“Me?”
He tried to recall, but nothing specific came to mind. Saehyeon began to ponder deeply. Before long, something did come to mind.
‘Ah, right. My memory was in idiot-moron state.’
It was either included in the lost memories, or simply forgotten. The possibility was one of the two. Just as he was about to accept that, he suddenly came to his senses. This wasn’t the issue right now.
If it was the former, he absolutely had to watch what he said to avoid revealing the gaps in his memory.
“No. But still… this suddenly?”
And wasn’t the essence of the question something else entirely? Even if he really had said that, so what?
“Why would you?”
That wasn’t a reason for a person like Gil Taeseo to drag him all the way out here at this very moment.
Saehyeon turned his head to the side. He’d turned courageously, thinking he wouldn’t be able to see well like before. But the man’s face was unexpectedly clearly visible. The light pouring from behind flowed down along the man’s body lines, acting like a band of light.
Startled, he looked around to find the surroundings equally bright. Despite it being night, lights were being directed toward the open beach side.
That light had apparently passed the secluded back area where they’d parked the car and now moved to the front. Sparsely scattered people could be seen around them. When he glanced at the beach, a deep teal water color was now reflected there as well.
‘The beach is bright even at night.’
To think he hadn’t noticed until the surroundings had changed this much. It really felt like he’d been enchanted by something from the night view earlier until now.
Light shimmered in Saehyeon’s eyes as he gaped blankly. Gil Taeseo, who had been quietly watching that, suddenly opened his mouth.
“When a person gets fucked over and rolls around like shit, there are times like that.”
The thought that came to mind as soon as he heard that was this:
‘So you’re saying your head suddenly spun and you wanted to do something crazy? Is that it?’
But it seemed like he was already doing that often anyway. If he were to list all the crazy things Gil Taeseo had shown until now, his mouth would hurt. Just as Saehyeon’s eyes were about to narrow.
As if that had been a preamble, the rest of the words followed in a chain.
“There are times when you get this gut feeling that if you don’t do it now, you’ll keep thinking about it until you die and lie in a coffin later.”
He felt like he somehow understood. That feeling that you’d regret it if you didn’t do something right now. Saehyeon had always lived chased by that feeling.
The mood that if he didn’t live today, right now, this moment to death, he’d become an eternal loser, pushed at his back.
It was a driving force, but sometimes it acted like an aphid sucking out vital fluids. The more he moved forward with them hanging all over his limbs, the more sluggish his body became and the more a corner of his heart creaked.
“In the old days, whenever this happened, I’d desperately do the exact opposite.”
But then this question arose. That the thing that gave him such a gut feeling was just this? Suddenly bringing him to the sea in the middle of the night?
“But now I’ve given up on that bullshit.”
Swoooosh, the wind rushed in along with the sound of crashing waves. The fierce wind violently shook the clothes and hair of both men. His vision was obscured, but he couldn’t not know. That Gil Taeseo’s eyes, which had been looking straight ahead, slowly turned toward him as he said those words. This time it was Saehyeon’s turn to turn his head away.
“…What is it, since earlier. Why do you keep saying weird things?”
When incomprehensible words were added to the absurd behavior, even the atmosphere became strange. It was enough to make him avert his gaze slightly in embarrassment.
“Mommy!”
It was by chance that a child running while giggling caught his eye as he avoided it. The child dashed past swiftly right beside the two of them. Saehyeon’s head automatically moved slowly along that trajectory.
‘They’re going to fall doing that.’
Whether it was because the particles were fine and thoroughly saturated with moisture, or just because that was its nature. The sandy beach yielded deeply without resistance with every step.
It was partly because he was wearing absurdly large shoes, but it was enough to make even himself, an adult male, careful with his steps.
But the child didn’t seem scared of such unstable footing. They didn’t care that their neatly arranged bangs were splitting in half. The child who ran like that threw themselves into the embrace of their crouching parents.
Giggling laughter, a voice calling for daddy after mommy. Watching that picture made his chest swell. The words tumbled out of his mouth unconsciously.
“…Should’ve brought the kid too.”
Saehyeon immediately closed his mouth. The meaning of what he’d just blurted out hit him belatedly. It was an awareness like waking from a dream.
