I’m not drunk. I’m not drunk, I said.
Siwoo’s hand flailed through the air to retrieve the glass that had been taken. But the liquor glass moved away from him and settled in front of Evan.
Now’s the opportunity. Since there’s no one around, it seems I should speak clearly. Though it happened because of filming, I should definitely address Evan’s kiss before the kiss, when filming according to the original concept.
“You.”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t acknowledge me.”
“That’s shocking?”
Even at Siwoo’s tremendous threat, Evan chuckled and emptied the soju glass placed in front of him. His expression saying it was shocking was more peaceful than ever.
“I said don’t acknowledge me.”
“Really?”
“What if others find out? I don’t like that. You and me. Just the two of us.”
“You want to have a secret relationship?”
“Yeah!”
By Evan’s standards, Siwoo couldn’t hold his liquor well. He smoothly ate the meat given to him, talked well with the members. While also drinking well.
As a result, right now Siwoo’s two cheeks were flushed, and his pupils were larger than usual. He probably thought he was sitting upright with his body straight, but he swayed slightly.
At the words asking if he wanted a secret relationship, seeing him smile broadly while nodding his head greatly just made him laugh. Even during this conversation, their feet were touching under the table.
“How can I win against you.”
When they first met again, it was difficult to feel pheromones from Siwoo or read his emotions. Though it wasn’t as clearly felt as before, a strong plum scent that stimulated him wafted from drunk Siwoo.
“Coco.”
“Yeah?”
Siwoo, who had his chin resting on the table, looked at Evan while slightly tilting his head back.
“Pretty.”
“You always just say pretty. That’s right! Pretty. Really pretty, right?”
You’re definitely drunk. The usual Siwoo would never say such things. The appearance of the one who used to look up clearly with black hair and black eyes had changed.
Flashy platinum blonde hair with bright blue eyes, heavy makeup. Seems like a completely different person, but he was Siwoo. Evan slowly rose from his seat. Looking at him like this, his thirst became worse.
Delicious, the most delicious plum in the world, I want to eat it.
The plum right in front of me.
“Hyung, they’re saying we should go in first. The staff said they’ll drink more. You finished eating, right? Is Siwoo hyung drunk? Hyung, are you okay?”
He was going to sit in the seat next to him, not across from him. He was thinking of using the excuse that Siwoo was drunk and slightly swaying to hug him. But the one who moved first was the innocent Yechan.
As Yechan’s hand grabbed Siwoo’s shoulder as he rested his chin on the table, his gaze, which had been blinking slowly, landed on Yechan.
And he smiles again. He stood up saying he was fine but staggered slightly, and Yechan embraced him.
“I’ve never seen you admit you’re drunk. Let’s go.”
Even though Yechan was taking Siwoo out, Evan just stood there in that spot. At that moment, irritation surged up. Siwoo wants a secret relationship. That means having to see this kind of situation countless times.
Evan emptied another soju glass while standing. And as Evan ran his hand through his hair and followed them, his face was filled with deep irritation.
I need to find a way, a way.
* * *
“What are you two doing?”
“What do you mean?”
Evan, who had comfortably buried his tired body in the chair, chuckled at Chan’s question. Because he seemed to know what he was asking. But honestly, with his current mood, laughing wasn’t really laughing.
“You and Siwoo.”
“Why us?”
Right now in this van, it was just Evan and Chan.
When Evan followed them outside the restaurant, Siwoo, who had been dodging around desperately like a rabbit, had already left first in another car with Yechan and Sangjun.
“Us? Us? It seems a bit off since England. Before, it seemed like you two didn’t care about each other at all, but earlier I saw him dodging you desperately, is that more because of that filming earlier?”
At Chan’s pointed words mixed with dialect intonation, Evan opened his closed eyes. Even while asking such a question, Chan was looking out the window, not at him. He was the most suitable person to be leader. Until now, he had been the leader, but somehow this time Chan was the leader.
When he learned that fact, rather than being surprised or finding it strange, Evan thought they had chosen the most suitable person well. Consideration, understanding, even tolerance. Even though he always seemed to be one step behind, he understood everything. And he knew how to lead conversations like this, targeting the right timing.
“Probably something like that?”
“You should have at least said something. Siwoo seems calm but he’s sensitive. Seeing him clench his teeth after hearing one word from you and practically pull all-nighters for almost two days to complete the performance, geez, I thought he’s not human. He was clearly surprised earlier too, but he didn’t say anything in case the atmosphere got weird. You do better, man.”
“I’m trying to. My heart keeps getting ahead of me and I keep making it like this every time.”
