Since he was on the phone anyway, he opened the message window to send Dowon a message. This morning too, he’d replied to a text asking about the hospital appointment that he’d let him know once the schedule was set. But as if that wasn’t satisfactory enough, the reminder that arrived again was quite firm, making it seem like he could hear Dowon’s voice.
I scheduled the hospital visit for the afternoon of the 16th. If it’s difficult because of work hours, you can come together next time.
After sending the concisely written message, he reached for the cup to drink the tea when the phone in his hand rang. Dowon’s name appeared together in the notification window. As the message rang again in succession, he hurriedly checked it and ended up laughing a little.
Han Dowon
Tell me the time and hospital too. I’ll go together.
But isn’t the 16th the day before the final broadcast?
He didn’t know whether to call it attentiveness or an occupational hazard that he immediately pointed out even the broadcast schedule that Muyoung himself had forgotten. Of course, even if he weren’t someone working in the same industry, he now knew that he was definitely someone who would pay attention like this. While his personality seemed like he wouldn’t pay attention to his surroundings, this kind of attentiveness that occasionally showed itself might have been what gradually pulled him out of his helplessness.
Before the tea got even cooler, he slowly finished drinking it while pressing the keyboard to reply. The deeper Muyoung’s smile grew, the more letters his fingers pressed appeared on the screen.
***
“It would be better to go leisurely and wait, right?”
“Yes, we might get stuck in traffic on the way anyway.”
Muyoung, who got into the van that came to pick him up at the scheduled time, answered Section Manager Kim’s question while fastening his seatbelt. There was still time before filming, but both Section Manager Kim and Muyoung felt more comfortable going to the site and waiting there.
“Did you get breakfast? I bought some kimbap, it’s back there.”
“No, that worked out well. What about you, Section Manager?”
“I ate as soon as I bought it. I also got drinks, so eat slowly.”
Nodding and roughly filling his stomach while sitting in his seat, the sound of the radio reached Muyoung’s ears. It was the broadcast Section Manager Kim, who was driving, always had on. Even though it was advertisements playing randomly, the volume wasn’t loud enough to be particularly bothersome, and the DJ’s voice couldn’t be heard well either.
With his mouth full of kimbap, chewing while looking out the window, a familiar song reached Muyoung’s ears. On the street trees he was looking at absentmindedly, he saw leaves that had already begun to turn yellow. Finding it novel today that he could tell from the seasons that filming that started in spring was ending, he also recalled the things that had happened in between.
Yesterday, he’d filled the refrigerator that had been empty. The whole time he went to the mart near his house and shopped, he looked around slowly without worrying about whispered words or staring eyes. A salesclerk in the food section who tilted her head saying his face looked familiar and one customer he encountered at the mart recognized him, but that was all. It had been a place he’d come to often until the tabloid rumors circulated, but he’d avoided it for a while. But just reconfirming that he no longer needed to react oversensitively made him feel a bit lighter.
After filling his cart with bulgogi he could easily cook, some vegetables, some fruit, drinks, and a few other side dishes, the cart was packed full. Moving the items wasn’t a burden, but it was difficult to gauge exactly what was needed. Normally it would have come to mind right away, but he couldn’t remember at all. While pushing the cart and looking around the whole time, he had to reflect on himself for how much he’d let go of daily living.
After returning with both hands full, while filling the refrigerator, he had to repeatedly put in and throw out the items he’d bought and the things that needed to be discarded. There were things he needed to buy but didn’t, and things he didn’t need to buy but did. He regretted not making a memo on his phone before going, but since it was already too late, he gave up quickly.
While organizing things one by one, Dowon had contacted him. Hearing him say he had a bit of free time while moving so he called for a moment, Muyoung took out the bulgogi he’d eat for dinner and placed it on the sink. Then he stopped his hands at a question that came out of the blue.
─ What are you doing at home right now?
‘Ah… I’d just gone shopping so I was in the middle of organizing. Was it noisy?’
─ No, I was just curious. What Muyoung-ssi is doing and moving around in that house right now…
‘…Well, everyone’s similar. When they’re not working.’
─ Is that so? I don’t think so.
Thinking it was somehow a ticklish thing to say, he played dumb and dodged Dowon’s question. Even so, worried that noise might be heard together for no reason, he quietly took out mushrooms and glass noodles and placed them on top of the pack containing bulgogi when he casually asked Dowon.
‘You’re eating meals while working, right, CEO-nim?’
─ I’m not someone who would work while starving. It’s also late now.
‘…That’s right. It’ll be dinner soon.’
─ I had breakfast simply. I made sure to eat lunch. Should I tell you the menu I ate too?’
‘…’
Though it wasn’t his intention, he felt like he’d somehow ended up interrogating him and couldn’t say anything in response. He didn’t even realize how his question must have looked until Dowon, who’d been waiting for a moment, laughed and continued speaking.
