And Sajun regretted calling Woojae to his room. The faint scent he thought he was smelling for the first time in his life felt slightly thicker as Go Woojae entered the room. Though not as much as the moment he got an erection because of him.
“…Come in.”
The eyes that blatantly looked around the room could even be felt as rude, but he didn’t care. It was the first time showing his room to someone else. Though it was just a dorm room anyway.
“Where’s your roommate?”
A question filled with puzzlement broke the silence.
“Roommate?”
“Yeah.”
“I don’t have one.”
Seeing the empty bed and desk, he seemed curious. Suddenly, the image of the next room that had been filthily messy came to mind.
“Why don’t you have a roommate?”
“Ah, the school was considerate.”
To be precise, his family had put pressure on them. If he were to live with an alpha, the other person might notice something, so he had to use a single room. Since there were no single rooms in the dorm, he ended up using a double room alone. But he couldn’t tell Woojae this fact. But he couldn’t find a reason to make up a detailed lie either, so he just answered like that.
“Want to watch sitting down? Or lying down?”
Go Woojae, whose expression changed from moment to moment, was fun to tease. He couldn’t understand what thoughts made him endure his irritation, but for now, he decided to enjoy it.
“Let’s watch on the bed.”
He had proposed it expecting him to be disgusted, but Go Woojae was making bold moves, pretending to be relaxed as if he had made up his mind. He was a bit flustered by the situation being different from his prediction, but soon nodded. He had taken his medicine, and above all, he was just a person with a good body scent—Woojae wasn’t an omega. If he were an omega, there would be no reason to struggle to enter as a beta.
“Lie down, then.”
But that thought was mercilessly shattered the moment their bodies touched. It was a man’s sturdy body no different from his own. Of course, there seemed to be at least a 15kg difference in weight. The shoulders that bumped together tickled, and his nose was filled with Go Woojae’s body scent.
“…Do you wear perfume?”
Sajun fixed his gaze on Go Woojae instead of the movie and asked. The conclusion was that such a nice smell couldn’t naturally come from a person. It must be an artificial scent. It had to be.
“I don’t.”
“Then what body wash do you use?”
If it wasn’t perfume, it must be the smell of bath products. I want to touch him. I want to smell him. A desire he had never felt before roughly urged Sajun on.
“Cucumber soap.”
It was a brand he’d never heard of in his life, but he nodded for now. Cucumber soap, he had to find out what product called cucumber soap was. Sajun muttered the words “cucumber soap” countless times in his head. He had to tell Dr. Yun about this.
In the meantime, Go Woojae threw the same question at him, but he answered roughly. The identity of that cucumber soap Woojae used was more important. And the moment he gave an answer, Woojae brought his face close to him. Sajun stared blankly at Woojae’s face moving away like in slow motion.
“Smells nice.”
Only yours? It was a shock like being hit hard.
“…Should I buy it for you?”
It was something said in the moment. At that moment, he wanted to give Woojae something. It was a different nuance from the persistent proposal to buy him food. If back then it was fun to see his face contort every time he said he’d give him something, this time it was words that came out without him realizing.
“Don’t treat me like a beggar.”
At the fierce reaction, Sajun was momentarily relieved. Though he hadn’t said it to tease, seeing Woojae get angry made him feel at ease. But Go Woojae quickly changed his attitude.
“Don’t keep trying to buy things for me. It’s not like I want anything from you.”
What are you up to? He wanted to ask. As if trying to please him, Go Woojae was maintaining a strangely cringeworthy attitude. It looked like he was forcibly pretending to be friendly. He really didn’t like that. He’d actually prefer if he was irritable instead. In a situation like this, being sharp would be more advantageous for him. If he had, at least their bodies wouldn’t be touching.
“Would you like it if I gave you cucumber soap?”
The more Go Woojae acted prettily with a gentle tone, the more he didn’t know what to do. It would be better if he kept being annoyed and angry. But this appearance wasn’t bad either. His head seemed to become hazy because of that soap scent.
“Are you going to give it to me?”
“About two bars or so…”
I want to touch him. Just once. I want to smell his body scent just a little. I want to breathe it in deeply. Because it feels like this curiosity and thirst will be resolved. Rambling thoughts filled his head. For the first time in his life, Sajun felt anxious.
“Why are you smiling so prettily today?”
Even at the confusing question, Go Woojae didn’t break.
“Do I look pretty?”
