1―10. Running Away
These days, watching hyung made his heart even more troubled.
‘No matter how I look at it, it doesn’t seem like just fan heart?’
At the remark that he liked not only his athlete appearance but also his daily life, his head started to get more complicated.
‘Could it be that hyung…’
Maybe he just hasn’t even thought about the concept of dating itself? So he hasn’t even realized it. Since he was someone who only studied and worked all the time, it was a sufficiently plausible theory.
‘Or what if hyung also wants it but hasn’t said anything because he’s worried I’d dislike it?’
Looking at how he hadn’t brought up that stupid photo from before because he was worried Jeong Minha would dislike it, this also seemed possible.
‘Ah, this is really difficult. Hyung’s heart is harder than any major exam. He said to ask about any difficult problems, but I can’t ask him about this…’
Jeong Minha quietly rolled his pen while half-listening to the lecture at school.
‘It would have been easier if hyung disliked me. Rather, because he treats me too well… What if I reveal my feelings here and things go wrong? It’s good to just stay like this now anyway…’
In fact, this relationship was one that maintained itself quite well as long as Jeong Minha didn’t do anything more. Honestly, even now, to others’ eyes, it was suspicious enough to wonder if they weren’t dating.
“…”
However, Jeong Minha couldn’t endure it. Worrying for a long time wasn’t suited to his disposition from before. If he liked something, he liked it; if he disliked it, he disliked it. His expression of likes and dislikes was clear. He wanted to try everything he wanted. He had lived saying everything he wanted to say.
If it were up to his heart, he wanted to ask Seo Sihan right now what kind of feelings he had. However, as someone who was strong against the strong and weak against the weak, Jeong Minha didn’t have the courage to burden such a kind person.
Then he had no choice but to test the waters as naturally as possible.
‘Last time I was drunk and only created an embarrassing dark history, so this time I need to ask in a roundabout way so hyung won’t be flustered.’
Having made up his mind, Jeong Minha only pretended to listen to the lecture content and earnestly thought about what to say to Seo Sihan.
* * *
“Hyung, are you going to get married?”
“…Huh?”
After work, while eating dinner together, Jeong Minha threw out a question.
Because it was such an out-of-the-blue topic, Seo Sihan was momentarily flustered. Is he imitating drama lines again right now? However, Jeong Minha’s expression looked similar to usual.
Seo Sihan pondered realistically before answering.
“Uh… Probably?”
At that one word, Jeong Minha swallowed his rice all at once, opened his eyes wide, and asked.
“With who?!”
Why is he suddenly curious about this? Still, thinking about it, it hadn’t been just a day or two since Jeong Minha asked out-of-the-blue questions. So Seo Sihan also answered normally again.
“I don’t really know yet but… Won’t I do it with the person my family decides on?”
“…”
“Why…?”
“…It’s nothing.”
Jeong Minha, who had been listening with shining eyes just a moment ago, suddenly looked listless. He quietly ate the remaining rice carelessly, then cleared his bowl first and got up.
“I’m sleepy so I’ll go in first… Sleep well too, hyung.”
“Huh? Uh… Sleep well too, Minha…”
“Yes…”
The current time was 7 PM. Not knowing if he was sulking or really sleepy, Seo Sihan could only greet him back.
* * *
For three days after that, Jeong Minha’s condition was strange.
He wasn’t usually a very lively personality either, but he looked especially more listless. Worried that he might be sick, Seo Sihan asked Jeong Minha if something was wrong, but the answer that came back each time was the same.
“I’m fine.”
It was his usual expressionless face, but the frequency of conversation noticeably decreased. Jeong Minha didn’t come out of his room much.
And on the fourth day, something finally happened.
“…”
Seo Sihan blankly stared only at the message window at the bottom of his monitor at the office. Normally, Jeong Minha would contact him first saying he was bored, or when Seo Sihan contacted him, he would reply right away.
