He climbed the stairs without hesitation and stood on the second floor, catching his breath for a moment. There was no other reason for climbing the stairs leaving Sehee and Jaehwi behind. It was simply because there was someone he wanted to share the happy news with first.
‘…Seonwoo hyung.’
It seemed to be a habit that Seonwoo came to mind first when something good happened. The habit he hadn’t erased until now seemed to naturally push his back toward where he was. While heading to the room where Seonwoo would be, Haeyoung thought of the situations that would naturally follow.
He would notice there was good news as soon as he saw his face. And he would wait with expectant eyes for what he would say, then when he finally told him what happened, he would be happy as if it were his own matter.
His drawn eyes would fold into a half-moon shape, and the corners of his mouth that would rise refreshingly were already pictured in his eyes. When a boyish smile rose on his white face, Haeyoung felt like he was being rewarded for all the time he had worked hard.
Haeyoung, who slowly began to walk again, stood in front of the room. Seonwoo would still be asleep. Gripping the doorknob in his hand and quietly opening the door, he stepped into the room. As expected, there was no movement in the silhouette lying on the bed. Haeyoung carefully closed the door behind him.
Click, along with the closing sound, he slowly approached Seonwoo’s bed. And bending his legs in front of it, he crouched down and took in the face of sleeping Seonwoo. Haeyoung didn’t find the time waiting for his closed eyes to open boring at all.
‘Haeyoung-ah.’
Because he knew the voice that would call him when he opened his eyes and discovered him. Waiting was generally boring, or trembling or lonely, but strangely the time waiting for him was alone outside that framework.
That even the act of waiting could be enjoyable was something he learned after meeting Seonwoo. Because he had told him that he had been waiting for him all this time.
It was the moment he was tracing the outline with his eyes along his features with his chin propped up.
With a short blink, Seonwoo’s eyes that had been closed all along opened. In the black pupils revealed between the long eyelashes, there was still sleepiness that couldn’t be erased.
However, the moment Haeyoung looking at him was captured in them, the haziness pooled on his face was instantly gone. It was something that happened in an instant, like dispersing smoke in the air with a few hand gestures.
“…Haeyoung-ah?”
Seonwoo called Haeyoung in a sleepy voice while rubbing his eyes. At the ambiguous call, a slight smile hung on Haeyoung’s lips. Seonwoo’s gaze fixed on the dimple that sank in next to the corner of his mouth.
It was a face that seemed unable to properly distinguish whether he was still not fully awake or whether it was reality.
“Yeah. Hyung, are you up?”
Haeyoung, who tilted his face with his chin propped up, asked in a deliberately playful voice. At that somewhat excited greeting, Seonwoo hesitated and stopped while nodding, and Haeyoung stretched out his left arm toward him.
The back of his hand that went up over Seonwoo’s face soon covered his forehead. The warmth of the forehead touched by the back of his hand was similar to before leaving the room in the morning. Haeyoung, who hadn’t been able to easily touch him in case he woke up, put down his worries considerably.
While Haeyoung placed his hand on his forehead and checked his temperature, Seonwoo was quietly watching such a Haeyoung. Seonwoo’s gaze stayed on the dimple embedded in his lips.
“You look happy…”
At the voice he heard, Haeyoung’s bent shoulders straightened. It was because his upper body that had been leaning toward Seonwoo became stiff with strength due to the thrilling sensation flowing along his spine.
Ah, he got it right.
The dimple that had been gradually fading revealed itself again. Seeing Seonwoo react exactly as expected, Haeyoung, who swallowed his laugh with effort, nodded.
“Yeah.”
“What happened?”
As if curious, he leaned his body toward the edge of the bed where Haeyoung was. At the precariously close distance, Haeyoung let out a quiet swallow.
“Mm……”
“Tell me quickly, Haeyoung-ah.”
Cha Seonwoo reached out and lightly tapped on Haeyoung’s cheek.
At the base of the urging spoken in a sweet voice, there was excitement he couldn’t hide. Haeyoung’s Adam’s apple, who noticed that expectation, rippled up as if making waves once, then settled back down.
He had intended to obediently open his mouth even if he didn’t rush him to tell quickly. Just seeing him behave exactly as he knew, not deviating even a bit from expectations… His chest somehow tickled, so he just unnecessarily took his time.
Haeyoung, who had been looking at Seonwoo, gripped the fingertips that came up on his cheek and opened his mouth.
“The law firm where I did the intern training… I think I got in.”
The voice that flowed out of his mouth was slightly calm. However, unlike the calm voice, the gaze that slightly rose was persistently chasing Seonwoo’s expression.
It wasn’t that he wasn’t happy the moment he saw the text. However, the first emotion that approached was surprise, and what raised its head next was expectation. Haeyoung realized that he could truly feel it only when he conveyed the contents of the text he received to Seonwoo and saw the joy coloring his face.
Seeing him whose eyes grew slightly at his words and then sat up, Haeyoung realized his thoughts were correct. Seonwoo immediately got up and sat on the bed.
“What do you mean you think you got in…”
“It’s not confirmed yet.”
“There’s no way you’d fail.”
“……”
A person who believed in him more than himself. Haeyoung, who was thinking for a moment where the faith he himself didn’t have came from, put down Seonwoo’s hand he was holding onto the bed.
