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SELF-DESTRUCTIVE LOVE v3c4

Chris recalled Yuri always reading books at the antiquarian bookshop. He had been curious why he was playing the role of a bookshop owner in the first place, but perhaps he had been performing missions that were difficult for Chris to guess while also gathering materials.

It was truly a life without rest for even a moment.

“The enemy can enter through ports, but I don’t send organization members to all those places. White Night doesn’t have overflowing power.”

Yuri’s voice was cold.

“Moreover, if the other side figures out the number of personnel here and pushes in, it would literally be a dog’s death. Depending on the season, the sea freezes completely, which is fortunate.”

The cold becomes a natural barrier.

“If they push in blatantly, we can notice it, but it’s difficult to catch everything when they bring things in little by little, hiding them like this. There are also cases of transporting through civilians.”

Yuri’s voice seemed to smell of blood as he said this.

The abandoned port Chris had discovered didn’t have any White Night organization members stationed there.

Gillian and Aparna weren’t caught or killed by Yuri’s hand.

It must have been done by the organization that traffics drugs in and out of the November Continent behind Yuri’s back.

How cunning—they commit all the crimes but White Night receives the misunderstanding. Didn’t Team Crow, who had just lost their comrades, feel anger toward White Night?

“Don’t you feel wronged being misunderstood when you’re working this hard for the security of the November Continent?”

“How many times have I been framed? And it’s not a misunderstanding.”

Yuri looked at Chris as if seeing something quite naive.

“It was deliberately pinned on me.”

He had a vague idea who the subject that had pinned that false accusation was, even without asking.

The only organization monopolizing the communication network connecting continent to continent.

The guardian of a more valuable future, Northern Light.

“Around here.”

Chris pointed out the port he had learned about on the map Yuri had spread out.

“There’s an abandoned port. Two of my colleagues lost their trail here, and looking at it now, it seems they were taken by the group distributing drugs on the November Continent. Since they can brainwash with Guiding drugs, the two might still be alive.”

It was hard to gauge whether this should be called hopeful or unfortunate.

Yuri slightly narrowed his brow at the part where Chris mentioned “colleagues” and sighed.

“You seem to be mistaken by only seeing the ones who are almost at the healing stage, but not all addicted Espers return to daily life.”

“…I’m just considering the possibilities. There’s no harm in holding onto hope.”

Between the two of them, there existed as much difference as between a child who learned Santa Claus is fake and a child who still hangs stockings on the tree.

“Hope is a more fragile emotion than you think.”

Yuri was making a statement grounded in reality rather than being cynical. Since he couldn’t fathom the world Yuri had experienced from where he stood now, Chris kept his mouth shut.

The more he experienced, the more questions accumulated.

Why did a rational and clever person like Yuri Sobolev turn Northern Light into his enemy? Knowing it was fighting against overwhelming odds, how many difficulties had there been from gathering power from the bottom and creating White Night to becoming the ruler of the November Continent? Did the reasons for not stopping his revenge include the cause that created his cleanliness obsession…?

Questions followed one after another. However, Chris didn’t voice any of them.

Because he felt he knew how arduous the process had been until nothing but that fragile hope remained for that man.

“I’ll send separate surveillance personnel to that port area. Thanks to you, I’ve identified one of the enemy’s strongholds.”

Yuri asked Chris with a face as if suddenly remembering:

“How does it feel to be a traitor?”

***

Chris, who got off at the tram station, moved his steps and headed to the re-education center where Andrea was.

Coming outside, he found that a fortnight had passed since he was captured by White Night.

I thought three months might have passed.

Time had flowed terribly slowly inside there.

Originally Chris had planned to meet Yont first. However, if a missing agent suddenly appeared from District 4, everyone would be on guard first. Therefore, he planned to go through Andrea first and package it as being “found” by her.

And Andrea sent me to District 4 while she herself went to a place called Black Pit.

Though he hadn’t heard exactly where Black Pit was, it was a place where drugs were traded. Andrea, who would have finished investigating sufficiently while he disappeared, would know information he didn’t.

Chris, who headed to the place where Andrea had set up shop among Aurum City’s various re-education centers, heard unexpected news from a staff member.

“She left?”

“Yes. Andrea was an excellent trainee so everyone liked her, but after submitting an outing permit, she never came back.”

