From the very beginning, I had absolutely zero desire to take care of my needs here. I swear it. I’m not such a degenerate that I’d masturbate at work of all places — this isn’t my home, it’s my workplace. Me, who draws a razor-sharp line between public and private, doing something like that at the office? Ha, what an absurd thought.
But my body, conditioned by him over the span of years, refused to tolerate even a single day without being touched. The slightest brush of fabric against my skin made my nipples stand up sensitive and desperate to be pinched, and my hole kept twitching and clenching like it was dying to swallow something. Because the man had never left me alone for even a moment, I only realized belatedly that I was sexually frustrated.
Damn, so my first breakup is followed by my first sexual frustration. In dramas and movies, people are always busy crying their eyes out in grief — so why is my lower half pulling this crap?
I sang the national anthem in my head, watched nature documentaries, but the heat just wouldn’t go away, and I concluded it was better to take the edge off.
In the end, I awkwardly settled onto the sofa, brought both hands to my chest, and rubbed my nipples with the flat of my palms in a slow, kneading motion, just like he used to do. After a few passes of my palms over my clothes, my nipples went stiff. I pulled my t-shirt up and bit down on it, baring my chest. It looked completely different from when I’d first met the man. The color had deepened, and they’d gotten slightly larger.
Mmh—
On top of that, my chest, which I’d once felt nothing from, had become sensitive enough to get me hard after just a handful of touches. When I flicked one of the stiff peaks with my fingertips instead of my palm, a electric jolt of sensation swept through my entire body in an instant.
Huh!
I let out a moan like a sigh and sank deeper into the sofa. I slowly scratched at them with my fingertips, then quickly started rubbing, twisting my upper body. Every time my nipples were stimulated, blood rushed downward. Unlike my flustered, squirming body, the hand touching myself was persistent and relentless — just like Kang Jaeho’s hands.
Ha—
No longer satisfied with just rubbing and grinding, I pinched my nipples between my thumb and forefinger and pulled them forward.
Aah— hmmm—
A pleasure far greater than the faint sting came pouring through me. I tormented my nipples — pulling, pinching, twisting. The abused tips looked painful from the outside, but because my body had been trained to respond to every kind of contact this way, even that felt good. I ended up dropping the shirt I’d been holding in my mouth. But the hand that had slipped inside didn’t stop.
Hmm, it’s good…… huh, so good……
If I’m being honest, the more it hurt, the better it felt. Even rough, careless handling of my chest sent blood rushing to my cock. I’d never been taught what gentle, tender caresses felt like from the start — so I didn’t even know what that was.
At first, my intention had clearly been to just take the edge off quickly, but as the pleasure steadily climbed, my reason evaporated without a trace. It still wasn’t enough. No matter how much I tried to imitate him with these clumsy hands, a thirst that couldn’t be quenched made me lick my dry lips. I wanted Kang Jaeho to knead my chest mercilessly, to gather it up and bite at it. I wanted to be taken into his mouth — not by my own fingertips — and teased by his tongue.
I was irritated at the man who had swallowed me whole when I was young and shaped me like this, and then didn’t take responsibility to the end. I hated the man who had been secretly seeing a fiancée behind my back, and yet I couldn’t understand myself for wanting him to fuck me just as badly — but by then, my already-melted brain had stopped thinking.
Hmm— Kang Jaeho, ha— suck me……
I grabbed my entire chest and squeezed with all my strength until the flesh bulged out, shaking and releasing it over and over. There was no longer any trace of reason left in my head. All that filled it was the single desire to relieve the lust crashing through me.
I kneaded my own chest roughly like dough, then lowered one hand. I ground it over my crotch through my pants, getting more worked up, then drew my feet up onto the sofa and crouched. I spread my knees to either side for better access, unzipped my pants, and pulled out my stiff cock. Pre-cum was already leaking steadily from the tip of my fully hard length.
Ha— huh.
With one hand on my chest and the other on my cock, I lowered my gaze. And then I pictured him slowly licking up my cock from the base with his tongue. I tickled the shaft with my fingertips as if they were his tongue, letting out breathless moans. The transformation from faint tickling into maddening pleasure was instant. It was late at night and the office was empty, but for some reason it felt like I shouldn’t make noise, so I bit my lip and kept my sounds as suppressed as I could.
