# Chapter 91
“It seems suspicious.”
Luan, who had been observing the quiet castle for days, said. Since Ludin’s visit, Arzel’s castle had been giving off a slightly strange atmosphere. Those who were supposed to guard their posts had disappeared, and the rules that formed the castle flowed differently than before.
“The movements are unusual. And Ludin is nowhere to be seen.”
The man standing next to Luan agreed. He was one of the servants taken in by Zendal and had assisted Luan for his entire life. He never revealed his identity publicly, but later this became an advantageous shield. On the day Zendal was defeated, he was able to rescue Luan quietly without catching anyone’s eye. Even Ludin, who was his brother, couldn’t recognize the man’s face.
“We need to leave this place.”
“Is there a need to move immediately?”
“I can no longer trust Arzel. Staying in his castle is too dangerous.”
Luan said firmly. The man seemed to ponder for a while, then nodded. His slow nod was tinged with slight hesitation. They did have one safe residence left, but he was worried whether turning away from Arzel was truly the right decision.
“Give me three days. I’ll follow Arzel.”
“Can you find him?”
“I know the secret exits of the castle best.”
It was the result of his efforts thus far. There were several fixed routes that Arzel frequently used. By searching those paths, he might be able to accurately understand the situation they currently didn’t know. It wouldn’t be too late to move their residence after finding that out first. At the man’s confident answer, Luan mulled it over for a moment.
“Alright. There’s no harm in looking into it further.”
Once his permission was granted, the man hurriedly left the room. There was a space he wanted to check first. The man’s steps quickened as he headed toward a corner of the castle.
* * *
Kadilen, who had returned after finishing a meeting, was already out of his mind. For days, he had been feeling like he would explode if anyone so much as touched him. He couldn’t focus on anything. The time spent seeing, hearing, or reading anything other than Ludin felt entirely futile. The vanished Ludin pressed on Kadilen’s heart more distinctly than anything else, even without physical form. The weight was so overwhelming that he could barely breathe. The rising and setting of the sun no longer held meaning. Everything was nothing until Ludin appeared before him again. Just empty space. Without him, there was nothing he could do.
The chamberlain’s sad face greeted Kadilen in his tattered emotional state. The object in his hand made Kadilen’s heart sink.
“A soldier on guard duty found this.”
Kadilen tried to find a reasonable explanation. But any conclusion he reached only brought pain. His hand, reaching for the cloth, undeniably revealed his fear. Though it was soaked in bright red, he could recognize it immediately. It was what had covered Ludin’s arm. The sleeve that had fluttered this way and that in the wind while he struggled to swing his sword. But there was no Ludin here to smile brightly while sweating. Only the miserably stained fabric faced Kadilen, as if testifying to its owner’s suffering. He embraced the cloth and bent his waist. It felt like someone had stabbed a knife into his heart.
“My…”
The rest of the words wouldn’t come easily. No word seemed enough. He couldn’t explain Ludin. There didn’t seem to be a word that could contain all his feelings for him—desperate, tender, ecstatic, and regretful. Kadilen collapsed, not knowing what to do. The chamberlain with a worried expression silently supported him as he staggered.
In the icy silence, occasional painful groans continued. Despite trying to hold it in, the sentiments that forcibly burst out echoed through the room with terrible sounds. It took a very long time for Kadilen to gather his senses enough to read the writing on it. And when he confirmed the name of the five towers, his eyes lost their way like those of a madman.
“Your Majesty!”
Unspeakable anger arose. He threw everything around him carelessly. The desk, swept by boiling rage, instantly became a mess with scattered objects. Broken glass shards on the floor shattered the sunlight coming through the window.
And, through the gap in the commotion, someone had entered. A face that didn’t lose its kind gaze despite being in the same agony. The one who was quietly looking at the office that had become like a battlefield as if a storm had passed was Jiman. His slow gaze moved from the finely scattered pieces to Ludin’s blood-soaked sleeve. Jiman’s hand, which slowly picked it up, was trembling, but his pale complexion didn’t fully reveal his emotions. Looking at the terrible pattern made by the bloodstains, he quietly swallowed the flame burning only inside him.