More than half of the faith he had was probably based on affection. It was grounds that felt extremely emotional rather than rational. At Seonwoo’s firm answer, Haeyoung let out an empty laugh and refuted.
“I could fail.”
“…That can’t be. I’ve been watching all this time. You really worked hard, Haeyoung-ah.”
The trust that fell as if it were natural settled deep in Haeyoung’s ribs. That’s why he was at a loss for words.
Haeyoung knew that just because you work hard doesn’t necessarily mean good results follow. But even so, he didn’t want to give up even trying. Fortunately, he often had lucky moments when results followed his efforts.
However, he knew. There were many things in the world that couldn’t be obtained just by effort alone. The man before his eyes looking at him proudly was also like that.
A relationship where they were proud of each other, where they were each other’s pride. There was a time when he leaned on such a relationship to live day by day. And from the moment they broke up as a starting point, he thought he would never be able to meet such a person again.
But the relationship he had only thought had already faded quickly shed its dust in front of Seonwoo’s smile and revealed its form again. The smile drawn on Haeyoung’s face gradually distorted as if crumbling.
“Hyung, really…”
His head that lost strength turned downward. Haeyoung buried his face in the arm draped over his knees. From inside, a voice like a murmur leaked out.
“Haeyoung-ah?”
“……Yeah.”
“Haeyoung-ah, you…, you’re not crying, are you?”
A question with an evident flustered air was heard from above his head. Eventually, Seonwoo, who threw off the blanket and completely raised his body, hugged Haeyoung from above.
In the firm affection, Haeyoung wanted to reach out right now and embrace his back in return.
‘Ah, I think I’m going to die because I like you so much.’
So he had no choice but to finally admit it. The desire to willingly cling to the affection he gave and the warmth pouring on him.
He didn’t want to give up.
***
The interview schedule was two days after receiving the text.
While he was absorbed in interview preparation, chased by the not-leisurely time, Seonwoo was by Haeyoung’s side. It says it all that Haeyoung asked jokingly, ‘Hyung, you weren’t fired, were you?’
He definitely wasn’t not going to work, but whenever he suddenly raised his head, Seonwoo was always beside him. However, that wasn’t just because Seonwoo unilaterally approached him.
There was definitely a change in the relationship that had felt like walking a precarious tightrope.
“Haeyoung-ah, have a good day.”
Haeyoung, who had been seeing off Seonwoo going to work early in the morning, paused for a moment at his greeting. And soon scratched above his eyebrow with an absurd face.
“…The one going to work now is you, hyung.”
The greeting he gave was words that didn’t match the situation at all. However, Seonwoo only looked down at Haeyoung with just an affectionate smile. Even though white breath was coming from his mouth because it was winter, Haeyoung somehow felt like he was standing under the sunlight from that gaze.
So Haeyoung smiled as if he had no choice and waved his hand at him.
“Have a good day, hyung. See you later.”
What kind of power does the greeting to go and come back have? What about that short greeting, it makes someone’s empty space not lonely. While making him expect that he will eventually return as promised in advance.
After sending off Seonwoo, Haeyoung left the house receiving the send-off of the others who remained. The voices that had made a fuss seeing the suit he wore for the first time in a while for the interview were still vivid.
The interview was quite long. Because of that, the waiting time naturally had no choice but to lengthen, and during that time, he passed by and encountered a few familiar faces.
Once inside the interview room, his mind was rather more comfortable than when practicing. It was because the mentor lawyers who had become much closer through the several weeks of the intern process were conducting the interview.
Haeyoung, who had relaxed considerably at the familiar faces, calmly sat down. And not long after, questions and corresponding answers naturally followed.
‘During the internship process, you got high scores on all the common assignments submitted. What do you think were the factors that became plus points?’
‘…I focused on learning and applying the format taught in the training on the first day. Within the limits of not deviating from that framework, I think faithfully looking at and organizing the case worked as a plus point factor.’
‘Haha. Is there any change between the values about lawyers you wrote in your initial personal statement and your current values after going through the internship?’
Most of the interview was a personality interview based on the personal statement. Since the English interview only came from what he had prepared, Haeyoung could answer everything without difficulty.
During the Q&A, the interviewers had smiling faces throughout. Perhaps because of that, Haeyoung’s steps leaving the interview room were much lighter than before.
Since the atmosphere wasn’t bad, it seemed he did fairly well on the interview. It was the moment Haeyoung was exiting the building where the law firm was located with a smiling face. The vibration sound of his phone was heard from his outerwear pocket.
“Is it Seonwoo hyung?”
Along with the murmur, he stopped walking and took out his phone from his pocket. At the face that momentarily came to mind, a slightly playful smile hung on the corners of Haeyoung’s mouth.
However, for some reason, dreams always wake up at the happiest moment, and tragedy tends to come around the time you can finally smile a little more comfortably.
The expression of Haeyoung, who had been looking down at his phone with an excited face, soon sank stiffly.
The name that appeared on the screen wasn’t Seonwoo’s. It was a word he was seeing after a very long time, but a word that could never be unfamiliar was embedded dizzyingly clearly in Haeyoung’s view.
[Dad]
