The place Banye took me to was a Korean beef restaurant. The restaurant wasn’t very luxurious, but it was clean, and since they sold Korean beef, the prices were higher than other places.
‘Korean beef……?’
Banye doesn’t suddenly go to expensive places just because I’m buying. No, rather, even when I say I’ll treat him, he rarely takes the initiative to suggest doing something first.
And only after entering the restaurant did I realize that Banye suggesting we eat meat meant he would treat me.
“……Isn’t this place expensive?”
When I whispered quietly while sitting down, Banye made an expression asking what nonsense I was talking about. But when I urged him again with my eyes for an answer, he shrugged as if it was no big deal.
“It’s fine because money came in.”
“Money? Where did money come from……?”
“I told you I signed with Almond TV.”
When exactly did he sign that the signing bonus already came in?
And……
‘Did enough money come in to buy Korean beef?’
Just how much did he get?
I was looking at Banye’s face that had become glossy when I suddenly thought of the house. Because Banye originally came to my house planning to save up for a deposit by doing part-time work.
‘If he has money to buy me Korean beef, he should rather save it to make a deposit……’
I didn’t particularly show it, but as a man who confessed to me, living in my house wouldn’t be as comfortable as before.
Still, if it’s a signing bonus, wouldn’t he have received at least a few million won? Then instead of wasting it bit by bit like this, it would be better to use that money as a deposit to get even a studio apartment.
‘But if I bring this up, he’ll probably fight saying am I telling him to leave my house again?’
Still, on one hand, I didn’t want to raise my voice and fight with someone who’s treating me to meat out of goodwill because money came in. So I kept my mouth shut and just stared blankly with my gaze fixed on one spot on the table.
Meanwhile, Banye ordered meat from the staff. While awkwardly pouring water into glasses and placing chopsticks, the grill came up, and meat came out with side dishes.
I thought the portion was a bit much for two people to eat, but Banye’s actions were unrestrained.
‘He seems kind of excited somehow, is it just my imagination……’
I was observing Banye when I suddenly asked.
“But why are you suddenly treating me to meat?”
“You like meat, don’t you?”
At my question, Banye asked back as if puzzled. I was dumbfounded by those words and lost my words.
‘Well, I do like it. But why are you treating me……’
Do people usually buy meat for someone they rejected? Just because the other person likes it?
Banye left me confused and started grilling the meat. As the meat started cooking with a sizzling sound, the awkward atmosphere calmed down a bit. When the meat came out, it was also thanks to Banye focusing on the grill and not looking at me. Until then, he had been looking at me continuously, which was a bit suffocating.
“Should I grill too……”
“It’s fine.”
I asked because I was concerned about him holding the tongs the whole time, but Banye refused even that. So from then on, I just stopped caring and stayed still.
Then I brought up a question I’d been curious about all along.
“……How did you sign? You quit being a creator, didn’t you?”
“Almond TV said quitting as a creator was actually better?”
“R-really?”
I widened my eyes at Banye’s calm answer. Then Banye nodded.
“Yes. Because NewTube and creator activities could conflict with each other.”
“……I see.”
It made sense, yet at the same time was hard to accept.
Because on that day when he confessed, we fought when I asked if he was really going to give up…… it was because Banye seemed ready to quit both. In the end, if he was going to continue NewTube, it felt like we fought for no reason that day.
‘Did he change his mind because of Jorangi-nim after all?’
“Did Jorangi-nim persuade you to do NewTube?”
“Why does Jorangi-nim come up here?”
Banye frowned as if asking what I was talking about.
But I couldn’t quite trust Banye’s attitude. When he acted so decisively like he’d quit, why did he do NewTube again? No matter how much I thought about it, it seemed like Jorangi-nim persuaded him in the meantime.
“You were going to quit everything back then…… Ha, no. Never mind.”
“What?”
“Nothing. I’ll tell you after we eat.”
