“Hup…!”
His genitals were grabbed in one swift motion. Saehyeon simultaneously covered his own mouth with both hands. Otherwise, he had no confidence he could avoid making sounds.
Whether Saehyeon made strenuous efforts or not, the man’s hand kneaded what was in his grasp without hesitation. It was still through underwear, but he could tell immediately upon grabbing.
This smooth, bare penis was already slightly erect with a firm core. Like it held a bit of moisture, the thin underwear fabric clung along the outline of the shaft and wrapped snugly around the rubbing hand.
“Ha.”
It was the same before, but compared to how much he detested it, his body felt things easily. With just a little touch, rubbing his weak spots, he’d quickly fall apart.
It was Gil Taeseo himself who had awakened sexual sensation in that body that had been like a blank sheet. The man who perhaps knew that body in more detail than its owner quickly skillfully tore through and disheveled Saehyeon.
The alpha’s gaze stuck heavily to the body squirming trapped under his arm. Though it was a frail and pitiful appearance, gaunt and only pale, it was more than enough—it overflowed—to excite Gil Taeseo. It had been the same even when Lee Saehyeon clearly had a beta-like body.
‘Getting aroused by a sick-looking body, I’m really no different from a beast.’
Even for Gil Taeseo, who had sold off his conscience and morality at dirt-cheap prices, he couldn’t help but think that.
‘I wonder if there’s anyone else who’s seen and touched this.’
His mood twisted once again at the thought that naturally arose. That made Gil Taeseo deliberately say something mean.
“Did you get hard from having your nipples sucked?”
“Mmph! Mmm!”
Saehyeon protested while covering his own mouth, but it was useless.
‘Damn it…!’
Covering his mouth sealed not only resistance but also denial and curses. He tried to put all sorts of resentment into his mumbling sounds, but even that only amounted to keeping it down and making it quiet.
“Come to think of it, you always pretended to hate it but secretly liked it, didn’t you? Handjobs.”
And for some reason he didn’t know, the more he struggled, the more excited the man seemed to become.
The large hand pulled down his pants and underwear. Naturally, the hand that had been kneading his genitals remained fixed in its original position. The naked penis without underwear was, as expected, dampened with pre-cum. After rubbing it up and down a few times, the moisture thoroughly seeped between flesh and flesh.
The man didn’t let his mouth idle either. After spouting useless words, he also clung to his body. Sucking on his chest, then biting and gnawing at his nape. Like some teething beast.
If it had been a real animal, it would have just ended with drawing blood. The fact that Gil Taeseo was human acted as an unexpected obstacle for Saehyeon instead.
Unsatisfied with small mischief, Gil Taeseo finally slid his hand backward. Abandoning the penis he’d been obsessively stroking until just now.
“When I dig into your ass… you end up loving it and going crazy in the end, don’t you?”
The hand that had smoothly moved to the back roughly grasped the soft buttocks. When he gripped tightly enough to leave handprints, flesh bulged out plumply between the gaps in his fingers. The hand that had been kneading and teasing the buttocks a few times soon burrowed between those gaps.
“Ugh…!”
What the fingertip touched was the entrance puckered small. Despite having arduously swallowed something huge just a few days ago, it was primly keeping its mouth shut as if being coy. The only trace of sex that could be found was that the surrounding area was swollen plump. Just about that much.
The touching finger gently rubbed the swollen entrance. Because the owner was obsessively fastidious about grooming, there was no scratching with nails. But the sensation of rubbing purely with flesh beneath the nails came across even more vividly, which was troubling.
Really, truly troubling.
‘No way… is he really doing it? Here, like this?’
For Saehyeon, it was a flow he absolutely couldn’t believe.
‘No, wasn’t this clearly a fighting atmosphere to anyone watching…!’
If it were the original relationship, that is, precisely the relationship that the current Saehyeon remembered. This situation would have already escalated into a dogfight and then some.
Not being pinned down like this and groped, kneaded, and drooled on. Not having that embarrassing place, that place he’d never dreamed would be used with such intention again, rubbed.
It should have been grabbing each other by the collar and hurling thick curses, then exchanging punches and ending it.
Only at this very moment could Saehyeon truly feel it. That his relationship with Gil Taeseo had clearly been reversed. It seemed he could never again feel that sense of being equals while barking at each other like before.
‘It’s not like I didn’t know.’
