Meanwhile, Rou was able to reach the temple without resting even once, fueled by his urgent heart. He panted and ran without even properly catching his breath. Perhaps from lack of oxygen, Rou’s face gradually turned pale.
‘Huk.’
Just as he reached the temple and was about to feel relieved, Rou’s face became even more ashen.
His back felt suspiciously itchy. His ominous premonition was right on the mark. A pair of small wings had sprouted. As if reflecting Rou’s emotions directly, the wings moved on their own accord, creating a buzzing sound.
Compared to a human body, the wings were absurdly small. Smaller even than a pinky fingernail, naturally they couldn’t move or make Rou’s body fly. They simply dealt a major blow to his mental state.
“Ah, High Priest! Jes! The High Priest has arrived!”
“High Priest! You’ve returned safely!”
As the two approached, Rou quickly backed away. It was the first time the High Priest had avoided them so directly, so Yan looked on the verge of tears while Jes sent a worried gaze.
“High Priest. Has something happened?”
Jes carefully observed the High Priest.
He’d already pushed through an excessive schedule today. Usually frail to begin with, having overworked himself, naturally his complexion couldn’t be good. But even considering that, he was cowering and avoiding eye contact like someone gripped with fear.
‘Good heavens.’
Someone who normally remained steadfast no matter what was said was now shaken. What on earth had the emperor said to make him like this?
Jes approached the High Priest to soothe him, but the High Priest avoided his touch like someone uncomfortable with others’ contact. This was truly the first time the High Priest acted this way, so Jes and Yan were dumbfounded. The High Priest, who overflowed with love, was uncharacteristically on edge.
“I-I will offer prayers in the Room of Declaration. Don’t enter until I give permission.”
“What?”
“High Priest!”
If they came too close, they might hear the buzzing sound. Rou was terrified the sound would leak out. That he might completely transform into a bumblebee in front of the humans. Because of that, he couldn’t properly observe the worried expressions of the two humans and fled to the Room of Declaration to solve his own concerns.
In the Room of Declaration, as always, the Goddess’s Dew rippled. Rou stepped inside, pushing through the water. Hearing Jes and Yan’s voices in the distance made his heart even more frantic. Rou firmly locked the door. The moment he lowered the thick bolt, Rou transformed into a small bumblebee.
“Ah!”
Was it because he’d returned to being a bumblebee after so long? The motion of moving his wings felt somewhat awkward. When his body tilted to one side, he should beat his wings faster, but he kept moving his arms instead of his wings. Rou spun round and round before falling into the Goddess’s Dew.
– Splash!
Bubbles formed in the clear water. Though the clear sound echoed in the quiet room, it was like throwing a small pebble into a vast lake, so the transparent water’s surface quickly became calm again.
“Puhah!”
Rou frantically flapped his wings and barely rose above the water’s surface. He gasped and barely managed to fly up. Because his wings and body were wet, his wobbly flight was unstable, but still, the habit of flying for 500 years hadn’t gone anywhere, so Rou could quickly regain his sense.
Rou looked for a place to lie down. He didn’t even hope for a soft, warm cushion. He wanted to wipe off the moisture on his body in a dry place. Fortunately, there was a space between the decorative structures on the wall just big enough for his body to fit. Rou removed the water droplets from his body one by one.
“I’m saved.”
As soon as his body dried, Rou immediately prostrated himself on the floor. The stone floor wasn’t fragrant like inside flower petals, nor soft like atop a velvet cushion, but it was sufficient for his exhausted body to lie down and rest.
Many thoughts floated through his mind, but for now, he was tired enough to pass out. Rou was gradually entering a light sleep state while trying to organize his thoughts. His consciousness grew faint as if just before falling into Hibernation.
The breathing of the small creature was peaceful. Rou had fallen into sweet rest when at some point a familiar scent tickled his nose and his eyes flew open. It was the scent that came from the goddess.
“Goddess?”
《Rou.》
“Goddess!”
Rou bolted up and rushed into the goddess’s embrace. Goddess Kaine, as if accustomed to it, scratched Rou’s plump belly with her fingertip.
“Goddess. I missed you!”
《Rou. You’ve become gaunt. You’ve suffered much.》
“N-no. No, I’m fine! I’m really okay!”
Rou, terrified the goddess might tell him to return, told a lie he wasn’t even good at. The goddess, as if seeing through all of Rou’s heart, gently smiled and stroked his head.
