At the calm yet heart-piercing question, he has nothing to say.
That’s right, convincing Dohyeong is also his responsibility.
Why had he forgotten that he couldn’t just say out of the blue, “Everything I say is sincere, so please believe me”?
“…Not even once have I not believed hyung. I always lived believing in hyung. But in the end, I. What I gained was….”
Two years of being left alone, completely broken.
He barely swallows the words rising up to his throat. Eyes tightly shut, he was chewing on his lips when.
Haesung gently caressed the area around Dohyeong’s eyes.
All kinds of thoughts pass through his mind.
What words could he say to soothe Dohyeong—he was thinking such thoughts before carefully folding them away.
No, now is not the time to soothe him. He just had to convey his sincerity. Without any pretense, only the real story remaining in his heart.
“I can abandon everything.”
Even saying such words wasn’t easy.
“Everything” was a story that included even the value of the name Jung Haesung.
If only the person named Kim Dohyeong would stay by his side, nothing else was necessary to him.
“For you… if you, if you can’t move forward because of my name, I’ll willingly throw away what I have.”
However, Dohyeong couldn’t answer immediately.
Is it sincere?
It was sad that even this led to distrust. Why must he doubt even his sincerity?
Why, have we drifted this far apart, this distant?
“My reputation, my position as an actor, everything. If it’s for you, Kim Dohyeong, I’ll throw it all away. So that you can move forward, achieve everything you wish for, and be happy.”
Haesung, who stopped speaking, smiles faintly. The tip of his thumb that was caressing around Dohyeong’s eyes was now stroking one of his cheeks.
“I can abandon everything.”
“Why. Why, like that….”
“I’ve experienced it.”
Tears began to well up in Dohyeong’s eyes.
Watching that the whole time, one corner of Haesung’s heart throbbed. He didn’t want to make him cry. He only wished for Dohyeong to smile in front of him.
He always makes him cry.
“I was focused on worthless things, so I didn’t even know what was precious. So….”
Haesung, who took a short breath, lowered his head and pressed his forehead against Dohyeong’s.
Why didn’t he know back then that just the warmth they shared could make him this happy?
To realize what’s precious only after losing it. He’s this foolish. Stupid, and dense.
Who would have known that such a moment of reflection would come to Jung Haesung?
“I should protect it now. Not something worthless, but someone truly precious.”
At Haesung’s words, Dohyeong tightly closed his eyes and opened them, then closed and opened them again repeatedly.
He doesn’t want to cry, but his nose keeps tingling.
Even though he must answer, his mouth won’t open properly.
The fact that he had become “someone precious” to him was this, this overwhelming.
“It’s not just words. I’m, I’m ready anytime.”
He grabs Dohyeong once more.
“Ready to choose you, not the things that make up my surroundings.”
Please, just hold my hand one more time.
“…I. Hyung.”
Dohyeong, who was mulling over Haesung’s quietly whispered voice, tightly grasped his hand.
Someone would tell him not to be fooled. That he might be a person with only smooth words.
They might ask if he’s going to fall head over heels for him again and become covered in wounds.
“…I believe you.”
He believes because it’s Haesung.
Because he’s someone who never once gave up on his work.
Because he was someone who prioritized what he had above all else.
If the end of regret was the conclusion that he must grab him even if it means abandoning what he has, he had to willingly believe.
To pretend not to know these feelings and turn away—his feelings toward Haesung were too great for that as well.
“Hyung, your words… I believe. All of them. Everything.”
Was the word “believe” such an overwhelming word?
Dohyeong’s response, who perhaps never once left his side, pierces deep into his heart and tears through it.
So, he said what he couldn’t convey before. What he couldn’t convey because he was Jung Haesung who hadn’t realized.
“I’m sorry for regretting too late.”
Dohyeong shook his head.
It’s okay. Because his sincerity was conveyed even now.
Though it’s said to be late, in the end, they went round and round and met again at that place, no different from that.
He wanted to bury himself a little deeper into Haesung’s palm that tightly grasped his cheek.
However, there was no way Haesung would give him a gap. After taking a breath, he casually said to Dohyeong.
“Then now, it’s your turn.”
“What?”
“You have to answer.”
Answer? Dohyeong’s eyes widened. As if he couldn’t understand what he meant at all, he looked at Haesung.
“Answer….”
“Whether it’s okay for me to misunderstand.”
At that question, Dohyeong’s eyes shook finely. Instantly his face reddened, and his heart beat loudly.
Seeing that, Haesung’s breath became rough. Heavy woody-scented pheromones filled the room.
There’s no omega who doesn’t react to an alpha’s pheromones. In an instant, heat rose, and both of them were flinching.
“Hyung, wait—”
“Answer.”
Haesung didn’t give him a gap. With his other hand, he embraced Dohyeong’s waist and pulled him toward himself, and put strength into the hand holding his face so he couldn’t avoid his gaze.
“Answer me.”
It wasn’t that he didn’t want to grant the persistent request.
He just felt like he’d cross a river of no return depending on his answer.
That thing he was completely unaware of, absolutely didn’t know, and didn’t notice even after going through numerous processes.
“…Hyung.”
He felt like he’d realize that thing—what he was upset about, asking why he couldn’t feel it and why Haesung couldn’t feel it.
