It was early summer. Old Woman Kim, who had cut a few slices of watermelon her daughter had brought, left the house. It was to give them to the little kid living in basement unit 1. Since a while ago, the seven-year-old child who no longer even went to kindergarten spent all day alone, which pained her, so she often gave him food and played with him.
“Seungjin-ah? Are you there?”
When she knocked on the door, the child peeked his face out. The child with cute chubby cheeks bowed his head politely.
“Grandma!”
“What were you doing?”
“It’s Mom’s birthday today, so I was writing a card.”
“Really? Today’s your mom’s birthday?”
“Yes!”
When she entered inside, she saw colored paper scattered messily in the narrow living room. Imagining the sight of him making a card to give his mother with his tiny hands like a fern brought a pleased smile to her face naturally.
“Seungjin is so admirable.”
Old Woman Kim patted Lee Seungjin’s head. Lee Seungjin smiled shyly with a “hehe,” then soon hung his head dejectedly.
“I hope Mom comes home soon.”
Though he’d said ‘Mom, come home early’ while kissing his mother’s cheek as she left for work in the morning, his mother usually returned only late in the evening. Normally, to be a good child who listened well, he would eat the meal his mother had prepared and left alone, play alone, and wait quietly. It had been boring since he couldn’t even go to kindergarten lately, but he didn’t whine about wanting to go again. But today he was a bit upset. He’d really worked so hard on it. He wanted to quickly show his mother the card that said ‘I love you, Mom. I’ll be a good Seungjin’ and boast about it.
“You want to give your present quickly?”
“Yes! I want to give it quickly. Mom’s present. Grandma, if I give her the card, will Mom hug me tight and tell me I’m good?”
“Of course, naturally. …Should Grandma take you to your mom?”
“Really? You’ll really take me?”
“Yes. Grandma will take you.”
She was planning to go out shopping for a present for her grandson who would be born soon anyway. Though it was a bit far, it seemed she could just go to the department store where Seungjin’s mother, the young woman, worked. Old Woman Kim returned home to get her wallet, then headed to the department store holding the hand of Lee Seungjin, who was stomping his feet saying “Grandma, hurry!!”
But she didn’t know which floor the young woman worked on. She only remembered that about two weeks ago, she’d asked ‘Could you look in on our Seungjin once during the day?’ saying she was lucky enough to start part-time work at a promotional event, and she’d said yes. The young woman, busy with work, didn’t answer her phone either.
Standing at the back door of the department store wondering what to do, she felt Lee Seungjin staring at a snack bar about ten meters away.
“Are you hungry?”
“N-no.”
“Should Grandma buy you tteokbokki?”
“It’s okay. I’m not hungry.”
The child’s stomach rumbled as he waved his hand saying it was okay. It seemed he’d skipped lunch making the card for his mother. Old Woman Kim smiled broadly and headed to the snack bar with the child.
“One serving of tteokbokki, please. Make it not spicy since a child will eat it.”
“It’s really okay though.”
“You can stay here eating tteokbokki for a bit, right? Your mom seems too busy to answer the phone. Grandma will go bring your mom. You have to stay right here, okay?”
“Yes! You have to bring Mom, okay?”
“Yes. I will.”
After making a promise with Lee Seungjin by hooking pinkies, Old Woman Kim left the snack bar. She thought she’d buy a present for her grandson first, then look for the young woman. It seemed better to move around alone and unencumbered rather than bringing the child. Since he was a quiet child who listened well, he would wait at the snack bar without going anywhere.
It was just as she’d left the snack bar and entered through the department store’s back door. She heard a “boom” sound from behind. Startled, Old Woman Kim clutched her chest and fell to the ground, then thought ‘surely not’ and looked back. The snack bar where she’d left Lee Seungjin was on fire.
“What? Is it a gas explosion?”
“There’s a fire over there.”
“What should we do? Shouldn’t we call 119?”
The surroundings began to become noisy and chaotic. Old Woman Kim staggered to her feet.
