Screech, a sharp needle tore through skin with a pearly, clear luster. A fresh red stream of blood connected in a single line. Round and round, transparent liquid beaded up.
Thump thump, his heart trembled. Why, why was he like this? In truth, was he afraid? That with that drug he could really become a beta? What would happen to him if he wasn’t an omega? What if he became something that was neither omega nor beta?
Woonghee faced the unknown fear he’d buried, that he absolutely couldn’t confront.
In truth, what he feared most was something else.
Then what about Gi Junhyuk? Would that man turn his back on him? He still hadn’t properly heard that answer…
The medical staff’s eyes widened round. As if they would pop out. They murmured as if they’d never seen a patient like this.
…What are you doing acting so willfully, if the patient gives up the opportunity they’ll have to wait for their turn again, they tried to persuade Woonghee.
But none of it entered his ears properly.
[Come back anytime if you change your mind.]
Woonghee pulled out a wad of cash from his wallet as if throwing it. Then rushed out hurriedly as if someone would grab him.
Even though he’d suffered like a dog to earn that money, that kind of thing didn’t matter at all now.
He passed through the corridor as if someone was chasing him. His whole body was soaked in cold sweat. Drip drip, sweat drops flowed as if he’d just escaped from water. He headed to the bathroom. He clung to the sink and scrubbed his forearm hard with water. Afraid that even a little of the drug might have penetrated his skin, he twisted and wrung his forearm for no reason.
“Haa…”
What the fuck am I doing? A sudden sense of futility washed over him. He looked into the angular mirror. His white skin had a clear sheen circling it like he’d cracked open a shell and extracted a pearl. A plump redness lingered on his lips.
It was a face he fucking hated. Because he thought it was hopeless to live ordinarily with this washbasin face, going unnoticed like others. Whenever he had a chance, he’d scrub it roughly with a green scrubbing towel and even cut his eyelashes short.
He loathed it to death, but the man loved it.
Thank goodness, that it was still that same face. He was so relieved that he still had the face the man loved.
Trudge trudge, he came out like a defeated soldier. Then his powerless steps stopped abruptly. In front of the building, with a black sedan behind him, a man was standing.
“……”
It was Gi Junhyuk. He was looking down at the Patek Philippe watch he loved, checking the time. The black bonnet glowed red in the burning sun.
While the man and Woonghee gazed at each other for a moment, the whispering sounds around them grew louder. He was sucking in all the attention around him like a black hole, as always.
You, you who lack nothing, what exactly about me attracted you?
Is the love you give really love? Me, who without your gaze is no different from weeds blooming on the roadside.
Bathed in the evening glow, he approached magnificently.
“Did you go?”
The man asked. Woonghee unconsciously gripped his forearm. Where the injection mark would remain, the mark of his hesitation.
“I actually…”
He wanted to say he couldn’t get it. That he thought of you, that because of you Gi Junhyuk he ended up giving up, that big money, that precious opportunity he’d missed…
And at that moment, those endlessly cold eyes pierced Woonghee’s forearm. Right, as expected this man hated Woonghee becoming a beta.
Perhaps you were lucky to be drawn to me. To me, who was the only omega on that cramped island.
The thought that expanded fiercely,
“No, it’s not.”
Woonghee soon shook his head. That it was nothing. Instead of saying nothing has changed for us, he chose silence. The man was just quietly watching Woonghee.
His gaze beat down on Woonghee like the sun.
“Shall we walk a bit.”
The evening glow was spreading like a red carpet. Woonghee stared as if enchanted at the beautiful man walking into it. Soon he followed and took a step.
What was he thinking now? From his slowly walking shoe steps, a wordless hesitation could be felt. What exactly did he want to say? Woonghee couldn’t even dare to guess.
“Is it because.”
Soon a voice burst from his back ahead.
“Is it because I’m not an ordinary man?”
It was a voice layered with regret like damp fog. Lee Woonghee stopped abruptly in place. What the hell does that mean? He couldn’t bring himself to answer his words. He just blankly stared at the broad back stretching the shirt taut.
He slowly turned his head toward him.
“So I can’t fit into your ordinary life?”
