Perhaps noticing my hesitation, Baek Sahyun whispered meaningfully.
“We agreed to try trusting each other.”
I didn’t like his face pretending to smile as if nothing was wrong, but it was also true that my anxiety had lessened. I eventually decided to accept the drink. Surely he couldn’t have pulled any tricks in that brief moment.
It was when I brought my lips to the glass.
“The winning bid was around 200 million, wasn’t it.”
“What was.”
“That whiskey you’re about to drink.”
Kheuk! At Baek Sahyun’s words, the alcohol didn’t even make it down my throat and ended up spraying out. Coughs burst out like crazy.
200 million. Did I hear that correctly?
“Why the fuck are you only saying that now. You crazy bastard.”
My heart races. If what he said is true, it means I was just about to gulp down at least several hundred thousand won. I’m going crazy. I felt sick to my stomach over a cocktail I didn’t even drink.
200 million. A whole 200 million. I calculated the unrealistic amount in my head.
It was an amount that would have sent Jang Haesu to graduate school with a free pass. No, what graduate school. I could give her wedding funds and even get her a house somewhere in the provinces.
If by chance Jang Haesu doesn’t get married…, then it seemed I could solve my own pitiful educational background problem. Isn’t that an amount where most university tuition would be peanuts?
No, wait. What am I thinking, Jang Woohyun. No matter what, university is too extravagant for someone like me.
Baek Sahyun recited softly.
“Chairman Nam would enjoy drinking this level regularly, so why.”
“That’s not the problem.”
Hyungman-ssi’s business is Hyungman-ssi’s business. When I clicked my tongue, Baek Sahyun continued.
“Then what’s the problem? Anyone would think you came from living in a shantytown on the hillside, Heejae-ya.”
Hillside shantytown. Yeah, fuck! I’m from that falling-apart neighborhood, you bastard. Barely suppressing the curses rising to my throat, I muttered quietly.
“Don’t go around talking so carelessly.”
A bottle of whiskey that bastards like Baek Sahyun and Nam Heejae treat as a burden is like the water of life to me and Jang Haesu.
One bottle of whiskey that goes into these guys enjoying barely two hours or so of entertainment. Living a life not even worth that one bottle’s value, I…
Baek Sahyun gently exhaled.
“I don’t know what part made you angry.”
“Forget it. You bastard.”
“I made you a cocktail and all you do is get angry.”
I feel a sense of futility anew. I know there’s no need to feel deprived toward a character in a book who was given the setting of a second-generation chaebol, but still, I couldn’t hide my emptiness.
To think that the result of laboring day and night for over ten years doesn’t even amount to that one bottle of whiskey.
“Ah. Jang Haesu…”
Jang Haesu, who must be living alone with that reality, filled my mind. I’m here enjoying 200 million won whiskey, but Jang Haesu has to struggle to survive on my measly death insurance money.
If I were lying in a hospital bed with breath still in me, the situation would be even more serious. Astronomical hospital bills plus nursing care.
What good is possessing a rich young master’s body when I can’t bring Haesu even a single won?
Damn it. If I’d known it would be like this, I should have taken out more insurance. As regret flooded in uncontrollably, I fearlessly joined the drinking session Baek Sahyun had set up.
❖ ❖ ❖
“Hueeong…, Haesu-ya….”
From some point on, I was sobbing and crying out for Jang Haesu. Baek Sahyun silently watched that pathetic state, then asked ‘Who is Jang Haesu?’
Naturally, I didn’t feel the need to answer. After all, this bastard is a carefree virtual character. There was no meaning in having a conversation at all.
“I’m asking who Jang Haesu is.”
“Fuck, I need to collect scraps to raise tuition money…, and here I am with some gay bastard! Huuk.”
“Nam Heejae.”
“Hueeeo, do I just have to die again…? Is that it…?”
After crying my heart out for a while, I raised myself from my seat. I grabbed the arm of Baek Sahyun, who was looking down with coldly narrowed eyes, forcibly sat him on the sun bed, then poured alcohol until it overflowed the empty liquor glass.
“You bastard. When hyung’s glass is empty, you should fill it. Watch and learn.”
I don’t know where such courage welled up from, but thinking that the person before me was just a fictional character, my fear subsided. Right. This isn’t a real world, so there’s no need to maintain boundaries.
But absurdly, Baek Sahyun poured the drink I’d given him onto the ground with a splash. When I filled it again out of spite, sure enough, the same reaction came back. After repeating the same action about six times, Baek Sahyun opened his mouth.
