# Chapter 82
Kay stared at Fenil in bewilderment. He had never thought that someone might know he was living on borrowed time. But Fenil knew. And not just about his limited time—she knew everything.
No, perhaps saying she “knew” wasn’t even accurate. From the beginning, everything had been Fenil’s plan. Even the things he had believed were coincidences.
How was he supposed to process this? Kay’s gaze shifted to Fenil, who was looking down, lost in thought. It would have been better if he could feel anger at her for using him. But something larger than anger was churning inside him. Emotions he had forcibly suppressed now threatened to burst forth. The more he thought about it, the more a crushing sadness, like utter defeat, washed over him.
He had thought he was finally okay. How much longer would he be swept away by these emotions?
“How… is this possible?”
His consistently impassive face began to crumble like shattered glass. Undisguisable sorrow spilled from his previously expressionless features. Eyes filled with lonely despair stared at Fenil.
His vision was filled with her guilt-ridden figure.
Fenil’s gaze remained fixed on the floor. Kay’s trembling voice only intensified her guilt. She wished he would just get angry at her instead.
But the glimpse she caught of Kay’s expression wasn’t anger—it was something entirely different. It was profound sadness. He was despairing and grieving like someone who had fallen to rock bottom. A dull pain crept into the corner of her heart. She finally opened her mouth and uttered what sounded like an excuse.
“To change Boss, I had to change you first.”
She knew these words wouldn’t make Kay feel better. But she hoped they would at least keep him from suffering further.
The more he thought about being used, the more painful it would be for him. Despite his pretense, Kay was someone who gave his affection easily. She wanted to clear up his misunderstanding, even if just a little.
Fenil slowly began to kneel before Kay. As one knee touched the floor, her eyes met his. It was a deliberate action to face him without avoidance.
Surprised by Fenil’s sudden movement, Kay quickly averted his gaze. At this sign that he didn’t want to look at her, Fenil gave a bitter smile.
“…What do you mean you saved me? How am I alive?”
That was what he was most curious about. How could someone who died come back to life? It wasn’t just Boss—even Fenil couldn’t have mistaken a dead person for a living one.
Although superpowers had existed for 100 years, he had never heard of anyone bringing the dead back to life. But without superpowers, there was no way he could be alive…
Kay frowned, expressing his frustration. Seeing his sharp demeanor, Fenil nodded as if she understood. It was something that defied common sense. It was natural that Kay couldn’t comprehend it.
“Besides gravity, Boss also has a superpower called Revive.”
“Revive?”
Kay tilted his head, hearing this ability for the first time. He tried to recall if he’d ever heard of such a power, but nothing came to mind. If Boss had ever mentioned it, he would have at least a vague memory of it—the fact that he didn’t meant Boss had never spoken of it.
He hadn’t even known Boss had two abilities. It made sense that Boss hadn’t mentioned Revive.
The feeling was as if ten years of his life had been rendered meaningless. He didn’t even properly know Boss’s abilities. Not just that—he didn’t even know something as basic as Boss’s real name. A hollow, bitter smile formed on Kay’s lips. The fact that he didn’t even know that much meant Boss hadn’t wanted to tell him. These ten years ultimately meant nothing to Boss.
Seeing Kay’s clearly unfavorable mood, Fenil maintained her silence. Only when he appeared to have calmed down a bit did she speak again.
“Revive is an ability that can resurrect a dead person, but only once.”
As she spoke, Fenil observed Kay’s reaction. This would undoubtedly be difficult for him to accept.
And as she had anticipated, Kay’s expression gradually darkened. He had already looked unwell, but now all color had drained from his face.
That’s how shocked Kay was. His eyes began to tremble violently. A superpower that could bring someone back to life? He had never heard or seen such a thing. The ability to interfere with life and death was widely considered fictional, existing only in legends. Kay had felt the same way. Although he had occasionally imagined such powers, he never believed they could actually exist.
Yet here was proof that an ability to resurrect the dead really existed. If this became public knowledge, it would cause worldwide upheaval.