Why had he been so greedy? Most of the time, he had endured well. He hadn’t tried to grasp the beautiful Ludin in his hands and had followed him without wavering. Even when, from some point, the unfamiliar aspects of him became more numerous than the familiar ones, and even after hearing the confession that he had become a new person, his heart had hardly settled. It was strange. It felt like it was burning even more intensely. Each time he received a merciful heart or touch, feelings that he could easily suppress before surged throughout his body.
Days of effort in the face of clear love. At some point, Jiman had gone to Kadilen.
‘Swear on your life. If you make him cry, you will have to shed more blood than that. Promise that you will kneel before him regardless of your position, past, and honor. As long as you don’t forget your promise to me, I will never touch the hearts of you two. However, if you cannot do so…
Even at the cost of my life, I will make you pay for the punishment of troubling him.’
In a way, it was a promise to suppress himself. It was a voluntary boundary drawn to look straight at where Ludin’s heart was headed. It was too rude for a vow thrown to a king of a country, but Kadilen sincerely responded to the promise. He promised to make Ludin happy with everything he could do.
However, the one who broke that promise first was himself. Although his heart ached at Ludin’s tears, was his heart merely aching? Didn’t he hold some hope during the quarrel between Kadilen and him? He had. He was truly happy that he could touch their hearts. Because it felt like a gap had formed where he could enter, he put his feelings ahead of Ludin’s will. He thought he could have him. But if this were truly the end, if that moment when he drove him away was the last moment with Ludin…
Jiman swallowed his pain as he watched the roaring Kadilen. And he added another pledge on top of the broken vow. Thinking he would never forget the result of a single moment of selfishness.
‘If only you come back alive… Then I will never be overly greedy again. Wherever you look, wherever you’re heading, I will never block your way. I will live solely for your happiness and focus only on keeping your tears away. I will love you forever and never let those feelings be discovered.’
Along with Kadilen’s low wails, Jiman’s quiet pledge flowed down with the heavy air.
* * *
In the forest densely filled with eerie fog, the man exhaled rough breaths. In the deep forest untouched by human footsteps, strong plants grown up to the waist persistently filled his sight. It had already been quite some time since he started walking aimlessly through a place where paths hadn’t formed, making everywhere look exactly the same. By now, the sun’s position had vaguely lowered. It had been three days since he began tracking Arzel with Luan’s permission, so now he had to return.
After circling the same spot a few more times, the man finally gave up and turned back the way he had come. This made it the tenth passage he had examined. The man didn’t lose hope as he checked the hidden paths located throughout the castle. Especially for this final passage, he had expected to find clues because it was a place where Arzel had behaved particularly suspiciously. Given that the person acting with Ludin was said to be a magician, using that small room made sense. However, since he couldn’t get any helpful information, he now had no choice but to move to a new residence with Luan.
While wandering through this vast forest, he occasionally felt signs of people from very distant places. But when he lowered his body and approached, there were only palace soldiers wandering with tired appearances. He couldn’t know how they knew about this place, but perhaps they were looking for the same thing as him. Because of this, he couldn’t let go of his desire to examine this place more. There was clearly something unknown to him in this forest.
But now that the promised three days with Luan had passed, he judged that it was better to leave Arzel’s castle as soon as possible rather than wasting futile time. If he happened to catch the eye of the palace soldiers, it would be quite an awkward situation. Not many, but a certain number of soldiers were continuously searching the forest.
The man turned his steps decisively. His face, mixed with resignation and determination, gazed in the opposite direction of the path he had been walking on. But as he trudged back, a suspiciously protruding tree caught his eye.
‘Wait, that’s strange.’
When all trees were stretching their heads in the same direction following the sunlight, this was a tree that pointed in an odd direction on its own. The shape of the leaves and the color of the bark were subtly different from the others. The man’s eyes sparkled.
He cautiously approached the tree. He knew something was strange, but he didn’t know how to make use of it. However, the tree pulled him in like a magnet, as if telling him not to worry. After briefly experiencing a peculiar feeling sweep over his body, the man was sucked into the soil that had been supporting the tree like a swamp, without even having time to scream. Where he had disappeared, there was only the scene of a quiet forest that had silently swallowed one person.
