Since they’d all ridden together in the filming car when coming to the airport, borrowing a car from Hajin was inevitable. That said, he didn’t want to commit the atrocity of using public transportation with Cha Seonwoo, who had to go to work tomorrow.
Even at the sudden proposal to go on a trip, Cha Seonwoo nodded without asking anything. But even if he’d told him where they were going, he would have naturally nodded. Though he hesitated for a moment seeing him sitting in the driver’s seat, he obediently got in the car.
The car that departed from the airport drove for quite a long time. Since they’d left before even eating lunch, they stopped at a rest stop on the way to roughly fill their stomachs. They ate in a decent atmosphere while exchanging jokes quite well, but he ended up with indigestion, so they had to stop at the next rest stop again.
“Haeyoung-ah, here.”
Seonwoo held out a small bottle to him as he came out of the bathroom. His other hand held the cap part of the bottle and lightly twisted it open.
Haeyoung hesitated looking at the brown glass bottle containing liquid digestive medicine. He’d never said anything like his stomach felt bad. He’d only said he’d go to the bathroom while entering the rest stop, unable to endure during driving, but how did he know…. Like a ghost.
Haeyoung, who erased his complicated gaze, received the medicine from him. Despite being dull about his own pain, he amazingly noticed when he was sick. Haeyoung, who threw the empty bottle in the trash, headed back to where the car was with Seonwoo.
It was when they’d almost arrived in front of the parked car. Seonwoo, who had caught Haeyoung as he was naturally about to go to the driver’s seat, spoke in a neat tone.
“I’ll drive.”
It was a voice that was soft but somewhere had a firm corner. Haeyoung opened his eyes slightly wide and looked up at him.
“Huh? No, I can do it. If you drive now too, hyung, you’ll be super tired tomorrow.”
“It’s okay, I’m not tired at all.”
“Still…….”
“Yes, Haeyoung-ah.”
At the voice gently calling him with a smiling face, Haeyoung closed his mouth. Receiving a gaze as if saying to speak if he had something to say, he had nothing to say. He obediently got into the passenger seat that Seonwoo opened the door for.
Seonwoo drove the car following the route already set on the navigation. What finally entered Haeyoung’s eyes as he glanced at him driving was the hand gripping the steering wheel. More precisely, the silver ring on the ring finger of the left hand gripping the steering wheel.
‘I’m going crazy….’
It was when he’d approached with a welcoming face as soon as he saw Hajin facing Seonwoo at the airport. His gaze naturally went to the item she handed to Seonwoo with a troubled face upon spotting him. And when he saw the item that landed on his palm…….
His fingertips momentarily turned cold and he almost dropped the bag he was holding. His heart sank because he knew too well what it was.
There was no way he wouldn’t recognize what he’d given. Haeyoung took his gaze off Seonwoo, whom he’d been glancing at, and watched straight ahead.
When he was just about to graduate, it was probably around autumn. Though Cha Seonwoo liked doing things together, he didn’t have much of a hobby for matching items, but the exception among them was rings. Around the time graduation approached, he particularly brought up talk about rings, and each time Haeyoung would change the subject with different words.
It wasn’t because he didn’t want to match. Since they weren’t attending school together anymore, there was nothing to worry about. But the problem was that he, as a college student back then, was much less financially comfortable than now.
In the midst of that, he wanted to personally gift at least the ring. The fact that he’d only been receiving all along had bothered him throughout, and the appropriate justification of graduation happened to arise.
‘Congratulations on graduating, hyung. This is a present.’
So Haeyoung added one more part-time job and with the money he saved, gifted him a ring on graduation day. He didn’t consider cheap models from the start. The place the ring would be worn was Cha Seonwoo’s finger—he couldn’t just put anything on those elegantly extended fingers.
In the end, he chose with difficulty while seeking help from Hajin. Though throughout helping him worry, she revealed her displeasure with words like ‘but why should you prepare that,’ ‘you don’t know but he’s actually fucking rich,’ ‘what are you spending money for, he’d grin happily even if you drew a ring picture on his finger with a pen,’ the result they chose looked quite good even to himself.
And on graduation day, wearing a graduation gown with black and blue, Cha Seonwoo was smiling more brilliantly than the bouquet he was holding. Until Haeyoung put the ring on his hand.
‘I’ll get you something better when I earn more money later. Wait for me, okay?’
Haeyoung, who deliberately raised the corners of his mouth more boldly due to awkwardness, let go of Seonwoo’s hand he’d been holding. Normally, he would have grabbed Haeyoung’s hand again and not let go. But Cha Seonwoo only stared down at the hand he’d let go.
Seonwoo, who had been silent for a long time, slowly opened his mouth. The voice that came from his quietly opened mouth was heavily dampened and sunken.
‘…I thought you disliked it.’