“S-Seungjin……”
With a dazed expression, she only repeated Lee Seungjin’s name over and over. Then at one moment—
“Seungjin is at the hospital. Because he’s sick.”
Old Woman Kim, who had been muttering to herself, staggered through the crowd and returned home.
“S-Seungjin-ah!”
Old Woman Kim’s face was drenched in cold sweat as she bolted upright, calling Lee Seungjin’s name.
“Mother-in-law, what’s wrong?!”
Her daughter-in-law, who had been making porridge for her mother-in-law who had fallen into a deep afternoon nap without even eating lunch, came running with a ladle in hand.
“Seungjin……”
“Seungjin? You’ve been talking about Seungjin a lot lately. Oh my, look at this cold sweat. Mother-in-law? Why are you crying?”
The daughter-in-law hurriedly pulled out a handkerchief from the drawer. Then she wiped the face of her mother-in-law, Old Woman Kim, who was staring into space and crying endlessly. Old Woman Kim continued sobbing. Like a child who’d lost their parents, like a mother who’d lost her child. The daughter-in-law held Old Woman Kim, who was even beating her chest as she cried, not knowing what to do.
“Why are you crying like this? Did you have a bad dream? You’ll collapse at this rate. Wait a moment. I’ll get you water.”
As Old Woman Kim lay down with her daughter-in-law’s help, a small bird-shaped paper fell from her body and crumbled into ashes.
“I’m crazy. I’m a crazy bitch!”
Old Woman Kim beat her chest repeatedly while lying down and cried again.
“Why are you crying again?!”
“I, I did it. I did it!”
“Did what?”
“S-Seungjin, I took him. Because Seungjin wanted to see his mom…… I left the child at a snack bar near the back of the department store where the young woman works and stepped out for a moment, but a f-fire broke out……”
“Wh-what do you mean?!”
“He must have died, right? There’s no way the child could have survived in those flames. He died. That’s right, he died. They said a child’s body came out of the fire scene.”
Old Woman Kim spoke incoherently, and the daughter-in-law turned pale, understanding what her mother-in-law was saying.
“You’re saying Seungjin died?! Why didn’t you say anything until now! How much has that young woman been searching for Seungjin!!!”
The daughter-in-law’s voice grew loud. She too was a mother raising a child. That’s why she’d pitied Lee Seungjin’s mother, who was frantically searching everywhere for her son.
“I, I was scared. Because I took the child for no reason…… I, I killed him. I killed Seungjin!!!”
“Mother-in-law!”
“L-let’s go to the young woman. We have to go to the young woman and tell her that, that because of my mistake Seungjin died……”
The daughter-in-law stared blankly at Old Woman Kim, who continued beating her chest and wailing, then staggered to her feet. Then she took out a coat from the wardrobe and handed it to Old Woman Kim.
“Put it on. I know where the young woman is. We have to go tell her.”
The young woman had told them where she was currently staying, asking them to please contact her if her son happened to come by. The daughter-in-law said “Y-yes, we should. We have to go apologize,” but led Old Woman Kim, who hesitated with a frightened face, out of the house. This wasn’t something that could be avoided. Right after Lee Seungjin went missing, they’d worried it might be dementia since her mother-in-law was confusing memories and even got tested at the hospital, but the results were fine. They’d just thought she was getting old and confused him with the child upstairs. But it seemed when the child died due to her own mistake, she’d cowardly manipulated her memories.
The young woman wasn’t at the inn. The daughter-in-law and Old Woman Kim lingered in front of the inn waiting for the young woman to return. The young woman returned with a tired face only as the sun was setting, spotted Old Woman Kim and her daughter-in-law, and came running.
“Wh-why are you here? C-could it be our Seungjin came back?!”
“Well, young woman……”
“Why, why is that?”
Sensing an ominous feeling seeing the daughter-in-law with a poor complexion and Old Woman Kim who only cried, the young woman hesitated. Old Woman Kim grabbed the hand of the young woman, whose complexion had instantly turned ashen, and began confessing, “I-it’s my fault. I……”
“S-Seungjin-ahhh!!!!”