Evan rubbed his palm on his thigh for no reason with a bitter expression. Just a few days ago. Siwoo had been on his thigh. The emotions rippling from that small body. The flushed face and irregular breathing. And he felt pheromones stronger than ever.
So sweet it seemed to have pickled his brain, he almost let go of everything at that thick and seductive scent. If it hadn’t been for Myunghun’s call… Just recalling that situation brought back the sensations, and Evan dry-washed his face.
“Anyway, you seem to have gotten closer, so what if it gets awkward again. So I prepared a very special gift. I wanted to surprise both of you, but I’ll tip you off first.”
On the way from the restaurant back to the dorm.
An in-depth conversation between moderately drunk Chan and Evan took place inside the van.
Mainly Chan talked, Evan listened, and manager Daehwan, who was driving, occasionally chimed in.
* * *
“What kind of filming is it?”
Siwoo, who always spent time in the practice room on days without schedules, followed Daehwan who had suddenly come to pick him up saying there was filming. With the official release date for their 2nd album set for a few days later, the practice amount was adjusted a bit more leisurely for good condition.
After group choreography practice ended, Chan went to get a massage to relieve his tired body from continuous practice, and Sangjun headed to the studio. Since Evan went to the office and Yechan went to exercise, he was guarding the practice room alone.
“‘Ocean Story.'”
At Daehwan’s answer, Siwoo quickly pulled his clothes and sniffed them. Hey, if there’s filming, you should say so in advance.
“We’ll stop by the dorm briefly so you can wash up and grab some simple clothes, then go to the shop.”
“What’s today’s theme?”
“You’ll know when you go.”
“Huh? Then what about the other members? Yechan and Chan hyung are right now…”
“Unit filming.”
Siwoo, who got in the van, took off the hat he was wearing and lightly brushed his hair with his hand. ‘Ocean Story’ was mainly filmed as a complete group, but depending on the situation, unit filming also continued. There were cases where it was difficult to match all members’ schedules, and following fans’ needs, sometimes it was better for two or three people to move.
“Ah, then I’m wearing my own clothes too? You said to grab clothes earlier.”
“Yeah. Just dress comfortably in the style you like according to the weather.”
“But what are we filming? With Sangjun hyung?”
“Why do you have to know the theme to film? It’s probably going to some restaurant or something like that again.”
“Wasn’t Yechan the restaurant specialist?”
Conversing with Daehwan, Siwoo roughly thought in his head about the clothes he’d wear for today’s filming. No matter how or what situation he regressed to, his taste was upright like bamboo. Maybe that’s why it was more comfortable.
“Right. They said you wanted to write lyrics.”
“What lyrics. It’s just… I do scribble, but it’s not like that.”
Seeing Daehwan mention what he’d discussed with Sangjun, it seemed all the direct stakeholders probably knew about it.
Does Evan know too? As Evan’s face suddenly came to mind, Siwoo quickly shook his head.
Maintaining a good relationship with him, becoming intimate, all of that was good. Yeah, he fully intended to enjoy a romance with Evan. But Evan had no sense of time or place and didn’t care about others at all.
So what could he do? He had to dodge around. Honestly, if their relationship wasn’t that good, but they suddenly stick together and look intimate, it’s easy to cause misunderstandings. Couldn’t they just appropriately act like members of the same group and then when they’re alone together, do whatever?
Living like this, it seemed like instead of a secret relationship, they’d have a stupid fool’s relationship where it’s public but only the parties involved don’t know.
“Yeah, work hard at it. Sangjun said he’ll help you too. If you want to release a single, release it.”
“What single. I’m just practicing bit by bit.”
In the past, he had thought about making a self-composed song. He’d only thought about it, and it was one of the things he hadn’t challenged during the regressions that had repeated until now.
A few days ago, the moment he heard the soft ballad rhythm Sangjun created, he wanted to put his thoughts into that song. So he carefully sat next to Sangjun.
‘Hyung. Am I bothering you while you work?’
‘Not particularly. Why? Do you have something to say?’
‘No. I just really liked that rhythm.’
‘You like it?’
‘Yes. Do you have lyrics in mind?’
‘Not yet. I’ll have to think about it now.’
After the conversation ended like that, Sangjun continued his work, and Siwoo sat quietly on one side.
‘Want to try?’
‘What?’
‘Want to try putting lyrics to this?’
‘Come on, how could I do something like that?’
‘What can’t you do? Just put in what comes to mind.’
That’s how it started. But after that day, Siwoo hadn’t been able to write even a single line.
