Primordial Evil—an existence that seduces summoners with overpowered rewards promising to grant any wish, but simultaneously destroys them. The only way to summon this Primordial Evil was to gather the six seals held by the Guardians of the Primordial Evil. As soon as my eyes met Kiss’s, I asked in a serious voice:
“Primordial Evil… that’s the legendary existence that grants wishes, right? Does this mean one of the Guardians of the Primordial Evil exists here?”
“Well, the Void is an unstable space in many ways. So it’s not entirely impossible.”
I organized my thoughts carefully. If we eliminated a Guardian, we could obtain a seal to summon the Primordial Evil, so perhaps this wasn’t entirely bad luck.
‘The problem is how to eliminate that Guardian.’
I looked back and forth between the two, whose relationship still seemed poor. Kiss, who had been pondering something like me, spoke in a calm voice:
“Right, one of the Guardians could be here.”
“…”
“But we also can’t rule out the possibility that Deus lied to hide his heart.”
At Kiss’s oddly sharp tone, Deus raised one eyebrow.
“Why are you being like this? I don’t lie.”
“Well, they say black tigers have been cowardly and selfish since ancient times.”
“Ah, I get it. I have good instincts when it comes to romance.”
Deus, who had roughly wiped his hands on his pants, rose from his seat. Then with a slouching posture, he approached Kiss and tapped his knee with his foot.
“You’re angry because I kneaded Ash’s butt, aren’t you?”
Kiss, who had paused for a moment, tilted his head slightly to the side.
“Not really. I’m not angry about you kneading such a tasteless butt.”
“Really? Then let me knead it some more, so step outside for a bit. You’re in the way.”
Irritation flashed momentarily across Kiss’s face, which had been peaceful all along. Seeing that he’d evoked the emotion of ‘irritation’ in Kiss, who usually maintained a poker face, Deus really did have talent.
The talent for pissing people off, that is.
Kiss, who had risen from his seat following Deus, met my gaze. As I stared blankly at the two tall figures, I was reminded of when I once visited a cat cafe where a friend worked part-time.
‘The white Persian cat and the black Norwegian Forest cat especially didn’t get along.’
Right, the real problem was how to subjugate the Guardian with these two who didn’t mesh. I stared blankly at the two who were too busy hissing at each other to pay attention, then picked up the blanket that had been placed on the sofa. And covered each of their heads with the blanket in turn.
It was an action I took remembering how, before going to the vet, when I covered the carrier with a blanket to calm an excited cat, it became quiet.
‘I-I didn’t think it would actually work…’
I coughed awkwardly while looking with wonder at the two who had become truly silent the moment their vision was blocked.
“Let’s check first.”
The two, now docile, turned their heads while covered by the blanket. I added in a calm voice:
“Whether a Guardian of the Primordial Evil is really here or not.”
* * *
Having just amicably shared Scorpion together, I left the inn with the two whose relationship had already crumbled. I’d roughly anticipated that their compatibility wasn’t good, but I didn’t expect it to be this bad. I broke out in a cold sweat at their relationship, so broken that they didn’t exchange a single word until we arrived at the beach.
‘Awkward… Since things turned out this way, wouldn’t it be nice if you got along?’
Anyway, the three of us currently had a common goal of eliminating the Guardian. I looked back and forth between the two who were treating each other like they didn’t exist with a troubled expression, then spoke in a deliberately bright voice:
“I-If we safely escape from here, shall the three of us go eat something delicious? I heard there’s a famous dessert shop in the shopping district.”
Since Kiss’s only interest was food, it was a question I threw out thinking I’d somehow find common ground between the two. Deus, who had been pondering something, said indifferently:
“Isn’t food just for filling your stomach? I don’t understand guys who go around looking for delicious things to eat. Such picky guys must have small dicks too.”
“…”
Kiss, who had been walking silently, chuckled and muttered:
“Well, Ash seemed to find it quite overwhelming though.”
Deus stopped dead in his tracks. I deliberately pretended not to notice Deus silently exuding murderous intent. I walked silently along the beach in an atmosphere that had become even more disastrous. How far had we walked? My steps stopped at Kiss’s action of suddenly blocking the way with his arm. Kiss, who had been intently watching something, said in a calm voice:
“There’s something in the fog.”
Following Kiss’s gaze and turning my head, a large ship that appeared to be stranded on the sandy beach came into view. Kiss, who had stepped a few paces forward and made a motion as if grabbing the air, clicked his tongue.
“The flow of magical power changes beyond this boundary. It’s definitely not an ordinary monster.”
I unconsciously swallowed dryly at the eerie sight reminiscent of a ghost ship.
‘If my memory isn’t wrong, this is definitely…’
The Primordial Evil, said to have existed since before the world was born, had six Guardians. They used powerful Dark Magic to eliminate beings with life force and dried up lands and rivers. They were called Guardians, but they were essentially nothing less than calamities. I clenched my fists and broke out in a cold sweat.
‘Damn, this is Lucky.’
Creak, bang.
The tightly closed hatch of the ghost ship opened, and a mysterious existence slowly revealed itself from within the fog. Almost simultaneously, Kiss and Death, standing with their backs to me, re-gripped their respective weapons. Just as I was thinking how reassuring that was, I checked Deus’s weapon and asked in a dismayed voice:
“Why is it a saw instead of a sword?”
“Swords cut too easily, so they’re no fun.”
Unlike Kiss who was holding a normal-looking sword, for some reason Death’s weapon was a single-edged saw with unidentifiable chunks of flesh stuck all over it. Just as I was about to tackle him asking where there’s a crazy bastard who pursues fun in a life-or-death situation, a resounding voice rang out.
“What, Lucky♥ Today there are two handsome men!”
What fully revealed itself as the fog completely lifted was a mimic octopus beastman wearing a white tailcoat covered in blood. Dozens of glass bottles hanging from his waist made jingling sounds with each movement.
The sixth Guardian of the Primordial Evil, Lucky—whose face was that of an octopus despite his muscular body.
The character design was so familiar that even during serialization there were comments saying ‘FluffyChron author, you bastard, aren’t you afraid of copyright!’
‘But seeing him in person, the sense of intimidation is incredible—it’s on a different level from reading it in text.’
Not only his physique, but the several tentacles attached under his chin moved like playing a piano, giving off a grotesque feeling. Deus, who had been listening silently, frowned and said:
“Two handsome men? Don’t exclude Ash.”
“…You didn’t say who the two handsome men were, so why are you reacting like you naturally excluded me?”
Toward me quietly protesting, Lucky lifted his chin and snapped:
“No? I did exclude you. I’m not into brats who probably don’t even have hair down there yet.”
“I do have hair!”
He’s just thin, but Ash isn’t particularly small either. Being sandwiched between Kiss and Death who have exceptionally good physiques must make him look smaller. When Lucky’s gaze, which had been looking at me huffing with disinterest, reached Death, his face flushed as if wondering when he’d become like a dead fish.
“Oh my, one of you is the man whose heart I took last time. Wasn’t that deal finished?”
“Yeah, but I found someone new I want to give my heart to. I’d like it back.”
“That’s troublesome. Handsome men like you are rare. You’re treated as quite rare even among my collection. Or…”
Before Lucky could finish speaking, Death burst forward. Death, who had severed one of the legs attached under Lucky’s chin with his saw, shoved the flailing tentacle into his mouth and smiled.
“Isn’t your dialogue too long?”