It was well past the time when the child would be asleep, and he’d been dragged here without any plan either. The alpha beside him in the bizarre outfit of dress pants and bare feet probably had quite a lot to do too, so they’d probably have to rush back soon.
Saehyeon looked back and forth between the sea and his feet with eyes containing a bit of regret. Thinking that they’d have to go back soon, an impulse to do something more suddenly surged up from within. But considering the aftermath or the way back, not doing anything was probably the right choice.
“What are you doing? Not coming in?”
Gil Taeseo, who had already stepped boldly into the sea, was staring blankly at him. The bottom hem of his pants got helplessly soaked by the incoming waves.
“…When did you even go in that far?”
“Whatever. If you don’t come, I’ll handle it myself.”
The man wasn’t satisfied with just ruining his own clothes. He grabbed the hand that was waving to tell him to hurry out and pulled it sharply with force. In an instant, Saehyeon, whose feet were plunged into the cold seawater, shuddered. Water quickly poured gushing inside his shoes.
“Crazy, what are we going to do about the aftermath of this!”
Saehyeon was aghast and lifting at least the hem of his jacket when it happened. Salty seawater instantly struck Saehyeon’s upper body in a chunk. The splashed water reached even his lips. When he looked up, Gil Taeseo standing in the water had a crooked expression.
“It’s not like you’re going to deal with it anyway, so why make such a fuss.”
That bastard, did he just splash water at me? Saehyeon’s eyes immediately sharpened.
“…Alright. You want to do this, is that it?”
Everything he wore and had on was expensive, so it was something he’d been somewhat careful about. But if the person in question was like that, there was no need to go easy on this side either. Saehyeon rolled up his sleeves to his forearms, jacket and all.
With the resolve to make him into a salted mackerel, even if he couldn’t make him float up as a drowned corpse the next day.
***
“Do you have any luggage to bring up?”
That was the full story of how Saehyeon came to sneak into the hotel pressed flat against Gil Taeseo’s back.
By the time they got out of the seawater, both were completely drenched. It would have been stranger if they weren’t, given that they’d splashed water on each other, fallen over, pushed each other down, and caused such chaos. Not just their shoes and jackets but even their underwear ended up thoroughly salt-pickled in seawater. Saehyeon was twisting his jacket sleeve to wring out water when his nose twitched.
“A-, achoo!”
The sea breeze, which had already been cool, now felt almost like a blade. Seeing chills creeping up his body, it felt like it might develop into a cold if he wasn’t careful. Gil Taeseo, who had been watching such Saehyeon intently, suggested they go to the hotel.
At the word “hotel,” he tried to refuse at first.
“Then you want to go back looking like this? Sounds like you’re saying you want to be bedridden with a cold for about a week.”
Looking at Gil Taeseo’s eyes, which clearly read “don’t fuck around,” Saehyeon eventually had no choice but to nod.
But the real obstacle was in a place he hadn’t thought of at all. The hotel that Gil Taeseo, who probably had money rotting away, had reserved… had a lobby that looked glittering and flashy at first glance.
Walking through that lobby… Gil Taeseo in a thoroughly soaked shirt and bare feet?
It wouldn’t be strange to be assassinated by the gangster underlings he’d been seeing more and more often lately, while hearing “How dare you, to our hyungnim!” Saehyeon eventually grabbed Gil Taeseo’s forearm with the feeling of drinking poison.
“You… don’t take off your shoes. Hey, hey, just try taking them off!”
“What nonsense are you spouting now?”
“You wear them and carry me. I’ve passed out. Got it? You got it?”
Saehyeon curled up between Gil Taeseo’s damp back and jacket. It was the concept of a drunken beachgoer who had to be moved because they’d fainted. Though his body flinched every time he heard conversation sounds, they were ultimately able to make it up to the room safely.
As soon as the employee who had escorted them to the room left and the door closed, Saehyeon flung off the jacket he’d been wearing draped over him like a skirt.
“I thought I was going to suffocate to death. Put me down now while I’m asking nicely.”
This was a lie. Honestly, breathing hadn’t been difficult. It was just that he’d become disgusted by the hot warmth and body scent that reached him more vividly, perhaps because of the wet fabric.
But far from obediently putting him down, Gil Taeseo strode toward the bed.