“……”
I was going to question and interrogate him one by one, but when I actually tried to ask, his ironclad attitude made the words not come out well. Also, the thought that I didn’t want to fight with Banye played a part.
Then Banye put a piece of meat on my plate with the tongs. When I just stared at it, he urged me asking what I was doing.
“Eat it. It’s cooked just right.”
“Yeah……”
I reluctantly picked it up and ate it, but it was delicious, and perhaps because I hadn’t eaten lunch, the meat I ate one after another melted smoothly.
I was picking up and eating the meat when I belatedly came to my senses.
“You eat too.”
“I’m eating. Want to drink too?”
“Huh? No…… I don’t really……”
I tried not to drink because I made a mistake drinking last time, but Banye had already ordered alcohol, and soju at that. In an instant, a soju bottle with a red cap was placed on the table.
I didn’t feel like drinking, but it was also a bit awkward to let Banye pour and drink alone. Moreover, today Banye was treating……
After deciding in my mind to ‘drink exactly three glasses,’ I emptied the first glass Banye poured for me.
‘Ah, shit…… It’s hitting me……’
Even though I only drank one glass, I could feel my body heating up. In comparison, Banye seemed no different from usual.
I thought three glasses would be too ambitious if I didn’t want to make a spectacle of myself like last time. So I just deliberately ignored the refilled soju glass and filled my mouth with meat.
On the other hand, Banye ate meat while drinking. His drinking pace was quite fast somehow.
“That’s already the third bottle…… Will you be okay?”
“I’m fine. Do I seem drunk to you?”
“It doesn’t seem like it……”
His speech was clear, and his eyes…… didn’t seem drunk.
But somehow it didn’t seem right to let him drink more, so I stopped Banye from ordering one more bottle. Banye obediently listened to me and didn’t drink more.
After I finished eating the meat with Banye who emptied three bottles minus one glass by himself, Banye paid for the quite expensive meat bill with his card.
Up until then, Banye walked straight, spoke properly, and his complexion was completely fine.
Until we came home, that is.
“Ah……”
“Huh? Huh? ……What, what’s wrong!”
As Banye was taking off his shoes, he lost his balance slightly and swayed, so I quickly supported him. Banye leaned his weight on me.
Because Banye hugged me with a thud, I froze stiffly. Because his hands were overlapped behind my back, I ended up completely trapped in his embrace.
“Wait……”
“Hyung, I’m a bit dizzy.”
His speech was still clear, but Banye was definitely drunk.
Hearing Banye’s words, I looked at his nape. His usually pale skin was now slightly reddened.
I tried to push Banye’s shoulder away with trembling hands.
“T-try standing properly……”
“Why do you keep pushing……”
But the more I pushed away, the closer Banye pressed against me.
At this point, I felt like I was going crazy. The smell of alcohol and meat from Banye’s body wasn’t unpleasant but felt sweet—does that make sense……!
‘D-do you think I have no pride?!’
I thought that, but my body kept wanting to stay pressed closely against Banye like this. My heart was pounding, and I loved Banye rubbing against me so much……
But I couldn’t do that.
I gritted my teeth and pushed Banye away. However, perhaps due to the difference in build, he didn’t push away easily.
I said with a tearful face.
“W-we can’t do this!”
I’d finally calmed my heart down a bit, but if you cling like this……! I tried to calm the emotions that were starting to stir again.
Then Banye made an unexpected sound.
“Why?”
“What?”
“……Why can’t we?”
Banye’s arms were still wrapped around my body, and the distance between us was too close.
Banye must not know what he’s saying right now. Just looking at his slowly blinking eyes, his unusually flushed face, and his strangely unfocused gaze, he’s definitely drunk.
And yet……
“……Y-you don’t like me…… So we, we can’t do this……”
“I don’t dislike you though……”
“Then…… do you, do you want to stay like this with me……?”
Even knowing I’d get hurt again, I ended up holding onto Banye and asking.
But Banye obediently nodded.
“Yes.”
