On the way back to the villa, carrying the unnecessary antidote I’d received from Nam Heedo’s house. Watching the slowly rising sun, I realized that a new day was starting again.
Every single day faced in another person’s body. Those who haven’t experienced it won’t know how draining it is… Everything felt restless, and I was uncertain about everything.
I felt that way even when I collapsed onto the rocking chair in the villa’s living room.
‘I made the right decision, didn’t I?’
Deciding to make Baek Sahyun a beta. While simultaneously becoming an alpha myself to gain relative superiority. Because this is a world where traits equal power.
But this way, I’d be twisting the original content too much. The positions of the characters had changed, and the roles each one held had completely disappeared.
Now everything would be reorganized into forms I didn’t know… would I be able to adapt well?
“Anyway, I kept fumbling around even when I knew the content.”
Thinking that, I moved the squeaking rocking chair. Baek Sahyun, who had gone straight into the kitchen as soon as we arrived, came out with a cup of tea.
“It’s rosemary tea. It’s supposed to be good for calming nerves.”
The way he introduced it was gentle and demure, but I couldn’t accept that kindness as kindness. The bloody pieces he’d trampled before leaving the villa were still scattered about.
“…Thanks.”
Still, thinking it was better not to refuse than to refuse, I drank the tea, but Baek Sahyun persistently stared at me holding the tea water in my mouth. No, fuck, did you poison it or something?
“Want some?”
Moreover, it seemed Baek Sahyun needed nerve calming more than me, so I held out the teacup. But he shook his head side to side.
“Drink it and get some sleep. Maybe it’s because you stayed up all night, but your dark circles have come down a lot.”
“Who. Me?”
“Then would it be me, Heejae-ya?”
True, Baek Sahyun stayed up all night too but maintained his sleek, well-proportioned face. How could he not even get dark circles? I became troubled again by the protagonist buff.
It would be nice if only his appearance got the buff. But since this world was originally created for Baek Sahyun, it seemed the developments would ultimately flow in a direction for him too.
Preventing that from happening would be something I’d have to consider from now on, though.
“Thanks for making the tea. I’m going in to sleep.”
After sipping until I could see the bottom of the teacup, I said good night greetings in the early morning. It was a greeting completely unsuited to the time, but Baek Sahyun returned the greeting too.
“Okay. Sleep well.”
I’d been worried he might go crazy saying he’d use the same bed as me, but he cleanly let me go. I trudged up the stairs and entered my private room that the butler would have cleaned up nicely.
“Ugh, I’m tired…”
My eyes closed before I could even take off my outdoor clothes. I couldn’t help my eyelids growing heavier.
A deep sleep after a long time, and sweet dreams.
In that day’s dream, Jang Haesu appeared having an intellectually passionate discussion with some reliable-looking man, and Jang Haesu appeared having made lots of friends after entering university.
That kid, when did she say it was comfortable to go around alone and she didn’t cultivate friends, but there she was moving around in a noisy group just fine. Seeing that, my heart swelled anew and my nose stung.
Thank goodness. Really, thank goodness.
Sometimes, I thought it would be nice if Haesu appeared in my dreams like this. I was curious about what kind of guy she’d date and marry beyond her school life.
Ah, even if I’m called a sister complex, I have nothing to say. Jang Haesu, who must have become truly alone now that I’ve left too. Our Jang Haesu…, I really wanted to see her build a stable family and feel comfortable within it.
“…This is crazy. Look at this wet pillow.”
I woke from sleep as smoothly as I’d fallen asleep, and looked down absurdly at the pillow soaked with tears. When I wiped my eyes, tears still came out thickly.
Still, my mood wasn’t too unpleasant.
“I wonder if Jang Haesu is eating well. I hope she’s not starving herself dieting or anything.”
Because I was happy just to have been able to see Jang Haesu after so long. So I earnestly hoped once more that I could often have dreams like this.
❖ ❖ ❖
After the contract was established, Baek Sahyun treated me exceptionally favorably. Bringing out meals at every mealtime must have been quite troublesome, but he completed cooking efficiently without help from the household employees.
When I mentioned a menu I wanted to eat, he brought it with considerable quality—he was like a human vending machine.
“Heejae-ya. Want to go out shopping today?”
Everything was tolerable except for these date requests thrown at me from time to time. Date requests were, goddammit, something I had to okay because there was no way to particularly refuse them.