Right. It wasn’t something he didn’t know. But there’s clearly a difference between knowing with your head and recognizing with your heart.
From the time they reunited, Gil Taeseo had been holding everything that Lee Saehyeon had so desperately desired. He’d become the kind of person who wouldn’t be looked down on by anyone, who wouldn’t disappoint anyone.
Such a Gil Taeseo stands loftily while looking down at him. At himself who had been ruined even more miserably than his original form.
‘It’s true I was thinking of using both of them, but still, is this right?’
And then he was trying to arbitrarily pin down and suppress Saehyeon to ‘use’ him. The impatient touch groping hastily, the blazing gaze, the limbs pressing down. They were interpreted and heard by Saehyeon in a different language.
That your worth is about this much.
“Here, it’s still swollen. Can you feel it?”
The finger that had been teasing the swollen entrance tantalizingly probed the entrance as if it would or wouldn’t penetrate. Each time it moved as if it could thrust in at any moment, his tense body trembled with a shudder.
Gil Taeseo’s other hand was just as busy. It roamed over the entire body trembling with what might be sexual sensation, occasionally sweeping down. They lingered persistently on particularly shabby parts. Parts that Saehyeon particularly didn’t like when changing clothes or washing. For example, joints where bones could be felt bumpy.
“Despite being swollen taut like this, what’s with moving like it’s pulling every time I touch it?”
Saehyeon panted. Part of it was difficulty breathing because he’d covered his mouth so hard with his hand, but it was also considerably due to mental overload.
Each time a hand grazed, the veneer of bravado he’d desperately put on was peeled away. Wherever the gaze touched, bright red tender flesh was exposed.
He’d thought he could just use him. Whether it was himself or Gil Taeseo. Because he had to survive first, regardless of what happened to his situation.
It was natural for humans to use each other, for the person who gained the upper hand to arbitrarily define the relationship.
But why he felt so miserable like this, even Saehyeon himself couldn’t explain his own emotions.
‘Even you, me…’
Unidentifiable words of the heart stabbed at his solar plexus. As if responding, the things that had been bubbling inside also surged forth riding the momentum. Anxiety, misery, fear. Disappointment in himself and the other person. And uncontrollable resentment.
Lee Saehyeon finally removed the hand that had been covering his mouth. The hand that gained freedom like that climbed upward in one breath and roughly grabbed the hair of the beast clinging to his chest.
Between his coldly cooled fingers, soft hair filled in warmly. Saehyeon, who had clenched his teeth, pulled hard backward on the hand he gripped like a handle. How tightly he’d grabbed it,
“Ugh.”
The man slightly frowned at the unrestrained hand. Having his hair grabbed was an unfamiliar experience for him.
When he was young, he’d grown up under his mother’s devoted protection with a considerable personality befitting a promising sprout, and after growing to a certain extent, he’d been in a position too high for others to grab. Both physically and metaphorically.
“What the hell is this now…”
On top of that, there was no way an alpha would pleasantly accept having an act that had been building up for a while cut off. Gil Taeseo, who spat out the nipple that had been sucked and licked until it swelled red, raised his head with a fierce momentum.
But when Lee Saehyeon entered his raised field of vision, the man stopped stock-still just like that. The mouth that was about to spit out harsh words shut tight, and focus returned to the eyes that had been dimly glistening.
A powerless voice dug like a blade into the ear of the man who had frozen like a statue. It was a voice that was quiet in itself and had a lingering tremor at the end, so it absolutely couldn’t be threatening.
Nevertheless, it caused a pain as if sharply gouging inside the ear.
“Are you… crying?”
Gil Taeseo helplessly received the sensation of his hotly heated body cooling down icily in an instant.
Saehyeon was just as flustered. He’d clearly opened his mouth in boiling rage. But for his voice to tremble like some baby goat.
“Fuck, who’s crying?”
Saehyeon raised one arm and covered his face. It was a reflexive action. They say a man only cries three times in his life. He’d already been a crybaby when young, so he’d long since graduated after using up his valid count. If he had to pinpoint the timing, it was probably around early teens.
No matter how he only had memories up to age 20, for an adult with pubic hair sprouting… No. He was now in the hairless period. Anyway, for such an adult to cry unsightly while angry was truly an unsightly thing.
But it seemed Gil Taeseo wouldn’t leave even this alone. The hand that had escaped from the waistband grabbed his forearm.
