I didn’t try to hear the price since it would feel more burdensome if I knew, but I already knew it was a tremendous amount. Cha Jeonghan paid casually and answered briefly to the staff confirming the address that it was correct.
Both the personal shopper and the VVIP manager came down to the parking lot and stood by the car. Normally the car would have stopped in front of the department store’s main entrance, but not wanting to catch people’s eyes, Cha Jeonghan came down directly to the parking lot and got in the car. I bowed to the greeting staff and quickly got in the car, letting out the breath that had been stuffed up a bit. Even as the car was pulling out, the staff bowing behind us were reflected in the mirror.
“All my stress is gone. As expected, spending money is the best.”
“Don’t you have anything you want to buy? Buy something for yourself.”
“If I really want to buy something, I buy it right away. I relieve stress by spending money on you.”
“You’re really unique too.”
“It’s good that I’m unique, right?”
“Yeah. It’s good. Thanks for today. I’ll wear them well.”
“You do so much work and you keep saying thanks for just that much. Enjoy what you should enjoy confidently. I’ll give you a higher salary too.”
“I already receive a lot. It’s not like I desperately need money.”
It wasn’t comparable to Cha Jeonghan’s family, but I’d never lived worrying about money since I was young, so I didn’t really have greed for money. I always had enough money to spend where needed, and since I wasn’t the materialistic type, even with money there wasn’t much to spend it on. On top of that, Cha Jeonghan got me an officetel and solved all my food, clothing, and shelter needs with the highest quality, so I really had almost no reason to spend money. At most, occasional transportation costs or allowance I wanted to give my parents was all.
“You have no greed.”
“Just… if I want something but can’t have it, it’s sad. I keep thinking about it. If I want to achieve something but can’t, it keeps weighing on my mind. I hate that.”
“Really, then is there nothing you want to have, nothing you want to achieve?”
“……”
The first name that came to mind was Cha Jeonghan. I’d been suppressing it for over 10 years saying it couldn’t be, but at the crucial moment, the name that surfaced without being suppressed made me let out a small laugh.
“…Nothing.”
“Tell me if you think of anything.”
“……”
“I’ll grant it all.”
At the sincerely warm voice, I felt like I might cry, so I turned my head toward the window for no reason. Every time light reflected on the dark, thick window, my face rippled once.
“Just hearing it is enough.”
“It’s not just words. You know. I have ability, and I can give you whatever you want. It shouldn’t happen and it won’t, but even if you say you’re sick, I’ll save you completely, and if you’re in danger, I’ll rescue you. So be a bit greedy in life. You’re allowed to.”
“…Okay.”
“Look at you answering. Good boy, our Yuhyeon.”
The moment I turned my head toward the driver’s seat, Cha Jeonghan, who didn’t see it and was looking ahead, reached his hand out to me. As always, the hand that was going to stroke my head touched my cheek when I moved. The fingertips that paused briefly moved smoothly and skillfully stroked my cheek. I wanted to bury my face in that hand and cry.
“……”
The one and only greed that only you can grant, and yet you cannot grant. No matter how much I tried to think of other things, I faced Cha Jeonghan’s name for a very long time—the name that clung persistently and wouldn’t disappear.
* * *
While Cha Jeonghan went to exercise in the morning, I took out a bottle of strawberry juice to drink and opened the script and synopsis he’d given me to look at. I wasn’t particularly knowledgeable in this area, but I knew better than anyone whether this role suited Cha Jeonghan, whether this role could bring out Cha Jeonghan’s charm well. So when Cha Jeonghan had his heart set on a work, he would show me the script or scenario.
This role was also a chaebol role like his previous work, but a character with a different texture. If the previous role he took was literally a young master of a royal family, a character who had never bowed to anyone, this time he was a chaebol, but a character who had overcome countless conspiracies and words to reach that position and defended his place—in the process, things like trust in people or love didn’t exist, only ambition wanting to go to a higher place. The scale of the incident and the story were interesting, and it had a cinematic feel which was good.
<He doesn’t trust people, doesn’t trust love. And knowing he can become weak at any time, he doesn’t trust himself either. He just looks ahead and upward. Jaehyuk (tentative) has everything, but cannot be satisfied.>
Especially the description of the character in the synopsis seemed like it would suit Cha Jeonghan well. Because it was similar to things Cha Jeonghan had said to me.
‘I don’t trust anyone. Because they change the moment you trust them. I already trusted them, so even knowing they’ll change, I get dragged along trying to protect it, make efforts, and plead, but after they change, nothing is different.’
