“Ah… my stomach hurts.”
I came into the room and collapsed straight onto the bed, burying my face in the pillow and lying still for a while. My stomach was cramping so badly that I don’t even know how I made it up to my room.
I was fine after returning from Cha Juheon’s company. I felt embarrassed and ashamed about causing such a scene at the office, but thanks to Cha Juheon’s consideration, I was able to settle my uncomfortable feelings.
I’d never gotten into an argument like that with anyone before, so what happened earlier was quite shocking. And I felt sorry for Cha Juheon, who must have been bothered by the unnecessary commotion. It was supposed to be a simple task—just deliver the file and leave. But I got caught up in an unexpected dispute. I was sorry that my inexperienced response had made Cha Juheon get involved.
Fortunately, Cha Juheon took my side, but how uncomfortable must he have felt dealing with his own employee? On the other hand, it was comforting to know that his actions were for my sake. I was also grateful that he kept holding my hand and looking after me.
Even though the meeting and all his other schedules got pushed back because of that incident, Cha Juheon didn’t mind. He only cared about my feelings, and I was truly grateful for that. He didn’t blame me for what happened and comforted me, so I felt relieved and made it home safely.
So the fact that my stomach is cramping and hurting now has nothing to do with what happened earlier. My condition became like this because another uncomfortable situation suddenly arose even before the lingering relief could fade. This time it was an extremely personal matter that even Cha Juheon couldn’t help with. I got an email from Kang Gyuho.
I was doing what I always do—washing up with warm water, eating the snacks the housekeeper gave me, and sitting on the sofa looking at my laptop. I had something to check in my email, so I opened my inbox, and there was an unexpected email waiting for me. I was so shocked when I saw it that I don’t even remember if I shut down my laptop properly or not.
I thought there’d be no way for him to contact me since I changed my phone number, but to think he’d send an email… The moment I checked the email with an uneasy feeling, disgust washed over me as expected. After that, I felt pain in my stomach, so I hurried up to my room and lay down.
“Why is he suddenly doing this after years of radio silence?”
I don’t know how he manages to get under my skin like this, but this is definitely because of Gyumin hyung. He must have heard about me from hyung. This is really annoying. Of all times, to run into hyung then… If it hadn’t been for that meeting, I wouldn’t have received this unpleasant contact. I didn’t welcome the cracks appearing in my daily life due to an unpleasant reunion.
“I really hate this…”
I really hate them for making me feel shabby and lowering my self-esteem. I hated how they tried to put me down and look down on me. For a time, I was squeezed in between them, going hungry many days while reading the room. The days when I had to stay outside just to live quietly left scars that remain intact.
The miserable memories of sitting on the playground swing in the cold and heat, just waiting for time to pass, still hurt a lot. I endured somehow, doing my best to survive.
Back then, circumstances were difficult and I was too young to know how to cope. I should have at least been confident since I was going to be hated anyway. My intimidated appearance made me look easy, so I must have seemed pathetic from beginning to end. That’s why he’s contacting me so casually like this even now…
Our ending must not have mattered at all to Kang Gyuho. That’s why he thought to ask about my well-being. He’s coming to Korea soon, so let’s meet? This goes beyond shameless—it’s almost like amnesia. At this point, I really want to meet him once and ask. What exactly is his reason for doing this, what’s his scheme… when he deliberately ignored me and left.
I was worried that the stress from seeing the email might affect Kkomul. So I came up to my room and lay down for now… but even lying down, my complicated thoughts didn’t decrease—instead, more kept coming to mind and it was driving me crazy. I just need to not care about it, but that’s not as easy as it sounds either. It’s so irritating. Like a sensitive wound on a fingertip.
“Sigh… Kkomul, I’m sorry. I need to keep my mind at ease, and I’ll try harder. But I want to smell the Executive Director’s pheromones—I wish he’d come home soon. I think that would calm me down.”
Cha Juheon’s pheromones are like painkillers to me. Right now, more than anything else, his pheromones seem like they would help me.
***
Huh? What time is it? I bolted upright in bed, startled because I didn’t know how long I’d slept. My physical condition was fine for now. My stomach wasn’t cramping anymore and my head didn’t hurt either. I guess resting for a bit made me feel better. The room was now filled with Christmas decorations light pouring in from outside the window. It meant evening had already arrived. Oh no, what should I do?
“The Executive Director must be home! I should have greeted him.”
Lately, I’ve been waiting for Cha Juheon to arrive and always welcoming him at the door. It’s the most important part of my daily routine, so I naturally planned to do so today too, but I missed the timing because I was sleeping. I hurried down to the first-floor living room, where the lights were on as expected.
Cha Juheon sat there like a painting, absorbed in his work. I felt happy for no reason and sorry for not greeting him, so I quickly went downstairs. Cha Juheon, sensing my presence, raised his head, and upon confirming it was me, he put down the documents he was looking at.
“Eunwoo-ssi. Come down carefully.”
“Executive Director, you’re home? I accidentally fell asleep…”
Cha Juheon looked carefully at me as I sat down next to him with an awkward greeting. Probably because of what happened today and the fact that I was sleeping, he seemed to be checking if there was anything wrong with me. His gaze was so intense and persistent that it was embarrassing, and I unconsciously avoided his eyes and turned my head.
