“Mmm.”
The next day, Formo dawdled considerably and squirmed inside the blanket. After furrowing his brow, Formo slowly opened his eyes and looked up at the ceiling for a moment, recalling the ticklish events from yesterday. Remembering the deep embrace he’d shared with Serdin in the middle of the castle made his heart pound like crazy. And that wasn’t all. He’d even kissed Serdin’s cheek when he demanded a kiss. That was really an act of insanity even thinking about it again.
“In the end, I’ve been influenced by that terrible jaguar…”
Even if he could have the same feelings as Serdin and think of him as special, there was no need to even imitate his actions. It was when Formo, who had decided to firmly deal with Serdin next time he demanded kisses outdoors, was about to raise his upper body from the bed.
From somewhere, he felt a strange gaze enough to make his down feathers stand on end.
‘…No way.’
Formo’s head turned slowly. Soon, Formo’s body, having made eye contact with golden pupils, jumped in place.
“Y-you startled me!”
“Did you sleep well, Pipi?”
“Just when exactly did you wake up?”
“From when Pipi was wriggling inside the blanket?”
At Serdin’s answer, Formo’s face flushed red. That meant he’d heard everything he’d muttered to himself. Why did Serdin never miss the moments when he talked to himself? Formo was extremely troubled.
“But Pipi. What did I influence?”
At the question that came rushing in while he was distracted, Formo’s body flinched.
“I-it’s nothing.”
“Really?”
“Mm-hmm. Really.”
Serdin raised his eyebrows with a suspicious face, but didn’t ask again. Instead, he shrugged his shoulders with eyes that seemed to have quickly lost interest. Formo’s heart sank as he turned his head and discovered that gaze.
“Why, why?”
“Hm?”
“Why…”
Formo’s long eyelashes trembled. The indifference in Serdin’s pupils that he faced after their hearts connected felt unfamiliar enough to make his mind go blank for a moment. It was even frightening. Right now he’d lost interest in what he himself had asked about, but if the object of his lost interest became him…
Just imagining it made his insides churn. Was this the feeling of liking someone? If so, this emotion was too troublesome. The emotion that made him care about the other person every minute, every second, and made him tremble with anxiety over pointless things really came unexpectedly, suddenly, and shook Formo.
Formo lowered his gaze, feeling confusion, fear, and discomfort at an emotion he was experiencing for the first time in his life.
“Pipi, what did you dream about today?”
Serdin’s face as he asked that held inexplicable anticipation. Formo raised his gaze to make eye contact with him and answered quietly.
“I didn’t dream anything today.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
When Formo nodded and replied without a trace of hesitation, Serdin’s expression became subtle. He smacked his lips and slightly narrowed his brow as if something was disappointing.
“…Why?”
“Just because.”
Serdin answered with a shrug and raised his body from the bed. Serdin’s appearance, placing his feet on the floor and moving slowly, was truly a feline beast of prey itself. Formo followed Serdin’s leisurely, soundless walking with his eyes and swallowed his dry saliva for no reason.
Then suddenly a question came to mind.
‘Come to think of it… I’ve never seen his animal form.’
Just when exactly did Serdin transform into an animal? Did the longer the period spent as a beastman, the more comfortable the human form felt? Of course, if he faced Serdin in his jaguar state, it was obvious that he, being prey, would tremble violently the moment he saw Serdin in animal form following his instincts.
Still, he wanted to see Serdin’s true form someday. He was curious what Serdin in animal form would look like.
While he was thinking deeply alone like that, Serdin, who had somehow approached close by, suddenly stuck his face forward and asked.
“What are you thinking about so much, Pipi?”
“Uh, uah!”
Just like before, Formo, startled again this time too, glared at Serdin with fierce eyes.
“Why do you keep startling me?”
“Because Pipi being startled is cute.”
“You might think it’s a joke, but I…”
Formo, who was about to give him a piece of his mind, suddenly closed his mouth and let out a deep sigh. This was because he thought there was no point in saying anything now. Anyway, no matter what he said or how much he complained, Serdin acted the same, so what was the point of talking?