The staff member answered matter-of-factly that it was sudden but a common occurrence.

This was a disaster.

“If she didn’t return, what happened to Andrea’s belongings?”

“A person claiming to be her uncle came and collected them. The closest relative, apparently. They didn’t look alike to me at all… But the paperwork was all in order, so it’s memorable.”

The staff member muttered that they were surprised because perfect family relationship documents were rather rare on the Winter Continent.

The person who collected Andrea’s belongings appeared to be Yont. If Jay had moved, he could have transformed into Andrea herself, so there would have been no need to claim to be a third party. Then there would be no need to prepare something like family relationship certificates and could have just smoothed it over.

Somehow, an uneasy thought arose that Andrea might have also gone missing like Gillian and Aparna.

Most of all—

Why did the team leader himself handle it directly instead of Jay?

To hide the situation of team members going missing one after another?

The Yont Günter that Chris knew was not that kind of leader. He was the type to face things head-on rather than avoid his own responsibility. But there was no way he would have secretly concealed Andrea’s traces without anyone knowing…

Suddenly, Fortuna’s memory flashed through his mind.

‘Esper Team 1 Leader’

At Northern Light, illegalities Chris didn’t know about were being committed. How could he be certain how far and where the rot extended?

The faith that had already been broken once taught Chris how to doubt.

He judged that Yont had some kind of circumstances, but couldn’t completely set aside the possibility that he harbored different intentions.

“Thank you.”

Chris bowed his head in greeting and left the center. Since naturally making contact through Andrea had failed, he had no choice but to go meet Yont after all.

His head was neatly organizing what needed to be done, but Chris’s feelings were complicated.

Last night, Yuri had spoken as if Northern Light was behind the drug dealers they were chasing. Chris had responded pretending not to know.

‘…I’m telling you about the place where those presumed to be drug dealers come and go, not Northern Light.’

Fortunately, Yuri didn’t probe further or press Chris. He simply let him go and stood up from his seat as if telling him to rest for tomorrow’s schedule.

During the sleepless night, Chris struggled to convince himself that Northern Light and the drug dealers were separate organizations. Originally Chris had been chasing drug dealers anyway. If Northern Light was behind distributing drugs to the November Continent and Yont was cooperating with it, he would have guided Chris’s investigation in a different direction.

So handing over the port’s location to Yuri was not betrayal.

Even though he had reached his own conclusion, his heart pounded like a child caught doing something bad.

Chris, who boarded the tram heading to District 4 mixed among ordinary people, felt the gazes of people passing by sting. As if he was wearing a scarlet letter of having committed betrayal.

Can I really return to Northern Light?

Though he vaguely thought he should return to where he belonged, that was closer to inertia.

Because of the prohibition, he had no choice but to follow Yuri’s orders, but in the end Chris had betrayed Northern Light. No matter how things turned out, it would be difficult to remain there.

He fixed his gaze on the scenery moving beyond the tram window. While capturing the landscape of Aurum City that swayed together with each jolt of the vehicle, Chris deliberately avoided his own haggard eyes reflected in the window.

He thought of Northern Light. The June Continent and its center, Joon.

Warm year-round with the sun beating down, crops growing endlessly, making it abundant. Precious fruits overflow here, and people cheerfully go up and down the streets in colorful, light clothing.

SELF-DESTRUCTIVE LOVE

SELF-DESTRUCTIVE LOVE

Status: Completed Released: 2 Free Chapter Every Thursday
Due to tectonic shifts, the world was divided into twelve continents, each named after the months from January to December. Among them was the November Continent, under the control of the infamous mafia boss Yuri Sobolev. There lived an S-rank Esper, Chris Danil. And the public called Chris Danil 'Yuri's hunting dog.' ------------------------------------- The moment their eyes met again, his chest heaved violently. Not from fear, but from some unknown emotion. In truth, he had been overwhelmed by all sorts of feelings from the start, making it difficult for him to even gauge what he was thinking. "You don't seem to remember, but we owe each other a debt." It was a gentle explanation, considering how ambiguous everything was. "You'd better give up any thoughts of running away. I'm the type who chases debts to the very end to collect them." Looking into those darkly sunken violet eyes, Chris suddenly realized. This sensation that remained as pure joy for him had been merely a terrible ordeal for the other.

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