“I accidentally fell asleep, so I didn’t even greet you. Have you had dinner?”
“Why would greeting me be important? It’s fine. I heard from the housekeeper. That you fell asleep… You must have been tired since a lot happened today. Ah, wait a moment. I’ll make you some tea.”
“I-it’s okay…”
Cha Juheon, who had been looking at me, went to the kitchen to prepare the tea I always drink. I could have made it myself, but for some reason I didn’t know what to do, so I just watched the spot where he’d gone and sat back down on the sofa. On the table in front of the sofa, the laptop I’d been using was closed and organized.
But that’s strange? Did I organize that before going upstairs? I don’t think I even closed the email window…? Just as I was about to touch the laptop, Cha Juheon returned with a savory aroma.
“This is the tea you always drink, right?”
“Yes, that’s right. Thank you.”
I quickly received the cup he offered and took a sip of tea. The savory, warm aroma filled my mouth and my mood improved considerably. Yes, this is the taste. I was sipping a few more times when I felt his gaze on me burning hot.
What is it…? He’s staring at me strangely today? I said I was fine, but is he still bothered by what happened at the office? To ease the awkwardness, I threw out something trivial to him.
“Executive Director, is your hand okay?”
“My hand? What hand?”
“You held my hand at the office earlier… so your mood…”
Wasn’t it unpleasant? I couldn’t bring myself to say those words out loud. I couldn’t say whether he felt disgusted because of me. I have my pride too. He was the one who grabbed my hand first and wouldn’t let go.
“That one’s fine, but the other hand—I washed and disinfected it all day, so it’s okay now.”
“The other hand? Ah… that hand?”
He must be talking about the hand that grabbed that man’s shoulder in anger. He washed and disinfected it all day—I could clearly picture him working hard all day, and I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Thanks to that, I thought my hand would get chapped though.”
Cha Juheon waves his hand and lifts the corners of his mouth. It was unexpected. He can even joke like that? I discovered a smile on Cha Juheon’s face that I unexpectedly wanted to keep seeing, and my heart raced.
“I heard you suddenly went to your room and fell asleep while working in the living room, so I was worried. You must have been tired after such an ordeal. And with a baby in your belly… Are you really sure you don’t need to go to the hospital? You can tell me anything.”
Anything? Really anything at all? Even though I knew that wasn’t what Cha Juheon meant, was it because I was struggling emotionally? Or was it because I saw how Cha Juheon readily took my side today—they say when a person’s heart weakens, they want to rely on someone, and today I strangely wanted to lean on him.
“The hospital is fine. Right now, I think the Executive Director’s pheromones would be enough. To me, the Executive Director’s pheromones are like a cure-all. Even when my body feels a bit uncomfortable or my mind is anxious, if I just smell the Executive Director’s pheromones, I quickly feel stable…”
Suddenly, his pheromones, which had been subtly wafting, grew stronger. Strong enough that “exploded” would be the right expression. They spread out so fast and strong that even I, who had requested the pheromones, was startled. Shocked by the alpha pheromones that filled the surroundings in an instant, I looked at Cha Juheon with wide eyes. Cha Juheon’s gaze was as intense as his spreading pheromone scent, aimed precisely at me.
“Something must have happened to you for you to request my pheromones like this, right?”
“What? No, it’s not like that right now…”
Strangely, Cha Juheon acted as if he knew something had happened to me. But I couldn’t ask more about that. Whether it was because Cha Juheon’s pheromones were particularly strong, my body was getting hot to an abnormal degree. As my body heated up, Cha Juheon’s eyes narrowed.
“When I hear that Eunwoo-ssi is uncomfortable somewhere, I worry a lot. Moreover, today I made an unnecessary request that caused Eunwoo-ssi to experience something unpleasant, and also you seem physically uncomfortable for some reason…”
Through Cha Juheon’s suffocating pheromones, a sweet scent began to spread along with them. It was none other than the scent of my pheromones. Perhaps stimulated by Cha Juheon’s pheromones, I too was unable to control my pheromones. In an instant, the cool grass scent and sweet green grape scent mixed and spread through the living room.
“Honestly, today I didn’t want any other alpha—no, anyone at all, not just alphas—to touch your body, Eunwoo-ssi. And I wish you wouldn’t hide anything from me either.”
“Hide? I’m not hiding anything…”
I was nearly suffocating from Cha Juheon’s pheromones. Intoxicated by the pheromones, I couldn’t even tell what tone I was using to answer him. But why can’t this person control his pheromones? I couldn’t come to my senses from the strong scent that was different from usual.
It seemed he was also losing his mind, intoxicated by the mixed pheromone scents. Cha Juheon’s hand kept touching my hair, and I was letting him even though I knew it. So pheromones are this scary. Cha Juheon caressed my hair very carefully, cautiously, extremely cautiously with gentle hands. I didn’t want to stop those hands reaching toward me.
“It’s okay to open up to me a little.”
My head was getting more and more hazy, and I couldn’t understand what he wanted me to open up about. Right now, I only wanted to feel Cha Juheon’s touch and his pheromones. Before I knew it, Cha Juheon’s fingers that had been touching my hair reached my ear. At the touch gently rubbing my earlobe, I silently stared blankly at Cha Juheon. My face was definitely flushed red and heated up just like his.