After going to see Nam Heedo, we’d been repeating shopping, movies, and walking courses day and night. Because Baek Sahyun drove, Baek Sahyun paid, and Baek Sahyun led, I felt guilty enough. It felt like being a contestant on a dating variety show shamelessly shifting everything onto someone else.
I asked while picking through the braised cutlassfish Baek Sahyun had laid out on the long dining table with my chopsticks.
“Shopping… sure, sounds good. But how long are we staying here?”
I was curious if he was planning to stick around here forever. Baek Sahyun smiled while pushing toward me a plate where he’d already removed all the fish flesh.
“Are you bored?”
“Huh? Uh, actually that too. It’s nice to be on vacation, but Seoul is nice and bustling.”
This place was too quiet and peaceful. So thoughts of being inside the world of a novel kept surging up endlessly. That feeling was really shitty, so if I could leave, I wanted to leave this place as quickly as possible.
“Wow.”
Taking a bite of the braised cutlassfish Baek Sahyun had deboned, my eyes nearly popped out. The seasoning was so delicious, as if there was some special secret recipe passed down through generations. Appropriately spicy and salty, when I put it on white rice, my chopsticks naturally moved faster.
Baek Sahyun said gently:
“We’re going up tomorrow, so don’t worry about that. Um, eat your rice a bit slower. If you get indigestion, I’ll have to prick your finger.”
At that moment, pause—my chopsticks stopped.
Prick my finger? I imagined Baek Sahyun holding a needle and poking someone’s finger…, damn it. It was clearly predictable that he wouldn’t just lightly pierce a hole but would penetrate the finger itself with the needle.
“Right. I’ll eat slowly. …Why aren’t you eating?”
I nagged at Baek Sahyun, who was just nibbling. Even when I lived with Jang Haesu, I played the role of a very strict oppa when it came to meals.
“Dude. Do you know how much of a farmer’s sweat went into a single grain of rice?”
“Yeah. My grandmother does farm work.”
“……”
“Mainly relief crops. Do you like relief crops?”
I did like them, but I had no answer to give back. Baek Sahyun was a champion at making people speechless like this.
“Do you not know what relief crops are?”
When he asked with a slightly furrowed brow, I burst out:
“It means things like potatoes, sweet potatoes, and corn. I go to the market a lot too, so I know?”
“Haha. Why did you go to the market a lot?”
“To buy side dishes to make for Jang Hae…”
As I was babbling, I shut my mouth with a gasp and looked at Baek Sahyun’s expression. As expected, although he was smiling, he was staring at me intently, not looking pleased at all. His raised lips contrasted with eyes that weren’t curved at all.
When you think of Baek Sahyun, you think of eye smiles; when you think of eye smiles, you think of Baek Sahyun.
I sighed and said:
“Dude. She’s my younger sister, my sister. Don’t act petty about making side dishes for my real sister. I can make them for you too.”
Then Baek Sahyun shot back as if sulking:
“Make me dried squid strips.”
“Sure.”
“Braised black beans too.”
“Say more. Just say all the side dishes you want at this point. I’ll feed you until your stomach bursts so you can never be jealous again about me making side dishes for Haesu.”
“Why do I seem jealous?”
“That’s because you like me…, fuck.”
As soon as I spat it out, regret surged up. I shouldn’t have said that. I felt like I was gradually becoming a gay novel character too, and my vision became distant. Baek Sahyun finally folded his eyes roundly and smiled.
“Right. I’m glad you know.”
He whispered gently as if he was so happy he could die. Watching him, I couldn’t distinguish whether this bastard was acting like this because he really liked me, or because teasing me was fun.
Silently just shoveling rice, an impulse suddenly rose to ask for a favor while the atmosphere was decent.
“Ahem, ahem. Hey, Sahyun-ah?”
When I cleared my throat and called his name, he put a well-cooked potato on top of my rice bowl.
“Yeah, Heejae-ya.”
At some point it seemed like he was trying to call me Jang Woohyun, but the form of address had completely solidified to Nam Heejae. Well, it’s a friend’s name he’s known for over ten years, so it wouldn’t be easy to suddenly change and call me by a different name.
“I have a favor to ask, so can you put down your chopsticks for a moment and talk?”
“Why the chopsticks. Can’t we do it while eating?”
“No, fuck. When you hear it, you might pick up and throw your chopsticks.”
“Mm… there are plenty of chopsticks to throw though.”
After briefly pondering, Baek Sahyun soon nodded. He put down his chopsticks with a clack.
“So what’s the favor?”
