“Princess, if you’re up, come eat.”
That polished, bright face smiled at him from right up close. Hee-young let out a long sigh and rubbed at his eyelids. Is this guy insane.
Shin-yul’s large hand came to rest over Hee-young’s as he scrubbed roughly at his face. The moment they touched, a faint, gentle current of Guiding flowed through — like a stream trickling by.
They’d said that once the sensation was awakened, even the slightest contact would make it noticeable — and it really was true. But that large hand, and the sensation of Guiding flowing into him, brought back vivid memories of last night’s intensity, and Hee-young broke out in goosebumps and shoved Shin-yul’s hand away.
And at the end, that…. Hee-young’s face scrunched hard. No wonder it felt uncomfortable. No, but wait — just how big is he? Even through the clothes, that sensation…. Hee-young shook his head rapidly to clear his thoughts and said curtly,
“Hey. Don’t touch me without asking.”
“Are you in a bad mood? Is it because you’re still sleepy?”
“Would I be in a good mood? Use your head for once.”
“I’m always thinking about my princess though?”
Even in the face of Hee-young’s cold response, Shin-yul just smiled like nothing was wrong. Even Hee-young, who had been firing off in temper, lost the will to fight at Shin-yul’s deflating answer and buried his face in the pillow. A muffled Argh! rang out, swallowed by the pile of cotton. Screaming into it helped, at least a little. Yeah. What’s the point of being angry about what’s already done.
“What’s for breakfast.”
“Spicy pork stir-fry. Princess only ever eats spicy pork, pork cutlet, or rice soup.”
“A person has to eat proper food. If you make that weird — what was it — trumba? Whatever that pasta was, I’ll kill you.”
“Yes, ajeossi.”
Listening to that obedient answer, Hee-young wobbled his way upright. It can’t be normal to be passing out this often. Shin-yul scooped him up as he swayed and carried him all the way to the dining table himself — and cradled in those arms, Hee-young thought blankly.
After sitting him down in the chair and pressing a spoon into his small hand, Shin-yul finally went to take his own seat. Hee-young chewed his food slowly and muttered.
“Should I go back to the hospital….”
“Why? Does something hurt?”
“Is it normal for a person to keep blacking out like this?”
“Ah, it’s normal for Guides and Espers to have weakened bodies for about a month after Manifestation. Think of it as post-Manifestation side effects. Most people don’t collapse the way you do, but since you have a frail body, it can happen. You’ll get better soon.”
“You know my body better than I do?”
Hee-young said with a crooked smile. No matter how coldly he reacted or how much he slouched and sniped, Shin-yul seemed completely unaffected — he piled as much spicy pork as he could onto Hee-young’s white rice and said casually,
“Of course I know, since you’re my princess. Eat your vegetables too. Want me to wrap some for you?”
“Wrap this. If there’s anything else you haven’t told me, say it now.”
“Hmm…. I don’t think so. But don’t worry about it, princess.”
As if I’d just leave something bad happen to my princess. The playfully added words made Hee-young involuntarily concede, well, that’s true.
From what he’d gathered, it seemed he was the only one who could Guide Shin-yul — it didn’t seem like he’d just let him keel over and die that easily. Hee-young stared at Shin-yul quietly and let out a complicated sigh.
What’s going to happen to him. When I go back.
Well, ideally this Hee-young person or whatever would just stay his Guide permanently…. But what if Guiding or whatever it is depends on the mind or the soul? What if I go back to my original world and this body is left empty and dies?
Hee-young had a tendency to form attachments to people he considered his own — and he felt a small, pathetic twinge of sympathy for Shin-yul, who followed him so faithfully. But his own situation was dire enough, so he quickly wiped away any concern for Shin-yul and turned his thoughts to how he might get back to his original world. After all, he couldn’t very well spend the rest of his days glued to a man in a world where monsters popped out of nowhere and everything was completely unhinged. And judging by the way Shin-yul kissed without a second’s hesitation, it was painfully obvious that his lips were never going to be safe again going forward.
Actually, speaking of kissing.
