance.
Knock knock.
“Young Master, I’ve brought some refreshments.”
“Come in.”
The sound of wheels stopped outside Leonard’s door. With his permission, the door opened and a manservant stepped inside. Up to this point, Leonard had kept his gaze fixed on his papers. He assumed the manservant who’d come in would be the one he had just spoken to — no reason to bother looking up. But when the hands setting a teacup and refreshments beside his documents entered his line of vision, he paused ever so slightly.
The hands that came into view were fair and smooth, as if they had never done rough work. The nails were neatly trimmed. And then one detail caught his eye — his gaze lingered on an index finger with a bandage wrapped around it.
Surely not.
Leonard lifted his gaze from the papers and looked at the manservant standing beside him. Ha. The impossible guess was correct. Standing there beside him was Ivan — the very one from his dream — setting out the refreshments.
“You……”
Flinch.
Leonard called out to Ivan without thinking. Ivan drew his shoulders up sharply at the sound of his name, eyes darting about as he dipped his head and clutched the hem of his own clothes. Whether from the weight of his blunder the day before or because he mistakenly assumed he’d done something wrong just now, his face had gone pale — and that pale face entered Leonard’s field of vision. Leonard was at a loss. Why was this person here, and why had he recognized Ivan just from a glimpse of his hands?
“Why are you here?”
“Um, well, that is……”
“I’m quite certain I didn’t ask for you specifically.”
“Young Master……”
“Step back. I have no desire to be in the presence of something as vulgar as you.”
The Ivan from the dream and the Ivan before him now were overlapping in Leonard’s mind. He was already in a sour mood as it was, and having the very cause of that mood appear in person only made it worse. His words came out sharper than intended, biting and harsh. At that, Ivan flushed red and ducked his head low. He was on the verge of tears, the tips of his fingers trembling visibly. Was it because the words were humiliating — or because he was embarrassed?
A sudden curiosity stirred in Leonard — he wanted to see Ivan’s face. So he called Ivan back as he shuffled away and changed his tone. Still cold, but compared to a moment ago, the voice that came out was more flat and even.
“……Lift your head.”
“Pardon?”
“I said, lift your head and look at me.”
“Y — Young Master……”
At Leonard’s words, Ivan gripped the hem of his clothes even tighter and slowly raised the head he’d been hanging low. His eyes wouldn’t stay still, shifting about with wariness, and despite his pale face, the redness rimming his eyes made him look very much on the verge of tears. What had Leonard even done to make him this frightened? Clicking his tongue again at the pitiful display, Leonard looked Ivan over.
Just as he had appeared in the dream, Ivan’s body was slender and slight. But the differences were far more numerous. The eyes that had curved so prettily in the dream, stirring something indecent — now they were downcast and swollen-looking, as though one touch would send the tears spilling over.
The sight of him with his shirt pulled open, calling himself wanton as he swayed his hips — that was nowhere to be found. Instead he stood before Leonard neatly dressed, every button done up to the collar, looking nothing at all like the Ivan from the dream. And where Leonard hadn’t noticed them before, his wrist and finger were wrapped in bandages and medical plaster.
Taking in the sight of those, the dream felt suddenly more vivid, and Leonard let out a small breath, his brow tightening again. At this point, perhaps he was the one with the problem. Ivan, having no idea what was going through Leonard’s mind, watched him anxiously, growing flustered.
“Young Master……? Are you all right?”
“Ha.”
The fact that he had dreamed something like that because of a mere male prostitute. Beyond contempt for Ivan, Leonard found himself contemptible — and with that thought, his voice came out cold again. Of all the people in the world, why did it have to be that one?
“What does a male prostitute have to be so proud of, walking around with your head held high like that?”
“……Young Master.”
“After making such a scene yesterday, shouldn’t your conscience have kept you locked in your room?”
“……”
“Though, in a way, I suppose I’d like to commend your nerve. They do say the stupidest ones are always the most brazen.”
“……I’m sorry.”
“That’s enough. Leave the rest and get out.”
At Leonard’s harsh words, tears finally gathered in Ivan’s eyes. He finished arranging the remaining teacups and, as he poured the tea, his trembling hands were no better than those of an absolute coward. That was a type of person Leonard had little patience for. That he had had a wet dream about someone like this — it put him in anything but a good mood.
Despite Leonard’s reproach, Ivan held himself together through to the very end before leaving. Just before he stepped out, his wrist — likely sprained in yesterday’s fall, wrapped in medical plaster — visibly twitched, and he nearly set a plate down wrong. Nothing like the dream at all. A dream is only ever a dream, after all. Seeing him in reality stirred none of the desire the dream had — only irritation at the unpleasant sight.
Should I burn a sleep incense again?
Leonard found himself seriously considering it in the wake of his restless night — and Ivan, catching a brief sidelong glance at him, quietly left the room. As Ivan crossed the threshold and stepped outside, he was smiling. He looked relieved — like someone who had accomplished exactly what they’d set out to do.
But Leonard, who hadn’t seen that, remained in his sour mood, drinking his tea as he returned to his work. The tea was sweet. He didn’t particularly care for sweet things, and yet strangely, this cup was all right.
“Really…… the absurdity never ends.”
That tea brought by someone he disliked tasted good. The ridiculousness of it drew a short, helpless laugh out of Leonard as he set the teacup down. Right — forget it. If that male prostitute had unsettled him enough to appear in his dreams, perhaps the sleep incense had simply lost its effect. He’d probably slept poorly and that was why the dream had happened.
Leonard rang the bell again and summoned one of the manservants. This time it was not Ivan but a different servant who entered, and Leonard immediately gave the order to change the sleep incense before turning his attention back to his work. There was no reason for him to give that person a second thought. If Ivan kept coming to mind, it was only because he kept appearing in front of him and getting on his nerves. He resolved to himself that from here on, he would ignore Ivan as he always had — and took another quiet sip of tea.
