Chapter 49
“Chanhee named you?”
Go Hankyul looked surprised, and Yu Hyunjae nodded with a smile.
“But why did he name you Hyunjae?”
Yu Hyunjae glanced at me. There was no way he could remember the reason—I hadn’t even named him. It was only natural that he didn’t know. As I hesitated, unsure of how to answer, Yu Hyunjae spoke up for me.
“I was just a kid back then… I don’t think I put that much thought into it.”
I nodded absentmindedly. When I thought about it, his words made sense. What could a five-year-old Yu Chanhee have known to give such a meaningful name?
***
Go Hankyul turned out to be nosier and more sociable than I expected. He knew not just about me and Yu Hyunjae, but all sorts of details about our classmates. As I listened to him rattle off information about people I didn’t even care about, I blurted out without thinking:
“You really are a nice guy.”
“Me?”
Go Hankyul scratched his cheek, looking embarrassed by the sudden compliment. It wasn’t even that great of a compliment, but he seemed like the type to react genuinely. I decided to provoke him a little.
“You could just hang out with the other kids. Why me?”
Go Hankyul shrugged, unfazed.
“I just liked you from the start.”
His blunt answer caught me off guard. I’d been ready to pounce on any vague response, but this was a defense I couldn’t argue with. Go Hankyul poked at the cold chicken on his plate with a fork and kept talking.
“I saw you on the first day of school and thought we’d get along.”
“You could tell just by looking at my face?”
“People have intuition, you know.”
I let out an involuntary snort. Go Hankyul must have taken it as a positive reaction because he started laughing too. Whether he was Han Jaemin’s pawn or not, he was an infuriatingly straightforward guy.
I glanced at Yu Hyunjae, who was sitting beside me, curious about his reaction. He just chewed his food expressionlessly.
“Isn’t it dangerous to judge people based on intuition?”
Yu Hyunjae looked up at my words. Caught between their gazes, I didn’t know who to look at. Though I’d been talking to Go Hankyul, for some reason, Yu Hyunjae’s reaction felt more intense.
“Nothing’s more accurate than intuition.”
Go Hankyul answered firmly, then turned to Yu Hyunjae for agreement.
“Right, Hyunjae?”
Yu Hyunjae thought for a moment before nodding slowly.
“Yeah. You’re right.”
I noticed a slight heaviness in Yu Hyunjae’s voice.
“Well… you’re not entirely wrong.”
I hedged, glancing at Yu Hyunjae. I’d somehow said the wrong thing. To shift the mood, I deliberately raised my voice. Yu Hyunjae seemed distracted the whole time, which only made me more frustrated. I had no idea what was bothering him. His gloominess and my awkwardness made the atmosphere so obvious that even Go Hankyul couldn’t ignore it.
“Hyunjae seems upset.”
“Yeah. Are you feeling sick?”
“No.”
Yu Hyunjae sounded like a big dog with drooping ears. Not angry or seriously troubled—just… sulking.
***
On the walk home after parting ways with Go Hankyul, I kept wondering how to bring it up with Yu Hyunjae. What’s wrong? Nothing could’ve happened in that short time. Are you mad? Clearly not. Are you hurt? I’d already asked. In the end, there was only one question left.
“Are you sulking?”
Yu Hyunjae’s shoulders twitched at my blunt question. He seemed to flinch. Even though he was so tall that all I could see was the back of his neck, I could tell it was flushed. He coughed awkwardly, embarrassed.
“No, not really.”
“Then just answer when I ask you something.”
“I said I’m not.”
“Don’t lie.”
I stopped myself from adding, I’ve known you for so long. Because only I could feel the weight of that “so long.” Yu Hyunjae hesitated, rubbing his face repeatedly as if even admitting this much was embarrassing.
“I just… feel like I’m the only one who remembers.”
“Huh?”
His words didn’t make sense, so I asked again.
“The meaning behind the name you gave me, and all that.”
“Oh.”
So there was a reason. I tried to hide my awkwardness and licked my dry lips. The meaning behind the name Yu Hyunjae? I had no idea. Since it wasn’t in the original novel, I’d assumed it was meaningless. Would it be weird if I said I didn’t remember? Would Yu Hyunjae start doubting me?
“Intuition.”
Yu Hyunjae continued. I tilted my head, waiting for him to go on.
“I’m only with you because of my intuition.”
“Oh.”
“Even now, walking with you like this… I think it’s all because of my own feelings.”
I nodded. He was right. Yu Hyunjae, who’d been tormented by Yu Chanhee for years, had suddenly opened up to me at some point—all because of his own intuition and emotions. Even if I suspected the system’s invisible influence, he believed it was his own choice.
“Uh…”
I drew out the word, struggling to speak. But I tried my best to sound sincere.
“I’m sorry.”
Yu Hyunjae looked at me. Despite the apology, I couldn’t help smiling. I realized how long it had been since I’d genuinely smiled.
“Honestly, I forgot why I named you.”
“I figured.”
“But know this.”
“…”
“I remember. More than you think.”
Yu Hyunjae blinked at me, his eyes widening slightly before crinkling into a warm curve. I couldn’t remember the last time we’d smiled at each other like this. Even if it was just for a moment, it felt like this page could outweigh all the painful past ones.
“Even if I don’t remember, just know I remember more than you think.”
“Like what?”
Hmm. I paused to think.
“That’s a secret.”
“A secret?”
“A secret, but I’ll tell you one thing.”
I still held his gaze as I spoke clearly. His pupils trembled slightly.
“Even if we remember different things, I’m still me.”
Whether I was the real Yu Chanhee or a Yu Chanhee from some other life—after everything, I’d chosen to stand before him. I just wanted him to know that.
***
“About the name.”
I couldn’t stop thinking about the name I’d supposedly given Yu Hyunjae. It bothered me that I, the one who’d named him, didn’t know, and I also wanted to understand why he cherished it so much.
“How did I name you?”
Yu Hyunjae let out a small ah and smiled faintly.
“I was only five. It wasn’t anything grand.”
“If it wasn’t grand, why were you sulking?”
“I wasn’t sulking…”
Yu Hyunjae protested weakly. I pulled my hand out of my jacket pocket and patted his back. Sure, sure. I’ll pretend you’re not.
“So what was this grand reason?”
“I took one character from each of my parents’ names.”
It was simpler than I expected. But for Yu Hyunjae, who’d lost his parents early, it might have been deeply meaningful. At the same time, I thought the five-year-old Yu Chanhee who’d named him was pretty clever.
“Back then, I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t use my old name.”
“Why couldn’t you?”
“I’m not sure. Dohyun just…”
At the mention of Yu Dohyun’s name, Yu Hyunjae exhaled.
“Dohyun told me never to say my old name out loud. No matter who asked, I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone.”
“Really? Why?”
“I don’t know. Maybe that’s why the name I have now means more.”
I looked at Yu Hyunjae, puzzled. Why would Yu Dohyun make him hide his old name? Now that I thought about it, it was odd that he’d given him a new name with the same surname. I’d assumed it was just because he’d taken in a nameless kid, but Yu Dohyun’s actions suggested otherwise.
“Your dad’s name had Hyun in it?”
I asked casually, trying to hide my thoughts. Yu Hyunjae nodded.
“Yeah. His name was Hyunmin.”
I froze mid-step. My throat tightened as I slowly repeated:
“His name was Hyunmin?”
“Yeah. Kim Hyunmin. My mom was Lee Heejae.”
Only one thought crossed my mind:
Why does it always have to be like this?
