He didn’t have the confidence to do it. Yuhan had been more than good to him, and he was slowly melting into him. He was used to love he didn’t have to return — but an affection he wanted to return was unfamiliar. The line he had drawn was beginning to lose its meaning.
“Then are you hungry? Did you eat anything yesterday?”
“Yesterday…. I just ate something quick.”
If he had confronted the person who managed the household, he would have immediately understood that Jinwoo’s “something quick” was exactly that — but unfortunately, today was the weekend, and she hadn’t come in.
Yuhan seemed dissatisfied with that answer, clicking his tongue softly before shifting closer to Jinwoo and pulling him into his arms. It happened so fast that Jinwoo had no time to struggle. By the time he came to his senses, the warmth of pheromones and the natural scent rising from Yuhan’s skin was wrapping around him.
“Wh — what are you doing?”
“Shh…. Relax. I’m not going to do anything.”
“No, but —”
For someone who said he wasn’t going to do anything, his hand came to rest against Jinwoo’s abdomen. The touch was so careful that he might not have noticed at all if the warmth hadn’t transferred through. A large, warm hand traced gently over the thin fabric of Jinwoo’s pajamas. When he was little and whined to his mother that his stomach hurt, he used to receive touches like this. It was the kind of touch that settled and soothed without trying.
Even though he had just woken up, he felt like he could fall asleep again if he closed his eyes. Jinwoo finally understood why pregnant omegas grew so anxious when they were separated from their alphas. Having experienced this kind of security, he could never go back to the way things were before.
“Little one. Don’t make it too hard on your daddy.”
A small laugh escaped him. Should he mention that the baby’s ears hadn’t even formed yet?
“Daddy needs to eat something so you can be born healthy, too.”
Why did that sound like he was worrying about him? In the end, what Yuhan wanted was a healthy baby — but he felt like this much of a misunderstanding was allowed. The doctor’s words drifted back to him: a calm mother makes for a calm child.
“If you have complaints, save them for when you’re born. Daddy will hear every single one of them then.”
“How many complaints could a baby even have?”
“Actually, not being able to speak or move is probably the most frustrating thing there is.”
The baby didn’t even have vocal cords yet, let alone arms or legs. Yuhan’s utterly matter-of-fact delivery made Jinwoo want to laugh. Lying in his arms like this, listening to that warm, gentle voice — it felt almost like they were dating. If they had met under normal circumstances, would things have been a little different?
He no longer felt that nauseating omega pheromone coming from Yuhan. If he said that out loud, how would Yuhan react?
Maybe I can allow myself to want a little more — Jinwoo had only just startled at his own thought, lips parting slightly, when —
“It must be suffocating, right?”
“I’d imagine so.”
He thought it was a continuation of the same conversation and answered as casually as he could, but Yuhan’s expression was strangely unreadable.
“No — I meant you, Jinwoo.”
“Me?”
The words slipped out in disbelief. He had naturally assumed it was still about the baby, not realizing Yuhan was referring to him.
It would be a lie to say he wasn’t suffocating. He was someone who used to love travel and long walks — and now he was confined, effectively under house arrest, told to take care of his body whether he liked it or not. Of course, if he were to step outside in this state, he’d be dry-heaving at every pheromone and food smell within minutes and end up turning back regardless. But even so — Jinwoo was suffocating.
“Our museum is hosting a debut exhibition for emerging artists this time….”
Without thinking, he turned around to look at Yuhan. I want to go. The thought of seeing work that was different from the polished pieces of seasoned artists already had him shifting in anticipation.
“Would you like to come see it?”
“Yes! When is it?”
“August 1st. It opens on Jinwoo’s birthday.”
“Oh — really?”
The original opening date had been August 4th, but Yuhan didn’t bother mentioning how much trouble he had gone through to move it up to Jinwoo’s birthday. He had pushed hard, driven by the thought that a little extra effort would let him see Jinwoo’s reaction — and in the end, he did. It felt more rewarding than he had expected. Something in his chest gave a sharp, electric thrill.
The eyes Jinwoo turned on him were bright and shining. Watching that lit-up expression, Yuhan wanted to give him more than just this — everything, really. The things he could do, and the things he couldn’t, by whatever means necessary.