A heartbreaking wail spread throughout the alley filled with old buildings. Kang Eunsuk collapsed to the ground. Her hands scratched the concrete floor. Her fingertips quickly became torn and blood oozed out.
“Y-young woman…… I, I was wrong. This old woman took the child for no reason……”
“Don’t lie! There’s no way our Seungjin died!”
“Young woman……”
“Go! If you’re going to stab my heart with such lies, then leave!!!”
Kang Eunsuk pushed away the daughter-in-law who tried to hold her hand as if to comfort her and glared at Old Woman Kim with resentful eyes. She couldn’t believe it. That her son had died. That her son, who was her everything, had died in a fire right near where she worked and she hadn’t known—she didn’t deserve to be called a mother.
She knew about the snack bar accident too. She’d heard the “boom” sound and heard that a fire had broken out at the snack bar, but at the time she was busy organizing items in the storage room and had no capacity to pay attention. Only after work did she click her tongue at the blackened remains, but the child who’d died in that fire was her own child.
“Go! I said leave!!!”
The daughter-in-law looked down at Kang Eunsuk, who sat collapsed only repeating for them to leave, not knowing what to do, then said “Young woman, we’ll go for today,” and left, leading Old Woman Kim away. Hearing the footsteps growing distant, Kang Eunsuk shed tears.
“How hot and painful it must have been, Seungjin-ah…… Our Seungjin. No, it can’t be our Seungjin! Our Seungjin is alive!!!”
Kang Eunsuk’s face looked shabby, as if she’d aged ten years in an instant, wavering between wanting to not believe it and thinking Old Woman Kim’s words were probably true. She lay prostrate on the ground and cried. The fact that the son she’d searched for so desperately was already dead was devastating. It felt like someone had torn her heart to shreds. She couldn’t forgive herself for not sensing that her son had died.
“Seungjin-ah, our Seungjin.”
How hot must it have been. They say burns are one of the most unbearable pains in the world. How did that young child travel that long road alone? How did he walk that lonely and difficult path by himself?
‘I should have gone with him. I should have held his hand so our Seungjin wouldn’t be scared!’
Someone approached her as she crawled on the ground, crying endlessly in despair and grief. When she raised her head with a face covered in tears, she saw familiar faces. They were the two men she’d seen yesterday evening. The taller, more handsomely masculine one bent down and rubbed her forehead with his thumb. Kang Eunsuk’s eyes widened as she was about to flinch and yell at him asking what he was doing. She saw her son smiling brightly before her eyes.
“S-Seungjin-ah?!”
“Mom!”
Lee Seungjin hugged Kang Eunsuk.
“Seungjin-ah! You were alive. I knew it! I knew you hadn’t died. Where have you been all this time?!”
Kang Eunsuk shouted and asked. She cried and laughed at the same time, unable to even blink her eyes for fear the child would disappear again.
“Mom, take this.”
Lee Seungjin, who pushed Kang Eunsuk back for a moment, took out colored paper folded in half and cut into a heart shape from his pocket and held it out. When Kang Eunsuk received the paper and unfolded it, it said in crooked letters ‘I love you, Mom. I’ll be a good Seungjin.’ Tears that had stopped for a moment poured out again. She hurriedly wiped away her tears. She couldn’t bear for her son’s face to become blurred because of tears.
“I have to go now.”
“Wh-where are you going?”
“I have to go now. Mom, later…… Much later…… Um, after sleeping a thousand nights, you have to come. Seungjin will come out to meet you.”
“Seungjin-ah! What are you saying? Where are you going?!!”
“Mom, I love you.”
The moment she tried to pull her son into an embrace as if she could never let him go, the man from before rubbed her forehead with his thumb again. Then she could no longer see her son. Kang Eunsuk looked around desperately, saying “Seungjin-ah?!”
“What did you do! Our Seungjin……”
At that moment, the other man touched Kang Eunsuk’s forehead, and she collapsed and lost consciousness.
