“Really? You…… you’ve even kissed someone……?”
I was so shocked that I didn’t even think about how stupid that question might sound. The implication was clear. It meant I was an innocent fool who hadn’t even kissed anyone at this age.
Following Jeongyeon, everyone had betrayed me. Suddenly, I felt like I was the only one who still hadn’t escaped high school student status.
As I struggled to recover from the shock, Choi Jihwan raised his eyebrows, looking just as surprised as I was.
“You haven’t?”
That question made it seem like he’d never seen someone like me before, so I hurriedly answered.
“No, I have too, you know? Of course I have.”
“Doesn’t seem like you have.”
Honestly, I’d naturally assumed Choi Jihwan hadn’t done it either, just like me. Because until just moments ago, I’d firmly believed he was a model student with no experience, a goody-two-shoes just like me.
But looking at his reaction now, that didn’t seem to be the case. He didn’t even seem to believe what I was saying.
“You’re right, I actually haven’t……”
Having answered dejectedly, since I’d already failed at looking cool anyway, I asked honestly.
“Then have you done other things too?”
“Yeah.”
“Wow, lucky you.”
I thought most people wouldn’t have done that much at least. The friend I’d just made suddenly seemed like a different kind of adult than me. Like I was meeting a teacher or something?
As I marveled at this, the tips of Choi Jihwan’s ears had turned slightly red. I could tell he was feeling embarrassed. At the same time, my vision kept going blurry and then clear again repeatedly. I said dazedly.
“Ah, sorry! I shouldn’t just ask about stuff like this, right?”
“No, it’s fine. It’s just that we’re too much out in the open here.”
Choi Jihwan glanced around at the empty space for a moment before asking.
“Looking at how the guys keep staggering over there, they must be really drunk. The cleanup’s going to be exhausting, so should we leave first? I’ll take you home.”
“Huh? No, I can go by myself.”
I waved my hands dismissively as I got up from my seat. I almost staggered a bit but managed to maintain my balance.
“Still, it’s dangerous for an omega to go home alone late at night. Let’s get you home quickly before you get scolded by your hyung-nim like last time.”
“Uh, I’m really fine though……”
Before I could properly decline, he’d already left the bar. I had no choice but to follow him.
Since it wasn’t yet the last train time, we took the subway and quickly arrived near my house. My house was in a residential area, so no matter how much I tried to dissuade him, saying it was quite a walk from the station, Choi Jihwan insisted that was all the more reason he should take me home.
“You took me home like this last time too?”
“Yeah, it’s quite a long walk, so I thought it would be scary going late at night.”
To show this much kindness between friends. Now that I looked at him, Choi Jihwan was really a stand-up guy.
“……You’re really kind.”
Could someone who kissed a teacher in high school really be this kind? If I explained about Choi Jihwan to Yoo Jeongyeon, he’d definitely think he was cool and want to become friends with him.
Just past midnight, the residential alley leading to my house was surrounded on all sides by houses with their lights off. Choi Jihwan said it seemed scary, but actually, because it was a neighborhood with good public safety, even the streetlights were bright, and I didn’t feel eerie at all.
“……So, about what I asked earlier.”
“Hm?”
Choi Jihwan suddenly stopped walking under one of the streetlights lined up in a row.
“Actually, it was with one omega, so I don’t know it super well.”
“……”
“Earlier, you seemed really curious about it.”
It was back to the topic from before. My eyes sparkled with interest.
“Right, I’m actually really curious. I’ve never dated anyone before.”
“I could tell.”
My mom and dad are both betas, but hyung-nim’s aunt and uncle were an alpha-omega couple.
Both households represented the most common patterns, but not all traits people only date or meet opposite traits. Since there are far more non-traits people than traits people, these days romance between betas and traits people was incredibly common too.
So even though Choi Jihwan said he’d had sex, I didn’t think he could answer all my questions.
But he’d done it with an omega. Even though he was the same age as me, he’d stepped into the adult world much earlier than I had.
“Then have you done a pheromone shower too? I heard that feels really good.”
After stopping briefly, we started walking again and continued our conversation. Maybe it was the alcohol buzz, and since there was no one around to hear our conversation, we could talk even more openly.
“What, don’t you know anything?”
Choi Jihwan, who chuckled, was speaking as if he’d never been embarrassed at all. He seemed to understand that all my questions were pure curiosity without any ulterior motive. Because Choi Jihwan was a friend, not an alpha, I could ask him even more comfortably.
“A pheromone shower feels much more relaxing than sex. You don’t need to undress or go through those procedures.”
“I see……”
“That’s why they say alphas should date omegas. It satisfies a different kind of desire, but you can’t do this kind of thing with betas.”
Satisfies a different kind of desire……
How nice would it be if hyung-nim gave me a pheromone shower? Of course, that would never happen.
Having tried drinking today, no matter how bitter life was, soju didn’t taste sweet. But for some reason, right now my mouth felt even more bitter than when I’d drunk the soju.
“You know, that omega was the teacher, right?”
Somehow Choi Jihwan’s expression looked bitter. Maybe the expression I’d made just now thinking about hyung-nim looked like that.