The expression “beautifully handsome” would be more appropriate. The sanpaku eyes that coldly glared at him every time returned a question tinged with kindness and a hint of laughter. Yeah, you look pretty. The cringeworthy answer he couldn’t bring himself to say gathered inside his lips.
“Want to try kissing?”
It was an impulsive question, but he definitely wanted to confirm.
“What?”
“I asked if you want to try kissing.”
The expression frozen while still smiling was worth watching. Go Woojae, who had kept a smiling face steadfastly even though it had been slightly twisted all along, completely shattered at the suggestion to kiss twice.
“This crazy bastard…”
Now even that curse was welcome. Yeah, curse and be irritable instead. Sajun clenched his itching palms with a half-given-up attitude. I feel like I’m going crazy wanting to touch him. Should I take one more pill? He couldn’t even gauge what would happen at this rate. He answered with a deliberately calm attitude.
“I was wondering why you weren’t cursing today.”
“Are you crazy? Are you dying to be cursed at by me? You perverted bastard, really!”
The problem was the furious Woojae’s impulsive action. The moment he grabbed his collar, their faces became closer. His body moving away in surprise was regrettable and infuriating. Without even knowing what it meant, his body moved on its own.
“Won’t you get off?!”
Though he clearly grabbed his collar and swung his fist, though Woojae was clearly resisting, he pounced on him like instinct. Go Woojae hates him. That fact was displeasing. After seeing that smile even once, even if it was fake, it felt like an illusion that something given had been taken away. Even in the midst of all this, he thirsted for that subtly wafting body scent.
“Are you the only one who uses cucumber soap or whatever?”
Sajun asked, exhaling rough breaths.
“I’m not, fuck, the president of a cucumber soap company! How would I know that, you bastard!”
“…”
“You like it when things go your way? You like being cursed at and hit by me!”
“…I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
He’s saying strange things without even knowing what he really wants. There wasn’t a single thing about the body touching his hands that he didn’t like. I want to touch more. Unable to overcome the impulse, he buried his head in that nape. It smelled so good he wanted to hide him somewhere. It was absurd.
“What are you? Are you crazy? Won’t you get off? Ah! You’re not even a dog, why are you smelling me?! Ugh, it tickles!”
That was exactly it. Like a dog, he wanted to smell that scent. How can such a smell come from a person? His head was dizzy.
“Hah, ugh, it tickles, ahhh…!”
“…Don’t make strange sounds.”
Don’t provoke me. Please stay still. The request for Go Woojae’s safety didn’t come out of his mouth. I want to lick. With clouded judgment, Sajun finally brought the tip of his tongue to Go Woojae’s nape. It was sweet enough to make his tongue tingle. As he licked, sucked, and sank his teeth in, the desire grew thicker. He barely came to his senses at Go Woojae’s flailing as he gasped and pulled his head away.
“…Are you gay?”
Go Woojae was looking at him with disheveled eyes. He was just as confused.
“Why are you doing this to me?!”
“I want to lick once more, give me permission.”
He asked sincerely. I want to lick more. I want to taste deeper places. I really hope you’ll permit it. Disorganized sentences repeatedly formed and scattered in his head.
“No!!”
He felt mischievous as he avoided eye contact.
“Why?”
“What do you mean why! Where is there a guy who’d be happy having a huge bastard sucking on his neck!”
“I think I’d be happy if you sucked on me, why?”
It was an answer without a single lie.
“What? This crazy bastard, you’ve lost it, haven’t you? You hated me. You ignored me. Why are you suddenly like this?”
“Ignored? I don’t think I’ve ever ignored you?”
“You ignored me from the start.”
“You were the one acting strange.”
“Me? When did I?”
A stupid conversation continued. More than that, he wanted to lick a bit more. Palms, cheeks, lips. Even the skin under the thick, worn hoodie, all of it without exception.
“Just kiss me once. It’s not like it’ll wear out.”
A sentence he wasn’t conscious of popped out of his mouth on its own. The nape he had tasted remained straight and white. The lips would be the same. There’s no way they’d wear out.
“Do you think I’m a slut like you?”
But the answer that came back was cold.
“This is sexual harassment. I clearly expressed that I don’t want to. I don’t want to kiss you.”
As he said, it was a clear attitude with no room for misunderstanding. There was no excuse to hold onto Go Woojae, who pushed past him where he had frozen in a daze and left. The movie had long since moved past incomprehensible parts.