─ Ask me anything you’re curious about. We’re in a relationship where we can ask and answer at least that much now, aren’t we?
‘…That’s true. Really.’
A relationship where he could ask anything. He repeated the words over and over in his mouth in a voice small enough that it wouldn’t be transmitted to Dowon. Among many things he couldn’t gauge, there was a reason why only this relationship came across particularly clearly to him. The driving force that allowed him to gradually pick up the daily life that had collapsed to the point where he himself hadn’t immediately noticed—perhaps it was these kinds of words he gave.
‘…I’m going to make bulgogi for dinner. With mushrooms and glass noodles.’
─ Bulgogi sounds delicious. I was going to have to grab something outside today anyway, so maybe I’ll eat something similar.
The stories they briefly shared until they finished the call after that were similar. Worries like how he needed to eat warm meals or that he needed to gain a bit more weight. Was it because of the welcome concern he’d heard before and Dowon’s voice that seemed more cheerful than usual today? After bickering about whether he’d really eat the same thing and why he had to, the conversation ended with them deciding to take photos of what they ate and compare.
After finishing the call like that and finishing preparations, just as he was eating, the photo from Dowon that arrived made Muyoung have to spend a long time selecting a photo to send too. He did send it since he’d promised, but none of the photos he’d taken from when he started preparing dinner were quite to his liking. Especially the bulgogi he’d poured his heart into with the addition of mushrooms and glass noodles didn’t look particularly delicious or neat.
However, his mood improved a bit at Dowon’s text asking without hesitation if he’d make it for him next time as soon as he checked the photo Muyoung sent. Even though he knew it was obviously a childish trick, even though he’d mixed in some aegyo. Of course, he deliberately didn’t answer.
“A relationship where I can ask anything…”
“Hm? What did you say?”
Section Manager Kim, who was driving, must have heard Muyoung’s voice muttering to himself unconsciously while mulling over yesterday’s events.
“No, it’s nothing.”
“Looks like we’ll arrive soon. Traffic is lighter than I thought.”
“It’s good if we arrive early.”
Muyoung, who nodded and answered, moved his gaze outside again. While the car briefly stopped at a traffic light, he captured the sky he could see with his phone camera. The clouds rising between the trees in a round shape felt somehow cute. They looked like appetizing ice cream and also like cotton balls that would puff up somewhere. After staring at the photo for a while and looking around outside, he fiddled with his phone at a thought that suddenly occurred to him.
Make sure to eat your meals well today too.
After hesitating, Muyoung sent the message along with the photo to Dowon. Half his heart hoped he wouldn’t check it right away, while the other half seemed to compete inside him with curiosity about what reaction he’d show.
Han Dowon
Muyoung-ssi, do well at filming today too.
A photo arrived of a coffee cup on what appeared to be an office desk, looking like he’d drunk a bit. The tension around his mouth that had been tightly wound while waiting for a reply loosened. It was right before entering filming.
Passing among the staff moving busily and standing near the camera waiting for a moment while taking a deep breath, Muyoung saw Seo Kyungju approaching him and bowed in greeting. There were scenes they’d film together today, and unfortunately it was the first shoot. It was the scene where the male lead, ignoring his friend’s final advice, shook off his friend right before meeting the female lead. It wasn’t a short and simple scene, but since there wasn’t much movement, it seemed the filming would wrap up easily. At least that’s what Muyoung thought.
─Cut.
But the progress didn’t go as well as he’d thought. At first they had to take a break because the lighting caused a problem, but after that, NGs kept piling up because of Seo Kyungju. There weren’t even any major flubbed lines or problems.
“I’m sorry. The timing with Muyoung-ssi just isn’t working out.”
─If this drags on any longer, let’s film a different scene first and come back to this. Let’s do well!
At Seo Kyungju’s wisecrack, everyone came over with exhaustion evident on their faces but said it was fine. The director seemed to have noticed that he wasn’t concentrating and kept getting off, but didn’t say anything in particular. In the end, the situation flowed into the filming dragging on because of Muyoung’s fault.
Vaguely knowing the problem was with Seo Kyungju rather than himself, Muyoung didn’t show it and just bowed his head toward the surroundings from where he stood, saying he was sorry. He’d already been prepared to endure this level of discomfort, so it didn’t bother him much. But Seo Kyungju, who’d been continuously filming with Muyoung, apparently didn’t feel the same.
“Let’s do well, Muyoung-ssi. Isn’t today the wrap-up?”
“That’s right. I’ll be careful. I’m sorry.”
There wasn’t a speck of malice in Seo Kyungju’s words as he patted Muyoung’s shoulder. But the gaze looking at Muyoung was different. Muyoung quickly lowered his head, and with his attitude of not giving any opening, he hoped Seo Kyungju wouldn’t say anything more. All Muyoung wanted was for Seo Kyungju to finish filming safely. At this point, it felt burdensome to respond that it wasn’t his fault, and having any disturbance interfere felt more tiresome to begin with.