My spread legs kept closing on their own. It was a habit the man had pointed out countless times, but I still hadn’t managed to fix it. I used the pre-cum as lubricant and groaned as my cock slid slickly inside my palm, tilting my head back.
Hoo— mmh—
My honest body kept heating up and wanted to come, but something was missing. Even gripping and stroking my cock, the sensation wasn’t enough to fill the emptiness, and I finally pushed a finger into my mouth and sucked on it hard.
Slurp— chu, smack.
I thought of the man’s finger that had roamed freely through my mouth and then left — I traced the roof of my mouth, pressed and tormented my tongue with deliberate weight, then withdrew it.
I brought the saliva-slicked finger to my hole and circled it in slow strokes along the rim. My body twitched in anticipation of the coming intrusion. But I didn’t push the finger inside right away.
My hesitation was because of Kang Jaeho. The man had never permitted anything other than himself to enter me. Even my own fingers were no exception. This hole wasn’t one I could use without his permission. I’d thought that was strange, and yet the reason I never resisted was the reward that always followed. I’d learned that if I listened to the man and endured, I’d always be given pleasure great enough to make my whole body tremble. In that sense, I was a pretty well-behaved, obedient student.
Mmh— I can’t hold back anymore…… hic!
Of course, that no longer applied. The urge that kept thrusting my hips upward finally broke me, and I pushed my middle finger deep into the hole.
Ngh!
The finger slid inside almost too easily, parting the hot inner walls. There was no more hesitation. On instinct, I began working the finger in and out, spreading my legs wide to push deeper. It quickly became two fingers. I thrust them in and out, then scissored them apart to stretch myself inside.
Was it because there’d been so much saliva? Or had I been so aroused that I’d only imagined it? The man hadn’t gone down on me, and I hadn’t used gel — and yet the inside was so wet that it made slick sounds. The moans I’d been swallowing became meaningless as the wet, squelching noises echoed through the empty office. Every time I pulled my fingers out, liquid seeped out past the rim, and I trembled.
Hmm, mmh, ngh!
The hole, accustomed to the man’s thick and hard cock, was mouthing that two fingers weren’t enough — but this was my limit now. Eager to get it over with, I worked my hand faster. At the same time, I spread one hand wide and rubbed both nipples with my thumb and pinky — and in the end, unable to hold back against the mounting pleasure, I bucked my hips and came.
Ha— Kang Jaeho…… hic, Jaeho…… haa—!
Right in front of these cameras.
“Don’t try to stop me!”
I’m going to die — !
It took quite a while before the me who had been lunging to throw myself out of the office window — like a complete madman — finally calmed down.
The guys who had grabbed me by the waist and yanked at my clothes as I tried to climb onto the window ledge eventually managed to settle me down and sat me in the chair in front of the desk, crowding around me as if to cage me in. They were clearly on edge, tensed against the possibility that I might try to cause another scene.
“Hah……”
It seems like this year my fortune is absolutely packed to the brim with humiliation, doesn’t it? Because there’s no other explanation…… damn. The thing where I’d demanded to know what number I was while in the hospital ward, being called “baby” in the car and getting a look full of contempt in return, tripping and falling in an embarrassing heap in the dressing room. Is the world really allowed to do this to me? Huh?
“Hyung, please don’t be too upset. It’s not like those things get backed up in real time or have audio recorded, and the lenses aren’t some ultra high-end kind that can see your pores or any— ugh!”
Bulgom, who had elbowed Gamja in the solar plexus to cut off his rambling attempt at consolation — which Gamja had been trying to offer to me as I stood there with an expression that was not just despairing but on the verge of shattering into dust — opened his mouth.
“We’ve been cleaning and checking this office every day, and cameras like these weren’t here until recently. It seems like they were installed sometime in the last few days, so we’ll find out quickly who did something like this.”
“Yeah. Right. That’s the problem.”
“Sir?”
That few days is the problem! Damn it!
I slammed my fist hard onto the desk and, ignoring the stinging pain that shot up through it, scrubbed my face dry repeatedly.
“I’m being punished……”
For fuck’s sake. The crime of dropping my pants in a sacred workplace, and jerking off to my ex — who was the one who broke things off first — like he was material for that. I’m paying the price for that.