Moreover, Fenil was saying Boss had used this ability on him. And it was a one-time-only ability.
His thought process seemed to freeze. Kay barely managed to move his stiff lips.
“Why would Boss use such a precious ability on me?”
Wasn’t he just a subordinate to Boss? Anyone could have replaced him, yet Boss had used his ability on him. The fact that it could only be used once made it all the more precious. Kay couldn’t understand why it had been used on him.
He knew Boss cared about him to some extent. But that was it. There was no value beyond that. He was just a useful subordinate, nothing more.
Kay furrowed his brow, revealing his confused emotions. In response, Fenil’s eyes curved downward as if she found him pitiful.
It was something anyone might imagine at some point—having someone they like return those feelings. But for Kay, such a possibility didn’t seem to exist.
That was understandable. Judging from Boss’s attitude all this time, Kay would have given up rather than think his feelings were reciprocated. If even she felt that way, it must be worse for Kay. What good would it do for him to recognize his own feelings hundreds or thousands of times after his death? The truth never reached the one who truly needed to know Boss’s feelings.
If only she could show Kay what Boss was like during the time he was gone. But she didn’t have such an ability, and it was something Boss needed to do himself. So Fenil offered the best words she could in her current position.
“You were precious enough to Boss that he brought you back to life.”
“That’s impossible. Boss always…”
Kay immediately denied her words. Precious? If that were true, he wouldn’t have ended up in this situation. He bit his lip repeatedly as he looked back at the fragments of the past that came flooding in like a deluge.
The pain had repeated day after day. Looking back now, the training was weak compared to actual torture, but it was still too intense for who he was then. Yet he endured it tenaciously for Boss’s sake. There were no words of praise, but that couldn’t be helped. He wanted Boss’s approval as quickly as possible. With that in mind, he gritted his teeth and endured.
And now to hear that this same person had considered him precious—even in his current mental disarray, he dismissed it as nonsense. Everyone had different ways of showing that they valued someone. But no one could possibly think Boss valued him.
Kay ultimately couldn’t accept Fenil’s words.
“…There’s no way I was precious to Boss.”
Though she had expected this response, his detached attitude made her heart ache even more. Fenil hastily spoke, trying somehow to convey the truth to him.
“Kay, aren’t you curious? About what happened after you died?”
Even if she told him, it was uncertain whether Kay would change. But she couldn’t leave him like this. Right now, Kay was in such a precarious situation that he could die at any moment. Fenil knew well that in this situation, only Boss could save him. So she had to tell Kay everything, hoping he would regain even a little hope.
Fortunately, Kay showed interest in her words. After a long silence, he cautiously opened his mouth.
“…Tell me. What happened afterward. What happened to me. Everything.”
Light began to seep into his pitch-black eyes. It was a faint light, but Fenil was satisfied with just that.
With a subtle smile, she began to tell him what had happened. How Boss had saved Kay, how Boss had treated the sleeping Kay, and even the incident at the abandoned factory that day.
As she continued her story, Kay appeared increasingly confused. After she had conveyed everything without omission, she concluded.
“That’s roughly what happened.”
Kay, who had been focusing on Fenil’s words throughout, relaxed his expression and sank into thought. To be honest, her words were difficult to accept. It was hard enough to believe that Boss had saved him, but to hear that Boss had broken down so completely?
When he heard that Boss had practically secluded himself in Kay’s home, he doubted whether this was really the Boss he knew.
That made sense, because Boss had never once neglected the organization’s affairs. He had always maintained “Alice” in the most perfect state no matter what happened, so it was hard to imagine him falling apart over the death of a mere subordinate.
Besides, there were still many other things that didn’t resonate with him. Especially the fact that he was alive still felt like fiction.
Perhaps it was because of what Boss had said, but he didn’t really think of this body as his own.
It was just a body with his appearance, no different from a stand-in. Things might change if he faced Boss, but that’s how he felt at present.
