“He just woke up?”
“That crazy bastard was sleeping until I cracked open the soju and called him.”
It’s a comment that brings to mind a certain someone who always shows up late to family events. Last time too, he woke up and bummed a ride from his dad. Park Hyeonho doesn’t have anyone to pick him up, so it’ll be at least an hour before he shows his face.
“How the hell does that bastard even go to work?”
“He says he’s never been late.”
“Does that make sense?”
“It means he thinks we’re dogshit.”
“Maybe if we pay him, he’ll come on time too?”
“Do we really need to pay Park Hyeonho just to meet him?”
“…True, right?”
The first appetizer was Park Hyeonho. This is why you can’t be absent from gatherings. While giggling, the second glass was quickly emptied and three more bottles of soju were added to the table. The meat grilling in the center was seasoned ribs. Good thing it’s not pork belly. I didn’t want to eat it two days in a row.
Nam Seongwoo grilled the meat. Maybe it’s because he’s a salesman, but he grills meat incredibly well.
Won Dogyeong was good at cooking in general, so he was pretty good at grilling meat too, and both Park Hyeonho and I were average. But we could never hand the tongs to Kim Sekyung. This bastard had the ability to only make meat either tataki or charcoal, with no middle ground. If you let him handle a steak, he’d bring it back blue rare.
I don’t know if he wanted to hone his skills or what, but he kept wanting to grill himself, and every time everyone would silently snatch the tongs away. Just now he’d sneakily put his hand on the tongs and Won Dogyeong took them from him.
He cut the meat into bite-sized pieces, lifted them up to check from various angles, then placed the fully cooked pieces on my plate.
“Fuck, I have a mouth too, Dogyeong.”
Won Dogyeong looked at the whining Kim Sekyung and tossed meat onto his plate as if annoyed. Kim Sekyung shoved the well-cooked meat into his mouth while grumbling.
“Rude bastard. I’m writing about you online soon.”
“Hey, make sure to verify with the graduation album. Then we’ll believe you.”
Nam Seongwoo added with a giggle.
“I came out like shit in that.”
“Not your face, dumbass. Upload a picture of Won Dogyeong’s graduation photo.”
“First time I’ve seen a bastard who’d expose someone while showing his own face.”
Won Dogyeong spoke as if pathetic and clicked his tongue. Watching him busily flip the meat, I took the tongs from him since he seemed unable to eat properly while grilling.
While we concentrated on eating with only silly jokes being exchanged for a while, a ringtone sounded from somewhere. Kim Sekyung’s eyes widened as he growled.
“Which bastard is it.”
“It’s your phone.”
“Oh.”
Kim Sekyung downed the drink he was holding and fumbled to take out his phone. On the glittering screen was a photo of a young girl with her hair in pigtails.
[Jung Minji/My Daughter♡]
The dissonance between his ex-wife’s name honestly written in three characters and the ticklish title after the slash was tremendous.
“Hello? Daughter~.”
He answered the phone in a stiff voice, but after confirming the voice on the other end, his tone changed to a sweet one. The person who’d been spewing curses nonstop had disappeared somewhere, instantly transformed into a daughter-fool dad.
“What’s up with my puppy~?”
Nam Seongwoo turned away with an “uek” face like he was going to throw up. I unconsciously looked at Won Dogyeong. Our eyes met right over the grill, perhaps feeling similarly.
Will we become like that too?
Won Dogyeong tilted his head. He doesn’t seem to imagine it well. I was the same. It would be hard to adjust if Won Dogyeong acted like that.
Or not? It might surprisingly suit him.
Just watching him talk to my belly saying “Yongyong, today this happened and that happened” showed he had doting parent tendencies.
“Dad? Dad’s with friends right now, right~.”
If you had to pick the person least suited to being a parent among us, it would undoubtedly be Kim Sekyung, but ironically he became a dad the fastest.
He got into trouble with a girlfriend he’d dated for six months at twenty-five and got married. And though they split up quickly after just two years, they seemed to have agreed to raise the child together as much as possible and met often.
Every time we meet he demands we cough up congratulatory money, but we don’t even pretend to listen.
“Who? Asking if Uncle Dogyeong is here? He is. …Want me to switch?”
Kim Sekyung’s daughter Jia, now four years old, always asks if Uncle Dogyeong is there whenever he says he’s with friends, ever since she learned that her dad’s friend Uncle Dogyeong appears on TV. When he’s there, she’s a cute terrible four-year-old who only deals with her dad after greeting Won Dogyeong first.
Won Dogyeong, receiving the phone from Kim Sekyung who had a shit-eating expression, smiled triumphantly and acted affectionately toward Jia.
