# Chapter 45
“Are you hurt?”
It had been a while since I’d seen Wimu’s face in the light. As soon as he got away from Arzel, he hurriedly checked my physical condition. The composure he had shown while subduing his opponent was nowhere to be found. Seeing his sword-holding hand trembling, I suppressed the emotion welling up inside me. Only after confirming with his own eyes that I was unharmed did Wimu seem to relax, dropping his sword and burying his face in his hands.
“Ha… I thought you were hurt.”
“Have you been well?”
He slowly raised his head. His dark eyes fixed on me, clearly revealing the reason for the shadows prominently displayed on his face. His face, struggling to speak, bore scars I hadn’t seen before. Without realizing it, I reached out and traced the deeply etched wound. My expression involuntarily contorted.
“What have you been doing…”
Wimu silently stared at me. My hand moved on its own and discovered another scar. He was a warrior, and as long as he wielded a sword, such wounds would likely never cease. Even knowing this, my heart ached. His gaze, which once promised me safety by mere contact, now wavered aimlessly with vulnerability.
He gently grasped my hand. Wimu’s sturdy hand completely enclosed mine that had been caressing his scar. Wimu spoke his first words in a low voice.
“Run away, Ludin.”
“…What?”
His incomprehensible statement made me exclaim in surprise. Wimu calmly continued.
“I’ll help you. Run away from here.”
I pulled my hand from his grasp. He released me without resistance, appearing undisturbed, as if he had spoken the truth. It was incomprehensible. Though I tried not to think about it, I knew his wish. He had definitely knelt before Kadilen and made a desperate request. It was to save me.
“What are you talking about?”
“If you stay here, we’ll all just try to hold onto you. I did, and so did others…”
He wasn’t wrong. Devan had said he would never let me go, and Jiman had begged me to live for the first time. Kadilen had placed a bead inside me. Everyone gripped me tightly, allowing no concession. Wimu painfully lowered his eyes. His voice quietly settled to the floor.
“If my punishment is to never see you again, then so be it.”
“Why would you…”
I had never wanted him to be punished. I couldn’t say I bore no responsibility for putting Wimu in such a situation. Despite the countless painful things between us, I clearly remembered how Wimu had tried to protect me. Wimu had always cherished me. I believed that had I not pushed him away for my own purposes, he would have always remained my friend. But he spoke with difficulty, unable to hide his pain.
“I felt sorry when you came to the temple broken. The person I knew wasn’t like that.”
“You believed in me. Even when I treated you so badly…”
“No, I didn’t in the moment that mattered. I didn’t even ask you.”
His calm voice was infused with bitter guilt. He stared at me silently for a while. What he was looking at wasn’t the current me. The moment when Wimu betrayed me without asking, the moment when he believed Kadilen’s words about my curse and determined my death. On that day when he quietly left me in brutal violence, Wimu never turned his eyes away from me, as if trying to remember every scene. He was probably looking at that place.
“I’ve thought countless times about why I did it. What clouded my eyes. Perhaps I wanted to be special to you. To be the last person by your side.”
“You were that person.”
Despite my immediate response, Wimu smiled sadly. His faint laugh disappeared in an instant.
“I know you had no intention of relying on me. I was angry that I couldn’t be your person, and so I thought our friendship was over.”
It hurt me too. In the end, everything I had done, comforting myself that it was for Wimu, had returned to him as wounds. Feeling dizzy, I looked at his face. Wimu’s eyes reddened.
“But Ludin…”
He walked toward me slowly. As his waist gradually bent, Wimu’s face came close enough to almost touch me. His heated gaze, filled with tears, looked at me longingly. He extended a trembling hand and grasped my hand hanging in the air. Then he slowly brought it to his chest.
“Is this friendship?”
With his question imbued with tears, I felt his heartbeat. From my hand touching his warm flesh, a strong vibration was endlessly transmitted. Beating loud enough to make my head ache.
I stared at him in confusion. Tears finally fell from Wimu’s eyes. He smiled lightly.
“It hasn’t been long. I haven’t been deceiving you.”
“I am…”
“You don’t need to answer. Just run away without looking back. Before I become greedy again.”
The end of his words trembled weakly. As I stood blankly, unable to think of what to say, Wimu quietly began to explain.
“I’m the one assigned to track Luan. If I don’t report, no one can force you to live.”
“…”
“You can go that comfortably. I’ve prepared a beautiful place. I can make it anywhere you want, but…”
Wimu continued to cry. Unable to hide any of his feelings about accepting my end. From his heaving chest, his heart kept beating rapidly just because he was looking at me. As I looked at him, at a loss for words, I recalled what all these decisions meant.
