It was quite rare for me to rebel against hyung-nim’s words.
Even after becoming a full-grown high school student, when Jeongwoo hyung-nim told me to do something, I would follow his words without complaint.
Of course, that was partly because hyung-nim’s words were always reasonable. But I would have unconditionally listened to his words even if hyung-nim’s orders were somewhat unreasonable.
It was the same when both families whispered, “Hajin’s finally hit puberty too.”
I just became less talkative in front of adults and kept a slight distance from Jeongwoo hyung-nim. I didn’t cause trouble at school, and I had never once rebelled against my parents or, of course, Jeongwoo hyung-nim.
For me to say “No hyung-nim, that’s a bit much.” It was predictable that hyung-nim would be surprised when I showed my displeasure.
Sure enough, hyung-nim immediately stared at me with an expression that said “Where did this come from!”
Of course, it was just his thick and perfect eyebrows, as if God himself had taken up a brush to draw them with care, furrowing all at once.
“Huk……!”
But whether it was because of my childhood memories, or because Jeongwoo hyung-nim was too big of an adult to me, I immediately shrank even at hyung-nim’s small change in expression.
“What are you going to do? Can you come in by eleven?”
Hyung-nim urged an answer in a stern voice, but no matter what, I couldn’t say I understood.
I was just starting to enjoy my freedom, and now a curfew I didn’t even have in high school! I shook my head side to side.
“Still, eleven is too early. No one goes home that early.”
“There’s no one with a curfew?”
“Yes.”
Actually, it wasn’t that there were no friends with set curfew times, there were some. Also, regardless of alpha or omega, although everyone played together with one mind, everyone tended to be more concerned and worried about the girls’ and omegas’ way home.
“N-no one. Really, it’s different from the old days……”
“Really? Kids these days don’t have curfews?”
Hyung-nim raised his eyebrows. I nodded vigorously.
Whether there were kids with curfew times or not wasn’t important at all. More important than that was the fact that I was a college student just starting to taste freedom.
“Hmm.”
But at this moment, if Jeongwoo hyung-nim said something like “still, you’re an omega so you need to be careful,” I was willing to pretend to lose and listen.
If Mom and Dad said such things, I would have pretended to listen while thinking it was overprotective, but if it came from hyung-nim’s mouth, the situation was a bit different.
Because that would be proof that hyung-nim hadn’t forgotten that I was an omega.
Well, of course I am an omega though. How about adding that? I briefly contemplated while avoiding hyung-nim’s gaze.
Hyung-nim, who had no idea what I was thinking, looked at me silently. He seemed to be thinking for a moment, then raised his wrist to check his watch.
“Let’s see, right now it’s…… eleven o’clock.”
The words that followed from hyung-nim were absurd beyond belief.
“See, I came home by eleven too. Then Hajin should do the same.”
“Huh?”
What kind of childish nonsense was this out of nowhere? I doubted my ears. But hyung-nim’s face was completely calm.
Why was he suddenly being unreasonable in a way that didn’t suit him?
“Hyung-nim, why are you saying something that doesn’t make sense?”
“What doesn’t make sense? I’m saying we both come home at eleven.”
Certainly, since the day I came home drunk past midnight, hyung-nim seemed determined to keep an eye on me.
It was definitely unusual for hyung-nim to say such nonsense.
“Hyung-nim…… Don’t say strange things. I don’t know about today, but it’ll be hard to do that every day from now on.”
“Were you always this disobedient?”
When I remained unmoved even by his childish nonsense, hyung-nim seemed to finally confirm that my will was more stubborn than he thought.
I felt a sting somehow in his quietly muttered words.
“These days you seem to be talking back again. At first I was even glad, but now not at all.”
“……”
“I’m sure your puberty is over.”
Even with a cold gaze that seemed very displeased. My heart immediately lurched.
“That bastard Yoo Jeongyeon must have rubbed off on you a lot. I separated you two and now you’re the troublemaker.”
Hyung-nim is really too much.
“Fine, do as you please. There should be a time when you try doing everything you want.”
If you tell me to do as I please, but show this disappointed face after just one act of rebellion, what am I supposed to do?
Actually, I was even glad to hear hyung-nim’s nagging after so long. But now his eyes seemed to say “I nagged you thinking of our past affection, but I’m giving up on you now.”