Rather, he might feel negative emotions like boredom toward him. To think that liking someone would be this uncomfortable and nerve-wracking. Formo inwardly lamented his situation of having to read someone’s mood, something he’d never done in his life, and tried to sneakily get up from his spot.
Then Serdin extended his arms and suddenly picked him up.
“Wh-what are you doing?”
Formo’s eyes widened while being held in Serdin’s arms. Being held in someone’s arms wasn’t something he was very used to. Moreover, even his legs were dangling… When he’d just become a beastman, he had no choice but to ask for and receive help, but now that he’d become accustomed to moving, it was a different story.
“P-put me down!”
“No.”
Serdin, who flatly rejected Formo’s request, walked as he was. At the sudden movement, Formo unconsciously wrapped his arms around Serdin’s neck. Every time Serdin took a step, Formo’s legs dangled and swayed in the air. Formo, who had been making a dissatisfied expression, was shocked to feel Serdin’s forearm muscles flexing in the crook of his knees.
“…Where are we going?”
He tried diligently to ignore the sensation he felt in the crook of his knees.
“To wash up.”
“I can go there by myself!”
“I know.”
“Then why, why are you doing this?”
At Formo’s question, Serdin stopped walking in front of the office door. Then he made eye contact with Formo, whose arms were wrapped around his neck, and opened his mouth.
“Because I like you.”
“…”
“I’m doing this because I like Pipi.”
Formo’s pupils shook left and right. His lower lip was also bitten tightly. Seeing Formo openly showing his flustered state, Serdin raised the corners of his mouth and walked again. Even until they reached the grand bath, Formo couldn’t open his mouth.
Only after Serdin reached out to personally remove his nightgown did he open his mouth to say he would do it himself.
“I’ll do it. I-I can do it!”
“Pipi, what is there to be embarrassed about between us?”
“Wh-what kind of relationship are we?”
Formo couldn’t let Serdin’s brazen words pass and asked back. In fact, even though their hearts had somewhat connected, that was all Formo could know. He was just vaguely feeling emotions, but he had no idea what their relationship should be called. Thus, Formo, who had been feeling confused knowingly or unknowingly, took the opportunity of the story Serdin had brought up playfully.
At Formo’s question, Serdin raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth.
“I’m hurt.”
“…What?”
“How can you not know what kind of relationship we have?”
“I-I…”
“Pipi, do you let just anyone hold you and kiss you like that?”
Serdin’s face as he asked in a low voice seemed a bit hardened. Formo’s fingers, which had been gripping the waist tie of his nightgown, flinched. Soon, Formo, who came to his senses, shook his head left and right.
“N-no?”
“Then why are you asking what kind of relationship we have?”
“…Because I don’t know.”
Formo, who had only been moving his lips silently, soon replied quietly.
“It’s all my first time so I don’t know. I don’t know anything. Even if I like you… I don’t know anything besides that. Why I came to like you, what I should do if I like someone, what kind of relationship we are… I don’t know anything.”
“Pipi.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
Moisture formed in Formo’s round eyes. Serdin moved his lips as he looked at Formo’s eyes rippling with a wet light.
“No, Pipi.”
“…”
“You did nothing wrong.”
Serdin, who soothed Formo with a gentle voice, reached out and softly held his cheek. The white, soft skin wrapped around his palm as if it had been waiting. Back when Formo wasn’t yet a beastman, he’d wanted to see tears come from those round eyes, so he’d deliberately acted mischievously.
At some point, he’d come to want to see him smiling brightly rather than crying. If Formo inevitably showed tears, he wished that place would definitely be in front of him. And now, he wished it would all be him who made Formo laugh and made him cry.
Serdin, hiding his dark inner thoughts, added with a smile on his lips.
“It’s my first time too, I’m just pretending to be skilled.”
“…Really?”
“Yeah.”
At Serdin’s words, Formo gulped. For some reason, he felt relieved by the story that Serdin wasn’t much different from him. He was glad that it wasn’t only him for the first time, that it wasn’t only him learning this emotion.