‘What, the ring?’
He looked up at Seonwoo and asked back. When Seonwoo slightly nodded, a sorry feeling briefly rose on Haeyoung’s smiling face. It seemed he remembered everything about subtly changing the subject each time he’d casually brought it up. Seeing him unable to take his eyes off the ring, his insides felt moved for no reason.
Haeyoung looked around. Confirming everyone was busy taking pictures, he raised his hand and held Seonwoo’s cheek.
‘Why would I dislike it? I’m dying to show off that Cha Seonwoo is mine.’
Though he said it playfully, it was sincere. In the end, Seonwoo’s red eyes immediately began to dampen. With his eyes lowered, moisture gathered entangled between his long extended eyelashes.
Haeyoung, who had been looking up at him, panicked and grabbed his sleeve with his fingertips.
‘Crying again? You’re crying again.’
The question mixed with panic was almost like a scolding. But contrary to his tone, Haeyoung gently pressed around Seonwoo’s eyes with his sleeve. The tears didn’t stop even as the white dress shirt quickly drew stains and got wet.
While Haeyoung diligently wiped to prevent his tears from flowing, Seonwoo silently kept his eyes lowered. What was captured in his deep gaze was only one person. His tightly closed lips moved low.
‘I want to hug you….’
‘Here? Hold it in a bit.’
‘Can’t, hold it…….’
‘Ah, please hyung…! Cha Seonwoo. Seonwoo-ya.’
Haeyoung struggled to support him as he leaned in as if collapsing toward him.
Only after returning to the parking lot and patting him for a long while could they salvage one photo that was a mess from crying. Ah, of course Cha Seonwoo was still showing off his pretty face alone even after crying, and it was his side that was a mess.
Was that photo still around? Haeyoung, who suddenly recalled it, bit his lips. If it was gone, somehow it felt like he couldn’t bear the sadness. Regardless of whatever gap existed between past and present, couldn’t he keep it? At least one photo.
“Haeyoung-ah, is your stomach still bad?”
Seonwoo, who had been glancing at him lost in thought, asked worriedly. Haeyoung opened his eyes wide and quickly shook his head.
“No, I’m totally fine. You know I’m originally sturdy.”
The answer came back late to what he said while smiling vigorously, pretending to be composed.
“……I know.”
There was also a faint smile in his reply. At the calm tone as if he couldn’t not know, Haeyoung flinched and raised his hand to grip his nape. His neck was stiffly frozen due to unconsciously tensing up.
Couldn’t he keep at least one photo? What remained from 5 years together wasn’t just about one photo. There was no way he could erase everything. Even though there was no way he could….
Haeyoung closed his mouth and swallowed a sigh. He would have to erase it. In order to be by his side nonchalantly like before.
Perhaps because, although he’d thrown it all up, he’d eaten an early lunch on the way, Haeyoung ended up dozing off in the quietly running warm car. He came to his senses when Seonwoo lightly held his shoulder.
Haeyoung startled and raised his head that had been dropped forward. Cha Seonwoo had a face that seemed surprised at the sudden movement.
“You looked uncomfortable so I was going to unfasten your belt. So you could sleep comfortably.”
Though he didn’t need to explain, Seonwoo spoke in a gentle tone. Haeyoung nodded while rubbing his eyes.
“I dozed off, sorry. I didn’t even know my eyes closed….”
“Recline the seat and sleep more, Haeyoung-ah.”
“No, I’m fully awake. Where is this?”
Haeyoung asked Seonwoo while looking around outside the window. Seeing the navigation guidance ended, it seemed they’d arrived at their destination. Since the car was parked far away, he couldn’t tell if the sea was spread out beyond the trees lined up in a row though.
“We’ve arrived.”
Looking at him peering out the window, Seonwoo readily opened his mouth. At the answer that came back, Haeyoung immediately turned his head.
“Then let’s go out. We should at least see the ocean, having come all the way here.”
It was exactly the answer he’d expected. The sleepy sign had already disappeared from his face. Seonwoo smiled as if there was no helping it and nodded.
“Okay.”
As soon as the answer fell, Haeyoung opened the door and went outside. He also took out the coat he’d thrown in the back seat and put it on. Seonwoo, who got out of the car following him, watched Haeyoung zip up to the end of his neck.
Perhaps because he was wearing a white padded jacket, his hair and eyebrows looked particularly dark. His refreshing features were embedded in his view even more clearly. Seonwoo, who had been blankly looking at him, belatedly closed the car door.
The winter wind, much fiercer than Jeju Island, thoroughly disheveled Haeyoung’s hair. But as if he didn’t care at all, he only roughly swept back his disheveled hair.
Now it was time to confess the choice he’d been putting off. Toward the man who had been the protagonist of every scene that could be called twenty years old, youth.