“Hey, about yesterday—”
“Here, open up. I wrapped it small to fit your mouth. You really do have the tiniest mouth, princess. So cute.”
A small ssam wrap floated up through the air and landed neatly in his mouth before he could react — and at the teasing remark that followed, Hee-young’s face twisted as he chewed. His wretched little mouth really was that small, and it took an age just to chew through the wrap — Hee-young finally managed to swallow and said, trembling with irritation,
“You little — listen when someone’s talking to you.”
“Hm? I always listen to Hee-young.”
“A good listener would not have come at me like that last night. What’s wrong with you, huh?”
“Honestly, that was you seducing me. Rolling your eyes all sultry, sucking on my fingers, pouring Guiding all over me. I had a hard time holding back last night too. Give me some credit.”
“You didn’t hold back!”
“I did.”
Is this really a conversation for the breakfast table? But Hee-young’s indignation refused to settle. He had braced himself mentally before Shin-yul came back — but not for the kissing. And on top of that, whatever had happened to all his years of experience — he’d lost control to some barely-grown kid, gotten swept up in an unfamiliar sensation, and ended up gasping and collapsing. The thought of it made him furious and humiliated. It felt like he’d underestimated Shin-yul — who’d seemed almost pitifully gentle — and gotten completely blindsided. His pride stung. But Hee-young reminded himself internally, still, I’m the adult here, slowly steadied his breathing, and answered.
“Listen, Shin-yul. Let me say something as the adult here….”
“Want another wrap?”
“No garlic. And don’t keep interrupting when an adult is speaking.”
“Yes, ajeossi.”
Watching Shin-yul wrap it up neatly and efficiently, Hee-young spoke calmly.
“I get it now, okay? Your situation, this insane world — I understand. I want to help you too. I mean, I’m your Guide and all. Are you listening?”
“Yeah.”
“Right. But hey — kissing, and touching someone’s body — that kind of thing, you know you’re supposed to get the other person’s consent first, right? Or is that just common sense to me alone?”
“It’s not just you. But I did ask yesterday.”
“You asked and then immediately shoved your lips on me — is that asking? Is it?”
This time Shin-yul didn’t use his ability — he stretched his long arm out across the table and held the wrap out in front of Hee-young’s face, and answered.
“So from now on, I’ll get an answer from you before I kiss you?”
“Why are you already thinking about kissing again!”
“But you said you’d help me…. If you hadn’t kissed me yesterday, something bad would’ve happened to me.”
Shin-yul dropped the corners of his eyes into a pitiful expression — and lightly bumped the small wrap against Hee-young’s lips.
Hee-young accepted the wrap with a dart of his tongue and sat with his thoughts. Is that right? It was that serious? I mean, he did look pretty rough yesterday. But then does that mean he can just kiss me whenever he feels like it? He asks — can I — and I say yes — and then we kiss? No, wait…. It’s not kissing, it’s Guiding. No, but it is kissing. The more he thought about it, the more he felt his own brain turning to mush. In practice, actually experiencing Guiding himself gave him the strong sense that it was less like kissing and more like a medical procedure — like breathing your own inner energy into the other person.
Ah, is this why everyone in this world has completely abandoned normal standards? Hee-young stared blankly. Without even noticing, his resistance to the idea of kissing had already quietly dissolved — and he was turning the matter over in his head under the default assumption that kissing Shin-yul would simply continue to happen. He remained entirely unaware of this shift, scratched his head, and finally went, Ah, forget it, with a snap of irritation.
Whatever. I’ve already lost these lips once, what’s once more or twice. Lips — consider them gone. Sorry to whoever this body actually belongs to, but hey — a person can’t always do only what they want. Lost my first kiss when I was still in a school uniform anyway. At least he’s got a decent face. If that’s not the case, I’m truly sorry.
“Hmm…. Only when Guiding requires it.”
“Kissing is always Guiding. Princess.”
“No — when you need Guiding, you ask me, and if I allow it—”
“I need it right now…. Can we do it now?”
At Shin-yul’s question, Hee-young quietly looked down at his watch. Guiding level: 82%.
“Does that look okay to you?”
