<Chapter 115>
#13. Seeds of Chaos (4)
Not yet gone…
That was the first thought that came to Durasen’s mind as he hazily regained consciousness. His blurry vision gradually became clearer and more distinct. Despite having swallowed the poison he had prepared in advance, his body seemed perfectly fine aside from being weak and exhausted.
It wasn’t difficult for him to figure out who made all this possible. With the Padrians, who had mastered poisonous and medicinal herbs, and the Sarvies, who excelled in medical arts, both present in the mansion, his suicide attempt might have been impossible from the start.
Instead of feeling relieved at being alive, bitterness and sorrow overwhelmed him first. What made him even more sorrowful was that he couldn’t return to the embrace of the family he had longed for all this time.
“Mr. Durasen.”
Hearing the small voice, he slowly turned his head. Round, gentle brown eyes immediately captured his gaze. Durasen stared at his face without saying anything. Though not a child he had watched over for long, Melty Crosel was a boy Durasen felt affection for.
‘I wonder if my grandchild would have been about this age if he were still alive…’
That was the first thought that came to Durasen’s mind. The image of his grandchild, who used to laugh and be as lively as Melty, flickered in his mind. A child who would toddle after his gruff grandfather, calling him “grandpa.” As Durasen’s eyes grew moist with memories, Melty, who had been watching him, smiled faintly and placed a thick notebook that he had been holding onto Durasen’s chest.
“I found this for you.”
“…”
Durasen tried to respond to Melty but closed his mouth again due to the pain in his throat. Kamin Patel, standing behind Melty, maintained his silence with a complicated expression. Beside him, Calix was looking only at Melty. Thanks to the contrasting demeanor of these two people, Durasen felt that the situation seemed quite surreal.
“Please take a look.”
Melty’s voice was light and refreshing, as if making all the recent events seem meaningless. Enchanted by that encouraging tone, Durasen picked up the thick notebook placed on his chest. The faded cover showed clear signs of accumulated dust that had been wiped away.
Despite his entire body feeling heavy, picking up and opening the notebook was strangely effortless. Melty reached out his hand to support Durasen as he tried to move. However, Calix, who had no intention of allowing Melty to do such strenuous work, stepped forward first to help raise Durasen’s upper body.
Durasen thought it was very unfamiliar to see Calix taking the initiative in place of someone else. Moreover, Calix was clearly displeased with the current situation. It was strange, even fascinating, to see him act so obligingly while making no effort to hide his displeasure.
Durasen almost thought this might not be reality but a dream. If not for the faint pain he felt in his body, he would have gladly believed the current situation was just a dream.
“Mr. Durasen.”
Once more, Melty’s voice called to him with a hint of urging. After staring blankly at Melty’s eyes, which were ordinary brown but uniquely sparkling, Durasen slowly opened the notebook. He then moved his eyes to scan the densely written text in the notebook.
Before long, Durasen’s cheeks were completely damp with tears.
“To Grandfather.”
Beginning with those short words, it was clearly a letter sent to him from his beloved grandchild, who must have been writing it for a long time.
***
Holding the notebook close to his chest as if it were a precious treasure, Durasen continuously shed tears. Kamin Patel watched with complicated emotions as Durasen wept, choking and gasping as if he might stop breathing.
Melty, who was sitting closest to Durasen, wanted to offer comfort somehow but couldn’t bring himself to reach out carelessly. After hesitating briefly, Melty spotted a pocket watch that had been set aside. That familiar watch was undoubtedly the object Durasen had been fiddling with while talking about his family not long ago. Melty quietly picked it up and placed it in Durasen’s hand.
Unlike the others, Calix couldn’t sympathize with Durasen’s emotional changes at all. After watching his crying with a bored expression, Calix reached out and pulled Melty back into his own arms.
“Are you done crying?”
Kamin Patel spoke in a subdued voice. Durasen’s eyes were still wet with tears as he caressed the surface of the notebook with trembling hands, as if handling a precious treasure. The crooked handwriting was filled with affection.
“…Where…”
His voice, cracking like metal, couldn’t even complete a proper sentence. However, Melty, who quickly understood what he wanted to ask, spoke up.
“I found it in the attic on the top floor.”
“…Oh.”
Only after moistening his throat with water offered by Kamin Patel, who glanced at him as he tried to smile with quivering lips, could Durasen barely speak. Although his voice was still broken and torn due to the aftereffects of the deadly poison, it was understandable enough.
“It was… my grandchild’s… favorite place.”
Durasen slowly closed his eyes. In his mind, he could still clearly see his grandchild playing with a bright smile. This mansion had been a space for families and a playground for children.
“…After losing them so futilely, it’s also a place I never visited.”
For fear that any traces might be erased. It was a place where he had instructed even cleaning to be done carefully. The Botenta mansion contained many such hidden places after the sudden misfortune that had emptlessly claimed his entire family. His voice was full of regret. Durasen didn’t ask how Melty knew about that place or how he had come to find the notebook’s existence.
