“Darling, I’m sorry! Darling!! Come back!! Darling!!!!”
When he couldn’t bring himself to kill him and just turned around to flee from the place they’d lived together, he heard Mr. Park chasing after him from behind. Even at the desperate calls, Shim Iyul didn’t stop. There was no reason to stop. Even though Mr. Park had built up his stamina by going up and down mountains cutting trees and gathering medicinal herbs, there was no way he could catch up with Shim Iyul, who was half-yosu from the start.
The distance between them widened in an instant, and before long, Mr. Park’s voice could no longer be heard.
If he hadn’t been able to ignore Mr. Park’s cries that day and had stopped, what would he have tried to say? Would he have tried to make excuses for why he betrayed him? Or would he have begged for forgiveness?
‘Why does he keep appearing in my dreams lately?’
The deep mark of betrayal that Mr. Park had carved into his heart still remained, but it was already more than a hundred years ago. At first, it was agonizing every single day. It was painful even when he opened his eyes, and even when he slept, the moment of betrayal would revive as a nightmare, making things difficult for Shim Iyul. But after several decades passed, he was able to gradually bury the memories. The nightmares he’d had every day also gradually disappeared.
But lately, frequently dreaming about Mr. Park felt somehow unsettling. There should be no lingering attachment or emotion left, so why did he keep appearing in dreams to disturb his mind?
When he clicked his tongue with displeasure while distorting his face, the door opened. There was no need for the motion of turning his head to check who it was. It was Eun Seonmyeong. The now quite familiar hunter scent stimulated his sense of smell.
Shim Iyul twitched his nose. The subtle shampoo scent mixed with his original body scent was sweet. Shim Iyul turned his head to look at Eun Seonmyeong. It seemed like it would be even sweeter if he buried his nose in his skin and sniffed. If he licked with his tongue, what kind of taste would he feel……
‘I’m crazy!’
Shim Iyul shook his head violently. Even though his heat was definitely over, why was he constantly tormented by thoughts of wanting to do it—it was maddening. Even though they’d thoroughly rolled around in Jirisan, his desire for Eun Seonmyeong hardly subsided at all.
“What are you doing? Why are you shaking your head?”
“S-stretching. I have to do this every morning to make my body flexible.”
Shim Iyul, who had stopped shaking, muttered while covering his right head with his left hand and pulling.
“Do that later and come out. I prepared breakfast.”
With that dry and short conversation, the door closed again.
“9:20.”
Shim Iyul, who raised his head to check the clock, muttered.
After eating breakfast and going to buy Einspänner, it would be just right.
Heading to the kitchen, he saw toast and salad. Eun Seonmyeong was already eating. Shim Iyul also sat across from Eun Seonmyeong and tore the toast along the grain.
“……Why don’t you eat some vegetables too? Looking at you, your taste is biased.”
Eun Seonmyeong pushed the salad plate toward Shim Iyul, who was only eating bread. It was salad he’d bought from a nearby cafe early in the morning. While he ate things like meat or fish in surprisingly large amounts—making him wonder ‘Where does all that food go in that body?’ every time—he rarely saw him eat vegetables.
“You try being stuck in the mountains for a few years surviving on medicinal herbs. You’ll hate even looking at vegetables.”
Shim Iyul poked and ate one piece of lettuce, then pushed the plate back toward Eun Seonmyeong. It’s not that he hated vegetables, but for about half a year right after coming down from the mountain, he hated even looking at them.
“Why were you stuck in the mountains?”
“Because of my heat. Until my heat ended, I usually stayed stuck in the mountains. Because I didn’t want to encounter humans.”
“Come to think of it, you said your heat ends if you mix flesh with humans, right?”
“Yeah.”
“And you said you abstained for a hundred and twenty years.”
“……”
“That means you endured your heat without mixing flesh with humans for a hundred and twenty years.”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Huh?”
“Why did you abstain?”
“I made a promise with someone.”
“With whom and what promise?”
He’s being persistent today. Shim Iyul grimaced. He was betrayed by Mr. Park, and while indiscriminately captivating humans in his sense of betrayal, he was attacked by another Fire Fox and almost died, and Master Wonmi saved him, and so on. Explaining everything was bothersome. Most of all, he didn’t want to tell Eun Seonmyeong about Mr. Park. He didn’t want to mention that man—the only one he’d given his heart to and who betrayed him, planting deep distrust toward humans.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Tell me. What kind of promise, with whom you made the promise.”