Vroom, with a loud sound a large truck whooshed past beside them. The man who momentarily staggered grabbed his shoulder. That shoulder that had been horribly shattered, that was only now barely starting to heal. Only his left side was moving freely now, while on his right shoulder bandages draped down into his chest.
“Are, are you okay?”
Woonghee quickly approached and supported him, but the man showed an expression like somewhere other than his unhealed shoulder hurt more. It wasn’t only the other humans who were suffering from PTSD. He was the same. Woonghee could now understand. That the human Gi Junhyuk was just an ordinary human.
“Gi Junhyuk-ssi.”
Then he called him softly. He brought out those words he absolutely couldn’t say in front of him, that his mouth absolutely wouldn’t open to say.
“If I’m not an omega.”
Vroooom, an explosive exhaust sound shook the two of them as if it would tear them apart.
“What am I to you?”
“What?”
Even knowing he was looking down at him, he couldn’t raise his head. Woonghee, who’d been glaring only at his own fidgeting shoes, finally poured out what he’d hidden inside as if bursting it all at once.
“If I become a beta…!”
Whiiish, cars quickly passed by to the side, shaking Woonghee’s body. His light brown hair flew, his clothes fluttered.
“If I’m not an omega, tell me what I am to you.”
“You’d be Lee Woonghee.”
Whether he knew or didn’t know his boiling feelings. He was cruelly nonchalant. Water flows, and corpses will rot someday. Even if that sunset sets now, tomorrow’s sun will rise again tomorrow. It was a voice like he was spouting such obvious things.
Right, he would be Lee Woonghee. Woonghee was looking at the sunset floating in the man’s eyes. He was a man who suited the burning sunset like a single painting.
“Do you think I fell for you because Lee Woonghee-ssi is an omega?”
Yes, that was exactly it. That point kept Woonghee from sleeping all along. It made him stop abruptly even while eating, even while walking. The whole world was teeming with thoughts of you. He was extremely anxious that you might say you’d leave him.
It was all because of you. All of this was because of you, Gi Junhyuk. Didn’t you ultimately make him pull out himself even the injection that was his lifelong wish? Like an idiot, a moron, a dimwit bastard.
He let out a deflated laugh, ha, then covered his mouth with his large hand.
“Right, there are dirt-cheap omegas everywhere in the world. If you pick one of them, wash them well and dress them up, they’d be tolerable enough.”
Woonghee silently watched him.
“I liked it when Lee Woonghee-ssi fainted.”
“……”
“I liked how you’d faint when I tried to step on you, and struggle when I tried to crush you.”
On the gray concrete overpass, white cars, the pitch-black road. The man bathed in the red sunset like the wick in the deepest part of a flame stood with more intense color than anyone else in Woonghee’s world.
“Do you understand what I’m saying?”
Step, he approached him. Woonghee didn’t blink even once and took him all into his eyes completely.
“I don’t care whether Lee Woonghee is a beta or an omega.”
His large hand gripped Woonghee’s wrist firmly. Like ivy, it wound tightly around his skin.
“You’re the one who seemed to be trying to cut off abnormal me somehow.”
Those words seemed to say that whatever he was, whatever you were, our form wouldn’t change.
“Gi Junhyuk-ssi.”
So Woonghee carefully called him. Thump thump, his heart trembled.
“Whether I’m an omega or not an omega…”
The rest of the words seemed to be almost swallowed down his throat, but he forced them out with difficulty.
“Can you be part of my ordinary life?”
The man gazed at Woonghee with eyes burning like the sunset. Woonghee was relieved by that gaze. Because he now knew that sun setting beyond you would rise again tomorrow and illuminate that sky.
“…What exactly do you mean by that?”
Woonghee held out what he’d gripped in his hand. It was a ring. He knew that although he’d emptied all his assets to buy it, it was ridiculously cheap compared to what the man wore and put on.
“Even if you become a cripple who can’t use your arm.”
Still, because he felt like he could no longer dream of a life without you, Woonghee squeezed out his courage. The hand holding out the ring trembled. It was as if he was tearing open his chest and showing his heart. Thump thump, it must be beating fresh red with blood flowing like a freshly caught fish.
“It means I’ll support you even if I have to run errands for a living.”