Kamin Patel felt a heaviness in his heart at the slight flicker of life in Durasen’s eyes, as he sat silently with his lips tightly closed and an indecipherable gaze. He only now realized that his friend’s eyes, which he had never found strange before, had been dead for a long time. Having noticed only now what he had missed due to familiarity and the passage of time, Kamin Patel felt a bitterness in his mouth.
“Can I now ask why you did such a thing?”
“…”
Durasen gave a bitter smile at Kamin Patel’s question. When he had first carried out his plan, his body had been full of anger, but after shedding tears, those boiling emotions had somewhat subsided. Sensing that the atmosphere was now more conducive to conversation than before, Kamin Patel carefully chose his words.
“You were quite fond of Iel Tuanivel, weren’t you?”
“…I was fond of her.”
Durasen’s voice also carried bitterness. With an expression of reminiscing, he simply continued to stroke the notebook with his hand.
“Then how could you do such a thing! To that young child!”
Durasen pressed his lips together again at Kamin Patel’s words. Melty reached out and tugged at Kamin Patel’s sleeve. Turning his gaze toward the gentle pull, Kamin Patel took a deep breath at the wavering brown eyes.
“…I have never, not once, forgotten my family who departed before me.”
After the silence, the only thing Durasen uttered was that brief statement. Perhaps because he had overcome the most difficult part—starting—Durasen poured out his story, making his previous silence seem out of character.
“So how could I forgive?”
“Try explaining so I can understand. I know very well that you lost all your children to the epidemic, but what does that have to do with Iel Tuanivel?”
“Everything.”
Durasen let out a hollow laugh and hardened his expression. His gaze, which had been softened by tears, suddenly turned fierce. Kamin Patel swallowed dryly at his hate-filled eyes.
“That child took my family’s lives.”
“Huh? What do you mean…?”
Unlike the bewildered Kamin Patel, Calix seemed to understand roughly. When the disease broke out, Calix had worked hardest to manage the situation. People from different families fought to secure more treatment supplies, but the available quantity itself was limited.
The most common problem at that time was the theft of medicine or herbs allocated to other families. If it had been done through legitimate agreements, there would have been no issue, but not everyone chose such righteous methods.
At the time, the short-staffed Padrian family loaded herbs onto carriages sent by each family. During the process, they implemented double and triple checks and security measures, but they couldn’t know what happened inside the carriages after they departed. They dismissed complainants using the multiple family seals they had received when sending off the carriages. However, complaints that the delivered herbs were completely different or that the quantity had decreased were frequent.
Each family first directed their complaints to the Padrian family for distributing such small quantities. But even the Padrians had no way to increase supplies that didn’t exist. The practice of diverting or switching supplies in each family’s carriage disappeared due to quick countermeasures. The greatest damage occurred during the initial outbreak.
“Did the Tuanivel family hijack the Botenta family’s supplies?”
“…I learned about it not long ago.”
“Hmm. Did the Tuanivel family really do such a thing? If you had revealed this…”
“There’s no point in digging up past events that can’t be resolved.”
Calix cut off Kamin Patel’s words. Kamin Patel seemed to agree as he didn’t press further. Calix glanced at Kamin Patel, who was revving up like an engine while muttering about those despicable people, then turned his gaze to Durasen. As if he had nothing more to say, Durasen had once again fallen silent.
“Even so! I might understand if it were the Tuanivel family, but what fault does that child have!”
“…If you had heard that story… you would have done the same as me.”
Durasen mumbled in a suppressed voice in response to Kamin Patel’s incomprehensible outcry. Durasen’s expression distorted again as he recalled the arrogant face that calmly said, “Wasn’t that just their fate to die? Unlike me,” when he had asked in confusion if she knew about this. Calix’s brow furrowed as he carefully observed the change in Durasen’s expression.
‘Did Iel Tuanivel suffer from that disease back then…?’
He couldn’t remember every individual who had contracted the disease since there were so many, but if she, who was treasured by the Tuanivel family, had suffered from it—as Durasen suggested—they would certainly have done such things and more.
However, the Tuanivel family wasn’t the only one caught up in Durasen’s revenge plot. Calix let out a low sigh as he massaged his stiff shoulders. Calix was the first to be driven to the edge by what Durasen had done. But if the root cause of this incident was the disease that had occurred four years ago, he could understand and let it go.
There were many places that harbored hostile feelings toward the Padrian family, and adding a few more wasn’t particularly surprising. However, if he was responsible for causing the drought, that was a different story. This drought wasn’t targeted at any specific family.
“Was it also the Botenta family who scattered the Avartia seeds in each region?”
“…”
Botenta remained silent in response to Calix’s question. He simply continued to cherish the notebook in his hands. Frustrated by his behavior, Kamin Patel pounded his chest near his heart with his fist. Without even glancing at him, Calix spoke again.
“Mr. Durasen. What else are you hiding?”
