“Haha.”
As if he didn’t expect me to directly quote those words, Seo Nakil, who had been looking at me with a slightly shaken face, burst into quiet laughter.
“You never really believed those words either, did you?”
“Still, weren’t you firmly maintaining it?”
“I was.”
I don’t know the real reason why he’s so kind when we’re not really in that kind of relationship. I’ll find out someday, but somehow I don’t have the leisure to look into that truth right now.
So I decided to just pretend not to know anything, pretend not to be curious, and postpone it for a while.
“But for people living like family, we don’t know each other that well, do we? I mean, um. About each other.”
Seo Nakil, who noticed there was no reproachful nuance in my words, asked in a softened voice.
“Do you think you don’t know much about me?”
“Maybe I know just a little more than what others know?”
“You can ask me anything you’re curious about.”
Seo Nakil was a famous lead actor called a ‘walking box office guarantee.’ But what was truly surprising was that this expression wasn’t the only thing that described Seo Nakil.
The story about him being a third-generation chaebol was neither a lie nor an exaggeration. His family was Ritten Group, one of the world-famous hotel brands. The fact that his half-brother was the general manager of Ritten Korea could be found with just a little search on a portal site.
‘That penthouse was at Ritten Hotel.’
If there was one unusual point, it was that Seo Nakil wasn’t the legitimate son of that family. He was the child born when Ritten Group’s honorary chairman took a pottery master as his second wife.
It was obvious how much reporters who loved gossip must have followed those family members around.
“Something I’m curious about……”
After thinking carefully, I suddenly asked. If I had to ask something, I wanted to ask this first.
“Wasn’t it burdensome to have a life like an open book?”
“……”
“Um, I mean…… people keep being interested in parts unrelated to your career as an actor, actor-nim. There must have been a lot of false rumors too.”
“That was the case. Not everyone in the world is like you.”
Seo Nakil saying that seemed somehow a bit happy.
“I’m okay now. I should say I naturally became accustomed to it while growing up. Since one’s birth can’t be changed.”
“……”
“Still, I’m lucky. This family is quiet and clean compared to what they have. Since everyone covets different things, there’s no need to fight.”
At the gaze asking if I had anything else I was curious about, I hesitated and asked.
“So is that why you came into the entertainment industry?”
I wondered if he had left early because he didn’t want to have a mudslinging fight with family members over management rights.
“I think you must have been recommended a lot to be a model or actor since you were young.”
“Me?”
Seo Nakil shrugged.
“Not at all. Everyone said in unison. That I wouldn’t become a particularly noticeable person anywhere. My opinion was similar too.”
My hand lifting the coffee cup paused.
I think I just heard something absurd. Not noticeable? Of all people, Seo Nakil?
“That’s what most people said. That I’d manage what was left over, or go down to my hometown like my mother and live quietly.”
“……With this face?”
Seo Nakil raised the corners of his mouth slightly and asked back.
“What kind of face is this face?”
What kind of face? I couldn’t help but burst into quiet laughter.
“You can tell just by looking in a mirror. Are you asking on purpose?”
“I didn’t know. There was a time when I lived without looking in mirrors.”
The story that followed was far too unexpected.
“I had a complex about my face. People kept staring at me so excessively that I thought I was strange. So when I was young, I grew my hair long to cover my face and walked around with my head down.”
“Did you do that until your debut?”
“Not that. When was it? I think I fixed it before entering high school.”
If he covered his face and didn’t even look in mirrors, the complex must have been quite significant, but I couldn’t find even a trace of such shadow in him now.
‘Was there a catalyst that made him change?’
As if answering my silent question, Seo Nakil opened his mouth.
“Now it’s the opposite. I want to exist anywhere in the world, and I want to live in a form that anyone would have to turn back to look at at least once. What can I do? They won’t come to meet me first, so I have no choice but to show my face everywhere.”
“……”
“I also think, if I show my eyes, they’ll remember.”
“……Eyes?”
Unfortunately for the expectant-looking gaze, I didn’t fully understand his words. I could only frown at the ambiguous and unfamiliar feeling of something almost coming to mind.
The world beyond the large window was gradually getting darker. Seo Nakil, who checked the time, stood up first.
“Can you make time next week too?”
“I will. I’ll match your schedule, actor-nim. Should I come next time?”
“Mm. Then let’s meet at the penthouse instead of outside.”
Although it was a cafe with few people, it still wasn’t just us. The gazes of those who recognized him and glanced over could have been uncomfortable. I quickly nodded.
At my enthusiastic attitude, Seo Nakil smiled slightly and whispered.
“I mean for you to sleep over.”
My head that had been nodding vigorously stopped abruptly.
“That’s a bit……”
“Is it difficult?”
His amused voice continued.
“I see staying out overnight is included in the dorm rules.”
“It’s not prohibited, but I have to explain the reason well. The leader hyung is strict about this.”
“A reason. Isn’t it overflowing?”
He said leisurely while putting on his coat.
“We’re living like family, and I’m even your guardian. We’re going to enter the same work soon too.”
“That’s……”
As if he decided to stop the teasing that was making me uncomfortable, Seo Nakil’s voice became a bit more serious.
“There’s an examination schedule. The medical opinion is to follow up periodically for at least the next six months.”
“Examination?”
I asked in a puzzled tone. Since the lie about losing my memory was exposed, I thought there was no need for more examinations.
Seo Nakil, who saw right through my thoughts, reached out and tapped my nose.
“You were malnourished.”
“……Ah.”
That’s right. The time when I endured desperately without knowing my body was wearing down felt so distant it seemed like someone else’s portion.
Anyway, if it was a hospital visit schedule, even the strict Min Seungwoo would allow it. He might even nag that I should have gone earlier.
In the end, a schedule to stay overnight at his residence next week was created. I don’t know why I’m conscious of it when it’s not even the first time staying over. I deliberately ignored my heart beating more loudly than usual and returned with him to the underground parking lot of the company building.
“Thank you for taking me.”
Although I said I could go alone, I couldn’t break Seo Nakil’s stubbornness. In the end, I had no choice but to catch a ride in his car to the dorm.
“Drive safely.”
Separate from feeling sorry for troubling him, it was comfortable. The spacious SUV felt much less cramped than other cars.
I silently looked at Seo Nakil, who showed no signs of leaving even though I had finished greeting him. He seemed to be waiting for something, or perhaps expecting something.
What on earth…….
I, who had been searching for the answer, tilted my head slightly and said.
“I’ll see you next week.”
As if proving that was the correct answer, a smile appeared on Seo Nakil’s handsome face.
“Yes. Let’s meet again next time.”
I quietly mulled over the conversation we had just had while sending off the sunset-like man.
Let’s meet again next time. Those were truly strange and amazing words. When I leaned on those words that promised the future as if it were natural, even tomorrow felt somewhat livable.
I was fortunate. To be able to make such promises. To be able to have such conversations with Seo Nakil of all people.
I only turned around after Seo Nakil’s car completely disappeared from view. I kept glancing back with a regretful feeling, but doing so didn’t bring back him who had already left.
Just as I was about to enter the dorm like that, I flinched and stopped at a voice that rang out from the opposite side where the car had disappeared.
“Han Ijae.”
……It was Kwon Seonho.