Cha Jeonghan didn’t trust people either. And he didn’t trust love either. Due to his personality of being very lonely and not taking people seriously, he didn’t push away people who approached, but he also didn’t embrace them to let them come close. Cha Jeonghan despised people who freely invaded his territory.
The women who had freely come to this house until now also completely ended their relationship with Cha Jeonghan as humans for the same reason. Even though they hadn’t formed any relationship, Cha Jeonghan couldn’t forgive them entering his space without permission.
Cha Jeonghan often told me he had a cleanliness obsession about human relationships. He always shook his head coldly, saying he didn’t want to share any emotions with people who would end someday. I was so scared that such a Cha Jeonghan might find out my feelings, so on nights when we had such conversations, I always had nightmares. Dreams where Cha Jeonghan got angry at me calling me a traitor.
<Still, deep in Jaehyuk’s (tentative) heart, a very small belief that someday there would be someone who could shake his heart hadn’t completely died out and remained. The embers were ready to come alive at any time.>
No matter how much he distrusted and loathed relationships between people, Cha Jeonghan would also have the embers that everyone has. When would Cha Jeonghan discover those embers ready to come alive at any time?
When those embers came alive, something called love would arise in Cha Jeonghan’s cold and lonely heart too. It would be unfamiliar, but still Cha Jeonghan would have no choice but to face that love. Because that’s what love is. Even if it’s unfamiliar because you don’t trust it and don’t look at it, it starts like that without you knowing. As Cha Jeonghan’s longtime friend, I hoped Cha Jeonghan could love very deeply. So I prayed that heart that was always lacking and therefore more lonely would be filled with love.
“……”
A laugh escaped at how absurd and a bit ridiculous I was—unable to pair the person I’d had a one-sided love for 13 years with myself, but hoping they’d be happy sharing love with someone else. It was definitely a laugh but it wasn’t funny at all.
“What do you think of the synopsis? Did you read the script?”
At the suddenly heard voice, I lifted my head and saw Cha Jeonghan approaching. I didn’t know he’d come in, but I was a bit startled when the sound suddenly came. It was really fortunate that my thoughts made no sound.
“Yeah, I’m reading it and the character seems good. I think you’ll bring it to life well, and I think this character can show more of your charm too.”
“Should I do it?”
“Yeah. I want to see you act this.”
“Got it. The company seemed to want me to do it too. The director and writer are all people who guarantee ratings, and it’s something others line up to do but can’t get.”
“Right. I saw this writer’s interview last time and the next work they mentioned then… oh, it must be this project? They said there was an actor who fit the image perfectly so they wrote it thinking of that actor, and they really hoped that actor would do it—it must be you.”
“They said they gave it to me first. Writer’s pick.”
Cha Jeonghan took out water and took a sip, then placed his hand on my shoulder as I sat. When I looked up at the weight solidly pressing down, a kind smile dropped right onto his face from the morning.
“I think filming starts in January next year… It seems good. I should say I’ll do it. Thanks for looking at it.”
“You’ll do well, and it’ll go well. Go shower. Let’s eat breakfast.”
“Okay.”
Watching Cha Jeonghan go to the bathroom, I got up and simply made fried rice. This fried rice was also made by putting in whatever I wanted and mixing sauces randomly, but Cha Jeonghan really loved this mysterious fried rice. The identity was unknown, but honestly the taste was decent.
I divided the fried rice onto plates and put them on the table when a vibration sounded. Looking at the screen, I saw the two characters “Noona.” Since we were both busy, it had been quite a while since she called, so I quickly answered and heard my sister’s voice, which had no composure at all.
“Yeah, noona.”
– Yuhyeon-ah. Is Jeonghan busy today? Are you going with him today too?
“No. I’m not going today, why? Is something wrong?”
– Perfect! I’m saved! The part-timer just contacted me saying their mom is unwell. Come before lunch time and help with business today. You know I can’t do it alone.
“Got it. I can get there by 11 at the latest.”
– Come then. Oh, a customer came. Hanging up. See you later.
“Yeah. See you later.”
Seeing me on the phone, Cha Jeonghan approached and sat down. I quickly placed utensils in front of him.
“Yuju noona?”
“Yeah. I guess the part-timer just contacted her saying they can’t come out today. She asked me to help with work today.”
“I heard noona’s cafe is doing well, she must be busy.”
“The area is all offices so a few hundred cups go out during lunch time.”
“The coffee is delicious though. I’d go today too if I didn’t have a schedule.”
“Let’s go together next time.”
“Yeah. It’s been really long since I saw noona. I think I haven’t seen her since the cafe opening.”