《Rou. If you wish, you may return at any time. The velvet cushion is empty, so my heart is lonely too.》
“Goddess…”
《The child of Shadow doesn’t suit us. What you do for that child will ultimately only hurt you.》
“Goddess. Why didn’t Brukisel’s prayers reach you? Was it because he inherited Shadow blood that his prayers didn’t get through?”
《Yes. I wanted to help that pitiful child too. But for that child with Shadow power stronger than anyone, my power didn’t work. I… we… cannot help that child.》
Goddess Kaine looked pained. Rou understood the goddess’s heart. The goddess must have wanted to help Brukisel too. But there was no way for the goddess of abundance to help a child of Shadow.
《Rou. Inheriting Shadow blood means that. Being born with a fate where you must kill to survive. Even after hearing that he cruelly killed his own blood relatives, do you still wish to remain here?》
Rou understood what the goddess was saying. The goddess was worried he would be hurt. She was urging him to return, concerned he would feel helpless and depressed like today.
At the goddess’s earnest gaze, Rou couldn’t answer immediately and hesitated. Then soon, calmly but certainly, he expressed his intention.
“…I’m sorry, Goddess. But I’d still like to stay here for one year.”
Goddess Kaine slightly furrowed her beautiful brow as if feeling regretful. Rou tried not to look at Goddess Kaine’s face like that. Reborn as a Spirit, Rou’s lifelong goal was to please Goddess Kaine’s heart. So if he saw the goddess’s sad face, his heart would surely weaken.
When Rou couldn’t raise his head for a while, Kaine exhaled a deep breath like a sigh. Seeing Rou’s heart was still firm, she quickly abandoned the thought of taking him back.
《Then, do as you wish, Rou.》
The goddess lightly kissed Rou’s forehead. Then she disappeared, leaving only a sweet scent. Rou rubbed his forehead with his hand as if the goddess’s trace still remained.
“Huh?”
He had already returned to human form. It seemed the goddess, knowing this body had reached its physical limit, had personally descended. Rou offered a prayer of gratitude, bowed his head, and kissed the Goddess’s Dew. As if responding to such a Rou, dew poured down again from the ceiling.
Rou splashed around while picking up his clothes to put on. The Goddess’s Dew was warm, so sitting in Human Form only felt warm. Perhaps from receiving the goddess’s touch, his head was much clearer and his fatigue had also disappeared.
‘What do I do now?’
After hearing that dark story from Brukisel’s own mouth, his heart felt even heavier. He couldn’t just leave him like this. Turning away while knowing he was suffering was cowardly. It would be no different from the actions of his blood relatives who felt relieved seeing Brukisel atop the altar.
Actually, one method had come to Rou’s mind. But Rou hesitated whether he dared do such a thing. It wasn’t just his own problem. If he followed that method, the goddess would surely be greatly disappointed and saddened.
Rou deeply loved the goddess. That was a natural emotion a Spirit held for their creator. So he had never once dared to attempt anything that would sadden the goddess. That was why he’d never seen the goddess sad.
But after receiving help from Brukisel, Rou had descended to this land for the first time, going against the goddess’s will. Beside the goddess were other Spirits besides himself, and countless humans who loved and worshipped her, but beside Brukisel there was only himself.
‘If I use this method, the goddess won’t forgive me. She might never want to see me again.’
Rou suddenly felt his back itch. It was because sadness shook him.
‘But Brukisel… that child could be a little less lonely. But then the goddess would be sad…’
The image of the goddess crying tears of sadness flickered before his eyes. Rou instantly transformed into a bumblebee and fell into the Goddess’s Dew with a ‘splash!’
“Huk!”
Rou beat his wings again to rise above the water’s surface and gasped for breath. Fortunately, with a bit of concentration, he could return to human form.
His instinct as a Spirit wanting to bring only joy to the goddess and his desire to help Brukisel fought against each other. When such conflict continued, the human body couldn’t endure it, and because of that, Rou turned back into a small bumblebee again and again.
After that too, Rou went back and forth between bumblebee and human form countless times. Even when eating the meal Jes and Yan had left, even when quenching his thirst with the Goddess’s Dew because he was thirsty, Rou would transform into a bumblebee regardless of his will.
Yan and Jes, who had been pacing continuously in front of the Room of Declaration, occasionally heard clear sounds of something splashing. But since it was a small sound like large water droplets falling, the two humans didn’t pay much attention.
Splash!
The sound stopped one dawn, seven days later.
Rou, as if his resolve was set, kept his mouth firmly closed and clenched both fists tightly. He put on the clothes floating on the Goddess’s Dew in human form.