“I’ll make it feel good. You were dying from how good it felt yesterday, princess.”
“Are you out of your mind?”
***
Shin-yul, who up until now had been stuck to Hee-young’s side like an unemployed man with nowhere to be, seemed to have decided — using last night as a turning point — to fully return to duty. The moment breakfast was finished, he was briskly changing into his Esper uniform. As Hee-young listened to the explanation that if you took more than three weeks off work you were automatically placed on leave and had to come back in full uniform to formally report your return, he sneered, how dramatic…. what is this, the military?
Shin-yul had always gone around in plain t-shirts with his hair hanging loose and messy — but now, standing in a crisp formal uniform with his hair neatly swept back, Hee-young was rolling around on the bed patting his full stomach when he accidentally caught sight of that handsome face and went, oh, in spite of himself.
This guy, face-wise alone, he really is clean-cut and good-looking.
Hee-young sat up from the bed and walked over to Shin-yul. He stood on his tiptoes and straightened the slightly flipped collar at the back of his neck, then smoothed his hands from the shoulders down along the back and waist, pressing and brushing out the lines of the jacket with a few firm pats.
“Turn around. Isn’t this a bit small on you?”
“Hmm… maybe? It’s been a few years since I had it fitted.”
“Get a new one made if you can. Fitted properly. If you walk around looking sloppy, people will see you as sloppy. Once someone looks down on you, crossing the line becomes easy — and a line that’s been crossed once loses its boundary. People, no matter how decent they seem, all have a calculating side — they instinctively try to measure the person in front of them.”
Well, from what I’ve seen, I doubt there’s anyone who’d dare look down on you.
Hee-young chattered on, the way people his age often did — mistaking the kind of advice a young person didn’t ask for as wisdom worth sharing.
Shin-yul listened quietly, and his eyes narrowed. Even in those offhand words, there was the weight of lived experience. Can you really say things like this from delusion? For a twenty-one-year-old supposedly lost in his own fantasies, the words ran far too deep.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Don’t brush it off as some old man’s nagging — take it to heart. All that talk about learning through trial and error is nonsense. If someone who’s already fallen and rolled around out there tells you there’s a rock ahead — watch out — and you listen and walk past safely, isn’t that so much better? Even when you listen carefully and dodge everything you can, life still shreds you in ways you never saw coming. Don’t be stubborn about things you could avoid. Be a little smarter about how you live.”
What right do I have to be giving advice like this, Hee-young thought — but some memory surfacing wouldn’t let him help it, and he let out a small laugh. The moment that soft laugh reached his ears, Shin-yul slowly looked down at Hee-young — and his expression gradually cooled.
The pale face grinning and giving his broad back firm pats suddenly seemed, for just a moment, very far away. The round, gentle eyes, the small upturned nose, the lightly flushed cheeks — none of it looked like a grown adult yet. But those distant eyes tracing some long-past memory, the smile that carried a thread of loneliness, the wistfulness held in those hands tapping his back, the voice that sounded measured but carried weight underneath it all — it felt as though Hee-young were sinking into a world Shin-yul would never be able to reach.
Without thinking, Shin-yul grabbed Hee-young’s hand urgently. Hee-young, who had still been patting away at his back, clicked his tongue internally. Damn, caught me patting him. Sharp as ever.
“Ah, what, did that hurt? Hey — I was cheering you on, you know, I—”
“Come with me.”
“Hm?”
“Come to The Center with me.”
“What, I thought I was supposed to rest today. Said you could go on your own.”
Hee-young’s face scrunched. He had been planning to stay home, rest easy, and sort out his plan to get back — and Shin-yul was suddenly insisting they go out together, which threw him off completely.
What’s gotten into him? Was my advice really that moving?
Well, that was touching — in its own way — but Hee-young wanted to spend today alone, resting. No Guiding lessons, no events exploding left and right every other minute, no people treating sheer madness as if it were common sense — surely he could take one day to breathe. Especially if it meant prying this clingy young man off him first.
Hee-young turned away firmly and said, No, — but Shin-yul’s grip tightened on his retreating hand and refused to let go, and so began yet another losing battle of strength.