“There’s about a month left, so come only if you’re feeling up to it. You don’t have to push yourself.”
“No, I definitely want to go! I’m so happy.”
Yuhan experienced his heart seizing to a stop — and then starting again.
“Yuhan?”
“Ah, yes. I’ll send someone for you, so come with them. It’s because I’m worried, so please don’t refuse.”
“Okay. Thank you for inviting me to such a wonderful exhibition.”
It wasn’t an empty sentiment — a pleasant scent was coming off Jinwoo. They said a person’s pheromones reflected their emotional state, and right now, Jinwoo’s excitement was impossible to miss without him saying a word. Yuhan found his own mood lifting in turn. It made all the complaints from the people he worked with worth it.
He had known for a while that Jinwoo was struggling with morning sickness and his pheromones, and he had always felt helpless because there was nothing he could do. All he had been able to offer was a little time each evening, sharing his pheromones with him — so it was a relief to have found at least this one way to do something for him.
In truth, this exhibition might as well have been prepared for Jinwoo. He had wanted to share something cultural with him, but Jinwoo kept his distance, and Yuhan respected that — so instead he had resolved to simply build the stage.
“I’ve brought together some wonderful artists, so I think you’ll be satisfied.”
The second reason was to keep Hajin in check.
He had a vague idea of why that guy was approaching Jinwoo. Another old bad habit resurfacing.
He knew that kindhearted Jinwoo hadn’t been able to fully cut off contact with Hajin even now. In that case, all he had to do was draw Jinwoo’s attention more and more toward this side — and make sure there was no reason left for him to reach out to Hajin.
“If there’s a piece you like, I’ll give it to you as a gift.”
“You really don’t have to —”
“Consider it a birthday present.”
Jinwoo was more than capable of buying it himself, so the gift was just an excuse. If there was something exchanged between them, he would think of him every time he looked at it. A strategy of sorts.
How long had it been since he had felt sincere affection for someone. Even in the middle of everything, the fact that he was scheming to win Jinwoo over made Yuhan want to laugh at himself. But it didn’t feel ridiculous. It felt like the natural next step — and whether what he felt for him was possessiveness, obsession, or something else entirely, he believed it could all be gathered under the single word: affection.
“Hopefully the baby will be a little less demanding a month from now….”
He carefully stroked Jinwoo’s flat stomach. The skin tensed briefly beneath his palm before relaxing again, every shift felt clearly through his hand. Yuhan, who had been granted the justification for contact through the baby, gave silent thanks to the small cluster of cells that didn’t even have a name yet.
Feeling the comfortable weight leaning against him, he turned his mind back to the night before. He had known the other party was someone he needed to impress, so playing along to some extent was expected — but he hadn’t anticipated them openly assigning an omega to serve as entertainment. And as if that wasn’t enough, it seemed they’d had the idea to get something on him, because they had kept pressing high-proof drinks on him one after another. If Jinseok hadn’t been there, things could have gone very wrong.
He remembered getting into the car — but after that, everything went dark. The only thing he could faintly recall was a dream.
He had forgotten about it until Jinwoo asked, but it was also a dream he could never, under any circumstances, tell him about.
Yuhan…, do it more…. Ah, there feels so good….
How could he ever tell him — that he had dreamed of Jinwoo, baring his white naked body, swaying his hips, luring him in? The sheer skill on display had made him realize immediately that it was a dream, but there was no escaping something that sweet.
He wasn’t some teenager — but when he woke from the dream and confirmed that he was rock hard, Yuhan had no choice but to admit it. Jinwoo had taken up far more space in his subconscious than he had realized.
Lately, Jinwoo had been doing comparatively better. He was still miserable from the morning sickness that refused to settle, but his pheromone levels had improved considerably, and he was no longer having hypersensitive reactions. Thanks to that, he was able to walk through the entrance of the exhibition Yuhan had invited him to with a light step.
“Jinwoo, was the trip here all right?”
“Yes. It was fine.”
What was there to struggle with? He had ridden the car Yuhan sent, and the driver hadn’t said a single word the entire way, driving with the smoothest touch imaginable. Yuhan had probably given instructions beforehand, but Jinwoo had unconsciously wrapped his arms around his own stomach — and still felt at ease. It meant nothing Yuhan had been worried about had come to pass.