“Why should I tell you?”
“……”
“We’re not in a relationship where I need to say things I don’t want to say, you and I. Aren’t we?”
At Shim Iyul’s sharp retort, Eun Seonmyeong’s expression hardened. Eun Seonmyeong stared at Shim Iyul tearing bread for a while, then spoke briefly.
“……You’re right. I don’t need to know.”
Shim Iyul’s words were right. Whoever he made a promise with was none of his business, and there was no reason he needed to know. But why was this so unpleasant? Why was his stomach bubbling? His lower abdomen felt queasy as if he’d gotten severe gastroenteritis. At the same time, his chest ached as if a sharply broken piece of glass had scraped down his heart.
“……”
“But why do I want to know?”
Eun Seonmyeong, who had been forcibly swallowing his uncomfortable feelings and chewing bread with difficulty, suddenly spoke.
“……What?”
“Why do I want to know everything about you?”
Just as Shim Iyul said, they were in a relationship where there was no need to know at all, yet he was curious. It was hard to resist the impulse to want to know everything about Shim Iyul. No, actually what bothered him most was the phrase ‘not in a relationship where we need to know.’ Even though there was no more accurate phrase than that to describe his relationship with Shim Iyul, why was it grating?
“Wh-why are you asking me that……”
Suddenly, a loud noise of someone barging through the gate was heard.
“Fox-nim!!!”
The owner of the booming voice was Ban Hanseong. Ban Hanseong went straight to the annex, then after confirming it was empty, came trudging back muttering “Where did you go again?”
“Why are you here so early in the morning?”
Eun Seonmyeong, who came out to the main hall, asked in a tone full of displeasure. Ban Hanseong’s eyes widened.
“Huh? Why are you here?”
“What’s the problem with me being in my own house?”
“Didn’t you say you were going to Jirisan? That’s what Seolju said.”
“I went and came back.”
“Already?”
“I came back at dawn. But why do you keep looking for the fox?”
Behind Eun Seonmyeong speaking irritably, Shim Iyul stuck out his head. Ban Hanseong, who discovered Shim Iyul, exclaimed in a hurt tone.
“Fox-nim! Where did you go yesterday? You didn’t even answer your phone!”
“I went somewhere. What’s the matter?”
Saying he went to Jirisan felt somehow embarrassing, so he vaguely deflected while subtly gauging Eun Seonmyeong’s reaction. Eun Seonmyeong didn’t say much.
“Yesterday afternoon Seolju told me to go check because the boiler repairman was coming. I came but Fox-nim wasn’t there, so I was so disappointed.”
Ban Hanseong, who pouted, rolled his eyes. As always, he’d wanted to enjoy eating delicious food with Shim Iyul while playing the game of badmouthing Eun Seonmyeong, but when he arrived, the house was completely empty—he didn’t know how disappointed he was. On top of that, Shim Iyul didn’t answer the phone and didn’t come home until late, so he eventually had to return home dejectedly.
“Did you repair the boiler?”
Eun Seonmyeong asked.
“I left a memo—didn’t you see it?”
“I didn’t see it.”
“I stuck it on the front of gaju’s door?”
“Are you a Joseon Dynasty human? What good is having a phone?”
At the mention that he left a memo despite having a perfectly good phone, Eun Seonmyeong shook his head.
“Do you know how much electromagnetic radiation would permeate my body while sending a message to gaju?! A memo has no electromagnetic radiation worries and is romantic too. Anyway, you really didn’t see it? I stuck it on well so it wouldn’t fall off.”
Ban Hanseong, who jumped up to the main hall, began looking around here and there while bending over.
“I said I didn’t see it.”
Eun Seonmyeong replied irritably, thinking ‘If I’d seen it, I would have hidden it.’ Then he looked back at Shim Iyul.
“Why are you looking at me? I didn’t see it either. It must have blown away in the wind.”
Shim Iyul lied while subtly avoiding Eun Seonmyeong’s gaze.
“Did it really blow away in the wind? Well, the wind was blowing extremely hard last night.”