Without even knowing what state I’m actually in. To dismiss my desperate rebellion as just “puberty.”
In the once-in-a-lifetime college life, this might be my last freedom before death. I just enjoyed it a little. Even if I’ve done wrong a few times lately while wandering before death, this was too much.
“Come to think of it, you said you’re not going to school, so where are you going now?”
When he didn’t even come home all night, doing who knows what and where. Looking at his appearance that didn’t look haggard at all and was only perfect, it definitely didn’t seem like he worked overtime all night.
Sexually conservative and prudish, my ass. Impotent, my ass.
Who he spent the night with and what kind of night, when I don’t even have the confidence to hear the truth from hyung-nim so I can’t even ask.
“……I don’t know.”
Suddenly, this unequal relationship between hyung-nim and me felt painfully unfair. This relationship that had solidified and been completed over my entire life of growing up.
Probably even if I died and woke up again, the relationship between hyung-nim and me couldn’t change.
“Nearby……”
I rudely cut off hyung-nim’s words trying to say something and poured out my surging words.
“If I just come in by eleven, it doesn’t matter where I go anyway!”
When you’re not even truly worried anyway.
I hated hyung-nim so much for still trying to nag me like a parent when I’d already grown up. After glaring at hyung-nim for a moment, I turned around and ran out immediately.
Actually, maybe I got more upset because hyung-nim asked where I was going.
Today was the day to go to the hospital.
***
As a child who was gentle and mild-mannered, I particularly hated going to the hospital.
Since I apparently troubled Mom and Dad only on hospital days from the time I was crawling, it was probably closer to an innate temperament than a learned fear from somewhere.
At the hospital, I hated the distinctive smell, I hated the cold air, and I hated shots even more.
The part I hated most was the premonition that the moment I went there, something terribly painful would happen to me. Whether from discovering a new illness or from the pain accompanying the treatment process.
When the day came to go to the hospital, it was a day when Mom and Dad were extremely tense from the crack of dawn to humor me. Because I, who was usually only gentle, would absolutely refuse to go to the hospital, crying and throwing a tantrum.
Because I hated the hospital so much, I would endure and get through it to the end no matter how sick I was.
For example, when I was six, I fell from the slide while playing with Jeongyeon at the playground.
A sharp pain arose in my bumped arm, but I didn’t say anything particular to the adults. Naturally, the adults thought it was fine since the child said he was okay.
I immediately got up and hopped around to the adults who came running to me in surprise, showing them it didn’t hurt at all. Since it was my arm and not my leg that was hurt, I could naturally hop around.
It was Saturday morning the next day when I felt something was wrong with my arm. After wolfing down breakfast, I ran straight to Jeongwoo hyung, who wasn’t going to school, and was receiving snacks on hyung’s lap.
“Hyung, can I draw?”
“Yeah, should I get you colored pencils? Jeongyeon probably has some.”
I carefully climbed down from his lap to go get the colored pencils that would be in Jeongyeon’s room.
“Ah-!”
At that moment, tremendous pain arose in my right arm that I’d casually placed on hyung’s knee. I unconsciously made a small sound, then carefully climbed down from the chair using my other arm.
However, I couldn’t go to the bathroom. Because hyung immediately grabbed my shoulder.
“You said you fell at the playground yesterday, right?”
“Yes.”
I nodded. Hyung, who crouched down, held my throbbing right arm with both hands.
When my slender arm was held by hands as large as Dad’s, I couldn’t help but be tense. Normally it would have been fine, but I was scared of what would happen if strong hyung carelessly pulled my injured arm.
However, hyung held my arm very carefully and examined my expression while rotating around my wrist or elbow area very slightly.
“Didn’t it hurt? I heard you didn’t go to the hospital.”
“It hurt a lot. I’m fine now.”
I absolutely hated going to the hospital just in case. So I quickly added that I was fine. Actually, if I didn’t touch my arm, it didn’t hurt. And then.
“Ah-!”
“……”
I suddenly felt the same pain as before and screamed. At that moment, hyung’s eyes sharpened.
Meeting hyung’s eyes, I froze like an injured herbivore placed before a predator’s teeth.
It was a very instinctive reaction.