“Do you know what you’re saying? Kadilen is…”
“I know. It doesn’t matter.”
“What?”
His action directly contradicted Kadilen’s orders. Wimu had devoted his body and life to serve him loyally. The reason Kadilen trusted Wimu so much was that he had never once turned his back on his master.
“It’s what you want.”
Therefore, this decision meant abandoning all the beliefs, position, and even his own desires that he had preserved. I remained frozen for a long while.
In truth, it was the path I had wished for. To leave the palace far behind with Jiman and let everything flow naturally. I wouldn’t have to be swayed by Kadilen’s changed attitude. I wouldn’t need to struggle to revive a relationship with Devan that was already severed. If I went to a place where I could never see them again and lived peacefully with Jiman, perhaps I wouldn’t find the things that happened here as horrible as I do now in my final moment. Perhaps I could forget them all and return to the world I knew.
“Yes… alright. Help me.”
A relationship where both must forget each other to live. We were all in such relationships. I knew how much Wimu had sacrificed to help me. Seeing me accept his help, Wimu smiled faintly.
I committed that smile to memory and turned away from him. It wasn’t easy to maintain the will to escape while watching Wimu grieve. He didn’t try to stop me as I ran away. Only after running for quite some time until Wimu was completely out of sight did I grasp my knees and catch my ragged breath.
Now the end of the story was in sight. If his and my plan succeeded, I could finally wake up from this nightmare. Jiman might not agree immediately, but eventually, he would take my side. Despite it being news that should neither bring joy nor sorrow, complicated emotions disturbed my mind. I walked and walked for a long time, trying to shake off all those feelings. But walking through the palace only made me recall past events more vividly.
“Why is that still…”
For example, that painting hanging in the corridor. It was the painting I had contemplated with a strange feeling when I first met Zendal alone. The brightly smiling face of Ludin. It was an expression that didn’t match the current situation perfectly, but my eyes kept going to it. I made light conjectures as to why this face was still hanging in the palace.
At that moment, I heard the sound of clothes fluttering outside. When I turned my head absently, what I discovered was the person who had created the beginning of this entire story. As if entranced, I opened the door and went out.
Kadilen sensitively felt the wind brushing past his sword. His face, completely focused on the sword, appeared both peaceful and agonized. Languid light flowing from the sun half-hanging on the horizon embraced his silhouette. His silver hair, wet with sweat, fell down covering his forehead, but he rather closed his eyes calmly. Despite his blocked vision, his graceful movements smoothly sliced through the air.
I stood still and watched him for a long time. The more clearly I pictured my end, the more Kadilen’s existence blurred faintly. Discovering him wielding his sword right now seemed like a divine call to say farewell. I gazed at Kadilen’s figure, lost in thought.
The royal emblem flashed from the longsword he held lightly. His martial art was like a dance to a gentle song, yet also like a trap that could choke you at any moment. The blade, flowing quickly and beautifully, turned greatly and pointed toward me. He, showing signs of fatigue, finally opened his eyes.
“Ludin…?”
Kadilen looked at me in surprise while exhaling heavily. While I was hesitating, not knowing which words to speak first, he approached me.
“Don’t go.”
I was the one startled by his urgent tone. Perhaps my hesitant appearance seemed like I was contemplating escape, as Kadilen hurriedly grabbed me. Sweat dripped from his neck.
“I’m not going.”
Despite my answer, he didn’t withdraw his anxious gaze as he slowly put down his sword. Kadilen, dressed in thin martial arts clothes, looked even more beautiful, wrapped in the enchanting sunset light. I couldn’t help but look at him somewhat obliquely. He seemed to read something strange from me and walked closer with an eager face.
“Where have you been…”
Kadilen’s expression momentarily distorted as he moved, asking me a question. I looked at him curiously at the sudden pause in his speech. Kadilen stood still with an awkward expression. Alarmed by his suddenly pale complexion, I reached out to him.
“Are you alright?”
Kadilen waved his large hand as if to dissuade me. But the next moment, his waist bent and painful coughing sounds followed. Even though I rushed over and grabbed his shoulders in panic, Kadilen gasped for breath without even noticing. Only then feeling something was off, I watched his body collapse. Kadilen, who had been sweating excessively and breathing roughly, sat down before me and smiled awkwardly.
“Kadilen?”
“It’s nothing. The training was just too much.”
I stood frozen in shock, looking at Kadilen who was smiling with a face turned white.