Ban Hanseong, who gave up looking for the memo, said.
“See? I knew it. Why didn’t you stick it on the inside of the door instead of the outside so it wouldn’t blow away in the wind?”
“I guess I should have.”
Ban Hanseong scratched the back of his head. Shim Iyul put his hand in his pants pocket, feeling the texture of the memo caught on his fingers, and swallowed a sigh of relief. He’d almost been caught and greatly embarrassed. Then he shot a resentful glance at Ban Hanseong.
‘So clueless. He should have come a bit later to tell me.’
Because Ban Hanseong came running over, it looked like he’d have to return to the annex tonight and sleep alone. Sleeping next to Eun Seonmyeong was fun—no, warm.
Eun Seonmyeong also internally swallowed his complaint, thinking ‘Why does he come and go every day? Should I ban him from entering for a while?’ Only Ban Hanseong, who had no idea about Shim Iyul and Eun Seonmyeong’s uncomfortable feelings, spoke excitedly by himself.
“Ah, right. Gaju, I got a text from the company yesterday saying the delivery will come tomorrow. It said it’s scheduled to arrive tomorrow.”
“What delivery?”
“Didn’t I ask if it was okay to buy a wood-burning stove? Um, around there…… wouldn’t it be good to put it next to the stone lantern?”
“What…… did you buy?”
“Are your ears deaf? I said I bought a wood-burning stove. When I showed you and asked if I could buy it, didn’t you tell me to buy it? Fox-nim, when the stove comes, we can roast sweet potatoes, roast tangerines, and roast meat.”
“What nonsense……”
Eun Seonmyeong’s mouth, about to argue when did I tell you to buy it, closed. Only then did he remember Ban Hanseong holding out his phone asking if he could buy this. At that time, his body had heated up because of Shim Iyul, so he hurriedly left the spot and told him to do as he pleased without even looking—he never knew he’d cause such a major accident.
‘What kind of stove…… If he’s going to buy one, he should get it for his own house!’
Eun Seonmyeong suddenly got a throbbing headache and pressed firmly on his temples. As if he didn’t care about such feelings from Eun Seonmyeong, Ban Hanseong was excitedly bragging to Shim Iyul about the stove he’d bought.
“One of my dreams is to go camping with several people in the middle of winter, light a fire, and play. Two or three people feels somehow lonely, and the boring gaju or Seolju don’t seem like they’d go with me, so I was giving up, but I’m really glad Fox-nim came. With Fox-nim, that makes four, so it won’t be lonely and will be just right. Plus, if we install a stove in the yard, we can get the camping feeling without going far!”
“A wood-burning stove…… You can roast sweet potatoes and meat on it? Ooh, humans have made another interesting thing. That sounds fun.”
Just as he was about to shout to return it immediately, he saw Shim Iyul’s eyes sparkling as he agreed with Ban Hanseong’s words. Eun Seonmyeong sighed while making eye contact with Shim Iyul, who was looking this way full of anticipation. He couldn’t bring himself to say no. Eun Seonmyeong ended up permitting it even while being self-deprecating, thinking ‘Why should I be swayed by the eyes of a mere fox?’
“Do as you please.”
After shaking his head and speaking in a resigned tone, he was returning to the kitchen when Shim Iyul shouted from behind, “I’m going to buy coffee!”
It seemed he was going to buy that Einspänner again.
“Fox-nim, I’ll have a vanilla latte!”
Ban Hanseong hurriedly called out.
“Okay!”
Shim Iyul answered. At the obedient reply, he hurriedly came out to see, but his figure was already gone. Such quick actions—what an obedient fox. To go readily without a single refusal when asked to buy something.
‘That Hanseong, who does he think he’s ordering around?’
Eun Seonmyeong glared at Ban Hanseong with displeasure.
“Why, why are you staring like that?”
Ban Hanseong, frightened by Eun Seonmyeong’s fierce gaze, hunched his shoulders.
“……”
“If you have something to say, say it.”
“Something to say…… I don’t.”
He almost said ‘Buy your own coffee’ but came down from the main hall. If he said that, he’d ask ‘What does gaju care?’ but there was no answer to give.
He couldn’t say he hated seeing the sight of Shim Iyul, who talked back at every word to him, listening to his words without showing any sign of displeasure, could he?