He put strength between his teeth with an anxious heart.
But at his gaze, his mouth moves on its own.
The emotions boiling throughout his body were pushing his back, saying he must speak.
It urges that if not now, there will be no opportunity, that such a moment won’t come again.
In the end, he spits it out without even calming his trembling breath.
“Hyung, you’re not mistaken.”
And he realized.
“I hate it.”
The fact that Jung Haesung is his mate.
Staying together in the same space, untangling aged emotions and misunderstandings with unfinished stories, and finally making eye contact and becoming honest in this moment.
This feeling of his whole body boiling so much it seems like it’ll burst was certain.
Haesung is his mate. The sense that hadn’t manifested until now was pouring out like a waterfall.
“I hate being… nothing to you now.”
Haesung was feeling the same emotion as Dohyeong.
His teeth itched. He wanted to bite the back of his neck right now, leave a mark saying he’s his, and make Kim Dohyeong Jung Haesung’s.
The heat and rut should still be far away. Why does he want to pin him under himself and violate him messily like this?
Why does he want to make him his possession this much?
Looking back, perhaps his heart had been closed until now, so he didn’t notice.
The kid next door, still immature emotions, his heart that became arrogant at Dohyeong’s gaze looking up at him.
All those things must have been blocking his emotions. He, too, wouldn’t have even thought to remove them.
In the end, without deciding who goes first, their lips locked.
Is it their hearts that are entangling, or only their breaths that couldn’t get tangled until now?
He couldn’t know, but one thing was certain.
The fact that they wanted to melt into each other.
They tightly held hands and embraced each other as if holding onto their bodies, trying to resolve the heat that touched.
Haa, the two people who released a long breath and separated their mouths made eye contact again.
“…Hyung.”
One word mixed with a thin breath pierced deep into Haesung’s chest.
He should have heard the answer, but he didn’t have the leisure.
The moment he tried to swallow the slightly parted lips, Dohyeong’s hand blocked Haesung’s mouth.
He quietly stared at him. Starting from the hand blocking his mouth, moving his gaze along the thin arm, the destination was already around Dohyeong’s collarbone.
Going up a little more, his favorite part. The line connecting his neck and jaw is visible.
Dohyeong’s neckline is slender. It had delicate lines as if made exactly for Haesung to bury his face.
“Hyung, we—”
His delicate body that seemed like it would break at any moment also seemed to remember Haesung’s touch. His finely trembling body was held by him.
“It’s okay. It’s okay. Dohyeong-ah.”
He knows what he’s afraid of. That’s why Haesung carefully stroked Dohyeong’s back and lifted him onto his lap.
Such an honest yet upright body. He presses firmly with his fingertips going up the neatly extended spine. Hot breaths were still going back and forth through their locked lips.
It seems he worked out quite diligently. The thigh touching his palm was quite firm.
Haesung, who bit Dohyeong’s lower lip slightly and separated, chuckled.
“You worked out hard.”
“Why?”
“Because you got firm.”
“Ah….”
Dohyeong looked at his thigh tightly gripped by Haesung’s hand, then smiled faintly.
“Quite, a lot.”
“You’ll endure well.”
“What… will I endure well?”
At Dohyeong’s voice asking curiously, Haesung rolled up the corner of his mouth.
Smack, smack. Haesung’s lips touched and separated from various places on Dohyeong’s face. At the clear friction sound, his toes just curled and straightened several times.
Haesung, who made eye contact, gripped his legs even harder.
“You’re playing dumb.”
“…Hyung!”
Haesung laughed out loud and buried his face in Dohyeong’s neckline again.
He felt like his eyes would roll back at any moment from the vividly gushing pheromones.
But now he was absorbed in thoroughly savoring Dohyeong’s body scent. He was happy with just this moment alone.
“Dohyeong-ah.”
At the following call, Dohyeong slightly turned his head.
“Today… shall we be together?”
At that moment, Dohyeong, who had been flinching, pushed him as if trying to get down from Haesung’s lap.
However, Haesung wasn’t one to let go obediently. While tightly holding his legs and waist, he only lifted his head slightly.
“Want to be together?”
“No, but still—”
“I want to be together.”
This is cheating.
Dohyeong chewed hard on his lower lip with his bright red face.
He’d never shown this kind of appearance before. Speaking in a whiny way like this was his role.
Seeing Haesung’s round eyes, he was at a loss for words again.
“If you don’t want to.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to.”
Dohyeong, who had been hesitating, glanced at Haesung and opened his mouth.
“…I’m being conscious of it.”
“Why are you being conscious?”
“It’d be stranger not to be.”
“Why, because I’m your ex-husband?”
At Haesung’s words, Dohyeong glared.
It’s the truth so he can’t refute it. And even though he knows his true feelings, he’s throwing out such blatant jokes—why is he so annoying today?
At such an appearance from Dohyeong, Haesung, who let out a light laugh, took out his phone from his pocket.
Meanwhile, Dohyeong was deeply embraced by Haesung. Unlike himself, it’s a firm, solid shoulder.
What expression would Haesung make if he said he’d wanted to be held in this embrace since some point?
If he said there were nights when he occasionally needed this shoulder.
He exhales a thin breath while mulling over all kinds of thoughts.
Somehow, tonight seemed like it would be very long.