“Hey~ Jia. It’s Uncle Dogyeong. Yeah, yeah. Really? Uncle misses Jia too~.”
Only after talking for a while did she ask to be switched back to dad, and the phone crossed the table again.
“Jia, dad’s sad… You’re hanging up? Wait, ah.”
Looking at the frozen, flustered Kim Sekyung, the three of us laughed holding our stomachs. It’s not a sight you can easily see anywhere—that hot-tempered bastard being treated like that.
“Shut up.”
Kim Sekyung filled everyone’s soju glasses to the brim with an indignant face. This toast was for Jia who’d pulled one over on him.
While chewing the meat, I suddenly became curious and spoke up. If not this guy, there was no one around me I could ask something like this.
“Was it really hard when Jia was a baby?”
“I thought I was going to die.”
Kim Sekyung answered firmly without a moment’s hesitation.
My eyes met Won Dogyeong’s again. What are we going to do?
“Why?”
Won Dogyeong hurriedly joined the conversation. At the beginning of the childcare talk, Nam Seongwoo took out his phone with a completely uninterested expression and scrolled through social media.
“The kid wakes up every two or three hours. Doesn’t matter if it’s day or night, cries like hell. But sometimes you don’t know what the problem is. You try feeding, try putting them to sleep, check their temperature…. Try not sleeping for months like that listening to a baby cry, you’ll go crazy.”
He spat out rapid-fire while shuddering. Hearing that story, Won Dogyeong seemed to be seriously contemplating something with a grave expression. He was probably thinking about that movie he’d already said he’d do after my encouragement.
Just from his face, he looked ready to contact them right now saying he can’t do it, so I stretched out my leg under the table and tapped him. When I mouthed “it’s okay,” Won Dogyeong wrinkled his nose with an unconvinced expression.
“But why? …Did you get into trouble too?”
“What are you talking about. Just curious. We’re almost thirty too.”
I denied it while trying not to flounder from being caught completely off guard. I’d have to come clean to these guys eventually, but not now. In the midst of that, I couldn’t bring myself to say “no.”
Kim Sekyung chewed on his seasoned vegetables while muttering with a fed-up look as if recalling something.
“Don’t get into trouble. Kids are fucking cute but life becomes fucking tiring….”
Already did. With the guy right in front of you.
“Yeah yeah. You’re drinking more right? Ordering rice too?”
To change the subject, I pointed to the green bottles that were already down to half a bottle out of three and asked. Perhaps I hadn’t asked too seriously, as Kim Sekyung pressed the bell casually saying whatever.
“One rice each and two stews. Jeongwon and I will share one mul naengmyeon, what about you guys?”
Won Dogyeong jumped in to organize the order. He seems to remember that I said I wanted to eat naengmyeon before coming in.
“Give us one bite of yours.”
“No. If you want to eat it, order it.”
When the topic changed, Nam Seongwoo, who’d put down his phone and lifted his head, was firmly refused by Won Dogyeong who shook his head.
“Stingy bastard. Then let’s get bi naengmyeon.”
“Don’t give those bastards even one bite.”
Nam Seongwoo and Kim Sekyung bumped fists forming a mysterious alliance. It was a pitiful alliance that no one but themselves cared about.
The food all came out and Won Dogyeong pushed the entire naengmyeon in front of me telling me to eat first. It contrasted with the two bastards next to us fighting over dividing the bi naengmyeon in half about whose portion was bigger.
After finishing the remaining half bottle of the three, when everyone seemed to be getting a bit tipsy, the door slid open.
“You came?”
“Look who’s here early.”
“Look at that state, did you come in your pajamas?”
“Stop fucking with me.”
Park Hyeonho stood there with a shameless face, his bird’s nest hair clearly showing he’d just woken up, wearing a T-shirt roughly thrown over sweatpants. He slowly took off his shoes and came in yawning, plopping down in the seat next to me.
“Don’t talk to me until I catch up.”
Kim Sekyung placed a new bottle of soju in front of Park Hyeonho like throwing it and threatened him.
“You’re eating meat right?”
When I asked while pressing the bell, he nodded and opened the soju. Then noticing there was no glass only in front of me, he asked curiously.
“Not drinking?”
“I have to drive.”
“What, then I won’t drink either.”
“Ah, stop talking nonsense and drink quickly.”
Won Dogyeong, whose face had turned slightly flushed, snatched the bottle he’d been opening, removed the cap, and poured it glug-glug into a beer glass—not even a soju glass—and handed it to Park Hyeonho. Perhaps rebelling just for the sake of it, he downed the full beer glass without complaint in one shot.
There was no need to worry though—this bastard could hold his liquor the best among us. Of course, being able to hold your liquor and drinking within your limits were separate things, so he’d never once gone home sober.