“Yeah, that’s right.”
“What happened with the teacher? Did anyone find out?”
“The teacher transferred to another school before we got caught.”
Having lived most of my life with an unrequited love for hyung-nim, I could recognize the familiar emotion that appeared on Choi Jihwan’s face. I didn’t know jack shit about dating or sex, but at least in the field of unrequited love, I was practically an expert.
“Because I left a kiss mark and made her angry.”
“A kiss mark?”
At my voice, Choi Jihwan nodded. And I could immediately tell his expression was becoming strange.
What was that?
“……Don’t tell me you don’t know this either?”
Embarrassingly, I didn’t know what that was. I felt like I’d vaguely heard of it, but I couldn’t say I knew what it was. I couldn’t understand why leaving one would make someone angry either.
“Ha, wait a second.”
Choi Jihwan suddenly brought his arm to his mouth, and after a moment, showed me his arm.
“Huh? How did you do that?”
There was a mark stained dark red like a bruise.
“You suck the skin with your lips. Then it becomes like this.”
“Wow, I see……”
“You seemed innocent, but you’re even more so than I thought.”
Just as alphas mark their omegas with their pheromones, was this physically leaving their own mark?
Unlike pheromones, you couldn’t tell who the subject was, but it seemed to sufficiently convey the intention that there was someone you could leave such marks on.
“I only studied until I came to university. So this is really fascinating to me.”
“If you have anything else you’re curious about, ask me.”
“Is that okay?”
When my eyes lit up, Choi Jihwan laughed as if bewildered.
“Just what are you planning to ask?”
Actually, there was something I was really curious about. It was my biggest interest lately.
“What does kissing feel like? I’m really curious about that.”
“Pfft!”
Choi Jihwan burst out laughing and barely held it back.
“Why are you talking so fast? You really were curious, huh.”
“Was it too obvious……?”
I suddenly felt embarrassed and grinned sheepishly.
I was so curious about the topic that words came out fast without me realizing it.
Somehow, even though my tongue had been twisted and terrible earlier, now my pronunciation was clear. Even though my vision was still spinning.
“I wondered what you’d ask. So that’s all?”
“Yeah, I’ve actually been practicing because I want to do well.”
“……Practicing? How?”
“Just, watching dramas, and with jelly……”
“What, jelly? This is crazy.”
While talking with Choi Jihwan, before I knew it, I could see my house in the distance. Seeing the not-too-distant goal made me feel both glad and eager to quickly lie down on my soft bed and rest. Honestly, I didn’t even know what state of mind I’d been walking in until now.
I should ask what kissing is like again when I’m more clear-headed next time…….
“Then want to try it with me?”
My head, which had been looking at the house, naturally turned toward Choi Jihwan.
“……What?”
Come to think of it, had he gotten pretty drunk too? We’d each drunk about two bottles of soju earlier, so Choi Jihwan seemed to be quite drunk too. I grinned.
“You’re drunk, right? What are friends doing.”
“You said you were curious what it feels like, right? For things like that, actually doing it is the most accurate.”
Choi Jihwan shrugged his shoulders as if this was obvious. Surprised, I stared at him for a moment.
Me kissing someone other than Jeongwoo hyung-nim? An instinctive sense of rejection immediately arose.
“Still…… that’s a bit much.”
“Honestly, it’s better than practicing with jelly. You’re not even a kid, what is that?”
Well, he had a point there. Choi Jihwan was even looking at me like I was some pitiful guy now.
Even Yoo Jeongyeon had kissed someone.
Come to think of it, he hadn’t done it with someone he loved either. Maybe kissing wasn’t as special as I imagined, unlike my fantasies.
Thinking about it, there was another reason why it wasn’t bad.
If I kissed someone else just once, I could imagine kissing hyung-nim more concretely too.
Wouldn’t trying it once with a person be more certain than practicing endlessly with jelly?
Thinking realistically, I’d never get to kiss hyung-nim before I died anyway…….
“Then should we?”
Thinking that way again, his proposal seemed like a really good idea.
I nodded, then took a step closer to him. He closed his eyes as if telling me to kiss him.
My height wasn’t short by any means, but as an alpha, Choi Jihwan was a good hand-span taller than me. So I placed my hands on his shoulders and stood on tiptoe.
I hesitated for a moment, looking at his face. I closed my eyes too, thinking of hyung-nim. Around that time, my vision was gradually becoming brighter.
……So this was a kiss? I’d heard that when you fall in love at first sight, bells ring in your ears. Like that kind of effect, does the world brighten when you have your first kiss?
Even so, this was happening before our lips even touched—a bit hesitant, I squeezed my eyes shut.
And it was the moment I was about to press my lips to his.
HONK—!
An ear-splittingly loud sound rang out. Startled and jumping, I immediately snapped my eyes open.
And over Choi Jihwan’s shoulder, I could recognize the source of the bright light that had been piercing my eyes all along.
The moment I saw the familiar car emitting headlight beams, I thought “no way,” and—
“H-hyung-nim……!”
When my eyes met with Jeongwoo hyung-nim gripping the steering wheel beyond the car window, my heart stopped.