Minha-ya, did you eat? 13:46
You finish at 5:30 today, right? I’ll pick you up later 14:05
Minha-ya, are you really okay? 16:20
For the first time since living together, all his messages were ignored. Could he really be sick somewhere? Is something wrong? Seo Sihan, who couldn’t focus on work at all, called Jeong Minha.
―The call cannot be connected and will be transferred to voicemail after the beep…
Even though it should definitely be break time, he didn’t answer the phone. Looking at how it kept ringing and then went off, it wasn’t like the battery had died either.
What if he’s really sick somewhere and suddenly collapsed? Seo Sihan, who started getting anxious, hurriedly opened the location tracking app.
It was something he had set up just in case when he bought Jeong Minha the latest phone before. He kept it secret because he worried Jeong Minha would dislike it if he told him, but he had never used it until now. Well, until now, he had always been active within the expected range.
Maybe he just had it on silent and didn’t see it, or maybe he finished early today and went home to sleep… Thinking of the most positive possibilities, he looked for the movement route that appeared on the screen.
“…?”
However, what appeared on the screen was an unexpected range. Suddenly, some Han River Park address came up.
And it wasn’t the Han River near their house but quite a far place. It definitely seemed impossible to get there on foot. When did he go there? Looking at the detailed records, he could see that he had taken the subway from 3 PM.
‘Did he go out to play with friends? But why isn’t he answering the phone? Come to think of it, I haven’t received any card notifications all day either… What money did he use to get around? Why on earth?’
Seo Sihan gradually fell into serious contemplation, then soon came up with one hypothesis.
‘The fact that he was listless for several days wasn’t because he was sick, and looking at how he silently went far away like this now…’
…Running away?
* * *
Looking at the scenery where the sunset was already setting, Jeong Minha downed a can of beer in one shot.
“Hah…”
Jeong Minha, sitting on the stairs in front of the Han River wearing just a thin long sleeve shirt and drinking beer, looked indifferent on the outside, but inside he was crying out like the protagonist of a tragic romance.
‘I really hate hyung…!’
While crying only in his heart, he looked at the surrounding scenery pitifully. There were only couples everywhere.
‘Ah… I chose the wrong place.’
Jeong Minha, who had no money, didn’t really have anywhere to go. With this mindset, going to a friend’s house was embarrassing, and even if he tried to kill time at a PC room, the money was precious. Because he wasn’t good at computer games. If he went, it would only make him more irritated. Still, he hated going home even more, so this was as far away as he could come.
Four days ago, after hearing Seo Sihan’s answer, Jeong Minha completely declared he was giving up on his one-sided love. So for several days, he didn’t even talk to him. Still, thinking he should at least earn his keep for meals, he just trained hard alone.
However, shooting was a sport that was only possible with a calm mind. Jeong Minha, who was on the verge of death from distress, was shocked by his nonsensical score and returned to his room.
And this morning, he reached a point where he couldn’t stand his frustrated heart anymore. While attending class at school, when he thought about meeting Seo Sihan again and going home, he didn’t feel like it.
‘I need to at least give myself time to give up…’
In the end, he skipped afternoon classes and ran away as far as possible. He ignored messages too. He felt sorry but also felt resentful. If hyung says he likes me, why does he make me suffer? Ah… But this isn’t hyung’s fault, it’s my problem… An angel and devil were fighting in his head.
He changed his phone to silent and put it in his bag. If he used his card, his location would be discovered, so he put the card in his pocket too. The result of running away with only the very small amount of money remaining was this place.
“It’s not much different from in front of our house…”
Still, it was quite far from Seo Sihan’s house and office. Jeong Minha, who wanted to be physically distant even if his heart couldn’t distance itself, was satisfied with this in its own way.
5:30 PM. Originally, it would have been time for Seo Sihan to pick him up. What is hyung doing around now? Will he worry that I’m not checking messages? While knowing he was being childish, his heart was too frustrated. Above all, Seo Sihan’s answer didn’t sit well with him.