“Heejae-ya.”
His voice was ominous.
“Even a fucking dog would understand after about three times.”
“……”
“But right now, I’ve asked who Jang Haesu is over ten times.”
At his noticeably colder tone, I instinctively shrank my neck. Even while half out of my mind, I had the intuition that I shouldn’t provoke him.
When I became a bit more docile, Baek Sahyun asked with a satisfied smile.
“Is it a woman or a man?”
Under the fiercely pouring gaze, the back of my neck felt chilly. Then suddenly this thought occurred to me.
If I don’t break this ice-cold atmosphere, I’ll inevitably be subjected to bathroom punishment. I intended to somehow gloss over it, but my tongue moved aggressively contrary to my original intention.
“Wh-what are you gonna do knowing that.”
“……”
“I have no obligation to reveal every detail of my personal information. E-even if you’re a ghost…”
My slurred pronunciation increased my stammering as I tried to pull it together. I worried whether Baek Sahyun would treat me like an idiot again, but fortunately, he was listening seriously.
I threw out one more comment while I was at it.
“If you really want to know, you reveal yours first.”
“What?”
“Your private life. I might consider mutual sharing, but I hate sharing one-sidedly.”
In the embarrassingly awkward silence, Baek Sahyun’s and my gazes clashed tensely. Before long, a deflating laugh came from him.
“Your head’s really not working, Nam Heejae. I’m probably the only person left who’ll listen to your nonsense.”
“What?”
“Who Jang Haesu is, what kind of person you are. That kind of content.”
A gaze full of tenderness scanned various parts of my face.
“Whether you’re really a ghost or not, I’m not particularly interested in that.”
“……”
“Honestly, as long as it’s fun, that’s all that matters.”
“……”
“So go ahead and vent to your heart’s content. You need someone to listen, don’t you?”
Baek Sahyun, who gently patted my shoulder, poured liquor into the empty glass with a splash. Above the swaying glass, it seemed the face of Jang Woohyun, not Nam Heejae, was faintly reflected.
A blurry, dull-looking face.
I dry-washed my face and chuckled. Well, Baek Sahyun’s words were right. There was nowhere that would listen to complaints from a poor person like me.
Goddamn it. In this unrealistic world, Jang Woohyun was someone who didn’t exist from the beginning. But I could sense it. Even if I end up living out my remaining life trapped in Nam Heejae’s body, I would never be able to let go of past memories.
I’d drift on the surface of the novel without fully immersing in my newly gained life.
This obvious fact became unbearably burdensome all over again. So I raised my voice as if venting.
“Why are you even curious about my story?”
“Mm?”
“Why are you curious? Will something change if you know? Will I give you a kiss or something?”
“No one knows that.”
Baek Sahyun’s attitude of trying to coax me with smiling eyes was extremely unpleasant.
“You’re not even that curious, you fox-like bastard, arrogantly keep…, when you’re just made of paper…”
Was it because I was drunk? All kinds of words flowed out. My emotions were uncontrolled.
“Saying things you don’t mean. Is it fun? Is this so fun?”
My eyes reddened and the tip of my nose stung. In the midst of having nowhere to lean on, the only human who says he’ll listen to my story is a crazy bastard with a screw loose.
Letting out an empty laugh, I pressed my eyes firmly with my palms. Sorrow welled up. I tried to restrain the tears falling continuously between my trembling eyelids, but it wasn’t easy.
When I bit my lips tightly in regret, my breathing tangled. Feeling like my panting was getting worse, I slammed my forehead down onto the sun bed.
Thud, thud, thud. Increasing the intensity gradually, I punished myself. If Baek Sahyun hadn’t forcibly held my shoulders, I would have gotten abrasions. He warned.
“Don’t make me angry.”
“Uugh…”
“I said don’t make me angry. I told you I don’t like drunks.”
“Then why did you make me drink…”
“I thought it’d get interesting. But I was wrong. It’s just making my mood filthy.”
Gripping my forearm strongly, Baek Sahyun lifted my chin and let out a deep sigh. His brow was furrowed as if disgusted. Anyone would think I throw drunken fits every single day.
At times like this, just think the drunk is acting up and quietly leave. The fact that leaving me alone is the best strategy—perhaps because he’s still young, he seems completely unaware of it.
It was while I was struggling with tears for a while like that. Baek Sahyun, who had been quiet, suddenly thrust his head toward me. The moment I widened my eyes at the nose that approached abruptly, a soft sensation brushed past my lips.
